The Nerd Versus the P.I. Family
By Steampunk . Chuckster
A/N: Let me just say real quick that I'm exhausted. I appreciate you folks for coming in here whenever I post a chapter and saying kind things. I also want to thank those who leave me messages on tumblr as well. I don't find myself on there as often, but when I do go on and see your messages for me, it means a lot. Thanks! Hope you all enjoy this chapter. Hope it makes you smile during a time when smiling is kinda tough to manage for a litany of reasons.
Summary: Sarah Walker has uprooted her life, leaving her job with the LAPD and going it alone as a private investigator, all in the hopes it provides her with less dangerous stakes and a schedule she can control so that she can handle her most important job, raising her toddler, a bit easier. But when the single parent thinks her computer might've been targeted by a criminal, she has to request help from the unlikeliest of sources: The Buy More Nerd Herd.
Disclaimer: I do not own CHUCK, I do not own its characters, I am not making money from posting this.
"Hey, eyes on me. For just a second."
Chuck blinked and looked up at Carina. "Sure. Yeah. Sorry. I was…doing the transfer."
"I know you were. But there's a reason why I need you to destroy this thing, even…though it might be something the LAPD, or maybe if they need to be involved, the FBI, might be able to track. Help find out where it came from, or who it came from." Carina looked very uncomfortable suddenly, almost like this was something she had quite a few reservations about saying.
Chuck kept his gaze from straying back to the computer, as much as it wanted to. He had a job to finish, after all.
"Look, I need you to pulverize it because, um, well… Honestly? Shit, I'm telling you the truth." She looked at Sarah, almost as if needing some reassurance, and she must've gotten it from the other woman, because she continued. Apparently telling him the truth, whatever that happened to be. "The fact that my computer got hacked by these guys can't leave this room, Chuck. Nobody but the three of us knows. And that's how I need it to stay. Okay?"
Oh. Shit. "I see. So you don't want the LAPD to have this thing with all of your files on it."
"It'll get back to the DA, and when the DA finds out, I'll be in big trouble. To put it lightly."
"Chuck, Carina might lose her job."
He felt his insides go cold at that as he looked up at the redheaded lawyer, his brow furrowed. "Shit. You'd get fired for—? I mean, it isn't your fault. You work a case with big implications like this and you get targeted."
"The DA doesn't necessarily like that I'm still so focused on this case. If she knows it's also why our case files nearly got into the worst possible hands, I'm pretty sure I'd be job hunting tomorrow." Carina shrugged and crossed her arms, sitting on the edge of the desk.
He'd only met her a handful of times, but he had a feeling this much tension and seriousness wasn't really the norm for her.
So he said the thing he thought might ease some of her tension. "I'll handle this however you need me to handle it, okay? Whatever you need me to do, I'm your guy."
Carina arched an eyebrow and smirked. "Wow. That was pretty much exactly what I needed to hear. I see why my girl over here likes hanging around with you. It's buoying."
He sniffed in amusement and blushed, tugging on the hem of his jacket. "Yeah, well…I don't exactly want you losing your job. But—" Something struck him then. An idea. Right between his eyes. And he sat up straighter, in spite of being tired to his bones. "Hey, wait. You two would know better than me, so feel free to strike this idea down like the—" He stopped himself and cleared his throat, ducking his head. "Right. No metaphors. Uh, lemme rewind. Feel free to strike this idea down. Period. End of sentence."
He heard a quiet giggle from Sarah and he rolled the rickety chair back just a bit so that he could look at both of them.
"I can erase it first. Wipe it clean. You hand it over to the LAPD, say you caught it before it could grab anything, but you have no idea what in the hell it is, only that you didn't put it there. No files will be on it, so the extent of the damage that could've been done isn't as, you know, right in their face. So if it does get back to the DA, you aren't in as much trouble." He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. "Just an idea."
"It isn't terrible," Sarah chirped, glancing over at Carina. "Think it could work, Red?"
"See, the thing is…" He licked his lips thoughtfully. "There's a chance this could be a clue. Or it could at least set you on the right path towards getting to a clue, or clues, plural. It could lead you to someone, or some company, that might have answers. Have connections. I don't know. I'm spitballing."
"You watch a lot of movies, don't you?" Carina asked.
He blushed. "Too farfetched, huh?"
"I mean, you might watch a lot of movies," Sarah muttered with a wince. "But Carina, what if he's right?"
"They still have nothing but dead ends over the thing Dork Pod over here found on your laptop a few weeks ago. It led to jack squat."
"Nerd…Herd. It-It's not important," Chuck muttered, shaking his head and shutting his mouth as she gave him a look.
Chuck hadn't known that they'd only reached dead ends while trying to trace where that keystroke logger had come from. And it made sense that he wasn't read into it, because who was he, even? Whoever Sarah was working with at the LAPD had no idea who he was, or that he was there in that office at that very moment, still involved in this. And he imagined they wouldn't be all that pleased about his involvement either, considering Carina had them holed up in a seemingly abandoned freaking old-ass building at the moment to get this done.
And he found himself wishing he could take a crack at finding the fuckers who'd put the keystroke logger on Sarah's laptop. He wanted to take a crack at tracking this bad boy, too. Glancing back at the screen, he frowned deeply.
"Is that a thinking look? What are you thinking?" Carina prompted, reaching out to poke his shoulder.
"It is a thinking look," he admitted. But he didn't want to admit what he was thinking. So instead he said, "Whatever you do with this program, I'm wiping it clean. You can stand here and watch me do it. It'll take a second. Just so you know that I'm not…I dunno, playing any games."
Carina pursed her lips and arched a brow. "You realize I'd kick the shit outta your ass if you did play games, right?"
"Oh, absolutely, one hundred percent. And I'm sure it'd be extremely easy for you to do it, too. I have this…defense mechanism where I get on the ground and curl up into a ball and it's really, really ineffective. So…yeah." They both chuckled at that and he smiled, reaching up to scratch behind his ear shyly. "But that isn't the reason. I don't dabble in illegal stuff…" Anymore, he thought to himself with an inward wince. "And I'd never do that to anyone, let alone you. Either of you."
"Shit, you're charming," Carina groused. "How do you even stand it?" she asked Sarah teasingly.
"It isn't as difficult as you'd think," Sarah said with a softness that made his heart hammer against his ribcage. He tried to fight a blush but he knew he wasn't having much success.
"Wipe it," Carina said, rescuing him. "Erm. Please," she added, almost as an afterthought. It nearly made him snort. He wondered if she'd gotten a look from Sarah.
They watched as he wiped the program clean, erasing every last bit of the files from it. "Know what would really be fun? If I erased it, added a block into the programming, stuck it back onto your laptop, and let it slither around ineffectively until they sent someone to retrieve it again, annnnnd all the while you've got LAPD detectives keeping their eye on it. And BAM, it's a trap!" he growled in his best Admiral Ackbar impersonation.
He clicked away in the silence, not quite picking up on just how silent the room had gotten.
When he did finally get it, the tension seeping into the air around him, he oh so slowly lifted his gaze to Sarah first, then to Carina. They were gaping at one another. Sarah was the first one to snap out of it, spinning to face him, eyes wide.
"Chuck?" she said slowly. Calmly.
"Uh…yes?"
"That is…" She just shook her head, searching for words.
"What she's trying to say, geek boy, is that you're an evil genius."
Chuck blinked. "What? No, I-I thought that you don't want anyone knowing they got this thing onto your laptop. You might get fired."
Carina shook her head. "It occurred to my admittedly fried from sleep deprivation brain finally that this laptop?" She gestured to the one Chuck had in front of him. "Is the exact model of the one I use at home for non-work related stuff. Pictures, social media, illegally downloading and streaming trashy TV shows and my movies."
Chuck gasped. "For shame."
She snickered, crossing her arms. "What? I pay the five hundred and eighty seven dollars it takes to go to the damn movie theater these days, too, okay? Get off my ass, nerd. Like you don't do it?"
"I plead the fifth." He mimicked zipping his lips shut.
"Kids? Can we get back on task?" Sarah prompted. "Not that this convo isn't a blast… but what's the significance of the other computer being the same model?"
"They picked the wrong laptop. I can say they stuck this shit in my personal laptop instead of my work one, so they got nothing. They won't know the difference when they come back to pick it up, and I don't have to tell my boss or Mr. Tightwad at the LAPD."
Chuck snorted. He imagined there were quite a few tightwads in the LAPD, including the one he had to interact with himself thanks to that contract.
"They won't have to know the truth," Sarah added. "That's brilliant. And it covers your ass."
"Yeah, it fuckin' does," Carina mumbled, smirking. Then she gestured at him with a thrust of her chin. "So? How 'bout it? Can you do that?"
He grinned. "Pfft. Easy. I'll do you one better. Get me onto that personal laptop of yours and I'll stick some of your photos and downloaded episodes of trash TV and whatever else you're keeping on there onto the program so that it looks like it was gathering files from the laptop. If it comes back totally clean, it'll look suspicious when you hand it over to the LAPD for tracing."
"Even better. I don't have it with me here, it's at my apartment. But I can go and get it. You two just wait here…"
But before she could get much further than onto the other side of the desk, Sarah sprang after, her friend, snagging her by her wrist. "Hey, hey. Wait. Wait a second, Red. You realize what time it is, right? We've been here literally all night." She held her watch up for the other woman to see. "It's almost three in the God damn morning."
"Oof." Carina frowned. "Doesn't feel that late. I guess I got my second wind."
"Yeah, you took a marathon nap on the couch, but the rest of us were awake this whole time," Sarah drawled, amusement in her face, "And we're pretty tired." She glanced at Chuck unsurely. "I mean, I don't want to presume or anything. I shouldn't speak for you…"
Chuck shook his head. "Oh no I'm wrecked with exhaustion. This stuff keeps my eyes open, though," he said, gesturing to the computer.
It always had. He could hack all night long if he got into the groove, and he wouldn't snap out of it until Morgan crawled into his bedroom window and physically put himself in between Chuck and the computer. It was…pretty bad, once upon a time. And it had been a while since he'd had reason to get lost the way he had tonight. Morgan hadn't been here to keep tabs on him.
And Chuck realized as he glanced down at the desk that there were two empty water bottles and a mug of coffee, as well as an empty bag of trail mix. He hadn't even paid attention, but all of that must've gone into his body at some point, and he had a pretty good feeling about who had put it all into his hand without him even knowing it was happening.
It filled him with warmth as he looked back up at Sarah.
"See?" She'd already turned back to Carina, missing the melty look Chuck was throwing in her direction. "We have to call it a night, Carina. We can reconvene again, you can bring both of your computers, Chuck can work his magic… when all three of us have had some sleep." She turned back to Chuck, and by then he'd managed to fix his face better. He hoped. He was so tired, said face was a little numb if he was being honest. "The danger is gone for now, though, right?"
He nodded. "All of Carina's files are where they belong, on her laptop, and…" He reached down and popped the flash drive out of the slot on the side of the device. "This is empty. I-I mean, the flash drive isn't empty. It has this asshole program on it, but the program has been wiped. You're safe."
"So we can wait a few hours to finish the job, I think," Sarah said to Carina, even as she held his gaze. He saw it, and he felt it. She was grateful. And it made him want to leap up onto the desk in front of him and backflip off of it again.
"Fine. Even though I slept like a weakling, I'm pretty tired too honestly," the lawyer admitted, barely suppressing a yawn against the back of her hand. "Back here tomorrow night at nine?"
"Oh, no. No no." Sarah cut her palm through the air in front of her.
"Why not? It worked out fine this time."
"Yeah, it did. Because Max is with my mom and dad having a fun sleepover, but I can't do this two nights in a row," she explained, thrusting both hands out in front of her, palm up. "When I wake up in…however many hours I need not to feel like death, I'm getting him from his grandparents' house because I miss my kid." Chuck felt himself smiling at her even harder. "And I'm definitely not having my two year old who manages to find, like, every dangerous thing in every room if you leave him alone for even five minutes in this place."
"Oh God, who knows what lurks in this room alone?" Chuck added, pushing up to his feet and stretching. Carina glared a little. "It's a lovely room. Beautiful. Very clean. Modern. Definitely doesn't smell like there might be some mold somewhere, nor does it seem like it could potentially be a breeding ground for ghosts."
Sarah outright laughed, and Carina glared for maybe two seconds longer, before she cracked a grin as well. The grin broke and she laughed with her friend.
"Fine," Carina chuckled. "You two win. But you're a fuckin' weirdo," she said, pointing at Chuck.
"I'll own that," he chirped, shrugging as he moved over to grab his bag. He thrust the flash drive towards Carina. "Here. You keep that."
Carina snagged it and held it up. "Thanks. So what's the plan tomorrow?"
Sarah slipped her hand around Chuck's forearm then, squeezing, and he turned to look at her. She tilted her head in question. "Still never actually asked you if you're even free tomorrow night."
"Oh, I'm—Yeah, so, I live this wild and crazy life outside of the Buy More. I've got big plans so… I'm playing," he said quickly as they both gawked at him. "I-I don't have plans. Not tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after that. So."
Carina snorted as Sarah giggled, her fingers slipping down to fold wonderfully around his own fingers, and he held on tight.
"Where are we meeting then?"
The lawyer clapped her hands together. "Sarah's place. This guy knows how to get there, you don't have to even budge the little man, and I get to see him for the first time in, like, ugh, a century."
"It's been two days," Sarah groused.
"That's a century in me and Max time," Carina explained with a one shoulder shrug, her purse strap hanging from it.
They all gathered up their things, Chuck helping Sarah shrug into her coat, and as she sent him a look of thanks over her shoulder, she asked, "That work for you, Chuck?"
"It does. Yeah. Perfect."
The three of them trudged down the staircase together once Carina locked up, and Chuck found his legs were getting heavier and heavier, the more steps he descended. God, he just wanted his damn bed more than anything. And as Sarah sent him another look, something he couldn't quite read in her blue eyes, he decided maybe not more than anything.
As they wandered out of the building, Carina locking it securely and slipping the keys back in her purse, Chuck found he didn't want to walk away from this moment. There'd been something special that had happened tonight, he thought. Not just with him and Sarah, but he felt like maybe he'd even bonded a little with Carina.
They'd been in the trenches together, so to speak, the three of them.
"My car's parked down in the garage. Blondie, text me what time I should head over tomorrow. And I still need this guy, so make sure he gets to his car safe, huh?" She winked and turned around to leave, lifting her hand high up over her head and wiggling her fingers in a semblance of a wave with her keychain hanging from them. She didn't glance back at them even once.
Chuck snorted, then turned back to Sarah. She shifted her weight to meet his gaze, hugging herself in the cold. "You don't actually have to do that."
"Where you parked?" she asked with a shrug, smiling.
"Uh, a block or so that way."
"I'm right here across the street. Come on, I'm taking you to your car."
"N-No, Sarah. Come on, I can—"
"Chuck, it's three in the morning and we're in downtown LA and you said that shit about curling up into a ball as a defense mechanism. Come here." She laughed and grabbed his arm, tugging him along with her as he finally relented, cracking up.
Climbing into her passenger seat, he put his bag on his lap and folded his hands on top of it, looking out over the street as she turned on her car and pulled away from the curb, making a U-turn and heading down the block to where he parked his own car in the lot.
"You parked in here? And you were seriously gonna walk back here alone? Jesus, Chuck," she breathed, smirking. "The lighting is awful."
"Yeah, I know. It was stupid. But…" He left it at that. He'd been out of sorts driving here tonight, a little nervous, not sure what the night would bring. All he'd known was that Sarah's best friend needed his help and he had no reading on whether said best friend liked him at all. So yes, he'd stupidly parked in a badly lit parking lot a block and a half away. So sue him.
He suddenly felt out of his depth when they were alone in her car, parked in the spot next to his. She turned off the car and they just sat there.
Sarah finally broke the silence. "Chuck, are you sure you're okay with meeting at my place tomorrow night? Er, well…I guess since it's, like, three AM, technically it's tonight, isn't it?"
He shifted in the seat to face her better. "Of course I'm okay. You just tell me a time, and I'm there." He glanced at his watch. It was seven minutes after three now. "No way am I going into the Buy More tomorrow. I'm not dealing with that place after this." He might end up murdering one of the Buy Morons or Herders out of exhaustion and done-ness.
She let out a one syllable giggle and nodded. "That's probably for the best." Biting her lip, she shrugged one shoulder and gave him an unsure look. "It's just that, um, well, Max is gonna be there. So I feel like I should just ask again, just in case that didn't occur to you, which would be totally understandable. You sure it's okay?" She cleared her throat. "I usually get him to sleep sometime between seven and seven-thirty, closer to eight if he's having one of his stubborn nights. But, um, we can always do this after he's asleep if-if you're more comfortable with that."
Chuck understood what she was hinting at. Sure, he'd met Max a few times now, and he hoped he hadn't seemed totally terrified and unable to deal with the kid. He hoped she didn't think that he disliked him, or that he was completely out of his depth. Floundering. But Sarah was trying to give him an out, in spite of what he'd said tonight, the thing he assumed had been the reason for her practically pouncing on him. He swallowed hard thinking of it, and the way she'd kissed him, touched him. She was letting him decide if he wanted to be put in the potentially uncomfortable position of being around Max again tomorrow night, or if he'd rather show up after Max was already asleep, avoiding a meeting.
He found it wasn't all that difficult making the decision he had a pretty good feeling would make her happier. Looking her right in her face, he shook his head a little. "I'm not looking to actively avoid your son, Sarah," he said quietly. When she looked embarrassed, like she was going to deny that she thought he was, he grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. "I know. It's okay. I know you didn't think that. I just want to make sure I haven't given you any indication that that's what I'm doing."
"You haven't," she said adamantly. "I just…"
"I know," he said with a shrug, smiling. "And it's sweet of you. But unnecessary."
Sarah pursed her lips and twisted them to the side shyly, casting her gaze down and arching one eyebrow. She threaded her fingers with his and tightened her grip. "So I guess my next question is… Well, Carina's going to come and bring the work with her. Before that, well, a person's gotta eat, you know?"
"Right. That's important."
"It is," she said, nodding, still not looking at him. Still with a shy tint to her gorgeous features he could only just see in the dim lot lights. "I'm gonna be totally wiped out and I won't want to cook, that's for sure. So. The question. What are your feelings on Greek takeout?"
He raised his eyebrows, warmth and excitement bundling in his chest like a ball of yarn that a cat had just played with, a mess of cotton string sparking with static electricity. "Hm. My feelings on Greek takeout are definitely."
Sarah giggled. "Well, what's your order if Greek food ends up at the Walker apartment later tonight?"
"Yes."
She laughed this time. "Wow. Okay, that was cute; it also didn't help me at all, though."
"Sorry," he chuckled. "Whatever you get, get me some?"
She rolled her eyes. "Grape leaves?" He nodded. "Lamb gyros?" He nodded even more vigorously. "Hummus?"
"Humyes."
"Oh God," she groaned, cracking up and putting a hand against her forehead. "Get the hell outta my car. Right now."
"Am I uninvited?"
"No," she giggled. "But you're on thin ice, pal."
"That's fair."
She grinned at him, then sighed and glanced over at his car, nibbling on her bottom lip. "Five-thirty?"
"I'll be there at five-thirty."
"Okay." She grinned harder, then she pulled her lips back between her teeth and he felt a sweet awkwardness permeate the air between them. He had to get back into his car, drive home, sleep…and there were hours yet before he'd see her again. A lot of hours. Too many hours. But he was seeing her again.
Sure, it was to finish this work with Carina's computer. But he was still seeing Sarah Walker, P.I., and he would absolutely take it.
"Well…goodnight, Chuck. And…thank you. Seriously. God, you've been…frankly wonderful. Amazing." He wanted to thrash around in the seat, the ball of light in his chest was so intense. "Thank you," she added one more time, sincerity and warmth in her face.
Chuck couldn't stop himself if he tried. He leaned in, bypassing the lips he wanted to taste so badly. And instead he placed a long, warm kiss to her cheek. She turned her face just slightly and he tilted his face to place a similar kiss right against the corner of her mouth.
And he pulled back just slightly, wondering what she was thinking as she gaped at him, their faces still so close, mere inches apart.
Sarah let out a rough breath.
And then she leaned all the way across the console, her mouth covering his. He felt her hands grab his face, pulling him in even closer and he let his own hand cup her elbow. They pulled back just slightly, faces still pressed close, and her thumb stroked along the line of his jaw, sending a shiver through him.
Chuck bit his lip, wanting more. And he was just tired enough, his filter (or whatever he had of one) damaged by exhaustion, confidence brimming in him from the way she was holding onto him so tightly still, like she wanted more too. So he lunged in to kiss her harder, earning a soft whimper.
She kissed him back with a fervor he hadn't quite expected, and his eyes popped open wide. Letting out a groan that made her giggle against his lips, he thrusted his arms around her body and pulled until the console was literally the only thing keeping them apart. Stupid console.
Sarah grappled at his shoulders and yanked him in so that she could get her arms around his neck, and her fingers landed in his hair, sending a ripple of pleasure from his roots all the way down to his toes and back up again.
He didn't know quite how long they pulled at one another, the heat filling the otherwise cold car, encasing them… But Chuck gave as much as she did. That was, until he felt her give his hair a little tug. Like she'd flicked a switch or something, everything in him turned on, and his leg swung up, only for his knee to slam into the glove compartment. Hard.
"Mm…ow," he mumbled against her lips, wincing.
She broke the kiss, panting out a giggle. "I'm sorry. You okay?"
"Mhm. Yep." He kept kissing her.
But it had also been a wakeup call in a way, the weird funny-bone like tingle and pain erupting from his knee where he'd banged it against her car. Because he knew there was going to be a point of no return here, and when he found it, he wasn't sure he'd have the strength to stop and turn around. Actually, he was pretty sure he wouldn't have the strength, because he didn't want the strength.
He let out a whimper of reluctance and tilted his chin down, their lips coming apart. "Ahh…uh… God damn it, I should get to my own car and go home," he said through hard breaths.
"Right now?" she asked immediately, her own breathing pretty rough. God, her fingers were blazing a pattern through his curls even now.
"Gaah, yes. If-If I don't do it now, next time I come up for air, I'll look out that back window and the sun'll be rising."
She pecked his lips, then dotted kisses down his jaw until she breathed into his ear, "Would that be such a bad thing?"
Thank God he wasn't alone in this. It filled him with adrenaline, hearing her talk like that, knowing she wanted him, though maybe not quite as much as he wanted her. He wasn't sure it was possible for a person to want another person quite as much as he wanted her. It felt…intense.
And he needed to put some physical space here before his whole body said fuck it and they continued this in spite of their very sketchy surroundings in this dimly lit parking lot.
He needed to get into his own apartment, away from the sensation of her lips on top of his, her tongue stroking his, her fingers in his hair, the gentle but wanton stroke of her hand against his face, his neck. He needed room to think and be more…logical.
God, he didn't know, but he winced and pulled back anyway. "I really, really don't want to be the one who does this, but…check out what's outside of your car for a second. This…probably isn't the safest place for us to be right now, and um…especially not with both of us being…this distracted."
She blinked a few times and looked out of her car's back window, mimicking his wince. "You're right. And I know you're right. You're being…smart. Yeah. You should…" She let out a rough breath and licked her lips, nodding. "You should—We should go home. Our-our respective homes."
"Yeah," he breathed, and they both sat there then, looking at each other in the bad lighting of the interior of the car. It was almost funny, the way they sprang for each other again, kissing desperately, grappling at hair and faces and sleeves and collars and shoulders, getting as much as they could from one another, before Chuck regained his senses again and groaned, cupping her shoulders and gently moving her back.
"No, no. We can't do this." She slipped her hands up to his chest and strong armed him, as if it had been her idea to break the kiss again. He almost laughed at how cute it was. "Go to your car. Now. Escape while you can."
This time Chuck did laugh. "I like you a lot," he said then, quietly.
She seemed to almost melt, leaning her cheek against the headrest of her seat, a slow smile stretching over her delicious lips. "I like you a lot."
Was it normal for his heart to be doing somersaults in his chest? That felt abnormal. "Five thirty tomorrow?"
"Yeah."
"Thanks for getting me safely to my car." She giggled at that as he popped the door open, and as he began to get out, he added teasingly, "I almost didn't make it."
"Yeah, sorry about that," she drawled with a laugh.
Chuck stood up beside the car, then leaned down so he could see her again and beamed at her, wrinkling his nose. "No, you are not. And I wouldn't have you any other way."
She was still giggling as he shut the door, trotting around her car to get to his. He swung in behind the driver's seat and just sat there for a second, taking deep breaths, before he turned and met her wave with one of his own.
Their cars filed out of the lot with Chuck following Sarah for a block, before he peeled off in the other direction, unable to keep from watching her taillights in the rearview mirror before they turned the corner, out of sight.
}o{
"Ba baaa da daaaaa b'wack seep pooooooop!"
Sarah lifted her head from where she'd been hunched over the counter to stir a bit of sugar into her tea. She furrowed her brow as he sang the lyric again. "Max, is that supposed to be Ba ba Black Sheep?"
"Yeah!" He squealed and giggled where he sat at his kid-sized table off to the side from the actual dinner table, squiggling on his dry erase board. "But wif poooooooop!"
"Oh good, definitely what the song needed," she muttered, shaking her head.
She sighed, not really sure where he'd learned that the word poop was funny. He'd used it when he was first making word sounds to let her know he had to go to the bathroom, even if he just had to pee.
But apparently society had made an impression on her son and poop was funny to him.
She picked her mug up and left the kitchen, walking around to where he sat. She'd been trying to figure out how to broach the subject of them having visitors for a few hours now, ever since she woke up and crossed the city to her parents' house to bring him back home.
Max was a happy-go-lucky kid, and he usually went with the flow on things. He didn't complain much. But he was extra tired when she brought him home, and then he hadn't wanted to nap because he wanted to stay with her while she did their laundry. And once she finally got him to nap, she wanted to nap again, so she tried to, but then he woke up early from his nap crying because he was "ti-oood". But of course he was tired because he hadn't had a proper nap, and it was a late nap on top of that.
Chuck was going to show up, and Carina would arrive later after dinner, when Max was back in bed. But it was getting Max to go to bed that would prove to be the struggle of the night. Carina and Chuck might need to work without her while she laid in bed with Max to try to get him to sleep.
Chuck was being more understanding and patient than she really deserved, what with how few dates they'd been on since their first one, but more than that, he seemed to just get that dating a single mom was going to be different. Or at least, he was making a concerted effort to get it, which was just as admirable.
She didn't want to reward his patience with Max acting up when he arrived. Visitors tended to make Max grouchy when he hadn't gotten enough sleep. He was like a grumpy old man in that way.
Sarah snorted to herself as she imagined Max standing on his little chair like he loved to do all the time to freak her out, shaking his tiny round fist, grumbling Get off my w'aawwnnn!
"Wat funeeeee?" Max asked, meticulously making a circle with his red dry erase marker on his board.
"Nothing, Max." She set her mug on his table and sat in the tiny chair next to his, her knees sticking up comically. He stopped and looked at her mug, raising his eyebrows, then he lifted his gaze to her, the most Really? look she'd ever seen on his face. "Oh, sorry. Geez." She picked her mug up off of his table. "I share my table with you."
"I need woom to do aht."
"Okay, so what is this art you need so much room for? What are you drawing?"
"Dis." He pointed to his eye.
"What is that?"
"Eyeeee. An' dis." He made a circle with his fingers around his eye. "G'asses." He made big circles around the two smaller circles.
"What color are the glasses?"
"W'ed."
"And this little guy here?" She pointed at a series of vertical lines.
"Rraaawwrrrrrrr!" He dropped the marker onto the floor as he lifted his hands up like claws. "Oop."
"S'okay, I got it." She snagged the marker from the floor and handed it to him again.
"Tanks."
"You're welcome. What's rawr? Dinosaur?"
"Mmmmhm."
"Or is it a tiger?"
He gasped. "Oh. Dat. Tigoo." He paused thoughtfully and poked himself with the cap of the marker thoughtfully, making her giggle. "Is a dina. An' a tigoo."
"A dinosaur tiger?"
"Yeah! Yep."
"Sounds cool."
"Yep! Coo!"
Sarah gnawed on her lip then, deciding she needed to just tell Max. She was nothing if not honest with her son. And that would give her a chance to gauge how he felt about Chuck spending time with them tonight. He'd seemed okay with the addition when the Nerd Herd area specialist had shown up at her office out of the blue. But he'd been in a good mood that day.
Today was not a great mood day.
"Hey, Max?"
"Okay. Yes. Mmhmm."
Sarah pressed her lips together, curious. "Does-Does that mean you're listening to me?"
He glanced up at her and nodded, making an arch on the board, giving off a disgruntled sound, and setting the marker down to grab the eraser, swiping it a little violently over the whole board. He picked the marker back up and started making dots all over the board. "Dis 'ain."
"Is it raining?"
"Mhm."
"Are you listening to me? Can you listen to me for a second? Put the marker down so that I know you're paying attention, please."
He didn't look happy about it but he listened to her, setting it down and turning to look up at her, crossing his arms with a small pout. "I y'issen."
"Thank you. So I'm ordering Greek food for dinner if that's okay with you."
"Ape 'eaves?" His blue eyes lit up.
"Yep, your favorite. I know. Grape leaves. And hummus. And lamb. A whole lot of stuff you love."
"Okayyyyy! Wow! Woweeee!"
"But there's something else that's coming with the Greek food."
"Emmo bubboo?"
She frowned. "Elmo bubbles?"
"Is Emmo bubbooo. Blubblublub pop pop."
"Oh. No, Max. Not a toy. And I maybe need to have a talk with Carina about letting you watch too much TV." She had a feeling Max had seen a commercial for a toy bubble maker that looked like his favorite monster from Sesame Street. Sarah took a deep breath. "Do you remember Chuck?"
"Yeah. Mommy f'end."
"Mhm." She smiled. "He's my friend who I like a whole lot. Because I like him so much, I asked him to come and eat with us tonight. He's going to be here soon."
"Okay."
"Okay? That's it?"
"Mhm. Okay I see." He nodded. "B'ing stickooahs?"
The only downside of Chuck being so sweet and thoughtful the night of their first date: now Max would equate him with stickers or some other sort of gift.
"Buddy, I don't think you should expect Chuck to bring you something every time you see him. That isn't fair to make him do that. Carina doesn't bring you a gift every time she comes, right?"
"No." He sighed melodramatically and she bit her lip to keep from showing her amusement.
"So Chuck doesn't always have to bring you a gift either when he's here, right?"
"Okay." He nodded. "He eat my ape 'eaves?" There was a dubious look on his face.
"I'm getting a whole lot of grape leaves, bud. You can share."
"Oh. Okay I see. Jus' make-y shoo."
"I know you're just making sure, you little troll," she teased, ruffling his hair. "You're such a grape leaf glutton."
"Poop!"
"All right. Good talk," she groused as she rolled her eyes and pushed up from the small chair, groaning. The lack of sleep the night before had her limbs so damn tired and achy. "I'm calling to order our food to be delivered. Can you stay here and draw?" He started to climb to stand on the chair, because for some reason he thought the angle of stooping down over the table to draw made his pictures better, but Sarah was faster than he was, gently taking his arm. "Ah ah. Nope. You're sitting safely in the chair. Not standing."
"Mommy!"
"Nope."
"But I hab to d'aw ha'w an' a hat!"
"You can draw hair and a hat while sitting…" She grabbed her phone, grumbling, "And not breaking your skull open," even as she dialed the number.
}o{
Chuck practically trotted down the hallway towards Sarah's apartment. He'd slept most of the day and he felt fantastic. But he was full of nerves, too. And he wondered if there would come a point in this burgeoning relationship when the prospect of seeing her two year old son didn't make him nervous.
He straightened his button-up that he'd shrugged on over the Live Long and Prosper T-shirt he was wearing, halting just outside of the door to her apartment.
There was a sound coming from inside that didn't…sound too promising.
And he winced, unsure of pretty much everything suddenly.
Oh boy…
Chuck knocked lightly and took a step back, wondering if he should've brought more than just dessert, like something special for Max. Especially considering the sound he thought he heard in there was the sound of a two year old's sobbing.
Maybe he could play off the dessert as being for Max, and he could persuade the little guy to share with his mom?
After a minute of standing out in the hallway, he wondered if maybe they hadn't heard his knock. It had been a pretty timid knock.
He knocked a little louder this time.
There was a muffled voice on the other side of the door, and then he heard the lock being thrown, and the moment the door popped open, his fears were confirmed.
Max was crying.
"Okay. Okay, okay, buddy. I know you're upset. It'll be okay…"
The door opened wider and Sarah appeared, looking stressed but immediately glad to see him. That right there eased a lot of the nerves. She was glad he was here, in spite of what she was apparently dealing with right now.
"Hey…" he tried.
She winced, obviously embarrassed. "Hi, Chuck. I—" She stopped when Max let out another cry. "Please… please come in." And then she opened the door all the way, stepping out of the way for Chuck to come in. "Max. Please. Please stop crying for me? It's not really that big of a deal and I know you know this. You're just insanely tired." She turned back to Chuck. "He's super tired. And I… Shit," she breathed, reaching out to grab his arm and squeeze, even as she shut the door with her other hand.
"He okay?" Chuck asked in concern, glancing over her head at Max. He sat in the middle of a two-year-old-sized table, his legs hanging over the side in their purple pants, bare feet kicking. His face was red and tear streaked, even as his sobbing became the saddest little blubbering sound, his lips in a heartbreaking pout. How was he this angry and this cute all at once? That was impressive.
"He's…upset."
"I can tell."
Only then did Chuck realize Sarah had her phone trapped between her ear and her shoulder. "No, no. I know, Imram. I totally understand," she said to…Imram, who was apparently on the other end of the line. "Just a second, please. I'm sorry." She pulled the phone away and took a deep breath. "I'm so sorry—Max…" She tried over her shoulder. "You're freaking out about something very trivial, baby." She turned back and pinched the bridge of her nose. "He's two. He's only two. It isn't trivial to him."
He wondered how often she repeated this mantra.
"I'm sorry. This is definitely not the welcome you were expecting." She looked both mortified and tired.
Chuck didn't know how or why, but he suddenly felt the spirit of Eleanore Faye Bartowski take over. He would bring calm to the room, to this situation, whatever it was. But first, he needed to know the situation. "Okay, hold on. It's okay. But… Wait, can I put this down real quick?"
Sarah looked down at the bag in his hand. "Yeah, sure you—What…is it?"
"Later," he said, rushing over to put the bag on the big person table before coming back to her side. "What exactly did I walk in on here? It sounds like a catastrophe."
"It isn't. But Max is in…a mood."
"It not MOOD, Mommyyy!" Max snapped from his perch on the table, the blubbering becoming one long whine.
Sarah took a long breath and let it out slowly. "I have Imram from the Greek restaurant on the phone. I just ordered everything, but he called back and their delivery guy was in an accident while delivering someone else's dinner and his car is totaled so he can't deliver our order. I couldn't just go and get it myself because I'd have to pack him up into his carseat and even if I did do that, I didn't want you showing up here and having to sit in the hallway or something. So I was going to just cancel the order and get food from somewhere else that can deliver, but Max overheard me say that and he's so obsessed with the idea of eating Greek food now that he started crying because he doesn't want anything else. He was really relying on grape leaves. And I'm just trying to…make everyone happy." She lifted the phone to her ear again. "Imram, I'm so sorry. Thank you for being so patient with us. It isn't your fault at all." She paused. "No, no. Don't return the money to my card. Keep it. I just want you to worry about making sure Dimos is okay."
Chuck waved his hands in front of her to get her attention, an idea striking him. Max had started crying again, and with the way he was switching his blue eyes back and forth from his mom and Chuck, it felt purposeful. Like he knew he wasn't getting the attention he wanted and needed it back on him.
He remembered it oh so well from his babysitting days in high school. It was a lot cuter this time than it had been with those kids then.
And right on cue, Sarah turned to give her son the flattest mom look ever. "Max, come on. That's a fake cry. You think I don't know your fake cries by now?"
He just barely disguised his amusement over that. Yep. She was a good mom.
When she turned back, Chuck took his car keys out of his pocket. "Listen, I'll just get it."
"What?" Sarah raised her eyebrows.
"The food. I'll go pick it up. They can't deliver it, so I'll go get it. It's win-win. Max gets his Greek food, the food you ordered doesn't go to waste, you haven't wasted money either. Problem solved."
"You don't win in this scenario, Chuck. I'm not making you get back in your car to go get the food when you just got done driving to come here."
"You're not making me do anything. I'm offering. It's not like I had to drive here from Alaska, I was in the car for maybe fifteen minutes if that. Oh no, I'm already out the door, here I go, can't stop me, I'm goi—Wait." He stopped inching towards the door. "Where is this place?"
Sarah sighed heavily. "Chuck, I can't—"
"Let me do this," he half-begged. "Let me do this for Max. Not gonna lie, the possibility of scoring some points here has occurred to me."
Giggling, she shook her head. "Boy, you are honest." She wrinkled up her face in reluctance. "Gah, fine. Fine. Are you sure, though?"
"Absolutely," he said with a grin.
"Okay, just a second." She lifted the phone to her ear. "Imram, I'm sending my…" She froze and lifted her gaze to Chuck's, looking a bit struck. "Someone's coming to get the food. Keep it hot for us, huh? …Okay… Yeah. Give Dimos our best."
Sarah hung up her phone and lowered her arm to her side. "Chuck, seriously. This—"
"It's perfectly fine. I promise." And he carefully curled his fingers around her hand, holding it tightly, securely. She squeezed back just as tight, a small smile on her face. Chuck noticed Max was back to the sad little blubber sound and the sniffling. "I got this. You, uh, you get that." He gestured towards Max with a lift of his chin and Sarah gave him a wry look. He leaned in a little. "Can, um, can I approach him when he's like this? Or will it make him more upset?"
She giggled. "He isn't a rabid dog," she teased.
He glared a little and stepped around her, letting his fingers stay in hers until he stepped far enough away that her hand fell back to her side. He approached Max who still sat on his table, twisting his hands in his lap in distress.
"Hey. Hi," he breathed, kneeling in front of him so that he had to look up at the two year old.
"Hi," Max whimpered, pushing his hand across his snotty nose.
"How you doin', Max?"
"Bad." He pouted harder, a big giant tear rolling down his cheek.
In spite of Sarah insisting some of this was faking and the rest of it was tiredness, it still tugged at Chuck's heart to see him this sad.
"I'm sorry," he said as sincerely as he could.
"S-S'okay. Sometime we hab…to c'y." God, this kid was smart. And he had a good memory, too. Or Chuck had made something of an impact the last time he'd seen him.
"You're right. We all have to cry sometimes. Whether it's over a booboo or Greek food. You gotta let it out. But, hey listen. You want your Greek food, huh?"
"I…" He sniffed hard. "…y'ike ape 'eaf."
"Grape leaves," Sarah explained quietly. "He's a big fan."
"Oh, I get that. Grape leaves are the best."
Max's eyes widened. "You y'ike 'em?"
"Love them. But listen, you don't have to cry anymore, okay?"
"I do. Mommy say I hab to eat boogers."
Chuck narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips, confused. "I guess I would cry too if I thought I was getting grape leaves and I ended up having to eat boogers."
Max let out peals of laughter as Sarah groaned. "Great. He'll be repeating that one for months," she groused, giggling as she walked over. "He was saying burgers. I was going to just order burgers to be delivered but then this one had his tantrum."
"Oh. That makes a lot more sense," Chuck laughed. "I genuinely didn't—Ahem, anyway." Sarah was giving him a dubious look. "Max, I'm going to go get your grape leaves, okay? I'll be right back with 'em. What do ya say?"
"You get da 'eaves?"
"Yep."
"Hey…" He took a sudden, rough breath. "Hey, t'anks!"
The older of the two chuckled, charmed out of his mind by the two year old whose tears were miraculously dried up.
"Hey, you're welcome!" Chuck chirped. He gently reached out to pat Max on the knee before he stood up to his full height. "I'll be right back. What's the name of the place? I'll GPS it in the car."
"Gyros A'Plenty."
"Okay. Don't even breathe 'til I get back," he said teasingly, pointing at the Walkers in warning.
Max looked confused but he sucked in a deep breath and held it with his cheeks puffed out.
Laughing, Chuck went to the door and opened it. "That's just a phrase, Max. You can breathe."
"Oh." Max shrugged and scooted off of the table, hopping down and running full speed, practically bounding to Chuck. The small body crashed into his leg, short arms rounding his thigh, and Max buried his face in his jeans.
Chuck looked up at Sarah with an excited gasp, and she just beamed at him, shrugging, crossing her arms. He gently laid his hand on the wavy brown hair on top of Max's head, then waited for the boy to release him before he opened the door to leave. "Well, now I'm gonna be extra fast after that. Thank you, Max."
"It work! Yeah!"
And Max ran off, leaving Chuck rocking forward with laughter. Before he could get much further into the hallway, though, he heard Sarah behind him.
"Chuck, wait…hold on…just a sec…"
He stopped and turned back. She'd inched out of the apartment, shutting the door behind her so that it was just barely ajar. She closed the distance and laid a hand at the back of his neck, falling into him and tilting her face up, her lips smashing against his.
She broke the kiss again too soon, and she smirked. "Something tells me you're gonna be the big hero of the night."
He blinked. "Well. That alone was worth it. I'd drive to Tallahassee, Florida to get this Greek food of yours now."
Sarah smiled softly and leaned up to press a quicker kiss to his lips this time. But it was no less effective.
"Make that Montreal, Canada."
Her giggle followed him down the hallway, into the elevator, and down to his car. And he found he felt a certain extra pressure around his leg, a lovely ghost of the hug he'd been gifted from a two year old who was obsessed with grape leaves.
A/N: Hey, Chuck is the best best best best best best best dude. In case anyone was wondering why Sarah (in canon and in this story) falls so hard and so fast. Also, I'm in a contest with myself to see how cute I can write Max while also hopefully being realistic about the antics and thoughts and concerns of a two and a half year old. I hope I'm winning! Please review, it means a lot. Thanks!
-SC
