Trigger Warning: Self Harm.
Thursday, November 26 2020 10:00 AM
The next morning Riley didn't want to wake up and didn't want to face her mom or Olivia.
Today she did not have school because the 12th graders are testing. Jesse and Noah were at school and Billie was home.
So Riley rolled out of bed and walked into her bathroom.
She looked under her hair care products and pulled out the razor that she hid from her mom and Olivia.
She sighed, then she rolled up her pants legs, and then she started cutting her thighs. She watched as the blood rolled down her leg and hit the floor.
20 minutes later she finally walked out of the bathroom fully dressed. She had on a pair of black sweatpants and a black sweatshirt. Then she took a deep breath and walked out of her room.
She walked upstairs with Rocky right behind her.
When she got upstairs she was not surprised to see Olivia and Riley sitting on the couch waiting for her.
"Oh good. You're awake. Now we can talk. Come sit." Amanda said.
"I rather stand." Riley said as she crossed her arms.
"Fine then. So where did you go last night?" Amanda asked
"I went with a friend to a party." Riley said
"Alright and what did you do at the party?" Olivia asked
"Danced. Hung out with friends." Riley replied simply
"Is that all?" Amanda questioned
"Yes, it's not like I was drinking or doing anything." Riley said
"Okay you didn't drink or drugs but you still made some very poor choices and Amanda and I talked about your consequences. So you are grounded for..."
"Hold up for one fucking minute. You can't ground me!" Riley said
"Oh yes I can." Olivia said very seriously.
"No you cant. I dont remember you becoming my mother. The only person you are in charge of is Noah, your son, not me." Riley said
"Riley, she is still an adult here. So no matter what she is also in charge of you too. You're grounded for three weeks. And while you are grounded you may not have your phone or your laptop. You can only use your laptop for school stuff only. Do you hear me?" Amanda said
"I hate you. You are the worst mother ever!" Riley yelled at Amanda before she ran downstairs and into her room after slamming the door.
Olivia sighed softly before she looked over at Amanda. She was almost in tears.
"Amanda." Olivia said as she tried to reach out for Amanda, but she pulled away.
"Dont." Amanda said as she just stood up and walked out of the house.
Olivia sighed softly as she ran her hand through her hair.
Olivia knows that she has to give Amanda and Riley time to themself before she goes and talks to them.
4:20 PM
It had been about six hours since Amanda left and Olivia was starting to worry about her.
Jesse, Billie, Liv, and Noah were at the kitchen table eating a snack.
"Mommy, where is mama?" Jesse asked
"Well mama went for a joy ride." Olivia said not knowing what to tell the six years old.
"Mama does that a lot." Jesse said
"What do you mean Jesse?" Olivia asked
"What Jesse meant is that mom would leave for a few hours after having a bad day. Sometimes she would go to a bar and go for a run, since she can't gambling anymore." Riley said from behind Olivia.
"Okay thank you for that information." Olivia said
Riley did not say anything, she just continued with what she was doing.
"What are you doing Riley?" Noah asked as he watched Riley moving around the kitchen.
"I'm going to make a mixed berry smoothie for a snack then I can go back to my room and study for a test." Riley said as she started making her smoothie.
At moment Jesse's face lit up.
"Can you make me one too please?" Jesse asked
"Sure, Jess." Riley said
"Yay." Jesse said as Riley passed her the smoothie. Then walking downstairs to her room.
10:00 AM
It has been 12 hours since Amanda left. Billie, Jesse, Noah, Riley, and the dogs were finally sleeping. Olivia was the only one up; she was waiting for Amanda to come home. When Amanda finally walked into the house she was relieved that Amanda was okay.
It did not take long for Amanda to realize that Olivia was sitting on the couch.
"How long have you been sitting there?" Amanda asked
"Not long." Olivia said as she walked over to Amanda.
"You made me worried sick. Where have you been?" Olivia asked
"I need time to myself for a while." Amanda said
"You were gone for twelve hours." Olivia said
"I know that but I just need time to myself." Amanda said
"And leaving for twelve hours not telling me where you were or anything was your way of being by yourself." Olivia said
"I'm sorry that I worried you, I just could not get Riley said out of my head." Amanda said
"You know that Riley did not mean that, Right?" Olivia asked
"Oh she did. I'm going to bed, it has been a long day." Amanda said
"Okay." Olivia said as she watched Amanda walk into the bedroom before walking into the bedroom herself.
"Good night, Amanda." Olivia said
"Night Liv." Amanda said
Friday, November 27 2020 1:00 AM
"Stay away from me! Don't do this... not again!"
"Stop... please, stop" Amanda was yelling in between hard breaths
"Get off of me." she kept repeating as her hands flailed around her.
"No!" Amanda screams as I bolt upright.
Amanda looked around and saw Rocky right next to her trying to wake up and Frannie was laying on the floor. Olivia was still sleeping or she thought she was. She could feel tears running down her cheeks.
Amanda gets out of the bed and walks out of the bedroom into the living room.
She sat down on the couch.
A few seconds later Amanda looked up and saw Olivia walking into the living room.
"I'm sorry Liv I didn't mean to wake you up," Amanda said
"You didn't wake me. Do you wanna talk about your nightmare?" Olivia asked as she sat down on the couch.
Amanda's breathing hitch in her throat and she shook her head vehemently.
Olivia took Amanda's hand and smoothed her thumbs over the backs of her hands to calm her.
"I am not going to make you talk to me, honey, but you're really upset and I think it might help if you did." Olivia reasoned, the rationality of it all upsetting Amanda further, and with no power to stop herself, she dipped her head when she started to cry softly.
"It's ok, sweetheart," Olivia said, continuing to stroke her thumbs across Amanda's knuckles. Trying to calm her down.
While Olivia was trying to calm down Amanda, Riley walked upstairs and into the kitchen.
Five minutes later Riley walked back into the living room with two cups of tea in her hand and handed one to Olivia.
"Give her this, it will help her calm down." Riley said as she walked back downstairs.
Olivia looked back at Amanda.
"Here, have a few sips. Slowly." Olivia said as she gave Amanda the cup of tea.
Amanda's breathing finally starts to calm down after about five minutes.
"How ya doing?" Olivia asks Amanda gently.
"Okay." Amanda said softly, still sipping the tea.
"Have you got any idea what triggered this tonight?" Olivia asked
"Nope." Amanda said as she took another sip of her tea.
"What is in that tea?"Olivia asked
"Green tea, dried lavender blossoms, dried chamomile blossoms and honey. It is one of my favorites." Amanda said
"Interesting. Do you wanna talk about the nightmare?" Olivia asks.
"No." Amanda said
"Okay then how about we try to get some sleep." Olivia said
"Okay." Amanda said as they walked into their bedroom.
They climbed into bed and Olivia opened her arms in an invitation to Amanda.
Amanda closes the very small gap between herself and Olivia. She pressed her face into Olivia's neck and she finally fell asleep.
Friday 6:20 AM
Amanda and Olivia woke up to hearing kids giggling.
"I wonder what they are up to." Olivia said
"Yeah me too." Amanda said as they got out of the bed.
They walked out of their room and into the kitchen. When they walked into the kitchen they were surprised to see Jesse, Noah, and Billie eating at the dining table and that Jesse and Noah were ready for school.
"Morning Mommy. Morning Mama." Jesse and Noah said at the same time when they finally noticed Amanda and Olivia.
"Morning sweethearts." Amanda said as she and Olivia kissed the kids on their forehead.
"Did you guys know that Riley is having a baby which means I'm going to be an auntie and that would make you and mommy grandmothers." Jesse said, jumping up and down.
Amanda and Olivia just looked at Jesse with a smile on their face.
"Riley made y'all breakfast." Noah told Amanda and Olivia.
"Where is Riley?" Olivia asked
"She is getting ready for school, I think." Noah said
"Did she eat?" Amanda asked
"Nope." Jesse said
"Okay." Amanda said as Riley walked into the kitchen.
Riley was wearing purple, silver, and white cheer uniforms. She also had on a pair of tights to cover her legs. Her hair was in a ponytail with a silver bow on it.
"Riley, could you do my hair like that please?" Jesse asked
"Nope, I don't have time." Riley said
"Oh." Jesse said looking sad.
"Riley do have time to do your hair Jesse." Amanda said and Jesse's face lit up.
"No, I don't." Riley said
"Yes you do, you don't start school till 7:40." Amanda said
"I know that, but I have things to do before that." Riley said
"No you don't, remember you're grounded for three weeks so you can't do whatever you have to do. Now come and eat." Olivia said
"Yeah no, I have to go." Riley said as she grabbed her backpack started walking to the door.
"Riley, Olivia just told you what to do." Amanda said
"And I don't take orders from Captain Benson. So if you don't mind I have a Student Council meeting at 6:40 and also a pep rally to get ready at 7:30. So bye." Riley said as she walked out of the door.
Amanda and Olivia just sighed. Amanda did not know why her daughter was acting out like this.
"Mama, why is Ry-Ry acting mean?" Jesse asked
"I don't know honey. I don't know." Amanda said as she drank her coffee.
"I miss Ry-Ry." Jesse said
"What do you mean Jesse?" Amanda asked
"She changed, she doesn't want to play with us anymore. And she acts weird." Jesse said
"I know sweetheart. Right now you should give Riley some space." Amanda said
"Okay." Jesse said
