If you were to ask any teenager about their opinion on the show called Total Drama, they'd most likely tell you that it's one of the best reality shows they had ever seen. They'd tell you that the show was so dramatic, they would sometimes wonder if the show was scripted all along.

Well, that would make them partially right about one thing.

Total Drama was no reality show.


"CUT!"

"What?" a muscular boy with piercings and a green mohawk protested. "I'm pretty sure I did exactly what you had told me to do!"

The director sighed. "No Duncan. You're supposed to say your lines like you mean them. And you're definitely not supposed to smile while delivering your lines. You are playing a short tempered delinquent, not a cheerleader."

Duncan sighed. "Fine. I guess so."

"Good. I'm going to go and check on the other sets. I just hope Lindsay and Trenton aren't fighting again. You guys can take a break in the meantime." the director got off her chair and exited the set.

"At this rate," a tall, blond boy wearing a cowboy hat, scoffed, venom in his eyes. "We're going to be here for days before we get to my part."

"Shove it, Geoffrey." Duncan scowled. "At least I'm trying!"

"At least I'm trying!" Geoffrey mockingly repeated with a sickly sweet false smile before returning to his normal scowl. "God, you're such a dork!"

"Calm down guys. There's no need to fight!" a girl said.

Duncan and Geoffrey both burst into laughter, Duncan's of pure joy and Geoffrey's condescending.

"Ironic isn't it. This is coming from you of all people, Eva." Geoffrey said. "I mean, you're the one who's supposed to be picking fights, right?"

The girl fiddled with her hair. "I know, I know. I just wish I could have gotten the animal lover role." she then sighs. "Too bad he got it." she gestured towards a tall, muscular, black boy who was currently threatening to beat up a shorter brown-haired boy.

"Uh oh. Looks like DJ's gonna beat up Tyler. We should try to stop him!" Duncan said worriedly.

"If you ask me, Tyler deserves it." a blonde girl nonchalantly said, while leaning against a wall. She had her arms crossed indignantly. "He just thinks he's sooo smart, doesn't he?"

"I second that notion." Geoff said, his comfortable sneer replaced with an even scarier smile.

"He may be a sarcastic jerk, Bridgette. But that doesn't mean we should promote violence." Eva tried to explain.

"Save it." Bridgette interrupted her. "My face is paining enough from all the smiling I'm being forced to do. I don't need a headache to top it all."

Eva sighed. This was just a normal day at the studio. The ones that weren't normal...she tried not to think about those.


"There is no way I'm going to kiss this...this...thing!" a black-haired boy snarled, while arguing with the head director.

"Oh come on Trent!" a pale girl with blue streaks in her black hair whined. "Let's just get this over with!"

"I wasn't talking to you!" Trent snaps. "And it's Trenton. I only go by Trent on this show, Gwendolyn." he spat the last word out as if it meant something really bad. The girl's eyes filled up with tears and she ran away, her sobs echoing through the set.

The head director sighed wearily. She had by now gotten used to such behaviour. Ignoring her son, she walked on to find two girls standing by one of the sets.

"OMG Beth! You totally nailed it!" a raven-haired Asian girl squealed.

"Thanks Heather! You totally did too!" the other girl squealed in synchronization with Heather. "I almost believed you were evil for a minute!"

The head director smiled. Only a few of the actors got along. The step sisters, Elizabeth and Heather were some of the rare rays of sunshine in the studio. They were inseparable and always encouraged each other to do better. The scenes involving those two were always the easiest and fastest to shoot. She only wished the others were like them too.

"Oh, hi there Mrs. Smiths!" Heather happily waved at the head director. "How's it going?"

Mrs. Smiths just shook her head. "Horribly. Trenton is refusing to cooperate, Eva is having trouble acting angry all the time, Noah is having trouble remembering all the snarky one-liners we gave him and Duncan is just not able to get into the delinquent role. And that's just for starters."

Beth looked at her curiously. "I've always kind of wondered why we aren't portraying who we really are? Maybe it will be easier for everyone that way? I mean, almost everyone is playing the exact opposite of who they really are!"

She looked them in the eyes. They noticed large black circles under her eyes.

"Exactly what I proposed," she admitted. "But the producers demanded we do the casting based on looks. They said, and I quote "There is no way we can have a tall and muscular bookworm and a blonde nerd! It just doesn't fit the stereotype!"

She sighed wearily and headed out of the studio. "Anyway girls," She called out. "Good job today. You can go early, you've earned it."

"Thanks Mrs. Smiths!" they said in unison.

Suddenly, Gwen burst past them, still crying. Trenton roughly pushed the girls aside and stormed after Gwen.

"Stupid fangirl." he muttered under his breath. "Can't even do one thing right."

He then bumped into a boy wearing a red tracksuit.

"Watch who you bump into, nerd!" Trenton snarled.

"I was watching." the boy, Tyler said without a hint of any emotion. "That's why I specifically bumped into you."

Trenton grabbed Tyler by his shirt and pulled him close enough for him to see the rage in his eyes.

"Listen," he said in an eerily calm voice. "I'm having a bad enough day because of that stupid, annoying little girl. If you want to stay out of trouble, I suggest you stay out of my way."

Tyler did not respond. Satisfied, Trenton let go of his shirt and after roughly pushing him aside, started looking for Gwen.

"If that girl is the reason I forfeit my pay," he yelled loud enough for the entire studio to hear him. "So help me, she won't even have a body left to bury."


Kathryn dipped her feet into the tranquil water. Finally, finally, she got some peace. She knew it wouldn't be for very long, however. Her hunch was proved right when she heard her sadist of a cousin, Sadie, call out to her.

"Hey Katie! Quit playing in the baby pool and get here immediately!"

She groaned. Ever since they had started shooting for Total Drama, Sadie had taken extra special care to make sure she made her life absolute hell.

"What do you want, sadist- I mean Sadie?" she asked.

Sadie's eyes narrowed. "Give them back!"

Kathryn was confused. "Give what back?"

"My earrings! Give them back now!"

"Bu-but I didn't take them, Sadie! I'm telling you the truth!" Katie protested.

Sadie huffed. "Yeah, right! You're telling the truth. Just like the time my necklace went missing and appeared in your purse, right?"

"Sadie, I swear! That wasn't me!" Katie said, dangerously close to tears.

While they argued, a hispanic girl, Courtney, casually walked past them, whistling, and silently dropped a pair of silver earrings into Kathryn's purse. She smirked.

"I saw what you did." a handsome young man pointed his finger at her. "Give it back to Sadie and apologise immediately!"

"Justin!" Courtney acted pleasantly surprised, although her heart was hammering on the inside.

Curse the pretty boy. She thought. Ruined all the fun.

"Justin! How nice to see you!" She feigned innocence. "What's up?"

He didn't reply and went over to Kathryn's purse. He pulled out a pair of earrings and went over to the bickering girls. Courtney silently slipped away.

"I believe these belong to you?"

Sadie gasped with delight. "My earrings! Thank you so much, Justin!" She then shot a nasty glare at her cousin. "I bet you found them in her purse."

"I did actually, but it was Courtney who planted them there. Katie is at no fault." He said, beaming at Kathryn. She reciprocated his smile.

Sadie noticed this, jealously. She thanked Justin and left, but not before pushing Kathryn into the pool.


After getting out of his fake bandages and wiping off the makeup that was used to make him look like he had gotten a black eye, Cody changed into his normal black jeans and black aviator jacket. He passed by a mirror on his way out of the changing rooms and wistfully stared into it. Everyday since the shooting had started, he would count down the days till when could finally dye his hair black again. He hated his naturally brown hair, but was forced to keep it that way until the shooting was completed.

"Out of the way, loser!" a blonde girl wearing a small tube top and a short skirt demanded impatiently. She had her back-length hair left open and tons of makeup on, as opposed to the natural, tomboyish look she had in the show.

"There's a lot of space to walk around, Bridgette." Cody said in a monotonous voice, eyebrow raised.

"Ugh." Bridgette groaned. "I'd rather die than be caught within a five-mile radius near one of you goth losers."

"Eh." Cody shrugged. "If that's the case, I'm not going anywhere. Death would suit you better."


Leshawna put her arm around her friend as she sobbed. She was one of the lucky ones, to have gotten a role that actually matched her personality.

"And-And then he cornered me in the changing rooms and threatened to hurt me if I told anyone."

Leshawna's nostrils flared. "Oh no he did NOT just do that." She rolled up her sleeves. "I'm glad you told me, Gwen. He is going to pay for that!"

Gwen wiped her tears and shifted uncomfortably on the bench. "N-No Leshawna. There's no need to do that."

She was too late, however. Leshawna had already stormed off. Gwen sighed and went to the changing rooms, keeping a wary eye out for her persecutor. She wiped off her makeup, revealing perfectly tan skin and changed into her normal pink sweater and purple skirt.

Next time, She thought. I'm not going to choose my crush based on looks alone.


"I'm just not able to remember my lines! I don't get how you do it." A scrawny boy complained to his friend.

"I'm confused as to how you aren't able to, since you barely have any lines." His friend replied with barely any enthusiasm, not even booking up from her book.

"I'm not even able to deliver them properly." The boy ranted on, not even listening to his friend. "I always end up laughing." He then crossed his arms and pouted. "I hate my role."

The girl looked up from her book. "Believe me," She said, adjusting her glasses. "I would do anything to have your role. Unfortunately, since I'm blonde and look "pretty", I get stuck with the brain-dead fashionista role. Do you even understand how hard it is for me to act like that?"

The boy just continued with his tirade. "I wish I could have gotten Geoffrey's role, Linds. This is so unfair."

Lindsay shook her head. "That's just how life is, Noah."


"Mooooom!" Trenton whined. "That idiot, Leshawna punched me in the eye! Do something!"

"No." Mrs. Smiths said shortly. "You've had this coming for a very long time."

"But look!" He continued. "She gave me a black eye and made my nose bleed. Change her role to an intern! O-Or make her get eliminated first! Anything! Just do me a favour once!"

The director stared at his son. He wasn't even an exceptional actor. He had only gotten a role in Total Drama because of her.

"I don't suppose getting you into this show in the first place was a favour?"

"Yeah, but-"

"No buts," She interrupted him. "You started this, you'd better end this. Or as you pointed out, I can always change your role to an intern or get you eliminated much earlier."

Trenton groaned. He walked out of the director's room and was startled to see half of the cast standing there, presumably overhearing his conversation.

"What do you want now?" He demanded. No one answered, though a few stifled giggles could be heard. He rolled his eyes and headed out of the studio. All he wanted to do now was rush home and shred a couple of pillows into bits with his teeth. He was done with the day.

"Hey Trenton!" A voice called out, saying the last word out as if it meant something bad.

He turned around to see Gwen give him the finger.

"Just so you know," Gwen said, rather calmly. "I'm totally over you. Congrats. You definitely won't be having any stupid, annoying little fangirls after you anymore."

Trenton turned around without a word and slammed the door in her face.


So that ends my first oneshot. It was fun writing my favourite characters as downright jerks, especially Trent and Geoff.