The grey building was quiet as Lisanna and Alrace entered it. At that time of night, most people would either be sleeping, praying, or meditating. This meant that there were fewer people around to observe them. However, it also meant that any sounds they made were more likely to be heard, and if anyone else saw them then they might get suspicious after the recent events. Alrace was good at walking around unnoticed. Lisanna, not so much. She did her best to follow quietly behind him as he guided her to Natsu's room. She had no idea what to expect that night.

"Is Natsu in his room tonight?" Lisanna whispered.

"No, not tonight." Alrace answered without looking back. He continued guiding her towards the room. "But… t-there's something, something he left for you. I agreed to show you. Its important." His speech impediment was more pronounced than usual. Lisanna wondered if it was because he was nervous. She wanted to ask him what exactly she was going to see, but under the circumstances she decided to just wait. They would be there in just a few minutes.

After walking for several minutes, they turned a corner and finally came to Natsu's room. At least, it was his room in theory. In practice, it didn't seem like he actually spent a lot of time there, from what Lisanna had gathered. The door looked like any other door leading to any other room in the building. The only difference was that in this corridor there were no other rooms. Just Natsu's alone.

"This is it." Alrace said. He reached for the handle, and opened the door. Lisanna followed him inside, and they shut the door behind them.

Once inside, Lisanna looked around the room. It was a little bigger than hers. It was also sparsely decorated, unlike her own room. There was a bed, and a dresser, and a table with a couple chairs. Not much else. That didn't surprise her. From what she remembered, Natsu had never been big on decorating. In fact, the only physical possession he really seemed to care about was his scarf. Lisanna liked the fact that he was so practical in that regard. On the other hand, part of her was also disconcerted at his apparent lack of sentimentality.

"So, what did you want to show me?" Lisanna said. "Or I guess I should say, what did Natsu want to show me? This was his idea, right?"

Alrace nodded. "Yes." He then walked over towards the bed against the wall. He knelt down beside the bed. Lisanna just noticed that there was a small box with a latch on it there. She guessed that whatever she was supposed to see was in there. Alrace reached for the box and picked it up. He then put it down on the ground several feet away from the bed. To her surprise, he then started moving the bed. Or rather, he tried. He was quite feeble, and barely able to budge it.

"Um, do you need help?" Lisanna asked. Her pallid friend turned to her.

"Don't want to trouble you." He said.

"It's no trouble." She said. She walked over to the side of the bed, and grabbed the frame.

"Only need to move it a foot." He said weakly.

"Got it." She said. She began pushing, putting her weight into it. Instead of a foot, she pushed the bed halfway across the room.

"Whoops." She chuckled. "Sometimes I forget my own strength." She flexed an arm in a half joking manner.

"Must be good to be strong." Alrace said, his voice a mixture of awe and envy.

"It has its perks." She said. "So, where is…?"

"Here." he said. He grabbed at a wooden board on the floor, previously covered by the bed. He lifted it, revealing a hole underneath. He reached in, and pulled something out. It was a book. "This."

Lisanna looked at the book in confusion. "A book? Natsu wants me to read a book?"

Alrace held the book up, and grinned a little. "Not just a book. Journal."

"Oh, a journal." She said. "Wait, Natsu's journal? That's his?" He nodded to confirm. Lisanna was caught off guard by this. She never considered Natsu the type to keep a journal. She found it hard to imagine him sitting down and writing in one.

Alrace stood up and walked over to the table. He set the book down, but kept it closed. "I didn't read it. He said it's for you." He said. Lisanna looked at the book skeptically. She wondered what was in there. She walked over to the table, and reached for the journal. She flipped it open, and saw pages covered in words. She started flipping through pages. Not reading them, just seeing how much of the journal had been filled. She grew increasingly surprised as she continued turning pages and saw so many of them filled with ink. She closed the book again.

"Natsu wrote all this." She said, a little dazed from the surprise.

"He had a lot to tell you." Alrace said. "He said this was the only way."

Lisanna looked down at the journal on the table, its brownish leather cover cracking from obvious use. She ran her hand across it. She nodded slowly. "Okay. This must be really important then." She said. Natsu had specifically asked her to come to his room that night. She figured that he probably meant for her to read the journal that night. Even if he didn't, she was very curious. She had wanted to speak with him more for so long, and this might be the next best thing. She pulled out a chair and sat down. "I didn't have anything else planned tonight anyway."

Alrace shifted on his feet a little. "I can wait outside while y-you're reading. Make sure no one is coming."

"I'd prefer you stay. If you want to." She said. "I wouldn't mind the company." Alrace smiled a little.

"Yes. I'd like that." He said. He sat down in the other chair.

Lisanna looked down at the book, and put her hand on the cover. "Alright Natsu, what do you have to say?" she said. She opened the cover, opening to the first page of Natsu's journal. Upon looking at it, she immediately noticed that there were a few pages added on top of the regular journal pages. These pages looked like they came from somewhere else. She started reading.

Lisanna, Natsu here. You want to know what really happened? How we ended up here? I'll tell you. Its all here. Most of it, anyway. The stuff I can remember.

I first started writing this journal for myself. After I helped bring you back, I was… in a bad way. I couldn't think straight. Had trouble remembering some stuff. So, I started writing stuff down, so I could remember better. I wanted to keep everything straight in my head, especially since I was feeling confused about things. Like I said, I started off writing this for me. But later, it was more for you. I wanted to tell you everything, but couldn't. So, I wrote it here instead.

Look, I know I'm not good with words. I'm no writer. But I tried to get down everything that happened as best as I can remember. I even used a dictionary for a few parts.

Lisanna couldn't help smiling at reading that last part. "Natsu." She said. She resumed reading.

Anyway, its time to start talking about what happened. It all started several months ago, last year. Back when Erza was still alive…

At this point, Natsu began talking about the entire ordeal surrounding the Tower of Heaven. He provided a summarized version of the events, glossing over certain details. Erza's kidnapping, and team Fairy Tail going to rescue her. Jellal and his henchmen. Erza's confrontation with Jellal, followed by Natsu showing up and battling Jellal. And finally, the destruction of the tower, and the end of Erza Scarlet. Lisanna was not smiling anymore. She lifted her head from the page, and took a breath.

"Are you… all right?" Alrace asked.

"Yeah." Lisanna said. "This is … heavy. I just need a minute. I wasn't even there when this all happened. Poor Natsu. This must have been so hard for him." Alrace just nodded silently. Lisanna looked down at the pages again, and continued on.

That was how Erza died. But that's not the story I need to tell you. I'm going to tell you what happened after that. That story is all written down in the journal. After you read it, I don't know how you'll feel about me. But I have to tell you.

That was where the added pages ended. Lisanna put them aside, and turned to the first page of the journal. She took a deep breath. She then looked at Alrace a moment. "Okay, here we go." She said. She turned back to the opening page of Natsu's journal, and began reading.


Several months earlier, at the Tower of Heaven…

I watched Erza die that night. Right in front of me. I watched her swallowed up by that Etherion. I tried to reach out for her. I tried, but I couldn't reach her in time. I tried. And then…

The next thing I remember, I was in the water. I was moving around, reaching into the water, trying to find her. I didn't remember how I got there, and I didn't care. She had to be there, she just had to be. I was screaming her name, over and over again. Eventually I realized there were other people there too, but I didn't care about them. In that moment, there was only one person I cared about. But where was she? I had to find her, no matter what. I don't know how long I spent searching in the sea. My voice was going hoarse from screaming. But then, someone grabbed me. It was Gray.

"Natsu stop!" he said. "You're not going to find her."

I looked him dead in the eyes, furious. How dare he tell me to stop? It was Erza for gods' sake. "I can't stop. I have to find her. She's here. I know she is. I know-"

"She's dead, Natsu!" he screamed at me. "You can't find her, because she's dead." He looked furious too. And I think there were tears in his eyes. Somehow, I didn't care. I pulled back an arm, and punched him in the face, hard. He fell into the water. Lucy and Juvia, who were nearby, both rushed over to him.

"Gray!" Juvia said. She and Lucy both helped him up.

"Natsu, stop it!" Lucy said. Gray looked at me. He was pretty angry. So was I.

"You asshole." He growled at me. We all just stood there for a minute. It was dark, and cold, and all I could hear were the sound of the waves. I looked back at the tower, or least what used to be the tower. A lot of it had crumbled and fallen into the ocean. What was left was still glowing blue from the etherion. I turned to look the other direction, towards the beach. I saw three people standing in the water together: Millianna, Shô, and Wally. Erza's "friends". When they saw me looking, they all turned away. Couldn't even face me. They took her to the tower. Brought her to Jellal. If it wasn't for them…

I started walking in their direction. I walked right up to them. They looked nervous, tense. I walked on past them towards the beach. When I was walking to the beach, I think Lucy might have called after me. I don't know. I didn't care. I just wanted to get away from all of them, get away from that place. I felt sick to my stomach. I didn't want to speak to anyone. So, I just kept walking. I didn't know where I was going, just so long as it wasn't there.


I walked around outside for a while. I wanted to be alone. I didn't want to think though. I just felt numb. Probably a good thing. The only thing I could think, was that Erza had to still be alive. She couldn't be dead. It was impossible. Because if Erza really was dead, then nothing made sense anymore. But I couldn't see her, or hear her. She wasn't here. Where was she? Who took her away? I knew who took her…

I eventually wandered back to the guild. A bunch of people were outside. Macao, Wakaba, Cana, and a few others. It was still dark, and they didn't see me. I kept my distance, and watched them.

"We're going to have to hold a funeral." Macao said.

"Yeah, I know. I can't believe it." Wakaba said.

"I thought it might be a good idea to drink to her, but… somehow that just feels wrong." Cana said. "I'm definitely getting drunk tomorrow though."

"So, where did those three go?" Macao said. "You know, the ones who came back with Natsu's team."

"Oh, them." Wakaba said. "They left already."

"Yeah, I think they went down to the beach." Cana said.

"I'm not sad to see 'em go." Macao said. "They played a part in this whole thing, didn't they? Taking Erza…" Macao sounded like talking about it made him sick. I knew how he felt. The others didn't say anything. Just sat there looking sad. I didn't need to hear anymore. I walked away. This time I knew where I was going.


A short time later, I made it to the beach. I made sure to walk quickly. I got there in time to see the three of them. They had some kind of boat, apparently getting ready to go somewhere. They were all standing on the beach talking. I started walking towards them fast. At first, they didn't see me. But by the time I was a few yards away they did. The one guy, Shô, turned to look at me. It looked like he was going to say something, but he was interrupted by my fist to his mouth. He fell backwards onto the sand before he knew what hit him. The other two didn't like that.

"H-hey, what are you doing!?" Millianna said.

"Calm down, we don't want any trouble here." Wally said. "We were just leaving."

"You're not leaving unless I say so." I said. I didn't raise my voice, but I'm pretty sure I sounded pissed off. No, more than that. Something deeper than just anger.

"We don't want to be your enemies, meow." Millianna said. "Erza-" I cut her off before she could go on. I turned to her and clenched my fists. She took a step back.

"Don't you dare start that cutesy kitty shit with me." I growled at her. My hands ignited into fire.

"I'm sorry. We all are." Shô said that. He stood up, and got between me and Millianna. "We can't take back what happened." He said.

"Damn right." I said. "Erza is… gone because of you. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't tear you all apart right here and now." My flames grew hotter. Now Shô stepped back too.

"Do what you gotta do, but it's not gonna bring her back." Wally said. Now I turned to him, and grabbed him by the collar. I lifted him off the ground.

"Give him the book, Millianna." Shô said.

"The book?" she said. "You mean…"

"Yeah. Just give it to him."

I let go of Wally and looked at them. For a minute I felt more confused than angry. "Book? What the hell are you talking about?" I said. Millianna took a few steps closer. She pulled something out of her jacket and held it out to me.

"Here you go." She said. "You can have it."

I looked down at the book in her hands. It had a hard black cover. It also had weird symbols on it. I'm not a book reader or anything, but it looked like it would be worth something. After looking at it for a minute, I said, "What the hell do you expect me to do with this?"

"It belonged to jellal." Shô said. "It's a notebook. He wrote a lot of stuff down in it."

I just stood there, looking at them. "A notebook. You're giving me a notebook." Millianna started lowering her arms.

"It can help bring back Erza." Shô said. "Maybe."

"Is this a joke?" I said. "Because I'm not laughing."

"I'm serious." Shô said. "Jellal wanted to build the Tower of Heaven to resurrect someone: Zeref. But he looked into other methods too. He wrote them down in that book."

I gritted my teeth. "What makes you think I care…"

"You can use one of those methods." Shô said. "To bring Erza back. That's what you want, right?"

"We want her back too." Millianna said. I just stood there for a minute. I was trying to decide whether to start burning them or not. I wanted to… But if there was even a chance of getting Erza back…

"Why didn't Jellal use one of those other methods then?" I said.

"They didn't work." Millianna said. "Or, in some cases he said they would be impractical."

"They didn't work." I said. "But you think they can help Erza."

"They didn't work for the black wizard Zeref, but Erza is different from him." Millianna said. "Jellal said he needed something more powerful for Zeref. Erza was strong, but she wasn't like Zeref. Maybe it could work for her." She held out the book again. I looked down at it. I was so angry, and frustrated, and… fucked up inside. I wanted to hurt them. Maybe even do more than just hurt them. But… Maybe it could work for her.

"Erza." I whispered. I took the book from Millianna. I held it, and looked at it.

"So, what now?" Wally said. I didn't look at him. I was still staring at Jellal's book.

"Get the hell out of here." I said. "Just leave, and don't come back. I don't want to see any of you ever again." I turned around and started walking away, holding the book. I didn't know if I believed that book could help. At that point I still didn't fully believe Erza was dead. But something just told me to take it.

"Please bring her back." Millianna said behind me. I didn't answer her, and kept walking. I wanted to go home, and go to bed. I thought maybe when I woke up the next day this would all just be a bad dream, and everything would be back to normal.


When I went home that night, I actually went to sleep pretty fast. I guess I was worn out after everything that happened. But then, I woke up in the middle of the night. I think I was having a bad dream, but I can't remember. After a little while, I fell asleep again, and then woke up again just a short time later. Falling asleep was easy, staying asleep wasn't. I felt restless. I sat up in bed. It was still dark. I looked at Happy sleeping on the other side of the room. I hadn't spoken to him since… everything happened. I guess he came in some time after I did and just fell asleep. I got out of bed and stretched. I walked around a little. I didn't have anywhere to go, but I couldn't sleep either. I lit a candle close by. I lifted the mattress off my bed and pulled something out. It was Jellal's book. I hid it under there, but I'm not sure why. I didn't plan on keeping it a secret, but I hid it anyway. Whatever.

I sat down and opened it. There were a lot of pages, and a lot of stuff written on them. Lots of words, and there were also drawings, and diagrams and stuff. I skimmed the book. There were some spells in there. I never learned this kind of magic, so it was hard to understand a lot of it. I flipped through the pages some more, and found something weird. In one part of the book, there were a bunch of pages stuck together. I looked at them, and there was a hole in the middle of the pages, with something inside. It was a few small rocks. I grabbed them, and picked them up. They were a bunch of different colors. Not rocks I guess, but crystals or something. Purple, green, yellow, white. They were long, like fingers. It was weird. I put them on the table, and flipped through the book some more. I tried reading the words, but it was hard. I understood some of it, but a lot of it just felt like nonsense to me. I got annoyed and gave up. I put the crystals back and shoved the book back under my mattress.

"Natsu?" Happy said across the room. He had just woken up. "Natsu, I was looking for you earlier. I was worried. After Erza… After what happened, I didn't know where you were, or if you were okay."

"Its fine, Happy." I said. "I was just pissed off about stuff. I'll be fine."

"Really?" Happy said. "Cause if you want to talk, I'm right here. I know this is hard for everyone, me too."

I sat down in the bed, and started getting ready to try to sleep again. "Maybe we can talk later. I know we had a rough time at the tower. But everything will be okay when Erza comes back. You'll see." I laid down in the bed, grabbed a blanket, and closed my eyes. Happy didn't say anything, but I could feel him watching me. I'm pretty sure he wanted to say something, but he didn't. After a minute, I heard him lay down again too. Eventually, I fell asleep again.


The next day, I decided to go for a walk, clear my head. To tell the truth, I still felt like crap. I tried not to think about things. I thought that when I walked into Fairy Tail again, Erza would be there, just like before. I wanted to believe that was true. Maybe I even did a little. But for some reason, I didn't want to go to Fairy Tail right then. I'd do it later. So, I just walked around town.

After a while, I ended up outside of Lucy's apartment. I hadn't planned on seeing her, but since I was there, I figured I'd say hi. I stood outside the door of her building. Normally, I'd just go on in. This time, I just stood there. Maybe coming there wasn't a great idea. The door opened in front of me all of a sudden. It was Lucy. She looked at me, surprised.

"Oh, Natsu." She said. "I… how are you doing? I mean, are you okay?"

I looked at her, and shrugged. "Same as usual, I guess."

Lucy looked confused. "Same as usual?"

"Yeah. I thought we could go on a job together. Its been a little while. It doesn't have to be today. But maybe tomorrow we could swing by the guild and get the team, and find a job to do. You need rent money for your apartment, right? Yeah, I bet you do. Hey, are you hungry, want to get something to eat? I know this great restaurant nearby." I was talking a lot. I was smiling, and talking to her , same as always. She wasn't smiling. She looked… worried. Concerned is the word, I guess. And she looked more concerned the more I said.

"Natsu…" she said when I eventually stopped. "We're going to be holding a funeral in a few days. I'm just letting you know, in case you didn't hear. I'm sure you wouldn't want to miss it."

I looked at her, no real expression. "Funeral? Who died?"

Now Lucy looked really concerned. "Natsu, its Erza's funeral. I know its hard, but…"

"Erza's not dead." I said. Lucy looked at me like I was crazy.

"You saw her- " she started to say. I stepped closer to her.

"Erza. Isn't. Dead." I told her. We just stood there for a minute. I don't remember what I was feeling at that time. Lucy looked… upset? That's not the right word. Something like that.

"Natsu, are you feeling alright?" she said. "You don't look good." I took a step back, and rubbed my face.

"I didn't sleep well." I said.

"Well, that's not surprising." She said. "I think we're all feeling a little off right now. You should try to get some rest. And if you want someone to talk to, you can always come by the guild. Jobs can wait for right now."

I stood there, looking at the ground. I didn't say anything at first. I rubbed my hand across my hair. "Yeah, thanks." I said. "Talk to you later, Lucy." I turned and walked away without saying anything else.


I decided to go back home and look at that dumb book some more. I don't know why. I don't like reading. I never really understood people who like to sit around reading all day. If I had my face in a book all the time, I'd feel like I was missing out on stuff. But this was different. This book had answers. I just didn't know what questions to ask. I still wasn't ready to believe Erza was dead. But I knew she wasn't here. I wanted to find her, and this book was written by the guy who took her away. So, I started reading.

I've got to admit, after reading for just twenty minutes, my eyes and my brain started to hurt. I kept wanting to just throw it away and do something else. But, do what? I could go to the guild. But part of me knew what would happen if I did that. So, I kept reading. I understood bits and pieces of it. But other stuff I didn't get. Sometimes I would keep rereading the same couple pages over and over to try to understand. I was getting really frustrated.

"Hey Natsu, you want to go out and do something?" someone said. It startled me, and I looked up.

"Happy?" I said. He was standing there watching me.

"Who else would it be? You've been reading that book for hours, you know."

"I have?" I asked. I wasn't keeping track of the time.

"Yeah, its weird." He said. "You never read! What's going on?"

I put the book down, and rubbed my eyes. "Nothing. Just thought I'd try something different." Happy looked at me, with a weird look.

"Is this about… Erza?" he said.

I sat there for a moment. Then I said, "Okay, let's go fishing. Just don't ask me anymore questions about that stuff."

"Okay…" he said. "Whatever you say, Natsu. I'll get the poles then." He left, and I put the book away. Maybe I'd feel better after fishing. Maybe I just needed to do something normal.


I started doing normal stuff again. I went fishing with Happy, and then we went out to eat. I went to sleep that night, and didn't even touch that book again. Then the next day, I actually went back to the guild (didn't stay long though) and took a job. Not a team job. I just went solo. Figured it would help me get back in the swing of things. I finished the job, and at the end of the day, I went back home. It was all pretty normal stuff. Except I didn't enjoy any of it.

I didn't know what was wrong with me, but I knew I didn't feel like myself. Everything felt wrong. I didn't want to feel that way. At night, I sat in my bed again, holding the book. I opened it, and took out the crystals. What did they mean? I wished I could ask someone, someone smarter than me. But who? I had a hard time understanding the book, but one thing I did figure out was that the magic in this book wasn't like the magic we used at Fairy Tail. It looked a lot like the sort of stuff dark guilds would use. Not exactly the same, but… similar. My friends in Fairy Tail wouldn't like that. Lucy wouldn't like it, Happy wouldn't like it, and I know Gramps wouldn't like it. So, who the hell could I ask?

No one. I had to figure it out myself. This was something where I didn't have to fight anything, but it might be the hardest thing I ever had to do. I sat down with the book, and tried to forget about everything else. I felt like those crystals were probably important, I just wasn't sure how. I looked through the pages for an answer. Jellal talked about trying a bunch of different stuff to bring people back from the dead. The spells didn't work, or turned out to be hoaxes, or would be even harder to pull off than his big tower. Those three at the beach were telling the truth. I still didn't find what I was looking for though.

I spent the next couple days trying to figure it out, but no luck. I knew I wasn't smart enough for this. I was so frustrated I started growling, and then that turned into a yell. I just started yelling in the dark.

"Natsu, stop!" Happy said. Again, he came in without me noticing. "What's wrong, Natsu?" He must have thought I was nuts.

I looked over at him. "I don't know. Nothing. Everything."

"You seemed fine earlier." He said. "I thought you were doing a little better. Maybe you should talk to someone."

I sat there a minute, just staring at the wall. Then I said, "No, I just need some sleep, that's all. I'll feel better in the morning."

"If you say so." He said. "You know tomorrow's the funeral, right?" When he said that, I felt something cold in my heart. I didn't say anything though. I just laid down and closed my eyes. Again, Happy was watching me, but eventually laid down too.


The day of the funeral. I was hoping I would find an answer before that day. If I did, then it would be like this was all just a bad dream, and I had woken up. But with them actually having a funeral for her, and saying goodbye to her… It made it real.

I remember it was raining that day. Cold, hard rain. Usually that wouldn't bother me. But why did it have to rain that day? I didn't want to go to the funeral. But I also couldn't stand the thought of them having the funeral for her. It felt wrong to me. It meant they were putting her to rest for good, and I couldn't accept that. I needed her back. We all did. So, I went to the funeral. And then things got ugly.


Lisanna read Natsu's account of what had happened at Erza's funeral. How Fairy Tail had gathered to pay their respects. How Natsu had interrupted, and started yelling and disrupting things. How several people had had to restrain him as he railed against the funeral, or more accurately what it represented. Lisanna couldn't help feeling disappointed at reading this.

She understood why Natsu reacted that way. He had complicated emotions that he obviously didn't know how to deal with. But it still made her sad to know that he had done that at a close friend's funeral, and inadvertently hurt several other friends in the process.

"Natsu…" Lisanna said. As disappointed as she was with him, there was also a part of her that wanted to comfort him, and hold him. She sighed.

"Hard to read?" Alrace said. Lisanna looked up at him.

"Oh, it's just…" she said.

"Heavy?" he said.

"Yeah. Natsu always was very emotional. Its actually one of the things I've always liked about him. But sometimes he can be too impulsive, act without thinking." She looked back down at the journal. There was still a lot left.

"Alright, let's get back to it." She said.


After the funeral, I started walking. Running actually. I went back home. I'd been trying so hard to deny Erza's death. But seeing the funeral, that statue, everyone crying over her. I kept saying she couldn't be dead, but I didn't really believe it. I was angry at them for making me face it like that. I knew that Happy would be back soon, and would want to talk to me. But I didn't want to talk to him, or anyone else. I went over to the bed and grabbed the book. I packed a bag with a few things, and I ran out of the house. I didn't know where I was going, I was just going on instinct.

So, I ran. I ran hard in the rain. The book was protected by the bag. Besides, it survived the ocean, so a little rain wouldn't hurt it. Probably had a spell on it or something. After running for a while, I eventually came to a building. Or, what used to be a building. I looked up at it, and it turns out I ran to the old Phantom Lord building. I wasn't planning on it, but there I was. It hadn't been torn down or repaired, so the remains were still just left around. I walked inside. Like I said, a lot of it had been destroyed. There was still some shelter from the rain though. I sat in a corner, and rested for a few minutes. Now what? If no one was going to help me before, then they sure as hell weren't going to now.

"I'll save you, Erza." I said. "I haven't given up." After what happened earlier, I felt more determined than ever. I knew my brains weren't my strong suit, but I wasn't going to let that stop me. I'll just keep beating my brain with the words in the book until they finally sink in. That's what I decided.

I opened the book, and put it down on the floor. I took the crystals out and put them aside again. I looked through the pages for hours. It was starting to make a little more sense. But even when I understood something it didn't seem to help much. Jellal found a bunch of dead ends, and I was getting annoyed. Further into the book, I saw something weird. It was instructions for something. Not a spell, something else. And there were weird marks on the page. Shaped sort of like the crystals. I thought that was weird. Reading around it, the colored crystals seemed to match up to each shape on the page. I tried picking up the crystals and putting them all on the page, fitting in the shapes. I waited a minute. Nothing happened. Figures it wouldn't be that easy.

I went back and read again. I needed to draw a bunch of symbols around the book. At least, I thought that was what it was saying. So, I did. I drew a bunch of magic shapes in a circle around the book. I put the crystals back. I waited again. I think the crystals glowed a little, but I wasn't sure. It might have just been the light. I put my head in my hands. I started growling again. Why was this so hard? I really didn't want to give up on this.

Hello? I heard someone say. I looked up. I didn't see anyone around. Might have been my imagination.

Hello, can you hear me? I heard it again. I still didn't see anyone.

I can feel you. You're far away. The voice said. I stood up.

"Who's there? Who are you?" I said. I put my guard up quickly. For a second, it didn't answer. And then…

I can hear you. The voice sounded surprised. Usually they can hear me, but I can't hear them. You must be pretty powerful.

"And who the hell are you?" I said. The voice sounded pretty young, maybe a girl.

My name is Seraiisa. I… We need your help.

"Yeah, well I'm Natsu… You said you need my help? I'm the one who needs help here, kid." I looked down, at the book. The crystals were definitely glowing. "Hey, are you the one these crystal things called? Is that what this does?"

Crystals? I didn't hear her for a minute after that.

"Hey, you there?" I said.

Yeah. Those crystals might be like a beacon. You used a magic ritual, right?

"Yeah, in a book written by Jellal. You know him? The book has a bunch of stuff in it about bringing back the dead."

I don't know Jellal. Never heard of him. But if the book has stuff about resurrections… She was starting to sound further away, quieter.

"Yeah, that's right. I… need help. Someone I care about died. A friend. I want her back. Can you help?"

I think we can, yeah. I could barely hear her now.

"You think?"

Natsu, I can't keep this up for much longer, it's taking too much power over this distance.

"Can you help or not?"

We can, but first you need to help us. We need you to-

She suddenly stopped talking. "Hey, are you there?" I said. No answer. "Hey!" The crystals weren't glowing anymore. I was alone again. I slumped down to the floor. Then, I punched a hole in the floor. "So close." I said. I felt really frustrated again. I'd get another chance pretty soon though.


I went to sleep, but kept tossing and turning all night. As soon as it was light out, I got up and tried using the crystals again. No answer. I hadn't gotten enough sleep, and I felt tired and angry. This was hard. But I wasn't going to give up. I couldn't, not on Erza. I tried a few more times that day. Still no luck. I tried finding other things to do to distract myself. But after a little while I would just start thinking about the book and the girl's voice again.

While all this was going on I was still hanging out at the ruined Phantom Lord building. I guess I knew that people in Fairy Tail were probably wondering where I was, but I didn't care at that point. Besides, after what happened at the funeral maybe some of them were glad I wasn't there. I did feel bad about not telling Happy, but I had to do this alone.

That night, I still hadn't been able to contact anyone again. The book was open, the crystals were there, but they wouldn't glow. I was sitting in a corner eating some bread I had bought. Normally I'd eat more, but I wasn't very hungry.

Natsu? Are you there? I heard it in my head. I stopped what I was doing, and looked over at the book. The crystals were glowing again. I shot up to my feet, and walked over to the book.

"Where the hell have you been?" I said.

I told you, talking with you like this takes a lot of power. It's hard.

"Whatever. You said you needed something from me. What is it?"

We need you to free us.

"Who's us?"

Me and my family. We're trapped here, have been for a very long time. We really need help.

"Where are you?"

I… She didn't say anything for a minute.

"Hey, are you still there?" I raised my voice, because I thought I'd lost her again. But she spoke up again.

I'm here. We're in a place that should by many miles from where you are. I think it's called Bosco now.

"You're in Bosco?"

Yeah, it should be on the border with your country. Look, there's a spell, a curse, keeping us trapped. You need to come here and break the curse, let us out.

"Fine, I'll get there as soon as I can. I can leave tonight."

Woah, hold on. Don't you want to know how to break the curse? Plus, you'll need some stuff to bring your friend back.

I was feeling impatient. I didn't want to wait, but if I needed to…

"Fine, what do I need?"

First, the curse, what's keeping us here. The solution to letting us out is… a contradiction.

"A what?"

Fury, and compassion. Arrogance, and humility. Selfishness, and selflessness. All these things in one.

I was getting annoyed again. "Are you reading me poetry or something?"

This is just what I know about the curse. Sorry I can't be more helpful there. As for your friend, I'll tell you what you need. Her voice was starting to fade again.

"Hurry up and tell me. I don't want to wait another day." She told me what to do.


A little while later, I was at the cemetery outside Kardia Cathedral. It was still the middle of the night, and it was still raining. It was cold, but I didn't care. I walked in, looking for Erza's grave. Wasn't hard to find, it was the one with the big statue. When I saw it, it turned out someone else decided to visit the grave. Not just someone, it was Gray. I crouched down behind a big headstone. I wasn't afraid of him seeing me. I just didn't want to have to explain anything, or talk to anyone. Especially Gray. So, I just sat there, and decided I'd wait for him to leave. He was talking to someone though. I peeked around to see who it was. I didn't see anyone else there. He was talking to himself. Or Erza's grave, I guess.

"Gramps was right, it'll never be the same without you." He said. "You were the heart of us all, keeping us all together." It sounded like he was drunk. "Without you, what kind of team do we have? Stupid Natsu, Happy the little cat, and… Lucy. That's no team."

I just sat there and groaned. I didn't want to listen to this. I wondered how long he was going to take. It turns out, he spent over half an hour rambling on and spilling his guts. It was getting harder to understand what he was saying the longer it went on. Finally, he left. I got up, soaked now, and walked over to Erza's grave.

This was the first time I had really gotten a good look at it. It was pretty big, and probably expensive. I'm not going to say she didn't deserve it. I looked down at the dirt over her grave. There wasn't much left of her. But they managed to find a few things… Anyway, I needed "consecrated earth", and… something else. I really don't want to get any more specific. But I did the best I could. I reached down at the ground. It was practically mud. I couldn't carry it or dig through it. Damnit, I'd have to wait a little longer. I decided to come back the next night. Then, I'd get ready to leave for Bosco.


The next day, I decided to go back home. I figured Happy was wondering where I was, and it was good to talk to someone again. Besides that little girl. I didn't tell Happy I'd be going away again soon. We decided to go see Lucy, have a talk with her. It was pretty normal. Nothing exciting happened. Well… there was one thing. I could swear I could hear something. The girl… or something else. I don't know. Sometimes I would just hear things. Maybe I was going nuts. The next day was going to be the Fantasia thing. I said I'd go, so I would do it, and then I'd leave. I felt like I didn't want the funeral to be the last time I saw everyone before I left.

Anyway, I eventually went back to the cemetery, without Happy of course. No rain, or people around this time. I stood at Erza's grave, preparing to do what I had to do. Just before I did, I thought of something. I looked over to another part of the cemetery. Without thinking about it, I ran over. I stopped at another grave. Lisanna Strauss. I stood there for a couple minutes. Erza wasn't the first one I lost. Before her, there was Lisanna. Lisanna's death still hurt me. It had been a while since she died. I tried not to dwell on it, but most days I still thought about her. How could I bring Erza back, and leave Lisanna like this? I knew what I had to do. I was going to bring Erza back to life. And I decided I was going to do the same thing for you, Lisanna.


I went back to the Phantom Lord ruins that night. I was going to use the crystals to tell them I was coming. But before I could…

Hi Natsu. You got the stuff?

I looked around, a little confused. "Yeah. But I didn't set up the crystals. How are you…?"

We're developing a connection, silly. Or, maybe I'm just more in tune with you now. Either way, I can talk to you more easily now.

I didn't say anything at first. And then, "Change of plans. We're bringing back two people, not one."

Two? You only said… Fine, whatever. We'll figure it out. Just hurry. We've only got a few weeks, at the most.

"Why? What's going to happen after a few weeks?"

You'll miss your chance. And we'll have to wait a long time before we get another chance. You'll probably be dead by then. Trust me, there's a limited window, here.

A few weeks. I was going to have to get to Bosco and find them in just a few weeks… Fine. Whatever it took. I'd make it work, somehow. "Alright, but there's something I need to do tomorrow. Then I can leave."

There's no time for that. You need to hurry.

"Hey look, I've got to get a train ticket and stuff anyway. I don't do good with trains, so that shows how determined I am to do this. Just let me take care of something, and then I'll go. I'll be in Bosco soon." The girl didn't say anything at first. Maybe she didn't like my answer.

I can't force you to move faster. I just hope you make it in time.

"I will."

We'll be looking forward to meeting you, Natsu Dragneel. This last part didn't sound like the little girl. It sounded like an adult woman. I didn't remember mentioning my last name. After that, I got the feeling she was gone. Or they were, or whatever. I was tired of that mind talking stuff anyway. I decided to go back home to sleep that night. It would be the last time I would sleep in my own home for a while. Maybe ever.


Lisanna turned another page in the journal, poring over Natsu's thoughts. She paused, and rubbed her eyes from fatigue. She had been reading for a while at that point. She never would have expected Natsu to actually be able to write a coherent narrative like that, even if he was just recounting things that had actually happened. "I'll read a little more, and then I want to take a break." She said.

"You could take the journal with you, and finish it later." Alrace said.

"I think its best I read it tonight. Besides, I don't really want to wait to read the rest of it. Its not like I'm reading a novel here. This is important."

Alrace nodded, accepting her answer. Lisanna then resumed reading the journal. She read about the day of the Fantasia event. She read about Natsu's conversation with Makarov in an alleyway, and how negatively Makarov reacted to what Natsu said. About Laxus trying to take over the guild, and putting everyone in danger to do so. Natsu's fight with Bickslow, and then Natsu (along with a few others) battling Laxus himself. And then Freed. Freed Justine, who fell into a coma after helping to take down Laxus' thunder palace. Natsu was already torn up about Erza, and Freed's fate pushed Natsu further over the edge.

Natsu then wrote about the aftermath, and the somber mood at the guild. Lucy asked to talk to him that night, and he agreed. They had an intense conversation, which ended with Natsu leaving Lucy, and Fairy Tail, behind. I plan to come back someday Lucy. And everything will be better. You'll see. His parting words to her. Lisanna couldn't help but feel a little bad for Lucy. She seemed so distraught.

Finally, Natsu left to take a train. He had booked a ticket early in the day. Natsu wandered through Magnolia towards the train station, and his commentary had become more sparse by this point. His overall mood seemed darker. Lisanna felt increasingly uneasy. She put the book down again, and stopped reading.

Lisanna pushed the chair back from the table, while stretching and yawning. She looked up at the ceiling, while cracking her knuckles.

"Are we done here?" Alrace asked. Lisanna didn't turn to look at him. She continued looking up at the ceiling.

"No." she said. "I'm just… taking a break. I feel like I'll need it before reading the rest."

Alrace nodded. "That's okay. I… I brought food." He reached into a handbag, and took out some basic but edible food for them to eat. It had been wrapped to keep it fresh. He offered some to her. She looked at it and smiled.

"Thank you." She said. She unwrapped the food. "It looks good." This wasn't exactly true. It looked like food, but it didn't really look good. But Alrace smiled, appreciating her words. As they ate, Lisanna wondered what she was going to read about next. She was very curious, but also a little afraid of reading something that might change her opinion of Natsu. For the moment, she decided not to dwell on that, and just tried to enjoy the food.