The next morning after breakfast, Augustín caught up with Bruno, who had been asked to make a house call. The smaller man was mumbling to himself, twiddling his fingers and taking deep, slow breaths, deliberately trying to reduce his heart rate.
Augustín slapped a hand onto his shoulder, pulling a yelp of surprise from him.
"Good morning, hermano, where you off to?"
Bruno looked up at the man. The man who's daughter he had begun to think about in very un-platonic ways instead of sleeping. His sisters husband.
The both of them would probably have his throat if they knew.
"Esteban wanted to know if his Abuelo is going to make it to his granddaughter's wedding. I'm really not looking forward to this meeting."
The taller man laughed and shrugged.
"They've come to accept your prophecies. If he didn't want possible bad news, he shouldn't have asked."
Bruno raised his eyebrows and nodded, before Augustín spoke again. His tone was quieter and a bit more sober.
"I thought you were worried about your feelings for my daughter. "
Bruno suddenly stopped walking and stumbled against a separator, stone wall. He leaned heavy against it with his palms, feeling like he may lose his breakfast at any moment.
Sweat began to drip down his face and his belly flopped angrily. He could feel his mouth begin to water as his throat tightened and he focused on breathing, willing himself to stay calm. It was true, and he had been found out. And by her parents of all people!
Don't vomit. Don't vomit. Don't vomit.
Augustín came up beside him and leaned against the wall, his legs crossed at the ankles as he slid his hands into his pockets.
"Calm down okay? I'm not mad, I promise. In fact, Julieta and I wanted to let you know that we completely support you. As long as Mirabel does anyway. If she feels the same way about you, that you feel about her, we'll 100% back you up."
Bruno glanced up between his curls, his stomach still churning but his mouth had quit watering. He slowly stood up straight and looked the other man in the eye. He was smiling calmly. Affectionately. He was being serious.
Bruno now felt a strained sort of grip in his chest. Hope maybe? His emotions had been in a complete upheaval the last few days, and he didn't know if his heart could handle much more.
"I don't understand. "
His brother in law smiled, giving a slight shrug.
"She's a woman now, as much as I would like for her to remain my little girl. And whatever she chooses, her mami and I will always support her. IF she does love you, that's her choice, and we're at peace with that."
Bruno went about his day in a cynical fog after that, shopping for dinner supplies for Julieta, and having a hard time focusing on prophecies. His hope slowly built as it began to get late, and he tried to plan on how he would tell her.
He had fallen in love with her, hadn't he? He just didn't want to admit it because he was afraid of hurting his family, so he was resigned to live in agony, alone with his feelings. He seemed to be good at that, wasn't he?
After dinner, he stood in his room, studying himself in the little mirror that Pepa had gifted him a couple of years ago. He was so pale, and he could feel his insides shaking. What if she rejected him? Or worse, what if she never wanted to speak to him again?
He finally smiled, realizing how tired he looked and how ridiculous it sounded to say that she would never want to speak to him again. Reject him? That was a high probability.
He finally took one final breath and he headed to Mirabel's room. It was now or never, and to be honest, his gut told him that never was looking pretty good.
As he was knocking on the door, he realized he could just have a vision about it. He waited a moment and when he heard her hum a response, he opened the door slowly, peeking in.
"Mirabel, can I talk to you for a minute?"
She was sitting at her desk, reading a book as the moonlight waved over her hair and bare shoulder. She was wearing the nightgown that Camilo had manifested, even down to one bare shoulder. She was chewing on her thumbnail as her eyes skimmed the pages quickly.
As soon as she heard the door opening, she began to stand up slowly, trying to reach the end of her paragraph. She finally set the book down and turned to smile at him, her hands clasped hehind her back. She looked so serene and beautiful as she walked toward him.
She reached out and took his hand, pulling him to her sofa so that they could sit comfortably. She pulled her feet up beneath herself and rested her cheek on her palm, her elbow on the furniture's low back, and she smiled at him.
"What's up Tio? I figure it must important, so out with it."
She poked him playfully and he stared at her warmly. He wanted so badly to touch her hair, her cheek, her hands. He finally began to speak after a few minutes, keeping his voice as steady as possible.
"Mirabel, there's something very important that I need to talk to you about. "
She blinked her eyes a few times before she scooted closer, placing a gentle hand on his cheek, her smile replaced with concern.
"Of course Tio, you know I always have time for my favorite person."
Her hands were so soft, sending thunderbolts of pleasure through his entire body. She was so close, touching him so gently. She leaned closer, moving her hand to his leg, seemingly unaware of where it was. He felt an electric charge course through his thigh, landing in his lower abdomen and causing his heart to leap.
He wanted to talk to her, he really did, but he couldn't find the words when she touched him like that. Was she doing it on purpose? Did she really feel the same way?
He gazed into her eyes, and all he saw was apprehension and tenderness. He turned towards her and laid his hand on her waist. She didn't seem to mind. His voice cracked.
"Mirabel, I..."
She moved just a bit, and he read the gesture as an invitation. He suddenly leaned forward, gently curling his fingers around her neck as his thumb brushed against her cheek.
His lips met hers then, in a moment of euphoric rapture. He pulled her body a little closer as he deepened the kiss, his soul soaring with pure bliss.
It didn't last however, as she pulled away from him a look of shock across her face as she studied him. She backed away slowly and stood up, pushing her hair back and clasping her hands close to her chest. She looked devistated.
He realized what had just happened and he stood quickly, his mind reeling. His joy dissolved in a moment, shattered like fragile glass to be replaced by horror and regret. What had he just done? He had read her gestures all wrong. She didn't care for him in that way and he had just...
He slowly backed away from her, wringing his hands so hard they burned. He stumbled over his words and she couldn't even look him in the eye. She seemed to be trying to find something, anything to focus on except for him.
"Mirabel, I'm so..."
She interrupted him, her voice soft and a bit sad.
"Maybe you should go."
He slowly stepped out, his feet and lungs both giving up on him at the same time. He couldn't breathe and his head began to spin. He turned to her to explain. To apologize. But he was met with a closed door.
He leaned against the door then, his forehead resting between his arms and he choked, his voice barely legible above the lump of emotion in his throat.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I hurt you. Mirabel, I..."
Again, he couldn't finish his sentence.. What was the point?
When he heard nothing at all from the other side of the door he turned around, the tears now falling freely as he tried hard to swallow some air. He hurried down the hall, forgetting about the family, about everything.
All he knew within this moment, was the fact that his heart was shattering, splintering and cracking. He felt like he may pass out, such was the pain that now called his chest home.
He stumbled as the lightheadedness and blurry vision hindered his footsteps.
When he finally reached the painting, he climbed behind it and tried to get to his room. He didn't even make it halfway before he collapsed, pounding the floor with his fists, again and again until he saw blood smeared on the floor boards.
His voice became hoarse as he tried hard to keep his cries of anguish as quiet as possible. He didn't need the family to hear him.
He mumbled over and over, like a mantra.
"I'm so sorry. I hurt you. I'm so sorry I hurt you. I wanted to love you. I tried. But I couldn't even do that right. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
He felt a tickle around his neck and he grabbed the rosary, the one he had worn since he was very little. He looked at the wooden cross, smoothed from years of rubbing it during prayer, polished and shiny. He suddenly felt a boiling rage rising up within him and he tore off the necklace, black beads rolling and bouncing in every direction.
He threw the pendant against the wall and he watched it crack in half, tossing splinters about, with a twisted and furious satisfaction.
He growled then and yanked on his hair before he shot a look of seething betrayal skyward.
"Even you're never there for me!"
He stomped his way to his room where he collected only what he needed and what would fit in the wayuu bag that Mirabel had given him. He then yanked his hood up, telling the rats to stay and, "look after Mirabel," and he made his way out the front door, making sure not to make a sound.
Once outside, he gently touched the houses cool walls as the tears began again, and he fought to smile.
"Adios Casita. I'm so sorry that I couldn't do more for you. Protect Mirabel, okay? Make sure she's always happy and safe. Take care of the family. I love you, Casita."
He pat her lovingly as the roof tiles clacked and creaked. He knew what she wanted, but he couldn't stay. All he was good for was hurting and disappointing the people he loved most. So the best thing for them, was for him to leave. For real this time. No more hiding.
He walked all night, running through the town and through the crack in the mountains. Once outside of the mountain range, he came to the edge of the rainbow River.
This was it. He would follow this river until he found another town. He was grateful that he had made the rats stay behind, he needed time to think and cry.
