Milkshake


Metal glowered from where he sat, the glowing glare of his red eyes piercing into the Mega Meh Burger Milkshake as Sonic slowly and loudly slurped it. If glares could set fire to things, Metal's would have vaporized the blasted little wooden cup and the liquid inside— foam, straw, and all. What was so great about this milkshake anyway? It was all processed sugar, whipped cream and, if he had read the list of ingredients right, blended Meh Burger burger.

Finally Sonic put the cup down, wiping his mouth with a gloved hand. His eyebrow was lifted, green eyes focusing on the badnik sitting next to him. "Metal, are you giving my milkshake the stink-eye?"

"What gave you that impression?" Metal asked, carefully keeping his voice steady. He continued to glare at the cup. Sonic waved his hand toward his face, unimpressed, as though to prove his point.

"Well, you look like you're about to murder it. If that's even possible."

The robot's eyes narrowed. "So what if I'm, as you put it, giving this milkshake 'the stink-eye?' Of what concern is it to you?"

"C'moooonnn, just tell me what the problem is!"

"The problem is— is your indecent slurping." Metal's processors internally groaned with the pathetic excuse. It was too late to take it back now, so he might as well play it for all it was worth. "It is grating to my audio receptors."

"Yeah right." Sonic snorted, rolling his eyes. "You sure you're not just jealous of my milkshake?"

The bottom of Metal's optical screen flushed bright red, and his eyes flicked from side to side to make sure no one else heard that. No one was paying them any mind, too busy eating their own food. Except for Dave— he was clearly horrified. The kid covered his ears as he rushed back to the counter.

Metal focused his gaze back on Sonic, determined to keep him from discovering the actual truth of why he was looking at the milkshake like one would look at a moldy lump of bread.

"That milkshake is a curse to all things culinary."

"Reeealllly? I dare you to make a better one then."

"… That milkshake is slowly killing you, Sonic. It is filled to the brim with processed junk and Chaos knows what else. I have every reason to glare at it."

"Pffft, you're gonna try to pull that card now?" Sonic stared at him, amused and yet still miffed at the badnik's answer. "Eggman couldn't even kill me when he was actually trying to. What makes you think one milkshake is going to take me down?"

"… I don't like the cup. It is ugly."

"…"

Silence stretched out between them.

"The cup is brown," Sonic pointed out.

"Brown is— well, it is not a good color," Metal said hastily.

Sonic frowned. He was wearing brown.

"How do you know it is not poisoned? Perhaps I am scanning it to make sure it is clean of all possible toxins." Metal added in a lower voice, "Aside from the actual beverage itself."

Sonic closed his eyes, deliberately breathing slowly and heavily. "Deep breath," he muttered. "Deep breath." When he looked at Metal again, he asked, "Can you just be honest with me for two seconds? Please?"

Metal glowered at the table, unable to maintain eye contact. "I…"

Sonic waited.

"I do not understand why you bring me here," Metal said. "I cannot consume sustenance like you do."

"Metal, I… I didn't think…"

"I suppose I'm the one at fault here. I should have told you sooner that… this was bothering me." Metal paused. "Although I am not sorry I cannot taste that burger milkshake of yours—"

"Uh-uh! Mega Meh Burger Milkshake," Sonic corrected.

"You were not calling it that five minutes ago." He did not give the hedgehog time to retort. "Although I am not sorry cannot taste that particular item, I do find… it… difficult to watch other people eat without wanting do so myself."

Sonic hummed, chin resting on one hand and the other in his lap. He slid it forward, taking Metal's hand into his own. "Maybe we can talk to Tails and Egghead, see if the two of them can geek something up for you?"

"I'm going to ignore your massacre of grammar in that single sentence alone," Metal declared. "The Doctor and I have already discussed this on more than one occasion. Unfortunately, the technology to accurately detect flavors will not exist anytime soon. That is not even including the programming necessary to even perceive and interpret flavors." His head dropped, eyes focusing on their intertwined hands.

"We're never gonna know for sure if we don't keep trying," Sonic said. He curled his fingers underneath Metal's chin and tilted his head back up. Their eyes met again. "And I'll be there with you every step of the way. I promise."

Metal simply stared.

"Okay?" Sonic prompted, voice soft but firm.

"… very well," Metal spoke quietly. "I… we can try."

Sonic smiled gently. "Now that's the spirit." They stared at each other a moment longer, and Metal continued to relish in the sensation of his complement's hand on his, on the fingers lovingly resting on his chin. And then a mischievous smile spread across Sonic's lips.

Metal instantly grew wary. He knew that look. "Sonic…" he began warningly. For a nanosecond, he felt Sonic's touch leave. It was back again before he could fully process what was happening, and he felt something being smeared across his titanium muzzle. He stared at Sonic's face, red irises shrunken with shock. Suddenly a mirror invaded his field of vision, and he was met with the reflection of his own face. A crudely drawn mouth was squiggled across his shiny snout, the product of a black marker.

Metal lifted one hand, curling his talons around the top of the mirror and pushing it down. His narrowed eyes met Sonic's. A shrill, indignant beep left the badnik, and Sonic's already present grin grew 38.9% wider.

"Catch me if you can," Sonic said slyly.

He let go of the mirror and in a burst of blue, he was gone, a trail of sand spraying and an overturned chair in his wake. Metal's iris twitched. "Oh, I will catch you alright." He too was gone in an instant. His chair tumbled back, and crashed loudly onto the floor.

Dave scowled at the mess the two had left behind. "They didn't even pay for that milkshake…"