The first thing Battler did after running out of the dining room was to look for the other kids. They weren't out in the rose garden so he checked the guesthouse. He searched the rooms until he got to the cousins' room, and inside he could here laughter. For a second, Battler's heart was filled with sadness and envy. They were having fun without him!

Then he remembered the situation and felt stupid again, so he ran inside.

"Guys guys some blond asshole just showed up and murdered our parents!"

He brought them to the dining room and showed them the corpses of Krauss, Natsuhi, Kyrie, Hideyoshi and Rosa and all the kids started crying especially Battler - a delayed reaction on his part, but still.

"What kind of asshole would kill all our parents except Battler's bastard dad!" said Jessica, forgetting Eva was alive too.

"He was Ryuji Gohda," said Kinzo. "After Gohda left the island he had sex left and right, and it turns out one of those ladies had a baby that grew at a faster than usual rate. Now, Ryuji Gohda's come to get revenge on all of us! OOOOOOGH SPARE US BEATRIIIIIIIICE!" he screamed into the sky.

Eva was the first to speak over the grandfather's incoherent crying.

"First thing we've got to do is call the police!" she said.

"Got it Aunt Eva!" Battler got up and dived for the telephone but he yanked the receiver so hard the cord broke!

"Shoot, Battler!" said Rudolf and he grabbed the boy's ear. "Now Ryuji Gohda's gonna kill us all!"

"Hrm well..." said Nanjo. "At least he only wants to kill the Ushiromiyas. That means I'm safe. Better than nothing, ho ho!" Nanjo chuckled.

"WAIT A SECOND!" shouted Battler! He straightened up in shock, causing Rudolf to lose his grip on his ear. "The Ushiromiyas weren't the only people Ryuji Gohda said he was gonna kill, he said he was going to kill someone else!"

That's when he realized that he had foolishly forgotten to tell Shannon and Kanon to come with them!


Ryuji Gohda kicked the door to the guesthouse down once Battler and the rest of the kids had left. He was annoyed. He was annoyed because his scheme was not going perfectly according to plan. What he wanted to do was shoot everyone dead while they were still eating, but the kids had already left so he couldn't do that. Now people were aware he was here so he had to be more careful. That's why he waited until Shannon and Kanon were alone to take on his next targets.

He strolled up the stairs and kicked open the door to the cousins' room, where Shannon and Kanon were tidying up. But then they stopped tidying up and faced their intruder.

"Ryuji Gohda!" said Shannon. She had heard about him because Gohda told the family about him when he was born.

"That's my name! Don't wear it out..." then Ryuji took out a sword. "...not that either of you will have the chance to!"

"W-Wait!" shouted Kanon. "Don't kill us we're just servants, we're not Ushiromiyas!"

"Hya ha ha ha!" laughed Ryuji Gohda. "Don't know about that! I've done my research, and I know the two of you were born to that mad man Kinzo! And not only that..."

Ryuji Gohda's glare hardened.

"...but you've been plannin' to kill the family yourself! But there's only room for ONE culprit in this story!"

Then Ryuji Gohda swung his sword forward, towards Kanon's chest! It was supposed to go through him, but an invisible force froze him before he could. He looked toward the maid, who was using some weird magic that created a red barrier between him and Kanon!

Ryuji Gohda clenched his teeth because he was frustrated. This must be one of those infamous powers of the would-be culprit of Umineko. This was the dreaded fantasy scene, where reality and fiction converged!

Kanon formed a red blade of light in his hand and swiped it over Ryuji Gohda's face. Ryuji Gohda stepped backwards to dodge the swipe and held up his sword. Kanon then moved to swing his blade again, and this time it made contact with Ryuji Gohda's blade. In a normal world, they would have clashed for a few seconds, but this was a fight between magic and mortality. Kanon's blade sliced through Ryuji Gohda's metallic stick, cutting it in half.

Kanon let himself get confident for a moment, which was stupid because Ryuji Gohda wasn't even fazed! He grabbed Kanon by the neck and shoved him against the wall! He began strangling the boy when someone grabbed his arm.

"You didn't forget about me, did you?" said Shannon. She swung a kick into Ryuji Gohda's face and, with his grip loosened, Kanon launched his little body into the man's chest. Ryuji Gohda launched backwards and lay on his back. Shannon the picked up the two halves of the sword he had dropped.

"Come, come, try to remember..." she muttered and the sword remembered the form it took previously. Then, she held it over Ryuji Gohda's limp self and swung it downward and stuck it into his chest!

Ryuji Gohda coughed.

"Very good... I can see why you're the supposed culprit of Umineko no Naku Koro ni!" said Ryuji Gohda. "But you're forgetting one thing."

"What?"

"THE RULES!"

Despite his injuries, Ryuji Gohda stood up. Any pain he should have suffered through Kanon's attacks were nullified by the intensity of his testosterone. Then, an incredible force caused by him being Ryuji Gohda caused the two servants to fall on their backs.

"Did ya forget? It's already been decided who the culprit of this story is... ME! Ryuji Gohda! Decided the moment I shot up those money grubbers! And you know the rule..."

Ryuji Gohda took the sword out of his chest. He was wounded now, but being wounded was something he was familiar with. He then gripped the sword tightly and thrust it forward! The blade impaled both Shannon and Kanon at once!

"There can only be one culprit!"

TO BE CONTINUED!