Open your gaming juice and take a swig, gamers!
ACT 2
Da rockin' theme song:
People can't even see!
When you have to be…
THE GUY!
Title logo appears on the horizon adorned with platinum accents
My mother sold my raincoat…
Now I have a wet head!
The rain hates me!
The clouds berate me!
That's because I never got to be instead!
Yeah, I'm the guy!
I hate people with chihuahuas
Dogs go arf and Taco Bell's for losers!
Rhyming songs sound bad.
Just like my own dad!
He fought in waffles for my soul!
And now I feel whole!
That's because…
I have to be…
THE GUY!
End of da rockin' theme song.
Marx's entire leg exploded into eleven separate fragments all named Carlos Wilhelm Jr.
"Mama mia…" said Bandana Dee, lifting up a raging bull. He launched it at the villainous Galacta Knight, but it had no effect on the fearsome foe.
"Dang! I forgot to mention to you all that Galacta Knight has cattle-deflection abilities built in to his life," said Kine with mentioning properties.
"You don't say…" said Meta Knight. He knew that already, but his rear was still stuck in the beartrap from earlier. I must extract this later… he said to himself with his thoughts. It was like being telepathic with your own brain speaking to your gallbladder.
Marx looked at his deceased leg and grit his sharp teeth like cheese hitting a grate. "You'll pay for your sins to my mayo, you cad," he bellowed ominously.
Galacta Knight swung his sword and chopped off Marx's other leg. "See how effective my powers are? A weakling such as thou doesn't deserve dat totes rad mayo, bruh."
Marx could not believe his disowned ears. He hated Galacta Knight's unfriendliness with a staunch passion.
Meta Knight noticed the young grape's rage building like a Totodile in a Crystal speedrun. "Maybe Marx can reclaim his mayo adoration should Galacta Knight fail to perceive his hidden prowess…" he mused aloud.
Bandana Dee fetched a large jug of cool spring water and downed it in a single gulp. He wiped the corners of his nonexistent mouth with his pulsating biceps. The glimmering hope of vapour emanated from his buff exterior as he flexed wholeheartedly like a god of typhoons.
"I can see you are flexing, but my biceps are much more impressive, young Dee…" said Galacta Knight. He spun around to face the Bandana Boy and did a mighty flex of his northernmost toenail.
The toenail struck Dee's biceps dead-on and they popped like hunky balloons. "Murderous beacons!" cursed Dee. He pulled out his mighty axe guitar and started serenading the wind with his sick riffs.
"A musician as well?" Galacta Knight emitted a light chuckle. "I see, so you aren't the world's strongest. You are but a jack-of-all-trades."
"So true…" said Kine worriedly. He placed all his faith in Dee's beats.
"No matter," Galacta Knight said with his intimidation factor turned up to eleven. "I have the power of god, do not forget."
Bandana Dee, you cannot best him. This is my duty to uphold, surely… murmured Marx in his soul. His mind could only imagine the turmoil of his kidnapped mayo.
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