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Chapter 37

TRIS

I close my eyes and ravel through my brain of an image of a beach.

It is early morning, the night fog still hanging above the ocean and the sand vacant of any soul... but one. One single person walks on this beach, their bare feet imprinting the sand, but only for a moment. The path of the single person is erased with a single wipe of a wave.

But this person is not completely alone. There is another soul lingering on this beach, waiting behind the person. They are timid and want to be seen by the other, but this person hidden away is not strong enough, not brave enough, not worthy enough to be noticed.

I open my eyes, and I have my image, my inspiration. There is a crumbled piece of paper clipped to the top corner of my blank canvas, and my paint is fresh and waits to be liberated from their containers. Soon, the distinctively different colors will be combined with my brush and transformed into the beach I have in my mind.

The break between the water and the sky. The change in sunlight down the path. The imprints of the sand from the bare feet.

I get lost in my painting, forgetting about everything else around me. A single tap on my shoulder brings me back to reality. I turn my head and see Tobias staring down to me. He's sweaty, most likely just coming from his after-school lifting for football.

"Here I was thinking that you were waiting on me," he says. "I should have known you wouldn't go home after school, but come here to the art room."

"You said you wanted to see me after weight lifting, so I figured I'd wait here. Then, this idea for my project came to me and I couldn't stop."

We both look at my canvas, once blank, that now holds the beach I had in my mind.

"That's really amazing. What's the project?"

"Our assignment is to draw something inspired by a poem. We all drew them from random, and this is the one I got."

I grab the crumbled piece of paper that lays next to my easel and hand it to him. On it is a poem called "Where Your Bare Foot Walks".

I want to be where your bare foot walks,

Because maybe before you step, you'll look at the ground.

I want that blessing.

I open and fill; I fill with love and all other objects evaporate.

All the learning in books stays put on the shelf.

Poetry, the dear words, images of song,

Comes down over me like water.

As pieces of cloud dissolve in sunlight

This is how I would die

Into the love I have for you; the love I have for you.

Tobias looks up from the paper. "It's kind of sad, don't you think?"

"Yeah, it is. But it wasn't hard to connect to it. The narrator in this poem loves this person, but they can't get the person to notice them. They are so desperate they want to be where this person walks, just in the hopes that the person they love will look down and see them while they're walking. The narrator loves this person so much, nothing else matters. And they will do whatever it takes to feel love from them."

Tobias doesn't say anything, and he doesn't have to. I would rather not admit it, but this poem has a lot to do with my family. That desperate need to be noticed, to feel loved.

Tobias says, "Well, the painting is really good, but I have something I want to show you."

"What? What do you want to show me?"

"You see, it's a surprise... And if I tell you it will ruin the surprise."

"Fine."

A stupid smirk crosses his face, and he takes me hand and navigates me to his car. I'm glad that I am finally allowed to walk without the crutches, but I have to keep a brace on my leg. At least he bruises are almost all gone, except for the ones on my ribs. He leads me to the passenger side and in the seat is a blindfold.

"What's that?"

"Oh, you're gonna need to put that on in a little bit."

"I have to do what?"

"Don't worry. And besides, you told me once that you trusted me."

"Yeah, I'm thinking back to that moment of a lack of judgment."

He pulls out of the parking lot and drives down the road to my house. It is a short drive and when we pull into the drive and that is when he tells me to put the blindfold on. I'm a little spectacle, but I pull it over my eyes. I hear a door open and close, then my door opens. Tobias' hand grabs my arm and helps me out.

"What's going on?" I ask.

He laughs, and there is a nervous undertone to it. "You'll see."

We walk in and the second the door opens, the scent from inside reaches me. My favorite dinner: hamburgers. I'm hungry, and I almost take my blindfold off. But Tobias stops me.

"I'd ask what's going on, but I know you're not going to tell me," I say.

"We're almost there."

We walk down the hall and I know the path. He leads me to the study and I hear the door click open. Inside, my favorite Ellie Goulding album is playing low.

"Can I take it off yet?"

"Almost." He grabs both my arms and moves me to one distinctive place in the middle of the room. I hear him shuffle a little and the sound of one of my easels moving in front of me.

"Alright," he says, "you can look."

I lift the blindfold off my eyes and right in front of me is on my easels. But instead of one of my paintings or drawings is one made by Tobias; the distinctive TE in the corner gives it away. And the picture on the canvas.

There is the attempt of a bushel of flowers. Different beauties, from roses to daisies to lilies to lilacs. Every spot of the canvas is swarmed with a rainbow of colors. But in the middle, in bright letters, is PROM?.

On the floor is a little picnic with all my favorite foods. Hamburgers and chocolate cake. Tobias stands behind the easel with a single rose and a little bit of red on his cheeks.

"I didn't know how to ask you for the longest time, so I figured I would do everything you love. You are really passionate about painting, so I thought I would give it a try. And Tori helped me with everything else. I wanted to make it... you, because you deserve it."

I am in so much aww and surprise, I can't process what's happening. He did all this, for me.

"So... will you go to Prom with me?" He asks.

"Yes, of course."

I jump into his arms and kiss him. I kiss him and I try to push the words I want to say to him into this kiss. There is nothing here to stop me from kissing him. No weight of deep secrets keeping me from breathing. No monster still loose threatening to come back and hurt me. No, all there is here is him and I.

The kiss deepens, and I feel nervous. But it's the kind of nervous that excite my body and spike my heartbeat. The sensation inside of me grows warmer and spreads out from my chest, down through my body, out along my arms and legs, to the tips of my being. It scares me some, and I pull away slightly.

"I love you. And I love that you did this, for me," I say, our breaths mixing. His mouth travels to my neck, and I don't pull away. I'm going to Prom, with this man. This man I love. Then another thought occurs to me; it makes me smile. Then Tobias' hand reaches my side, right in my tickle spot.

I laugh slightly, and Tobias pulls away. "What is it?"

"Just thinking about Prom and with you and since I'm going, Christina is going to take me dress shopping. And it doesn't help that you got my... tickle spot," I say the last part shyly.

"Your... what?" He says with that smirk. Oh, no.

I don't have long to react before he jumps on me and starts poking around till he gets the right reaction. A laugh escapes my lips and he continues to make me laugh. '

"Stop!" I yell.

To my surprise, he stops and gets up, reaching out his hand. We walk to the little picnic set up in the corner of the room. I don't even bother with the burgers, rather I go straight to the cake.

"Dessert first?"

"Why not? It looks so good."

He nods his head and begins to slice the cake. While he cuts, he says, "So… Tickle spot?"

I sigh, "… Don't laugh. It's always been that way, since I was little. My dad would—"

A small silence takes the room, only the soft music still playing making any noise.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up."

"No, you're fine. He was kind of already on the mind, anyway." I think back to my art assignment. "There is something that is related to it that we need to talk about."

"What's wrong?"

I hate to kill the mood right now, but I promised no more secrets. And he should be the first person I tell.

"I… I'm taking the internship."

I watch his face turn from sorry to angry. "You're taking it? You're going to New York? You're leaving me? The whole summer?"

"It won't be the whole summer, just part of it," I say. "I need to do this. And if it's all bad then I'll come home right away. I'll call everyday… It won't change anything."

"Except the fact that you are choosing them instead of us."

"Please don't do this to me. I've thought a really long time about this. This could be the last thing I need for closure, don't you think I deserve that."

"What if you don't get that? What if going there makes everything worse?"

"I won't let it, I promise. Please, trust me with my choice."

"… I can't make you stay, can I?"

"No, but that's a good thing. We belong with each other, but that doesn't mean we own each other. I love you, and I want there to be nothing in between us. Please, please trust me with this."

"I trust you, but that doesn't mean I'm happy with you."

I catch an opportunity to flip his mood. "You see… You kind of have to be happy with me. You're kind of taking me to Prom."

A small smile, forced to stay away, crosses along his face. "How could I forget?"

I reach out and hug him. "I'm sorry I brought this up now, I just don't want to keep something like that away from you. I really do love your promposal."

"I love you, Tris."

"I guess you're alright…" I say. He reaches down and pokes my side, a shriek of laughter bursting from my throat. I peck him on the lips. "I love you."


Author's Note

The other night, this story reached the 100,000 views mark! Thank you so much! I'm glad that people are actually reading it. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think! Please review

Be brave, everyone!


QUOTES

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