To Arika Koski 2022, The Secret Life of Pets is mediocre to me, and I'm more of an OliverxSagwa fan. I prefer Oliver and Marie as friends. I also happen to support Penelope with both Pepe AND Sylvester. I try to keep an open mind about things. Sylvester isn't always bad, he has moments in the Looney Tunes franchise where he's good. If you don't like her with the latter, it's your opinion; I can't force you to like it if you don't want to, and neither should you. Please try to be a mature adult and respect my opinion. I have literally not left nasty capitalized comments on your things. If you can't say anything nice and respect other people's views, either say it calmly and politely or don't say anything at all.


(Act 2)

Soon Stanley and the mice colony grabbed all the food they can, and the mice carried the food on their backs the way ants would. They had to ship out while the getting was good and not look back!

As they passed Loofah's beat-up yet well-conditioned and well-functioning tan-colored Dodge, Stanley made a double take upon spotting the car. It was then he got an idea, giving a wide, mischievous smirk. This would also be another good way to get back at that old biddy!

So he wasted no time at all to get in the car, and he did it with no problem. How? The simple answer was that Loofah didn't have the decency to lock the doors. He planned to steal her car and make a getaway in it.

He spotted that the keys were inside the ignition. Stanley mockingly said, "Thanks for leaving the keys inside, Miss Loofah. Greatly appreciate it." He turned the keys, starting the vehicle up. The little cat curled his fingers up, getting ready to take the wheel when he took an important detail into account. "Wait, I can't drive."

Then the father mouse hopped in beside him, declaring, "And that's where we come in." He gave a whistle, and sure enough, the doors were opened with the combined strength of the mice, and the food was packed into the back seat. Stanley then yelped as he was lifted up a bit, and the source of that was the mice stacking three books underneath him so he could reach the wheel better. "You aren't quite ready to make it out in the big world all by yourself, and that's why you'll be needing an army of friends to help you get ready."

Pair of the mice hopped on top of the wheel while a couple more went towards the stick and pedal respectively. Soon the mice took control of the car while strapping their new cat friend in with the seatbelt, and as they backed up a bit into one of the house's wooden poles, smashing it.

"Oh! Hope that can be replaced." Stanley remarked with a wince. So the mice helped pull away from the sight, driving the car down the path though they didn't drive very fluently. In fact, it was more reckless than fluent, but what do you expect when mice's bodies are at the wheel instead of a human's hands? Why, when they got to the fence, they smashed a part of that as well. However, they didn't have time to be concerned about that, so they ignored it before Stanley said to the house, "Farewell, you wretched old hag! It hasn't been fun." He and the mice all whooped in victory as they sped off away from the residence to their new life.

"And so Stanley went off with his new mouse entourage in his ex-owner's vehicle, venturing off to find a new better life."


A bit later, the group had out-distanced themselves far from their old home and were driving down the highway. The mice were still helping Stanley drive. The animals weren't the best at driving, but at least not much damage was done. As they drove, the mice and Stanley were celebrating their new freedom as they sang along with "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" by Rupert Holmes on the radio, but they did so with their own modified lyrics.

Stanley sighed happily as he spoke to his rodent friends, "I can't believe we're actually breaking out on our own, everyone."

"Nor can I," the son mouse added. "I can't believe we didn't think of teaming up to do so sooner."

A fat mouse, eating from what seemed to be a container of butter, said, "I can't believe it's not butter. Want some?"

Stanley said with a frown, "After you've tasted it? No thanks."

The father mouse then brought up an important question, "So, Stan, what are your plans now that you're a free cat?"

"You know, at the top of my head, I haven't the foggiest notion. We have more freedom than we know what to do with. All I know is we're young, we've got wheels, I've got a new crew by my side, and we've got an enormous supply of food stored in here." Then the sound of approaching hoofbeats were heard. "Hey, do you guys hear hoofbeats?"

"And this is where we meet the second main animal of the group."

Suddenly, an old donkey came running their way, and then...THUMP! All the mice and Stanley screamed in alarm as they careened over to the right of the road, coming to a screeching halt. The animals panted heavily as Stanley shut the radio off and exclaimed in concern, "Guys, I think we just hit that donkey! I hope we didn't kill it! You all wait here."

He got out of the car and ran in worry to where the lying donkey was. The donkey was old, scraggly yet bulky in some parts, had dark blue-gray skin with a lighter color of its muzzle and stomach, dark brown eyes, short black mane and black tail.

Stanley exclaimed in concern, "Oh good lord, oh good lord, oh good lord, oh good lord! Excuse me, sir...or madame..." He then took a look between the donkey's legs. "Yeah, you're a sir. Listen, if you can hear me, my friends and I didn't mean to hit you with our car. We didn't see you coming." After a short instant of silence, the donkey then moaned a bit as he came around. This relieved the cat greatly. "Oh! Oh thank God you're alive! I didn't kill a pedestrian! Listen, I'd appreciate it if we kept the insurance companies out of this, or better still, the humane society. Wouldn't you agree?"

As the donkey got to his feet, he groaned, "Nnnngh...I'm just glad you're not selling me to a glue factory...ouch."

"Believe me, had my friends and I seen you were coming, we would have never in a million years, hit you."

"What's a little cat like you doing driving a car anyway?"

The cat admitted sheepishly, "Well, technically, all my mice friends were helping me do all the driving, and it's our first time doing so. We just escaped my old ex-owner."

"Really? Small world," the donkey said. "I just ran away from my old ex-owner as well."


*Flashback*

Earlier before this incident, the donkey himself was at his old mill, being loaded up with a few sacks of flour stacked on his back. Another day, another dismal work session.

"The donkey, whose name is Monroe, explained to Stanley his story about HIS miserable life. He carried bags of flour day in and day out, and since his voice wasn't half bad, he sang as he slaving away. Though as he got older, he preferred singing over working. His owner, Miller Gerald Morgan, didn't care for his singing however. He wasn't abusive like Old Lady Loofah, but he was hardly supportive either."

Monroe, the donkey, tried his best to carry these heavy sacks as he sang some verses of the old folk song "Sixteen Tons" (originally by Tennessee Ernie Ford) in misery. Along the way, because he couldn't hold the weight of ALL the sacks, some of them were dropped along the way, making him groan. It must have taken him half the morning to make more than one trips to pick each three of the dropped ones and carry them all to the mill.

That really wore him out, for when he returned to his stable, he collapsed in exhaustion. Then his owner, Miller Gerald Morgan, approached Monroe, speaking to him, "Well, I heard you singing again, and this time it seemed to be a very dreary song."

Monroe, able to speak to humans as well, told him, "I've lost motivation to sing any spritely tune, if that helps."

"I've come to the decision that you are indeed getting too old to continue to work around here. As of now, Monroe, I'm relieving you of your duty and replacing you."

Hearing that gave Monroe a feel of relief and joy. "That means I can retire in peace, right?"

"Oh, I'm afraid not. Your singing is too distracting to the staff and other animals around here. No, the only use we can make off of you is selling you to Machenry's."

The donkey's eyes widened in horror, and for a good reason.

"M-M-Machenry's? As in the glue factory?" Monroe stammered in worry. "Couldn't you give me to a petting zoo that accepts donkeys?"

Morgan dismissed, "Nah, they don't pay as much. Besides, a singing and talking donkey? That will freak the kids out and send them crying to their parents. There ain't no way I'm contributing to that!" He then heard the sound of a truck arriving outside. "Ah, that should be the employees right now. Your suffering will be over soon, old boy."

He then left the stable to the loaders of Machenry's who have just arrived to escort Monroe to the glue factory. This didn't look good for the poor old donkey.

The donkey said to himself, "Before they get the chance to turn me into glue, I oughta just vamoose!"

So he prepared to sneak to a back exit, but before he could, the doors swung open and the glue factory loaders, one a muscular woman and the other a skinny man, came in with Morgan, carrying some rope.

Morgan told the two, "Yep, there he is, all ready to go."

Monroe backed away as the loaders gently neared him, with the woman telling him gently, "Now, now, big fella. We're not going to hurt you. We're just here to take you to a place that will transport you to Donkey Heaven." They then placed the rope around his neck, and he immediately freaked out, struggling to get out of it, but the yelping loaders pulled on the rope and fought to keep him under control.

Morgan said to the donkey, "Come on, old man, accept your death with dignity!"

"Come on, big boy, nice and easy." the woman loader said to the struggling donkey.

The male loader added, "Come on, now, don't struggle. You'll only make this harder."

"No! You're not taking me alive!" Monroe snapped. He then managed to break free from the rope, and the humans' grip, and kicked Morgan and both loaders, one by one, sending them to the ground hard. He then charged out the doors and bolted from his home as far away as he could, bound to keep running in worry. Though an old donkey, he managed to hop over a fence along the way before he kept running. He was bound to keep running and never look back.

*End of Flashback*


"And soon I came running down this way and into your car!" Monroe finished his explanation. "To be honest, I'm not sure which one of us is the real one at fault here."

Stanley felt real sorry for the old donkey. "So your ex-owner was about to have you offed for not doing your job, and for singing and talking. Believe me, we're in the same boat here." He then thought of something. "Say, why don't you join me and my mice friends? We're off on a journey to start a new life for ourselves. I mean, it's the least we could do to make up for almost killing you."

"You sure you want me to join? There might not be room in your car," Monroe said, squinting at the car from afar.

"Oh, I'm sure you won't take up a WHOLE LOT of space. So, you on board, old timer?"

"Travelling with a cat and a pack of rodents? Not very conventional, but I'll take that over getting turned into glue or carrying flour any day. Oh, but is it alright if we go to a place where an old friend of mine lives. I was heading there to hopefully take shelter in before running into you."

"Your friend?" the cat asked curiously.

"Yes, he's an animal who's also into music, and he's young just like you. We haven't spoken to each other so long but I think it should be fair to pop by and say hello and goodbye to him before I depart for the world," Monroe explained.

"Give me a second." Stanley then hurried to the car and climbed up to the window to speak to his mice friends. "Guys, our latest victim, who's survived, by the way, is joining us on our little escapade. I hope you're all cool with that."

The mice felt uneasy about bringing a donkey with them in their car. They all then conferred over the matter, with Stanley curious to what they were whispering and murmuring about. Monroe, who came over to the car's window, stuck his head in, also curious about the conversation. After much deliberation, the rodents turned to their feline comrade.

The father mouse decided, "Very well, he can come with us, as long as he doesn't break too much or squash any of us."

Monroe said with a chuckle, "Oh, don't worry, I'm pretty trim for my age."

(End of Act 2)


Well, Stanley and the mice have a new friend joining them in their freedom. They will also be heading to another farm to pick up another in the next act: Monroe's old friend, Dimitri the rooster. Not to give away too much, but they end up having to rescue him.

If anyone has suggestions for what should be done with the characters throughout this story (not only for this episode but for any upcoming parts of this extended modern take on this fable), I would seriously greatly appreciate it. Also, if anyone has comments on what things I should edit into this second act, please tell me in private message and I may consider them. No promises though.

By the way, I thought of this version of the Bremen story having a plot similar to Homeward Bound and The Blues Brothers later on. You know, a musicians-on-the-run plot.