I do not own anything, just my ideas.

Chapter 57

TOBIAS

There is something very comforting about waking up before sunrise—to enjoy the silence before the world wakes up. Especially running before the sun rises.

I've been having trouble sleeping, partly due to the fact that tonight is the first game of the season, and the other part is because my father will be attending that first game of the season.

I take comfort in the early morning run. Time seems to slow down around me and the busy world dulls to a small buzz. It is a most peculiar thing.

The moment ends, though, once I get back to the house and begin preparing for school. After a quick shower, I go to the closet and grab my school jersey; bright red with black and white lettering. I pair it with jeans and a belt, coach's orders. He says that if any pants fall below the waist and any part of the jersey is not tucked in, then the bench will be a busy place.

I grab an apple on my way out the door and make my way to school. The day winds down uneventfully until it is just about to end. It's the last class of the day, math, and then I get to walk out through the doors. It usually wouldn't be very interesting, but there is a class change.

Nita walks into the room.

I hear someone in front of me whisper, "She's transferring into our class. Had some drama in her original math class…"

I can tell the whispers get to her, so I pull my head back and don't listen to the rest. She sits in the empty seat next to mine.

Our teacher lectures for some time, but then says, "The rest of the class will be for homework. Feel free to use this time to get it done before the weekend starts. Work in pairs or independently."

I make the initial decision to work alone—a typical state for me.

Nita shifts in her seat next to mine. Something about it feels uncomfortable.

Nita is not the same as I remember. She was all fire and punk and energy. She was a Robin Hood kind of trouble in the sense that she did what she thought was right, disregarding any kind of punishment that could possibly arise. I see her eyes still hold the fire—it is what keeps her alive inside. And the punk is there, too. What's missing is the energy, replaced by a certain… despair.

"She's a good one, that girl of yours," she says, startling me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?"

"She's nice, a little bit of a gift for ignorance when it comes to boundaries, but than again you know her better than me."

"She's not ignorant." She is the complete opposite.

"Then there are two scenarios; either, she did not hear all the rumors about me or she is ignorant of them. Since I know rumors spread faster than about anything else in this world, and high school is notorious for spreading various stories, I am gonna go out on a limb and say she is just ignorant."

"Maybe she wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt?"

"People are far too unkind for that gratitude."

"She was new last year, too. Maybe she wanted to give you some advice?"

"I've been to school here before. And advice? Please." She rolls her eyes as if it is a joke.

"Well than, wisdom," I try.

Nita holds in a chuckle, but I am the one with the inside joke. Nita obviously doesn't seem to know it, but most of the time wisdom is nothing more than healed pain. Tris has plenty of it, and even though she can stand for herself, I still feel the need to do right by her.

"She could surprise you. Believe me."

"Oh, I heard all about her."

"So, do you believe all the rumors?" I mock. "I thought you were against the idea of them."

"You got me there, Eaton. But even I understand that we don't really have a choice in what people say about us."

My thoughts go to Tris and how everything that has happened to her has changed me, too. Not in the same way it has affected her, but it makes me think with a broader mindset now. Sometimes you have to reach out and touch into someone else's world in order to find what is missing in your own.

"Nita, we all have a choice, even if it means being ignorant."

"But you can't plan for what happens after you make that choice."

It isn't our choices that distinguish who we are. It's our commitment to them. I don't say this out loud because, based on her downward face, she knows it too.

I go back to the work in front of me. It feels strained and pointless—there isn't that much time left in this class, anyway.

The snickers beside Nita increase.

Nita grabs her books and stands. But before she can walk away, I say, "Don't let what people say about you get to you."

"What makes you say that? How do you know that what they say isn't true?"

I don't. But if I have learned anything from Tris, it is to not judge a book by its cover, or even its insides. The way you think about a person is not the way they actually are.

"Do you?" I challenge.

This takes her back a bit. "Well… umm."

"Take your time figuring it out. Once you do, it will be easier afterwards."


1—0

That's how we started the season. With last week's victory to steady my nerves and my dad not feeling like he has to keep such a close watch over my games, I walk into this game feeling good. It was a hard fought game during the first half, but we really took the game by the 3rd quarter, doubling our score and keeping the momentum up for the rest of the game.

Tris kept up her end of the deal. She stood at the edge of the student section. The crowd tends to be larger in the front and it gets thinner and smaller as you go up. Everyone wants to be at the bottom where all the action and attention is. They stand shoulder- to- shoulder and alternate between talking to each other, being foolish, and chanting this or that.

Technically, there are two sets of bleachers for the students on the left side of the stands, but the cool people will only linger on the right side. Tris, along with Christina and Marlene, sat on the far end of the left side—still in the student section, but away from the chaos. They can also see the game better there, too.

The even cooler people sit there.

A pair of arms snake around me from behind and give me a squeeze.

"What are you thinking so hard about?" Tris asks from behind me.

"I'm not thinking hard."

"Oh yeah?" She comes around to face me. "I could sizzle some bacon on that head of yours."

"All right, you got me," I say with a smirk. "I was thinking about you."

She gives me a look, but I see a blush rise on her cheeks. "And?"

"And, how I'm winning the bet… which means you're losing."

At this, she takes her hand and tries to shove me. I grab a hold of her wrist and pull her so she is flushed against me.

"What are you…" she tries to start, but it ends with a laugh.

My hands slide over her shoulders to her back. Her laugh stops and we stand in soft silence. The moment only lasts the space of a heartbeat, but it feels much longer. The stillness is calming. I take a deep breath in and smell the floral scent from her lotion. Hmm… She reaches up to her neck and grasps the necklace I gave her.

"You need to focus," she says.

"I am."

"On the game. Tonight."

"I will."

"Will?... When?"

"After…"

"After?" she repeats in a whisper.

I bend down to kiss her softly. It's nothing showy, but it feels right. Her hand lets go of the necklace, and reaches out for me.

Once again, in the space of a heartbeat, she flinches. I don't think much of it, especially when her fingers slide into my hair.

Then she does it again. But this time, she jumps.

"Tris, are you okay?"

"I—I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, you seem…," I look closer. "You know you can tell me if something is wrong."

"Of course. It was just my phone; it buzzed in my pocket." She steps back up to me and kisses me on the jaw. "You need to go get ready for the game. I'll be watching from the stands."

"The students' stands."

"For now," she says with a smile, but it falters the moment it comes. Catching herself, she gives me a soft look. "Good luck, Tobias."

"Thanks." I say as she turns and grabs her bag. I start to turn and walk away too, but her movements pull me back. She reaches into her bag and grabs her phone out, the screen appearing to be black as night.

She didn't have her phone in her pocket at all.


Author's Note

Not much to say, but thank you to the people still out there reading this. I know I am kind of the worst when it comes to updating, but I am trying to do better. New Year's Resolution (among many)? Maybe?

And HUGE shout out to Eunice339! She is a fabulous Beta and helped out a lot! Much love.

Be brave, everyone.


QUOTES

1). The future is scary and it is so tempting to run back to the past because it is familiar. But no matter how much you revisit the past, there is nothing new to see. –How I Met Your Mother, television show

2).I am not very good at art, but it doesn't matter. It's the fun of doing it that's important. Now, I wouldn't have made that if I'd just thought about it. No matter how anybody says it is, it feels good to have made something. The best thing is that each person's would be different. In a way, you've already won in this world because you're the only one who can be you. And that's the way it's supposed to be. –Mr. Roger, person

3). Kind people have a way of working their way inside me and rooting there. –Mockingjay, book

Congratulations to: No one guessed!

There are 2 (television show, book) quotes in this chapter.