Arizona stopped short when she noticed that one other person was in the attendings' lounge: Callie. Damn it.
"Hi." She offered a soft smile.
Callie nodded towards her. "You done for the night, too?"
Arizona nodded, walking towards her the cubby that held her street clothes. It was easier to be around Callie when she didn't look at her. Looking at her just made Arizona want her. It made Arizona want her, and want her, and want her some more. The want never abated.
Especially that night. She'd had a long day, and — what she yearned for more than anything else — was Callie's arms around her. Her body ached for Callie.
Which was wrong. It was so wrong.
It had been two years since she'd felt Callie's skin on hers, after all. They purposefully kept from touching each other, knowing that it might lead to more. That it might remind them both how much they truly loved the other. And that would be unacceptable, because they weren't together. And they couldn't be. They'd failed. Their love alone hadn't been enough, and that couldn't change. Right?
"Arizona?" Callie prompted with uncertainty.
Arizona turned towards her, a question written on her face.
Before continuing, Callie chuckled self-consciously. She knew she was being ridiculous. She knew she shouldn't make the request she wanted to make. She knew she didn't have the right.
But even knowing that didn't stop her.
"I, um," she paused. Finally, she surrendered. "I had a long day."
Arizona exhaled an understanding breath. "Me, too." When she and Callie had been together, they would have spent the night eating pizza, drinking beer, and talking between delicious orgasms, but not anymore.
Arizona was going home alone, and Callie was going home to only Sofia.
Callie slowly nodded, buying herself time. How could she ask for what she needed? Did she even have the right to ask at all?
All she knew was that she yearned for Arizona's arms around her. She yearned for that and so much more.
Slowly, she felt tears sting her eyes as she reflected on everything. How had it all gone so wrong? Her life wasn't meant to turn out the way it had. It wasn't the way it was meant to be.
Because she and Arizona were meant to be. And they weren't together. Callie couldn't even touch her. She couldn't even ask Arizona to touch her.
"Callie?" Arizona questioned, suddenly overcome with terror. Why was Callie crying? She instinctively stepped towards her, wanting to wrap her into a hug but realizing she didn't have the right to.
She had once made Callie's body hers, but no more. She no longer had the right.
"Callie?" she intoned again, hesitantly placing her palm on a strong shoulder as a sign of comfort. "What's wrong?" It was more than a mere question. She was practically begging for answers. She couldn't stand to see Callie hurt. She'd never been able to stand it.
Callie released a shuddering breath. God. She couldn't help but admit the truth, with Arizona right there, touching her, and all around her. "I keep dreaming about you."
Arizona pulled back. That hadn't been what she'd expected to hear.
"About holding you," Callie continued. "About you holding me. And it's all I want, right now. It's the only thing I can think of that will get me through tonight."
Arizona's eyes bulged. Were they so well matched that they had the same thoughts? She and Callie had been full of misunderstandings for so long, but suddenly, they desired the same thing: something as simple as a hug.
"Okay," Arizona eagerly nodded a moment later, desperate to keep Callie from crying anymore. Her grasp tightened on Callie's shoulder. "Let me hold you, then."
"Wait…what?" Callie verbalized inarticulately. She must have been hallucinating. She must have been hearing things. She must have been.
Arizona rolled her eyes, but she did so sweetly. "Callie," she began, her voice a mixture of tenderness and exasperation. "It took months to get used to you no longer curled around me in sleep."
Callie raised her eyebrows.
"Sometimes," she continued, "I still wake up and reach for you." She paused, seeming to be lost in thought as her hand lightly trailed down Callie's strong arm.
Callie watched her pale face in silence, waiting for more. It had been so long since Arizona had been this honest with her. Years, maybe.
"But I still haven't been able to completely get used to not being able to reach for you after a long day," Arizona finally finished. "And to you not being there."
Slowly, Callie nodded. She understood that perhaps better than she should have. "I know."
"But I'm here now," Arizona decided. "And so are you."
Her meaning was clear, and Callie gently reached her hand towards a milky face, sweeping back a loose strand of golden hair. Even while the movement seemed effortless, her hand was shaking and hesitant.
It had been so long. It had been two years since she'd even shared such an intimate moment with Arizona. Doing so then felt…unfamiliar.
And it was unfamiliar, mostly, because it was so familiar. It was just right. It was a touch that felt like second-nature. One that felt as natural as breathing. And Callie hadn't felt that way with any other man or woman she'd seen since the divorce. She'd never felt such a sense of completeness with another human being.
She only felt complete with Arizona, which was perhaps why she so vehemently ached for her protective arms.
Arizona leaned into the caramel palm that had come to rest on her cheek, bringing her own hand up to cradle Callie's. She closed her eyes, wanting to focus all her senses on the single feeling of Callie's skin on hers. A lone tear fell from her eye.
"Hey," Callie breathed, wiping the tear away. "What's wrong?"
Arizona shook her head. She knew she shouldn't say it. She couldn't. She didn't have the right.
"Tell me," Callie insisted softly. Her thumb gently stroked a soft white cheek, and Arizona's eyes became hooded at the feeling.
Finally, Arizona forced her eyes open, boring them into responsive brown orbs. "I miss you, Calliope," she whispered. "Not just your hugs. All of you."
Callie's lips lifted into a sweet smile, while her heart took off in her chest. So she and Arizona really were on the same page. "I know. I miss you, too." And, seeing that Arizona was on the verge of collapse — with Callie not far behind her — she intoned, "We're going to hug now, okay?"
Arizona nodded eagerly, forcefully wiping the tears from her cheeks. She stepped forward, close enough for their breasts to touch.
Then, she stopped. She thought a hug had been all she had wanted, but it wasn't. She wanted more. She wanted so much more.
Callie had said she missed her, and then, Arizona wanted more. Perhaps Callie did, too.
She did. As Arizona stepped closer — into her space and against her — Callie's eyes fell on plump pink lips. She missed those lips, too.
And, immediately, she saw blue eyes darken as Arizona's gaze fell on her own lips. And then she couldn't move. Not really. She couldn't back away. She couldn't run towards the door — towards safety and surety. All she could do was bring her hands to Arizona's face, keeping the blonde from running away, either.
"Calliope…" Arizona pleaded, and then Callie's lips moved closer. So close. Only a breath away. "I love you," she exhaled, the words flowing directly into Callie's mouth and beelining for her heart.
"I know," Callie breathed in return, her sweet breath falling against Arizona's skin. "I love you, too."
At that, Arizona closed the distance entirely, tilting her head back and grabbing Callie by the waist, forcing the taller woman tightly against her smaller frame.
Callie whimpered at the sudden, overwhelming contact, a sob catching in her throat.
Arizona's body shuddered at the sound, and then her lips softened against Callie's, wanting to fill the brunette with every ounce of love she felt for her.
Full lips eagerly moved against hers, and Callie's hands moved down the blonde's small frame, insistently pulling Arizona's body as tightly against her as she could.
With their lips working together to recreate their love that was neglected but never forgotten, Callie and Arizona felt their hearts settle in their chests, slowing to an identical steady heartbeat.
Finally, Arizona pulled back, reverently cradling Callie's face in her hands. "I feel better," she breathed, her eyes staring directly into Callie's soul.
Callie let out a soft chuckle, her arms still wrapped tightly around Arizona. "Me, too," she whispered in return, lovingly gazing into those beautiful baby blues. "You make everything better."
