A/N: THIS IS THE TRULY M RATED CHAPTER IN THIS STORY. Lemons of course, and some content regarding mental health that some people may find triggering. Not for the faint of heart, please don't read if you're easily upset. Don't do something you KNOW will upset you...move on and be happy :)
It felt like forever when he finally spoke. The waiting had much of my bravery dissipating, and I couldn't help but feel grateful that I was not forced to look at him while he contemplated my words.
I almost screamed when I felt his lips on my ear.
"Keep going...show me what else you're... hiding." His teeth grazed my ear, and that time I really did yelp.
Almost all my trepidation returned...the next logical step would be my browser history...which showed the evidence of my extensive pornographic search the night before.
Oh lord...none of them were even GOOD...at least my bookmarks were somewhat worth the humiliation.
I felt so dirty. Never in my life had I ever felt so utterly filthy. He must have known it too, because he just kept on twisting that humiliation knife.
"My my MY...what, do we have, heeeree-uh..." There it was again, that fucking growl. I burned with both a mixture of arousal and shame.
"Which...which one do you want me to open?" Despite my embarrassment, my shoulders were slightly slumped. If he wanted to reenact any of these, my death AND the sex were gonna suck.
Wait...WHAT?
That fucking edible man, making me think some real crazy shit. That was definitely it.
His lips were back at my ear.
"Which ah...one is your, favouri-te." Another shiver shot up my spine.
"They, uh...none. They're all terrible, actually." I worried momentarily he'd think I was lying, but the laugh he barked out actually seemed genuine.
"Ohhh, you poor poor baby...I guess I'll just have to give you ah..." I felt his gloved hand move the hair off the nape of my neck, oh so gently. The motion caused my entire body to break out in goosebumps. He lightly bit my ear again.
"...a, uh, better, visual to work with, hm?"
The sudden absence of his heat distracted me momentarily, so I didn't right away comprehend the meaning behind his words until his weight disappeared from my bed.
A...better visual? Did he mean...
Oh, God...
I twisted my head to look at him, though I didn't have to strain much. He was walking, slowly, to the head of my bed, watching me. I was reminded of a wolf circling its prey, and not quite out of fear, my hand tightened on the part of the duvet covering my chest.
The other pushed rather obviously and lewdly into my lap.
He grinned darkly, then leaned in and snagged the laptop, setting it back on the night table.
"Definitely don't want this getting damaged, hm?"
No...I certainly didn't. That was a $3000 laptop, and if it broke, I was not gonna be able to afford another one. But the fact that he actually seemed...genuinely concerned for the welfare of my laptop? Why the fuck did he seem to care about it so much?
Here he was, having broken into some woman's apartment, dressed like - or at this point, who knew, maybe he really was - The Joker, and he was concerned about keeping my laptop safe? I nearly laughed.
Nearly.
The look he was giving me was most certainly not encouraging laughter.
Another shaky exhale escaped me, this time sounding suspiciously like a whimper.
His tongue flicked out as he stood there, hunched forward, like he was about to spring. He cracked his neck to the side, and when he leveled his eyes to stare at me full on, I literally felt a fucking gush flow out of me.
Okay, what in the fucking FUCK was wrong with me?
It's not you. I tried to remind myself. It's the edible.
"I'm uh...gonna need you to, ah, get rid of that." He nodded to the duvet, my only protection between me and him. I gulped.
"Um...what?"
Another side look. Another gush.
"Do you reaaaaalllly wannna make me repeat myself?" His voice was gravelly, and the underlying threat that bubbled beneath his words made it very clear to me that no, no I did not.
I licked my lips anxiously, and slowly, painfully, I uncurled my hand from around the duvet. It wasn't until then I realized how painfully tight my grip had been. Holy shit, that hurt. I shook my hand aggressively, eager to bring some blood back to it...before realizing my mistake. Shaking my hand had unwittingly shaken the duvet off and made my assets jiggle in a most interesting manner, if The Joker's look was anything to go by.
My nipples seemed to peak under his attention, and I scowled once again at my body's betrayal. My chagrin was short lived however, as he gripped the duvet, and simply ripped it off the bed. Though I did shriek, I managed to keep my arms from covering myself...somehow, I didn't think that would be a good idea.
I was sitting cross legged, and though I kept my eyes off his face, I could see him smirking at the view.
"Spread 'em."
A searing heat flashed through my body, and a very choked, half moan half whimper came out of me, very shakily.
"P-please..." I begged again, though honestly, at this point, I didn't quite know what I was begging for. His eyes, if possible, intensified.
Another gush. He smiled.
"My uh...new favourite word-uh."
I started trembling at this point. Uncontrollably trembling, like a fucking virgin. Who the bloody hell WAS this guy? How did he seem to know exactly what to say, how to act...everything he did felt so intentional, playing me like a damn fiddle. HOW did he know what ticked my boxes? Had he been...watching me?
The thought had me reflexively clenching, and his eyes snapped down to between my legs. His breath slightly hitched, and so did mine when I realized he saw that. He saw my fucking pussy clench.
The thought made me contract again.
I didn't mean to...I swear, I really didn't.
When his eyes snapped back to mine, I gasped at the sheer heat in them. When I still did not move, he slowly leaned on the bed, the knife very prominent in his fingers.
"Spread. NOW."
I cried out, very softly and quickly, but still...noticeably. Slowly, I straightened my legs, and though I didn't want to know, I still had to look. I had to make sure my shame was well founded.
OH...oh ya...it definitely was.
There was a veeeerrrrrrry wet stain beneath my crotch.
My face flamed. His tongue clicked.
"Ohhh doll face..." He tsked, and continued in a humiliatingly mocking tone, "just, what, are we supposed to do about that, hm?" A cocked eyebrow indicated he expected an answer.
Despite my trembling, and intense desire to thrust my hips at those words, I tried my best to act nonchalant.
"Erm...change the sheets, smoke a joint and pretend this never happened?" I wish my voice sounded a bit more confident, but the joke still seemed to land well. Maybe if I amused him enough, he wouldn't kill me.
Still chuckling, he took his jacket off, but left his gloves. When he started rolling his sleeves to the elbow...? Okay, yeah, I fucking drooled. Did he KNOW how unbelievably turned on this image made me? I guess my reaction was pretty obvious, because he cackled, loudly and maniacally for just a second.
"Ohh boy...you've really got it bad, huh?"
Yeah...yeah, you could fucking say that again, Joker.
Looking at him now, suddenly, a whole new fantasy started surfacing in my mind. Though reading about this particular kink in fan-fiction had always turned me on, it was never something I myself would have ever wanted to try in real life. However, looking at him in that moment, only one word was coming to mind: DADDY.
It sent a delightfully naughty thrill through my entire being, but I immediately pushed it away. Absolutely no way in HELL was I ever going to say that.
The bed dipped, and my breathing all but stopped when he crawled towards me. He grabbed my ankle, and though they were painful, I could tell the haphazard slices with the knife still in his fingertips were not done on purpose. In all honesty, I don't even think he fully realized it was still in his hand. He certainly didn't respond when I cried out in pain.
He roughly yanked me to the edge of the bed, keeping one knee on the mattress, the other foot planted firmly on the floor. He lifted the blade to my collar bone, tilting his head as he traced it.
"So much blank canvas to work with." He trailed the knife over my sternum, down my belly...
"Where..to..start..?" He moved the knife to my hipbone, and he froze.
"Well...my my. Looks like you got started without me." I breathed out a short laugh. He'd found the 'J K'.
The 'J K' I'd carved with a broken piece of glass into my hip when I was 14 years old. Though I'd initially carved his whole name, over time, the wounds and scars faded, leaving only two letters behind: JK
Kinda funny, if you thought about it.
I felt him trace the knife over the existing scars.
"I think though...you might need a uh...touch up." The knife went in, and I gasped.
It wasn't deep...no, no, not deep. Deep enough to hurt, sure, and most certainly deep enough to scar, but no, not deep enough to damage.
God, how I missed that feeling.
See, I used to cut...a LOT. But not like, normal cutting, on the wrist. Sure, it started out that way, but once I developed a taste for murderous, fictional characters, I started to get more...creative.
I wondered if he'd find the Freddy Krueger cuts on my leg. I'd done those with a pocketknife, four, beautiful slashes across the front of my shin. Only two of those remained...I could use a touch up there too.
I cried and moaned. Though I'd been extensively trained to handle pain as a submissive, this was...different. I'd been flogged, whipped, choked, tied up, suspended, gagged...but never cut. Only by my own hand.
This was...my God. This was something else.
I gripped the bed sheets, twisting them beneath me...I wanted to grab him, but I didn't dare interrupt. He was making art, after all...and he was working upside down, as I had carved the word on my hip to face me.
By the time he finished, there was a LOT of blood on my abdomen, much of it dripping down between my thigh and pussy. It always amazed me how much blood could be created from superficial wounds.
I lay there panting, basking in the massive endorphin rush. I'd stopped self-mutilating almost a decade ago, but that...fuck. A girl could absolutely get addicted to that.
His nasally voice broke through my reverie.
"Oh nooooo...it appears you've, ah...sprung a lea-k." His gloved hands ran up and down my thighs, smearing them with blood. When I focused on him, I saw he was staring at my drenched pussy, apparently deep in thought. He clucked his tongue.
"I uh, think I'm gonna have to plug it."
As the words slid out of his mouth, a gloved finger slid into me, immediately knuckle deep.
"OH-ngh-FUCK!" I reflexively lurched off the bed but was roughly pushed back down by his other hand, which was now firmly planted between my breasts.
"Stay...down." He growled, driving his hand in and out, almost painfully slow. "I told you...I'm fixing...your...leak."
He punctuated the words with particularly hard thrusts but did not pick up his pace.
I whimpered pathetically, relaxing my upper body in submission. My hips I continued to thrust; I'm not exactly sure when that started, but I was not about to stop...not when he was going so agonizingly slow.
Anxious for more stimulation, I fucked his hand shamelessly, no longer caring how wanton I may have appeared to him. I mean, was I really trying to impress the crazy jester who'd broken into my home?
"Ohh...oh ho ho…oh you are wet, baby girl."
I spasmed slightly around his hand, choking back a frustrated sob. Fuck, why was he going so slow? I needed...more...
"Please...please." The words were hardly a whisper, but the fucker heard them.
"Hmmm...sorry? What was...ah...that?" He drove it in hard on the last word, and I let the sob out that time.
"PLEASE! Please, more!" No matter how hard I bucked, he still maintained his slow pace.
His thumb slithered upwards and found my clit. Electricity shot through me.
"Mmmm...and uh, what do we have, here-uh?" Oh God, he was growling again.
That was it for me.
Violently, I melted over his hand, coming apart with a high keen. My back arched, but he kept me pinned, still driving his finger in and out, but STILL not speeding up. He slowly finger fucked me through my orgasm, his attention to my clit completely abandoned. Despite just coming, when I came down, I was left unsatiated, and panting with need.
Chuckling, he withdrew his finger, making a big show of holding it up to the light, his eyes flicking between it and my flaming face.
"Thee uh...problem, seems to have uh, gotten worse." He shook his head as he said this, as if he was disappointed. I buried my face in my hands. FUCK, he just couldn't resist embarrassing me.
"Ah ta ta ta ta...look at me." Though his tone was pleasant enough, I immediately brought my hands down so I could look at him.
He smirked, and very lightly growled.
"Good girl."
A clench from me was my response. The movement drew his eyes back down to my cunt.
"Sooo...fingers, don't seem to be ah...doing the trick." Another cluck of that damn tongue, before raising his blazing stare back to me.
"Any, uh...suggestions...on what to try nex-t?" He lowered his chin slightly towards his chest but kept his eyes on me. Gods, he looked delicious.
I whimpered. It was hard to muster any bravado when I was staring him in the face.
He smacked my thigh, hard.
"I uh...asked you a question."
My eyes snapped back into focus. The dangerous tone in his voice was very apparent, but his face was filled with barely concealed lust.
For the briefest of moments, I allowed my eyes to flicker down to the front of his pin striped pants. Though not large enough to scare the average woman, it was most certainly large enough to scare me. I wasn't exactly blessed with a lot of, shall we say...depth. It wasn't a challenge to reach my cervix with fingers, let alone an average sized cock.
Maybe not by much, but his dick? Definitely above average.
God help me though...I fucking wanted it. I really wanted it. And I mean, if that bulge was anything to go by...he wanted it too.
With that thought in mind, and the intense desire pulsating between my legs, I raised my eyes to his, a new sense of bravery settling over me.
"Your cock, Joker." I thrust myself up at him, a pleading tone to my still trembling voice. "I think - I want - you to try your cock."
For the briefest of moments, I think I surprised him again. The expression was so fleeting though, it was impossible to be sure. A dark, menacing smirk appeared on his face.
"Mmmm, now we're talking." I gasped at that. How many times I'd imagined that exact line spoken in a situation just like this. I heard his pants unzip, and my eyes fluttered shut, hardly able to believe what was about to happen.
"Ask me nicely." My breathing was so fast, and I could practically hear my heart in my ears. Was I really about to do this? Even before I could finish the thought, my eyes slid open, and the words were already leaving my mouth.
"Please...please Joker...please fuck me." The voice crack at the end of my sentence was like the final break of a dam. Nothing else mattered anymore...I was about to get fucked by The Joker. And obviously, he was JUST as turned on by this as me.
I went for broke.
"I think about you all the time...my pussy fucking drips and throbs constantly, because for fifteen fucking years I haven't been able to get you off my mind. You've been like a fucking parasite, embedding yourself in my brain, my body, and just wrecking it. I've tried others, but they don't compare...nothing has ever managed to soothe this fucking ache I have." My eyes were closed again, my back arching in response to my own words.
"I need you, Joker...I need you to fix me. Fuck me until I can't think anymore, fuck me until it hurts, rape me until I beg you to stop...please...get out of my fucking head." I was practically crying by the end of my outburst, my empty pussy clutching desperately at something, anything...but finding nothing.
Silence.
For the briefest of moments, I worried I went too far...perhaps I overestimated how aroused he was by this whole situation.
When I looked at him however, the sight that greeted me was the picture definition of unbridled arousal. The Joker was staring right at me, teeth bared, stroking himself. I was once again reminded of a wolf, just before it devours its prey. I bit my lip, and thrust my hips at him again, still feeling blood leak from my fresh wounds. His eyes cut down to my hip, then my cunt, then back to my face.
"Sorry...ah...what was that?" The words were spoken so tauntingly, I outright screamed in frustration.
"PLEASE! PLEASE Joker, please ple- FUCK!"
He entered me so quickly, and though I expected a violent, animalistic fucking, I was instead, once again, met with an agonizingly slow pace. The combination of pleasure and frustration had me mewling and clawing like a frantic kitten.
"What's wrong, beautiful?" His face was laced with fake concern, and he stopped moving all together. "Not...enough?"
I shook my head, eagerly pressing my hips up into him, desperate for him to move. I was well adjusted to his size...I just wanted to get fucked.
Hard.
He got off me quickly, and I cried out at the sudden loss of him inside me. Before I could get really upset though, he was back on top of me, and I felt something very familiar between my legs.
Oh God. The toy.
He slipped it inside, positioned it on my clit, and turned it on the lowest setting. Given how excited I already was, it took less than ten seconds and I'd already reached another peak. Instead of stopping, and allowing me to return to earth however, he turned the vibrations up a notch. My eyes widened in panic, and I started wriggling away from him.
To no avail, of course.
He grinned evilly at me.
"Let's see...just how quick your refractory period can be." God, that menacing tone...despite my sensitivity, I could already feel myself working towards another peak. He kept me pinned down, moving the vibrator gently. It took him less than a minute to find that one spot and FUCK the fireworks started again. No warning, just a hot, blistering orgasm forced out of my body. I screamed and writhed and convulsed, completely lost to the sensations wracking my body.
At this point, I started begging him to take it out. The stimulation was too much.
He nodded, and shushed me, and took it out. My relief however, lasted about a second before he shoved it back in, and turned it up another notch.
I wailed.
"PLEASE PLEASE stop, I c- I can't-" My thrashing was pointless. My God, he was so strong.
Fun fact about this toy; it's designed so you can get fucked while you use it. A fact he was clearly privy to, because all of a sudden he was forcing himself back inside me, the fit a lot snugger with him and the toy in there. Though if I'm being honest, between the blood and my own arousal...there was very little resistance to be had.
No slow movement this time. Nope. Now it was pure, unrestrained, bestial fucking.
I genuinely lost touch with reality. My eyes glazed, and though the overwhelming sensations were at this point more than borderline painful, I was powerless to stop them. My screams had yet to stop, though my voice had grown a great deal hoarser.
"PLEASE! Oh my God, please...I can't..." Even as I pleaded, I could feel that familiar pressure building again.
The Joker cackled, then growled in my ear,
"Ohhh, but I think you can, doll. I really fucking do." His one hand grabbed my wrists, pinning them to the bed above my head. His other fastened itself around my neck, and his fingers began to press. Though I was, for the briefest of moments, scared he was going to strangle me, I'd been choked enough times to know when someone wasn't doing it properly.
And…well...he was definitely doing it properly.
Between that, the vibrating, and the rough pounding in my cunt, I was done. My body seized, my toes curled, and every nerve in my being exploded.
All I remember is sensation. Complete and pure ecstasy, with no understanding of who or what was causing it. At one point, I wondered if I was dead and in heaven.
But no...after who knows how long, I could feel myself returning. A delicious, vibrating friction between my legs and a throbbing ache on my hip were the first things I noticed, followed by a blurry white face when I opened my eyes.
Holy fuck...the sensations were unreal.
As Joker fucked me back to earth, I still was figuring out what was happening as the oxygen returned to my brain. I had only begun registering that the sensations were slowly becoming more painful than pleasurable, when he finally stilled above me, finding his own release.
By the time I was completely conscience, and aware of my surroundings, he was already slipping his jacket back on. My chest heaved up and down, and I was unable to do anything but stare at him in awe.
"You...you choked me." I breathed, my entire body still tingling with the sensation. My clit, though sore, throbbed in satisfaction. He had removed the toy at some point, though I honestly didn't know when.
He smirked.
"And boy...did you love it." He waggled his eyebrows, and I actually laughed, the thrum of post orgasmic bliss coursing through my body.
He started towards my bedroom door, and I realized that he was just...leaving.
"W-wait!" I called, rolling onto my stomach, wincing as the bed met my hip and clit. I could feel the bed sheets stick to my bloody wound, so I sat up instead, giving him a good look at me. He paused, turning towards me, and before giving me a very satisfied once over, responded in an amused tone,
"Again? Already?"
My eyes widened, and I shook my head jerkily. For now, that ache was most definitely soothed.
He laughed at my expression.
"Soooo...? Don't tell me you've fallen in love after just one fucking." His tone dripped with condescension, yet my brain only seemed to care about one thing.
Just...one?
Did that mean this was a onetime thing? He wouldn't be back?
He was looking at me expectantly.
"No...no, I just...who are you? How did...how did you know...just, how?"
He just stared at me, his tongue pushing against his scars. The intensity of his gaze, despite my overstimulated body, still managed to illicit a reaction, albeit a small and subdued one.
Finally, he spoke.
"Be ah...careful whatcha wish for, dollface."
Then he was gone. I heard my front door slam, and that was the end of it. He was gone, and I was alive. Whether it was the edible, my post orgasm brain, or my brain still recovering from the lack of oxygen, it took me way too long to get up and lock the door.
But it wasn't because I wanted him to come back. No, no, it wasn't that at all...definitely not.
I walked shakily back to bed. Fuck, my legs felt like noodles. I sat down, and suddenly remembered my phone. It was exactly as I'd left it, on my night table, undisturbed for the entire situation. Not once did I ever think about calling the police while he attacked me.
Could I even really call it an attack?
Sighing, I rubbed my eyes, then my whole face. The sun was already rising, and I started feeling my lack of sleep creep in on me. I looked over to my other night table, and saw a Joker card, sitting so innocently on my laptop keyboard. Nothing on it, just a plain old Joker card. Something like a half sob, half laugh erupted from my throat, and I raked my hands through my hair, leaving them there in a disbelieving head clutch.
What the fuck just happened?
And more importantly...did I regret it? Did I...want it to happen again?
I shook the thought angrily out of my head. No, no definitely not. The only thing I wanted right now was sleep and sobriety. I was still brutally stoned, and the lack of sleep was certainly not going to help me make any decisions. For all I knew, I'd wake up and realize the whole thing was just a dream.
Without even cleaning myself up, I turned off all the lights, put on a sleeping mask, and tucked myself into my duvet, which I'd grabbed off the ground.
It was just a dream. None of it was real. It was all just a dream, and I'd wake up tomorrow totally blood free, and not a rape victim.
I ignored the small voice that kept telling me it wasn't rape. That I'd literally just had the most mind-bending sex I'd ever experienced. That I'd begged him for it.
The small voice was subdued. It was just a dream. It was all...just...a dream.
I finally drifted off, and the real dreamland welcomed me with open arms.
A/N: So there we have it! I do have plans to continue this story, not as a real story, but just writing different scenarios (ahem, fantasies, lol) that occur to me.
Please, be as critical as possible. I'm eager to improve my writing, and like most I find it difficult to perfect my own work. I'd love to hear any and all thoughts, no matter how negative they may be; please share them!
Love and peace, little Fruit Loops!
