A Thank You Bouquet
Doctor Three's career had taken a recent downturn. Between Alex Rider defeating quite a few Scorpia schemes and Kurst's, ahem, The Board's newest recruits, he had been doing significantly more paperwork than he had expected in his state of semi-retirement. Three had been expecting to be doing far more research. Not to mention, his esteemed colleagues seemed to think that he would be getting along with Razim. The man was an insult to the scientific approach that Three took. In fact, Three needed to set a few plans in-
BRRRRINNNG!
Three let out a sigh and picked up the phone. This had better be important. "Can I help you?"
"Razim and Julius Grief are dead! Alex Rider killed them."
All who had this number knew who was on the other end. Three was tempted to cheer in this case. "What a shame. How on earth did they die?"
The throat on the other end of the phone coughed awkwardly. "Julius Grief had a bullet through his head. It appears Razim…drowned in his own salt pit after a blow to the solar plexus."
Ah, yes. Alex's favorite little combat maneuver. It had been commented upon by Yermalov. "Fascinating. I'll expect the report as soon as possible."
Three hung up without waiting for a reply. These calls were far too expensive to waste on pleasantries. The teacher conferences were tedious, but allowed him to get to know the operatives that passed through the halls quite a bit better than his fellow board members. Alex was fast earning his way back into Three's good graces. Mostly because Razim drowned in a salt pit on his first major assignment. Perhaps the young man deserved a small thank you. Nothing too ostentatious.
Alex was suspicious the moment the doorbell rang. Neither he nor the rest of the Pleasures were expecting packages of any kind. He made sure to know. Mailing poison or explosives was still a valid way to kill your enemies and he had made plenty. He let out a breath before opening the door. On the doorstep was a flower arrangement. Alex opened the card.
The salt pit was wonderfully creative. Jet said you found gardenias soothing. Here's a signed copy of my book in case you need ideas. ;)
Alex felt the stiff wrapping paper. He inhaled, barely holding off the panic as he picked up the flowers and book and shut the door. The tag easily pulled off and crumpled into the trash. Let them think the flowers were a surprise he ordered for Liz. The paper came off with a tear. Alex looked down at the book. Torture: The Complete Case Studies, Expanded Edition. There was only one man Alex knew who wrote torture books that was still alive. He didn't dare throw the book away in case he was being watched. A signed copy of a book from Doctor Three himself said interest. Fucking hell. This was going to be a long next few weeks. Alex just prayed that he didn't have to meet Three in person.
It was some time before Three heard Alex Rider's name mentioned again. The interim had been filled with Kurst and the Grimaldi Twins being the coworkers from hell. Doctor Three let out a sigh as yet another harebrained scheme was laid out and voted in by his colleagues. And here he thought Brendan had some sense. Mikato was firmly in Zeljan's court and the rest were a little more ambiguous.
BRIIIINNGGG!
Three didn't dare hope that Alex had pulled off yet another assassination. Frankly, three executive board members, irreparable damage to their operations, and a class full of compromised assassins, and their two elite assassins dead was a miraculous career for a fifteen-year-old. "Yes?"
There was a pause on the other end of the line. "Operation Steel Claw failed. The Grimaldi Twins died in a rather explosive train accident in which the train was driven by Alex Rider. The children and babysitter were recovered by Rider."
Three wondered if it was bad taste to invite his fellow teachers to a coincidentally timed celebratory tea. His twentieth anniversary working for Scorpia was coming up, wasn't it? "Ah, well. Being on Scorpia's board is a risky business. A shame, but what can you do?"
There was a slight coughing noise on the other end of the line. Apparently, he wasn't the only one not a fan of the twins. Imagine that. "Yes, sir. Expect the report on Monday."
The line was cold before he hung up the phone. Three was rather fond of Klaus, dubious though his loyalties with regards to Rider were. The reports really were excellent and Three rather enjoyed wry little puns that crept their way in. He suspected that Alex had taught the man puns.
Alex was a little bit too tired to be suspicious of packages at this hour. The flower arrangement made him freeze. Only Three sent gardenias. Hell, he was pretty sure that nobody in his civilian life even knew he liked them. Jack probably wouldn't ask where they came from. There was another book wrapped in innocent-looking navy blue and gold paper. He sighed and picked it up. The book could go next to his other one on the shelf.
It seems that the twin menaces had a rather explosive end. I see Gordon prevailed upon at least one student. Enjoy my latest book!
Alex rather reluctantly opened the present on the kitchen table. There was no need to worry Jack with Three playing mind games and living his best life. He was ninety percent sure that these packages were sent solely to fuck with him. It was working. Jones was just…such a meh option. It wasn't like he was sending death threats.
The paper tore in a very satisfying way. The Importance of Ear Protection in a Ballistics High Career: A Comprehensive Study, Edition 3. Alex snorted at that. It would be more funny if it wasn't signed by Doctor Three. Maybe he should read up on it just in case. It was a bit less offensive to his sensibilities than the previous textbook. Plus, it might give enough answers for his school project since he hadn't picked the health condition he wanted to write a report on yet.
Fin
Based on a prompt by Zyzyax (see story summary). This is the 157th work in the Winds of Change 2022 Alex Rider Prompt event, where a new prompt (plus a short 1-3K work) is posted every day. For more details, see the AO3 collection. We have an index of all the prompts used in this event so far and going forwards - join the discord to get access to the online index (and to take part in our events, chat about everything and anything, and meet a load of awesome people!
