CHAPTER SIX - NOT SO PERFECT

Michael still could not believe that he got his hand back. Technically, he did not get it back. It is a new hand grown from his DNA. He had stared at it for hours, unable to look away, fearing that if he does, it will be gone. He feared it's all just a dream and one day he will wake up with a mechanical hand once more.

He thanked Nikita in every possible way he knew how. He owes her everything, not just the hand. They've been at a good place before she left for Kosovo. When Birkhoff told him what she was planning, he would have chopped off his other hand if it means saving her. She was alone in a foreign country facing guards of a Deputy Minister. To hell with a new hand, he only wants her. He needs her. Luckily, his woman can pull off miracles. She returned with the prize.

"Have I already said thank you?" he asked while clinging to her in bed.

Ryan has given them the day off and he intends to spend it with her inside their room. She giggled and buried herself further into his arms.

"I lost count. Seriously though Michael, you don't have to say that to me", she answered.

It only made him hold her tighter. What the hell did he ever do to deserve Nikita? Even Owen asks the same question. To be honest, he has no idea. He'd done so many unforgivable things to her. He hunted her down. He betrayed her, double-crossed her. When she stopped him from killing Kasim, he wanted to hurt her. To think that he even had that thought in his head for a moment to hurt her, it makes him sick to his stomach. Meanwhile, Nikita did everything she can to be there for him, to help him. Even when she shot him on his shoulder, she did it to save his life. She has never taken any action without any reason or purpose to it.

"Hey, where did you go?" she asked while gently tracing his face with her fingers.

"I was just thinking",

"About what?"

"About how I keep on hurting you and you're still here with me", he responded.

He saw her frowned, confused by what he just said.

"I think it's the other way around, Michael", she muttered.

"If you're going to tell me that you destroy everything you touch, I am going throw this pillow", she chuckled. "I mean it, Nikita. Don't ever think that for a second because without you touching our lives, all of us will be lost. If you hadn't saved Alex, she would still be an addict or maybe even dead by now. If you hadn't saved me and Birkhoff, we both still be under Percy and Amanda's clutches carrying out their dirty works. If you hadn't saved Ryan, he would have been another Division casualty. Let's not forget about Owen because that guy is hard to save and you won him over"

He cradled her face with his new hand.

"Nikita, you do not destroy everything you touch. You fix them", he made sure to emphasize every word so it will sink in.

He is aware of her tendency to blame everything on herself. That's how she is even before they met. The way she was brought up by her foster parents made her that way. She feels responsible for everything. That's why she makes decision for everybody without a second thought. She takes the fall for everyone without hesitation. She will risk her life for everyone if it comes down to it. She takes care of everyone but herself.

"I love you, Michael. I need you to know that. I will do anything for you…for any of you", she declared.

He smiled.

"I love you too, Nikita, and I will do anything for you as well", he responded.


Something is off with Nikita. He's been noticing that for days now. Ever since the mysterious death of Phillip Hayes, Nikita is distant and distracted. She does not participate in missions like she used to and she's always out.

Michael knows he's not alone in noticing the change in Nikita's behavior. Alex tries to rationalize it as Nikita learning to step back and allowing others to take charge. That's how Nikita phrased it. She delegates to other agents. Her way of telling them she trusts their abilities to carry out the mission. Alex and Sean mostly lead every assignment so they're not around that much to see what he's seeing.

Owen does, he mused. The man has an eye like a hawk. He sees everything. Michael watched as Owen follows Nikita's every move with his eyes. He sees it too so he decided to talk to him instead.

"What are you not telling me?" he asked.

It seems the firing range is their favorite spot to talk. Owen frowned at him and shrugged.

"Nikita…you know something that I don't. What is it?" Michael clarified.

It was brief but he caught it. Something flashed across Owen's face and he knew he's right to talk to him. He does know something.

"You should talk to her instead of me", Owen suggested.

"She made you promise not to tell anyone", he deduced. He knows if Owen is asked to choose a side, he will always choose Nikita's. That's how loyal he is to her. Michael will always be grateful for such devotion towards his fiancé but right now, he needs to know what's going on with Nikita. "I can see that you're worried about her. I don't know a thing and I can feel something's off with her. Now, I cannot do anything about it if you will not tell me what's going on with her. Owen…please…we both care about her. Just tell me", he pleaded.

Owen sighed in defeat, seeing reason from what he said. In a flash, the man looked older than he looks.

"She did not tell me the specifics but that new hand of yours wasn't free. I think…she's paying it now", Owen revealed.

Michael frowned. He was told that it was a gift from Heidecker because Nikita saved his life.

"Phillip Hayes?"

Owen nodded. "Again, she did not confirm it",

"She does not need to", Michael muttered.

Her actions in the past few days did it for her. He should have known better than to believe things have finally settled down. It's just too good to be true and yet he allowed himself to believe it because he wants it so badly. He should have known that Heidecker previously worked with Percy. The man would not let someone with Nikita's skills slip through his fingers just like that.

I love you, Michael. I need you to know that. I will do anything for you…for any of you…

That's what she said. He failed to see what she's trying to say between those words. He knows she hates keeping secrets from him so she would find a way to let him know without saying the actual words. He just failed to catch them.

"We need to find her now", he barked.


It spun the entire team into panic.

Nikita out there assassinating people is enough to cause such alarm. She's the greatest asset Division has ever created. There is no denying that. That's why knowing she's out there doing hit jobs for other people scares them. She rarely misses her target. Though she thinks she's doing it with a good cause, Michael knows it will eat her up afterwards. The guilt will creep up fast and it will ruin her.

She is extremely good at killing but it does not mean she likes it. Michael is quite aware how much Nikita loathes the gifts she's given. She tries to use it for good but the fear that the evil in her will win is strong. To be frank, it scares him too.

He learned the reason why Brandt was so furious with her when he got out of prison. He wasn't in Division that time but Birkhoff discovered archive footages from Division when they takeover and Michael saw how Nikita just lost control with Brandt. The woman took his eye out with her bare hands for crying out loud. That's a part of her that she hates so much and has kept locked deep inside her.

"Got a hit. She's last spotted at the business district. She posed as Irina when she approached the desk at a car dealership building. There", they all saw Nikita dressed in black corporate suit. Her hair was done in perfect curls. Eyeglasses completing the look of deception.

"Why was she there?" Alex asked.

Birkhoff worked his magic and followed the trail of Nikita through the building cams. She entered the elevator the exited at 12th floor of the building before entering one of the offices.

"Whose office was that?" Ryan asked.

Birkhoff typed some more. "Herbert Olsen, another big shot",

A few minutes later, Nikita came out from the office and sauntered her way out of the building. Sean buried his head onto the tablet before freezing.

"Uh, guys…you might want to see this", he projected the screen to the big one. "This happens just an hour ago", he said.

Herbert Olsen is found dead in his office. It was ruled out as aneurysm, but they knew better. It was Nikita. She had killed Herbert Olsen.

"Birkhoff, find her. I want to talk to her now", Michael barked and stormed off the room.


It took another four hours before they located Nikita. She's now in Upstate New York. Michael did not waste time and went there with Owen, Alex, and Sean. He clung to his rifle on the way there.

"We'll get to her", Alex said reassuringly.

He nodded. He's sure they will catch up with her but what worries him is that what will happen when they do? Nikita is out there paying for his new hand. What would that do to her? He dreads just thinking about it. He does not want her to further suffer because of him. Guilt filled him up. If only he managed to handle it better…if he hadn't pushed her away…she would have let him too and he would be there to stop her, to reign her in just like what he always does.

"Birkhoff, status?" Sean asked through the comms.

'Nikki is still there. Heat signature indicates five people inside. Four might have been hostages…jesus, Nikki', Birkhoff breathed out.

Michael closed his eyes. He's suddenly reminded of Nikita's early days. The rest of the team weren't there in the beginning. They just think that Nikita is not capable of being cruel and ruthless but they would be wrong. Percy used to say that Nikita has always been a natural. For someone like Percy to give that kind of compliment to someone is scary. It scared Amanda in the beginning too. She had pushed for Nikita's cancellation multiple times until Michael learned how to get through Nikita. Then, she turned into the greatest agent Division has ever seen.

Amanda used to say that Nikita without any control can set the world on fire. Michael thinks she's right. How funny is that? Him agreeing with Amanda…it's strange but with that regards he does.

"We're here", Owen announced.

The moment the car stopped, Michael hurried out and ran inside the house. He noted that the guards were all down, not knocked out, but killed. Nikita killed them. Alex and Sean looked at each other in puzzlement before following him and Owen towards the house.

They moved quietly so not to alarm Nikita and spooked her. If they intend to talk her out of this, they need a careful approach not an aggressive one.

It's too quiet, Michael mused. When they reached the kitchen though, they were all left speechless.

Nikita is standing in the middle of four people bound to chairs: a middle-aged man and woman, and two teenage girls that were blindfolded.

"Nikita…" Michael uttered in shock.

When she turned to them, her eyes are watering as she had her gun pointed towards her hostages.

"I'm sorry", she whispered.