Chapter 5: Broken Boy

Izuku was in a dark room. An inky expanse of nothingness. It was plutonian yet familiar. The darkness was choking yet welcoming. He recognized this place. He was inside One For All. It was the home of the vestiges of past users. Was this a dream? If not, Izuku wondered who had brought him here. Usually there was some outside source that drew him in. Well, that or it was by accident. I guess this could actually be a dream then. He took a step further into the blackness.

Of all the times he had been here in the past, Izuku couldn't remember it ever being this dark. Yoichi, the first user, and the other vestiges of One For All had always acted as a light to illuminate the room. Not this time. This time it was dark and empty. Izuku blindly walked forward. He held his hands outstretched to prevent himself from running into anything. If there was anything here to bump into in the first place that is. He continued his trek forward for what felt like hours before a piercing light broke through the darkness. A circle of light shown on the floor 30 feet in front of him displacing the nothingness illuminating the form of a man sitting on a chair.

"Hello? Who's there?" Izuku calls out to no response.

"Are... Are you one of the vestiges of One For All?" No response

"Why. Why was I brought here?" Silence.

Izuku cautiously approached the strange figure. After a few moments, he felt a tingle on the back of his neck. A feeling of another presence tugged at his mind like a six sense. He rounds in place to face whatever being was haunting him but met no such foe. Only the blackness of the void. He looks to the left and right. Up and down. Searching everywhere for a sign of anything but finds nothing other than the man in the chair. "I must be seeing things," Izuku chuckled at the realization of what he'd just said. "or, rather, not seeing things I guess." He corrected himself with a nervous laugh as he once again continued to approach the man.

Once Izuku reached the chair, he was greeted by a familiar face; however, something was terribly wrong. Yoichi, the first user, was tied to the chair and gagged, his arms bound around his back. His head was slouched and his long white hair draped over his eyes.

"Yoichi!" Izuku cried noticing a large red impact wound on the albino's head, a stream of crimson lead down his head and dripped off his chin. "No wonder he didn't respond. Are you ok?"

The vestige doesn't stir at the sound. Izuku rushed to his side and untied the user's hands shaking him firmly in an attempt to wake him up. Several seconds pass and the white-haired man begins to stir.

"What happened? Why are you tied up? Who… What did this to you?" Izuku bombarded the wounded man with questions as he struggled to wake up.

The man finally opens his eyes. His gaze flicks upward and widens. He starts thrashing frantically and screaming into his gag. His chair rocking and clattering on the ground of the black room. Izuku, feeling like an idiot for not doing it sooner, quickly reached out removes the gage from Yoichi's mouth.

"IZUKU! BEHIND YOU!" Yoichi screamed as soon as the gag was loosened.

Frightened by the sudden shout, Izuku jumped in place, hand clutching at his palpating heart. He quickly turned around and what little composure he had slips away. A cracked bloody hand with only two fingers outstretched was mere inches away from his face. Shigaraki.

Izuku screamed out in terror and the inky void faded from view.

Izuku shot up in bed, his heart racing as cold sweat trickled down the back of his neck. He was ok. He was back in the infirmary. He wasn't dead. Shigaraki wasn't back. It was only a dream he told himself. He was back in the hospital bed which he had apparently been lying in for the last two months. The familiar scenery did little to calm his racing mind but did help to ease his heartrate slightly.

Kirishima lay next to him curled into a ball. His face crammed into his knees which were tightly clutched to his chest. His fading red hair shrouded the features of his face while he slept. A damp spot on the pillow seeped out from around his eyes. He had been crying. Katsuki was in a similar state. He still sat in the chair next to Izuku's bed, however he was laying against the bed face first. A puddle of drool soaked the sheets. Why is everyone still here…. Shouldn't they have gone back to the dorms to sleep or something?

Looking around his white walled room, Izuku's gaze met his teacher's. Aizawa was sitting in one of the black leather chairs from the waiting room. His eyes far redder and more bloodshot than usual. He looked up from the large leather-bound book he had been reading and stared at Izuku.

"Problem child," His teacher nodded slightly at him.

"G-good morning sir,' Izuku said, his voice horse.

"It's not morning." His teacher said in a matter of fact tone as he tilted his head back and put something into his eyes. Are those eye drops? I guess that makes sense.

"It's… It's not?" Izuku looked out the window. The bright sun filtered through the thin white curtains.

"It's almost 2 PM." Aizawa stated. "You kids were so exhausted after…. After last night that I just let you sleep. I figured you needed the rest." Izuku rubbed the back of his neck as his mind flooded with glimpses of both his nightmare and reality. The blackness of the void. Yoichi tied to a chair. A bloody hand. Japan in ruins. His friends missing or dead.

"Ha…ha… yeah…" he stuttered a laugh and looked over at Kirishima sleeping next to him. "I guess I… we did… especially after…" He thought back to the conversation he had with them the night before. The pain he had felt washed over him again like lava melting away his heart. He couldn't deal with it. Not now. His chest tightened and it felt like his diaphragm was doing summersaults in his ribcage. Izuku did something he had only done once before in his life. One extremely dark day. A Day that changed his life. The day when his dad had left them. He imagined himself taking all the thoughts, emotions, and regrets and packed them tightly in a box. He envisioned himself storing away all his pain in the dark recesses of his mind. He whispered himself a promise that he'd deal with them later.

A numbness settled over Izuku. The pain was still there. The hurt was still there. But it's affect was different. Izuku wanted to cry. He wanted nothing more than to sit there in that bead and ball his heart out. The numbness wouldn't let him. It was as if his tear ducts had dried up the instant he packed away the thoughts of his loss.

"How are you feeling Midoriya?" Aizawa set his book on a nearby table covered in magazines and looked at Izuku, his left eyebrow raised.

How am I feeling? Izuku thought to himself. I feel like I've been tortured. I feel like my soul has been clawed out of my body with a blunt spoon. I feel like I'll never be happy again. By no means am I doing ok… but…. Even so… I guess I'm doing better than a lot of people right now…. So many people have lost so much… Can I really complain? I still have Kacchan and Kirishima. I still Have Aizawa Sensei and All Might…. There must be so many people out there who truly lost everything. I know I'm not ok… but I'm not crying so I must be doing better right? Izuku tried to reason with himself. He tried desperately to convince himself that the numbness that he now felt was progress.

"I'm doing ok," he said shifting slightly on the bed. Gaze refusing to meet his teachers.

"Are you now? Are you dealing with your emotions in a healthy way? Like I asked you to last night?" Memories of the conversation flooded into his mind. Aizawa telling him his friends are dead. Him begging to be sedated so that he doesn't have to feel the pain of his heart being ripped out of his body.

"Y-yes sir. I am." Izuku lied.

"Hmm," Aizawa leaned forward placing his elbows on his knees, hands clasped in a point placed under his teachers chin pensively. "Is that so?" he continued. "If you are telling the truth than you are taking all of this much better than I ever gave you credit for. Last night not withstanding of course." Aizawa stood up from his seat and grabbed his book.

"Your injuries have been healed to a point where Recovery Girl has cleared you to return back to the dorms. You are free to leave whenever you are ready Midoriya. Why don't you wake young Bakugo and take him to Recovery Girl to get his hand fixed? After that you three can head back to the dorms and get some more sleep." Aizawa turned to leave, arms down to his sides and back hunched ever so slightly.

His hand? Why would he need…. For the first time since he woke up, Izuku realized that he was holding Kacchan's hand. He was holding Kacchan's hand. HE WAS HOLDING KACCHAN'S HAND! With a quick jerk, Izuku retracted his hard from Kacchan's grip. A tremor going through the blond as he begun to wake with a drawn-out groan.

Izuku looked down at Kacchan's hand for the first time and froze. It was a dark purply blue. Several of his fingers were contorted in strange ways. It was obviously broken.

"Kacchan!" Izuku shook the blonde's shoulder. "What on earth happened to your hand?!" Aizawa halted his progress out of the room and turned back to look at the three of them.

Kacchan groaned as he lifted his head out of the puddle of drool he had been making for the last several hours. He looked at Izuku and then down at his own hand. His hand tremored and flinched, closing ever so slightly before opening back up with an exasperated breath from the blond.

"Fuck," Kacchan whispered as he stared down at his battered hand.

"Kacchan, what on earth happened to your hand?" Izuku repeated as he sat up straight on the bed.

"The hell do you think happened nerd? You pulverized it when you went ape-shit last night." Izuku panicked at the thought of having hurt one of his friends.

"Wait. What? I… I hurt you?" Izuku's mind began racing. He felt so bad for hurting his friend and wanted to do anything he could to help him feel better. "I… I… Kacchan. I'm so sorry. I never meant to…. I can't believe that… Here," he started to sit up, "let me go get recovery girl. She can fix that right away." Kacchan placed his undamaged hand on Izuku's chest and pressed him firmly back into the bed.

"Fucking sit down Deku. God you're so tiring. Yeah, my shitty hand is broken. Fuck you for that by the way. I'll just have recovery girl fix it before we leave. Oi! Shitty hair. Wake the fuck up." Eijirou uncurled from his ball and stretched out like a star fish, right arm stretching across Izuku's lap.

"Morning guys," he said with a yawn rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Still not morning," Aizawa deadpanned from his spot by the door.

"Fucking whatever," Kacchan nagged glaring daggers at their teacher. "Shitty Hair, help the nerd up. I'm gonna go see the old hag about getting my damn hand fixed. This shit fucking hurts! Once I get back we can go back to the dorms." He points at Izuku, "you" he points at Kirishima, "and you" he shifted his finger to Aizawa, "And especially fucking you, are going to get some actual god damn sleep for once." Kacchan clenched his teeth as he hissed out a breath.

"B-but" Izuku started to speak but was interrupted by Kacchan.

"No buts nerd, you're gonna go get some more sleep. Why the hell do I have to be the fucking adult all the time. God." He cursed turning back to Kirishima. "Don't leave till I get back alright Shitty Hair?" Kacchan looked at Kirishima expectantly. The redhead yawned and sat up, exiting his starfish pose.

"You got it Bakubro." Kirishima said with a halfhearted grin and a thumbs up. Katsuki glared at him for a moment before turning and walking out of the room. Aizawa followed soon after.

Izuku and Kirishima sat in silence for several minutes while Kacchan was out of the room. Izuku had so much on his mind that he practically forgot about his friend sitting next to him. By the time he realized, he felt that it would be awkward to start a conversation now and was worried that there was something else wrong. Neither seemed to want to be the one to break the silence.

Occasionally Kirishima would sound like he was about to say something but would catch himself before a word had fully formed. He would then reposition himself on the bed and stare in a direction other than Izuku. This didn't help Izuku's feeling that something was wrong.

After an eternity, Kacchan reentered the room. His repaired hand thrust into the pocket of his blue jeans. Kacchan simply motioned for them to follow with his other hand and then left the room without a word.

"Well…" Kirishima said with a sheepish smile. "I guess that's Bakugo-ese for 'lets' go you damn nerds.' Izuku couldn't help but chuckle slightly at Kirishima's impersonation of Kacchan. The redhead seemed to flash a genuine smile at that.

Izuku made to get out of bed but his knees failed him when he tried to stand. He dropped like a rock in a pond. He would have crashed face first into the floor too had his friend not lunged over the bed, grabbed him by the back of the shirt, and controlled his descent onto the ground.

"I guess my muscles are a little out of practice." Izuku said, startled from his body's betrayal.

"No kidding Izuzu." Kirishima let go of Izuku and quickly ran around the bed.

"Izuzu?" Izuku tilted his head towards his friend in confusion?

"I… Um… well…. You and Bakubro have your nicknames for each other…. I just figured... that. Well. Since we've been through so much…" Kirishima looked down at his feet and shuffled in place. Izuku was touched at the redheads attempts to deepen his friendship with him and laughed.

"I love it… Eijikun" Izuku said with a genuine smile. He accepted his friends outstretched hand as the redhead pulled him to his feet…

"…Eijikun? I like it!" Eijikun said enthusiastically pulling Izuku into a tight hug.

Having been released from his friend's tight grip, the two of them made their way out of the infirmary. They met Kacchan in the hall and left the infirmary to go back to the dorms.

Izuku tried to sleep. He really did. It had been hours since the three of them had returned to the dorms and gone to their respective bedrooms to get some more rest. He was so tired but just couldn't get comfortable. There was too much on his mind.

When the had entered the dorms, Izuku's heart hurt at how quiet it was. They made it all the way to their floor without running into a single other student. Izuku hoped it was just because the other students were all home for the summer. Or, he tried to hope that. Hope was difficult for him right now. It threatened to unbox things Izuku wanted to leave in storage.

Kirishima had helped him up the stairs and down the hall to his room. Izuku had wanted to sprint down the hall so that he didn't have to see the nameplates on all of the doors. He couldn't think about the fact that all of his friends…. To think that he was the only one left on this floor. Eijikun had stopped any attempts that Izuku had made with his firm supporting grip around him. Izuku had shuffled down the hall looking at his feet instead. Even though Izuku was standing side by side with a friend, he felt completely and utterly alone.

Hours had passed since then and his room was now cast in gloomy shadow. The sun having just dipped below the horizon. Izuku lay on his bed staring out his window. The purples and oranges of the fading sunset tugged at his heart. How dare the sky be beautiful when his friends weren't there to see it. Why did things have to keep moving forward. Why couldn't everything just stop. Why couldn't things be like in the old pre-quirk era movies. Where something terrible would happen to the main characters and time would just seemingly stop. The world would halt and wait for them till their issues were resolved. Why did the sky have to be so beautiful? Why couldn't the weather just reflect his broken feelings. Izuku wanted nothing more than for that beautiful sunset to be replaced with the violent storm clouds that overcast his mind.

Izuku slowly forced himself out of bed. He couldn't sleep. He had to do something. Anything. Anything at all that would take his mind off of everything. He slowly shuffles himself across the room to his desk. This was easier said than done. Between his protesting muscles and his fluffy All Might socks on the slick floor, Izuku nearly fell three times crossing just the 5-foot distance.

Finally sitting in his chair, he grabbed his latest quirk analysis composition book and opened it to the next page. He grabbed his pencil and stared expectantly at the page. Nothing came to him. That was a first. Izuku tried to force himself to write something. Anything. But there just wasn't any passion. He couldn't think of anything to analyze. Come on Izuku, you can do this. I know you can. I got it! Add to Kacchan's analysis. That always helped cheer you up in the past! Izuku flipped his book closed and grabbed a book titled "Quirk Analysis for the Future #1". He quickly opened it to the first page and tried to mentally prepare himself to write. Nothing. Nothing came to him. Frustrated, he threw his pencil back into the All Might mug on his desk and closed his book with a huff.

Izuku decided that maybe he just wasn't in the right mindset right now for quirk analysis. It made sense. He'd been through a lot. He missed his friends. He figured that the combination of everything he'd been going through over the last few months was just messing with his ability to think straight. After a few moments of thinking, Izuku decided that he would try and draw something to distract himself.

Nothing. There was no passion. No motivation at all.

"This is ridiculous!" Izuku said to the empty room as he pushed himself up from his desk.

He tried several other things that he usually loved doing. He looked at the latest hero news, well, that was just a bad idea honestly. He tried watching a movie but found he lost interest before the opening credits were over. He tried to read a book. Got half a page in and closed it. Anxiety started building up in his chest fueled by the anger of his own inability to relax. Finally, Izuku couldn't take being cooped up in his room decided that he needed to go for a run.

He got dressed, grabbed his phone, his headphones, and ran out of the room quickly. He made no effort to be quiet as he stomped down the stairs trying to expend as much energy as possible. His muscles had gotten used to his movements by now it seemed and he was able to get around with only minor issues.

He left the dorms and turned on his music really loud in hope of drowning out any unwanted thoughts. After a few minutes of running, Izuku failed at it too. His two months lying in the infirmary had completely destroyed his stamina. Enraged at his complete inability to do anything, Izuku ripped out his headphones and chucked his phone into the grass beside the path with a scream. I'm so tired of this! Why can't I freaking do anything right! I just want to freaking calm down. I need to do something but I can't. I need to move, but I can't. I can't even sit still. I feel like I have freaking ants crawling through my bloodstream and if I don't do something they'll eat their way out of my heart.

Izuku pulled at his hair a bit harder than he meant to then angerly thrust his hands deep into his pockets and continued to walk. If he couldn't run, he'd at least walk around the campus until his legs failed him. At least then he hoped he'd be tired enough to sleep for a bit.

Kirishima woke up with a start to the sound of a slamming door. The heck was that? He groggily got out of bed honestly thankful to have been woken up. That night nightmare had been pretty awful. Well, it was the same nightmare he'd had every night for the last two months… but that didn't make it any better. He had been stuck in an endless loop watching mina and his other friends get hurt and killed in a thousand different ways.

He looked out his window furrowing his brows in concern. Izuku was running away from the building looking extremely distressed. This can't be good. I should follow him, right? But. But what if he just needs some time alone right now? Interrupting that wouldn't be very manly of me. Kirishima's mind was made up soon however. He saw Izuku practically have a meltdown. He threw his phone across the lawn, grabbed at his hair, screamed, and sulked off shoving his hands into his pocket.

"The little guy's gonna get myself hurt," Kirishima muttered to himself as he put on his shoes, not bothering to change out of his Crimson Riot pajamas. He left his room careful to close his door quietly so to not wake up Bakugo next door and jogged down the hall.

It took him about 5 minutes to jog to where Midoriya had thrown his phone. He picked it up wondering what about it had made him so angry. He looked at the song that had been playing. 'Broken Boy' good upbeat song for running… Though, I guess the lyrics didn't sit well with Izuku. Kirishima pocketed his friend's phone and jogged down the path in the direction Izuku had been walking.

After a few minutes at a decent pace, Kirishima saw Izuku in the distance. Not wanting the guy to get any further from him, Kirishima called out to his friend.

"Izuzu! Hey man, wait up!" Izuku froze in place but didn't turn around to greet him.

Kirishima closed the remaining 30' distance at a near sprint and once again greeted his friend as he caught his breath.

"Hey man, are… are you doing ok?" Kirishima reached out and put a hand on Izuku's shoulder.

"Y-yeah… I'm. I'm doing fine Eijikun." Izuku turned to face him with a wavering smile. That didn't look much like Izuzu's usual smile… Yeah, pretty sure he's not actually doing ok….

"Could… you leave me alone for a bit? I just kinda need to walk and think right now?" Oh no, I might have been concerned about it before, but to leave him alone right now would be super not manly.

"I... uh… I can't do that man… Look," He rubbed the back of his neck. "In all honestly, you don't look good right now. If you feel anything like I do, and I'm pretty sure you do. You're doing everything you can right now just to hold onto what little control you have right?" Izuku winced.

"Now is when you need friendship more than ever!" Kirishima flashed him a smile and placed his hand on Izuku's shoulder. "Look, I know you don't want to talk or anything. I get that. It's fine ok? Just… Just let me walk with you or something. I really don't like the idea of you wandering alone out here right now…. Especially after…" Kirishima didn't finish his sentence. Izuku had turned and started to walk away. Well, he didn't say no.

Kirishima fell into step beside Izuku and the pair of them walked around campus for a while in silence. It was weird seeing the campus at night. There was no one anywhere. Well, not that there were many people around during the day right now anyways. But something about it felt different. Alien almost. He found himself paying attention to things he never had before. Details of buildings, plants growing along the pathways, plaques and statues dedicated to heroes from the school. Izuku looked at none of these things. His friend simply shuffled along staring at his feet.

Kirishima wanted to do something, anything to help him. But he knew that in his current state, Izuku would just close off more. He knew how his friend felt and it hurt his heart to know what he was going through. It had taken him almost a month to get to where he could leave his room without breaking down into tears at just the thought of his friends… of Mina…. Kirishima sniffed quietly and they continued their walk around campus.

After about an hour of wandering aimlessly, he and Izuku had made their way back to the dorms. Music and a dim light met them when they entered the common room. Yaomomo was sitting on the couch under a thousand blankets watching some ancient tv show. Her hair was down shadowing her face rather than in its usual gravity defying pony tail. As they stepped out of the elevator, she had just pulled a tissue out of her arm and was wiping away tears that had apparently been on her face.

"Kiri, Izuku," Yaomomo stuttered, "I… I didn't expect to see the two of you up this late. Sorry if I disturbed you or anything with the noise… I couldn't sleep."

"No, no, you're good." Kirishima responded with a wave of his hand. "Izuzu and I couldn't sleep either. We decided to just go for a bit of a walk around campus. What are you watching?" He looked at the tv and saw the black and white pictures of a man and a woman in what seemed to be a city apartment.

"Oh, it's a show that I used to watch all the time with my parents growing up. It's called I Love Lucy. It was made a few hundred years ago in the 1950's. See that one there?" She pointed to the girl with the shorter curly hair. "That's Lucy, she's married to Ricky." She pointed to the man who was currently yelling at her.

"Have you ever watched it Izuku-kun?" Momo looked expectantly at Izuku who refused to answer and instead looked away.

"You mind if we watch with you for a bit?" Kirishima asked glancing at Izuku who just stared blankly at the TV. "I don't think either of us has watched it before and it looks pretty interesting."

"Oh! Of course, please do!" She shifted herself to the corner of the couch and created two more blankets, adding to the hundreds that already covered her. She motioned eagerly for the two of them to join. Eijirou made to sit down but noticed that Izuku was still standing where he had been. "Would you like me to make some tea or anything? I had a pot on in the kitchen a few minutes ago but It shouldn't take too long to heat back up"

"Oh, no, thanks for the offer though. I think the last thing I need right now is caffeine." Kirishima said with a sorrowful laugh.

"Hey man," he looked back to his sullen friend. "you gonna come sit down?" Izuku didn't respond but continued to stare blankly at the show. Kirishima sighed as he grabbed Izuku lightly by the arm and guided him over to the couch. If Izuku wasn't gonna move, he might as well sit down.

"They don't seem to get along very well." Eijirou asked concerned that a husband would yell so much at his wife.

"Well, they really do love each other. And before you get anything wrong, he would never do anything to hurt her. He's kinda like Bakugo in a way. All bark and no bite." Eijirou laughed out loud at that.

"Oi! The fuck do you mean 'all bark and no bight.'" Everyone jumped at the sudden shout from the stairs. Bakugo stood in the doorway, bags under his eyes looking more angry than usual. "I'll show you some fucking bite. You. Me. Right here, right now. Let's go pony tail!"

"Oh, Bakugo. I didn't realize you were awake." Momo said nervously.

"Yeah, well, it's kinda hard when you losers are making so much noise down here. The fuck are you watching anyway?" Bakugo walked in and looked at the TV. "Oh, I used to watch this show with the Old Hag. It's not terrible."

"It must be pretty good then," Kirishima said with a laugh. "'It's not terrible' has got to be the highest praise I've ever heard you give anything before."

"Shut up shitty hair, the fuck are you and Deku doing out here anyway?" Izuku seemed to retreat further into himself at Bakugo's mention of his name.

"Oh, we couldn't sleep. We had just gotten back from a walk around campus when Yaomomo invited us to watch with her. You want to join?" The redhead flashed a shark toothed grin. He doubted that Bakugo would want to join, but he figured it was worth a shot. Especially if there was a chance it would help cheer up Izuzu in any way.

"Fucking whatever," Katsuki stormed across the room and, to Eijirou's surprise, plopped himself down onto the couch next to Izuku, taking the last seat on the right edge. The force of Katsuki's landing bounced Izuku into the air slightly since he was right next to the angry blond. Izuku still made no movements and just stared blankly ahead, occasionally looking down at his hands clutched tightly against his shirt in his lap.

Katsuki was thankful that his English was pretty damn good. Not that he'd ever admit it to anyone, but he loved this fucking show and he was pissed that the Japanese subtitles never really seemed to get things right. "Lucy, I'm Home!" would become some shit like: "Honey, I've arrived." Honestly, whoever they had translated this shit needs to be fucking fired.

They sat on the couch and watched an episode. Occasionally one of the extras would try and get Deku to talk to them or some shit but it never worked. The nerd just curled up into a ball and stared blankly at the TV. Was the damn nerd even watching? Or was he just letting his fucking eyes glaze over. At one point, even he fucking tried to get Deku to come out of whatever mood he was in with no luck. Lucy had just opened the oven and this gigantic fucking loaf of bread just kept coming out of it until Lucy was pushed back against the wall screaming for her friend to help her.

"Come on nerd!" He punched Deku lightly on the shoulder. "What's wrong with you huh? That shit was fucking funny." Izuku let out the cringiest fake laugh.

"Ha, yeah, I guess." He returned to staring blankly at the screen.

Fuck, Katsuki knew what was going on in the nerd's mind. He knew it all too well frankly. He'd been doing it most of his life. He's trying to shut himself off from his emotions. Obviously, the fucking nerd was trying to shut down everything to limit his pain and, as a result, had turned himself into some kind of emotionless blah. Knowing Deku, if the nerd kept this up, he may never go back to fucking normal. Shit.

Katsuki decided in that moment that he wasn't going to let the nerd do that to himself. He wasn't going to let the light leave his eyes. Katsuki thought about how closing himself off from his own emotions for so long had fucked him up so badly. Frankly, it had ruined his life in a lot of ways. Katsuki was only just starting to realize that now as he sifted through the wreckage of what he once had. Fuck, he couldn't let that happen to Deku. He wouldn't.

Ok… So, I'll help the fucking nerd through this… Cool… Good idea. Great idea.. One fucking problem though…. How the fuck do I do that? Katsuki's mind raced trying to piece together some form of plan which didn't involve having to open up to the greenette emotionally.It was one thing to realize that someone was going through the same problem that you've dealt with. It was another thing entirely to have any kind of idea how to help them through it. Especially if it's still a problem you deal with yourself.

Fuck, he came to one conclusion and hated it. God, he hated it. He realized that the nerd had lost everything. Honestly, he had too. He didn't have much left. His dad was gone, his mom was in some asylum somewhere after her mental breakdown. But he still had Kirishima. At least Katsuki still had a friend. What did Deku have left? His mom? Missing or dead. Round face? Dead. Glasses and Icy Hot? Missing or dead. Who the fuck knows. The nerd had nothing left. Katsuki realized that the one thing that the nerd needed right now was… A friend. Fuck.

So Katsuki did the only thing he could think of in the moment. Something he should honestly have done a long time ago. He let go. He let go of all the hate for the shitty nerd… er… for Deku… Izuku? Fuck, that felt wrong. Maybe he'd just stick with Deku.

He let go of all the animosity and all the hatred that he could. Anything that he didn't think he could just drop, he boxed up like he usually did except this time he tacked a little note to it. I'll deal with you later. Honestly, by this point, he didn't even know why he had still held onto his hatred for Deku. It wasn't like the nerd hadn't proven to him by this point that he had never been looking down on him. That's what made him hate the nerd in the first place. So why did he still feel like this? What the fuck was he afraid of? His mind filled with images of the green-eyed smile of his childhood friend back when they were kids at the park. Fuck, could they ever actually go back to that? The uncertainty scared him.

"Deku," Katsuki croaked, ripping himself out of his own thoughts. "Uh, have you ever seen this show before nerd?" Izuku turned slowly to look at him. A perplexed look on his face.

"I… Umm. No, no I haven't. It seems interesting though." Katsuki sighed, this is going to be hard.

Katsuki tried his best to engage the nerd in conversation. He really did. There was one issue with it. He fucking sucked at small talk. He quickly discovered that unless he was preparing to yell at him, Katsuki couldn't think of a damn thing to talk to his former friend about. Katsuki tried and failed for what felt like hours. Eventually, everyone begun to finally start to fall asleep. Izuku was the first to go.

The nerd had curled into a ball onto the couch and was now asleep with his head on Katsuki's lap. He hiccupped with the occasional sob but other than that lay motionless on Katsuki's side. Fuck fuck fuck. What do I do. The damn nerds on me. I don't fucking like this. But…. He's finally fucking asleep… It's not like. I can just wake him up and tell him to fucking move or something. The nerd would have some kind of aneurism at the thought of inconveniencing someone else. He looked up and found shitty hair and pony tail staring at him. Shitty hair had the biggest smirk on his face, shark teeth peeking through the gap.

"Aww, you two make such a sweet couple." Kirishima whispered placing his hands on his face and pouting.

"Shut up shit face. The actual fuck. The nerd just fell asleep or some shit. It's not like I fucking asked for this." Katsuki glanced down at the sleeping nerd with a suppressed growl.

"Would you like us to help carry him up to his room?" Pony tail offered.

"Nah, s'fine. The fucking nerds been through a lot and needs at least one night of sleep without those fucking pain killers fogging his head. I'll put up with his shit just this once. Y'all fucking head to bed. Once I'm sure he's out I'll try and leave his ass so I can get some sleep myself." The others nodded and left for their respective dorms. Katsuki turned off the TV and sat there wondering how the fuck he got into this place. How the fuck he had decided he was going to try and be the shitty nerd's friend. Fuck me. Katsuki relaxed the best he could with the presence at his side. He kicked his feet up on the coffee table and closed his eyes. He needed to get some rest tonight one way or the other. Fuck, tomorrow was going to be awkward as hell if he couldn't get away from the nerd before morning.

Izuku was back in the void. Darkness surrounded him and ate away at his consciousness. He tried to move but to his horror he realized that this time he was the one tied to the chair. He was bound at his wrists and feet and had several wraps of rope around his middle securing him in place. Before Izuku could panic, the sound of voices ripped his attention away. One voice was terrifyingly familiar. The metallic voice of Tomura Shigaraki. The other? Izuku didn't know. He couldn't place if he'd heard it before. It was feminine but strong? In some ways her cadence reminded him of All Might.

"Listen you All American Bitch! Who the fuck cares if I can't actually separate his soul from his body now? Fuck you and fuck your lame ass order. I've got my own game to play and I don't need you meddling with the rules." Izuku couldn't see where the voices were coming from but it seemed to have been close by.

"Shigaraki, your reign of terror stops here." The feminine voice began. "I've crippled you once, I'll do it again."

"Yeah, about that. How are you here. I thought you died when you destroyed half my fucking quirks. You suck by the way." Half his quirks? Who was this? Was this a dream like before? Well, I don't even know if that was a dream. So… could that mean…. Izuku's frantic thoughts were halted by the woman's voice.

"The Spirit of Freedom can never be truly destroyed. As long as there is someone with the will to defy injustice. As long as there is someone with the drive to overcome evil. As long as there is someone in this world like young Izuku, you cannot destroy me."

"I don't need to destroy you! I just need you to leave me the fuck alone! You have so much god damned power but you're afraid to use it. I however? Not so much. I'm gonna beat this level and go on to win the whole game." Izuku heard the sound of running footsteps followed by shouts from the woman. Izuku felt power course through his body. Green lightning erupted around him as his quirk activated. Suddenly he felt a sharp blow to his chest. It felt like he had been hit by a truck. He flew backward into the darkness, chair screeching as it skid across the ground. As soon as the power had activated it left.

Izuku was alone. It was quiet. The voices were gone and he was alone with his thoughts staring up into the darkness. He felt… Off... Like he was less himself than he used to be?

Katsuki had barely been asleep for an hour when he was awoken by the sound of the elevator opening. The sounds of a ding, doors sliding, and hurried footsteps jarred him awake from his restless sleep. He quickly sat up to see who had dared to wake him from his sleep. He stared at the elevator and did a double take.

Deku stood in the elevator arms spread out at his sides looking up at the numbers on the display pad. He had a terrifying grin across his face and let out a small laugh as the doors closed plunging them back into darkness. Where the fuck was Deku going at this hour? Katsuki didn't get father with the line of reasoning than that before his attention was drawn to a loud snore from something next to him.

Fucking Deku was asleep drooling face first on the couch with his ass high in the air. What the fuck. I just saw. He. What? Katsuki looked around the dark room. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Everything was the way it was when he had closed his eyes earlier. But… But what had he just seen? Nearest he could tell, there were three possibilities. One, he was still asleep and this was all a dream. Two, he was going insane. Three, Deku had a twin. Knowing two and three were fucking impossible, Katsuki decided to do the only thing he could think of. He lay back down, wrapped himself in the blanket that pony tail had made for him, and he went back to fucking sleep. I'm too tired for this shit. Weird fucking dream. He thought to himself as he drifted back off to sleep.