Written after 12x05.
Callie was pissed. She was irate.
And she knew that she didn't really have a reason to be, but she was. Because Arizona'd had the gall to tell her that she still loved her and wanted her back.
Which was insane. And ridiculous. And unbearable. And Callie hadn't been able to think about anything else since. Which she didn't want to do. Thinking about Arizona was something she'd spent two years trying not to do.
And she'd been successful. She'd thrown herself into her work, she'd found Penny, and she'd focused on Sofia.
But she and Penny were no longer together, and now…she couldn't stop thinking about Arizona.
And wanting her. Which wasn't good.
She couldn't help but imagine a life with her again. And about how it might be…different this time. Better.
Because Arizona was different. They were both different. They had both grown and — in many ways — they didn't know each other anymore.
And they also did. God, Arizona knew her better than anyone. Still. And that terrified her.
So she was pissed. She was irate. Because Arizona still had a hold on her. Even after all this time.
It wasn't fair. It wasn't right.
And, now, when she closed her eyes, all she could see was her ex-wife's smile. And, suddenly, all she could think about was how much she wanted her.
Ugh.
Sofia was at the house with a sitter, and Callie just needed to get home. She would order them some pizza, give Sof a bath, put her to bed, and then sit on the couch with a bottle of wine and cry and mope and reflect.
Reflect on whether giving into Arizona, and into her own feelings, was worth it. Because it could be. Maybe. And maybe not. Because was trying again really worth it? Was potentially failing again worth it? Would it be better to try and maybe fail, or not to try at all and recover entirely sooner?
She walked towards the elevator, reaching down and pressing the button with a sigh. She just needed to get her ex-wife out of her head. She just needed to get it all…everything Arizona had said…out of her head.
The doors opened, and she stood stock-still as she waited for everyone to exit. When she turned back, only Arizona was still inside.
God dammit. Just her luck.
And, just as Callie caught sight of her ex-wife, the blonde's gaze landed on her. She could have sworn she saw Arizona gulp.
It was too late to turn back now, though. So, with trepidation, Callie stepped onto the elevator, her eyes locked with Arizona's.
"Hey," Callie whispered, quickly turning around to face away from her. What was she supposed to say? This was painful. All of it.
And what hurt most was knowing how painless it could all be. It hurt not to be with Arizona — especially now that she knew that Arizona wanted to be with her.
And so she could ameliorate the pain. It would be so easy. Give in. Let love win. Try again.
Anddddd, now she was rhyming. She was insane. The whole thing was making her crazy. She sounded like Dr. Seuss.
"Hey," Arizona murmured in response, trying to swallow the rock lodged in her esophagus. Was Callie never going to address what she said? She knew she should apologize, or take it back, or do something to make the woman she loved less uncomfortable, but she couldn't find it in her to do that.
Because she loved Callie. And she didn't regret putting it out there. No matter how much it hurt that her ex-wife hadn't responded in kind.
After a moment, Arizona breathed, "Calliope…" It was a soft, sad plea. She didn't know what she was asking for. To be acknowledged, maybe. For the elephant in the room to be acknowledged.
But before the word had even finished crossing her lips, Callie's mouth was on hers. And it wasn't gentle. She suddenly found herself shoved against the back wall of the elevator as Callie's body pushed against hers, caramel hands cradling her face to keep her exactly where she wanted her.
As if she needed to. Arizona was more than happy to oblige, a euphonious moan falling from her lips at the taste of the woman she loved. It had been so long.
Callie was bruising her lips, pouring something — anger, almost — into Arizona and drowning her in it as she voraciously kept prodding the blonde's mouth with her tongue — making it painstakingly obvious that she wanted to possess Arizona somehow. To hurt her. To swallow her whole.
Callie was pissed. How dare Arizona say she still loved her. How dare she make Callie still love her. Infinitely. Still.
As she kept their lips locked, Arizona eagerly reciprocating, Callie felt ivory hands come to rest on her hips. She expected the blonde to push her away, but instead, the smaller woman pulled her closer, changing their position so that the Callie's back suddenly hit the adjacent wall.
Her head dipped to wrap her lips around swollen pink ones, and she felt tears prick her eyes as Arizona pushed back — not with force, but with softness.
Arizona insistently slowed their kisses, tracing calming circles over Callie's sides as she attempted to turn her ex-wife's blatant anger into love and her pain into softness.
So much love and softness. Suddenly, it consumed the brunette. It was so sweet and tender that it almost hurt.
Because Callie had ached for this. As much as she hadn't let herself admit it, she had ached for only this.
And, god. So had Arizona.
Finally, they pulled away when they heard the beep indicating they were on the first floor and that the double doors would soon burst open.
Callie leaned back, her eyes never straying from her ex-wife's beautiful, beautiful face.
And, like Arizona, their love was too beautiful to hate. The last two minutes had proven that, once again.
The doors opened, and Arizona had the urge to run, because…what had just happened? And what did it mean? But her eyes were locked with those deep brown orbs that seemed to see through her, and she couldn't move. She wasn't sure she wanted to. "Callie?" she questioned meekly.
Callie exhaled heavily, deciding something. Then, she offered out her hand, palm to the floor.
Arizona looked at it in question. She was going to need words. And lots of them. Because she had told Callie she loved her, and Callie had ignored her. Until now, anyway.
"Come eat pizza with Sof and I," Callie explained, by way of asking Arizona to come home with her. Well, not home so much as to the house she lived in. Because she never felt more at home than when she was with Arizona.
Arizona's eyes widened. Wait. Did this mean…
Callie stepped out of the elevator, her hand still proffered. She licked her lips self-consciously, then attempted a shy smile. "Come on. We'll talk. Please?" She didn't feel like telling Arizona that she was still in love with her, too, in the middle of Grey-Sloan Freakin' Memorial Hospital. But she would say it. Later. She would say it. Because she felt it. Every bone in her body was overcome with love for Arizona.
Biting her lip, Arizona nodded, stepping forward and taking the hand that felt like home to her. As they strolled down the nearly empty hallway, she felt her heart finally slow. Callie had the ability to set fire to her entire being and the power to put it out — keeping her safe and calm. As they walked through the puddled parking lot, she offered, "I like pizza."
Callie grinned, squeezing the hand that seemed to fit perfectly in hers. This felt good. Sooo good. Because Arizona loved her, and she loved Arizona. Loving each other seemed to slow the world down. It made everything clear and calm, as if the universe itself wanted them together. As if they made the universe better just by existing as one.
"I like pizza, too."
