ZISU


As Captain of the Security Corps, Zisu prided herself on the ability to always determine, without a shadow of a doubt, just what liked to chew the carpeting in Galaxy Hall.

Most who worked in Jubilife Village's central building had learned not to question her methods. If Zisu was down on hands and knees sniffing the fraying red edge of a square torn from its glue, she was doing important work. The same if she was rolling on the first floor from the left staircase to the right. Or if she decided it was worth ripping up more carpet to compare the jaw strength of known chewers. Or if she brought one of Tsumugi's fat rodents into the building and just let it chew the carpet some more.

She was in the middle of rapidly rolling between the staircases — the least offensive method, in the carpeting's opinion — when Captain Cyllene of the Survey Corps finally worked up the courage to emerge from her office and confront the wild woman about her nonsense.

"Nonsense," she told Zisu with a practiced scowl. "You're doing nothing to solve the mystery of what tore up the carpet on the bottom steps. All this rolling around is simply nonsense because you don't know what else to do with your time. I'd like some peace to get my paperwork done, if you please."

Zisu rolled to the middle of the golden emblem of the Galaxy Team in the middle of the carpeted floor. She popped up to sit with her legs splayed out before her. Scarlet curls had gone frizzy with static, and her cheeks had brightened to a similar cheerful rose.

"It's torn in patches," Zisu said. "All along the bottom stairs there are chunks torn out, and the stairs aren't symmetrical. That is, the torn carpet isn't in the same spots on each staircase. They're offset just a little bit, and lined up like something ran back and forth really fast between the staircases and got so excited about the idea that there were two of them that it couldn't decide on which one to tackle first and decided to zig-zag back and forth chewing both at once. So all my rolling is just me trying to figure out how rast it fan between them, and… rast it fan! How rast it fan! Haha! I'm having a good day, Cyllene. How about you?"

Zisu imagined that if Cyllene had eyebrows, she would've raised one. Or not. The stern eyes and pinched lips were her usual tools of command. Not that Zisu felt commanded in the least to stop her nonsense. She lay on her back and stretched all her limbs out as far as they would go. Then she gazed up at the wood paneling on the ceiling and thought about how very odd it would be if she could walk around up there, upside-down and smelling the blooms of lightbulbs.

"Must you conduct the investigation again? Or will you hurry up and conjecture it was another stray Bidoof that found its way into the building and put another hefty bill for carpet replacement on the Commander's desk?"

"Did you see a Bidoof, Cyllene?"

"It is the responsibility of the Security Corps to see them before they infiltrate our offices."

"But it's the Survey Corps's job to survey them. You should be out here rolling on the floor with me!"

"Captain Zisu, what will your children think of your behavior, once they get a little older and answer to a mother who spends idle hours mussing her hair on the carpet!?"

"They'll see their mama's a hard worker. Trying every solution until one works. Which is why, after all my consideration, I've determined it wasn't a Bidoof that chewed the stairs this time. It was a Bibarel! The Bibarel belonging to you, Bagin."

"What?"

The Security Corps officer who guarded the left-hand staircase put a nervous hand on his satchel. "But my Bibarel is safely in its Poké Ball! And the carpet was chewed when I got here!"

"Who crafted Bibarel's Poké Ball?"

"One of the Survey Corps kids. Rei, I think."

"Then get on Rei and tell him the Security Corps demands he craft his Poké Balls with more precision. Your Bibarel escaped when you weren't looking. It's hiding in Cyllene's office now."

Like a miracle, there came a faint guttural chittering noise from behind. Cyllene stiffened. Bagin blushed. Zisu stood up and dusted off her coat before retying her scarlet curls and giving them both a proud nod.

"I need a walk outside," said Cyllene then.

"I'll go with you," said Zisu.

"I'd rather go alone."

"You don't want to go out there unaccompanied! Especially when there could be more rambunctious rodents rolling around. You need Zisu to help stop the nonsense!"

She pushed the thin woman toward the door and followed her out into the warm spring air. Zisu's husband Bonn was down the street with his candy stand. Her twin boys tried to sneak pieces when he wasn't looking. Down the main avenue, the shops were all opening for the day. Cyllene walked with her head held high and her hands clasped at her sides. Zisu tromped along beside her, waving at Anthe and Choy and Arezu, who was slouching lazily outside the hairdresser's and singing to herself.

"Morning, ladies," came the gruff voice of Ginter, the Ginkgo Guild leader, sitting in his usual slump next to his cart. "Interested in any rare wares? Special price today. You can take anything out of my cart if you make that haircut girl shut up."

"CAN IT, GINTY! SINGING IS GOOD FOR MY HEALTH!" Arezu called.

"If you were any louder I'd start dropping my own rare wares on the ground and listening to them clang."

This brought a tiny smile to Cyllene's hard expression. "What do you have for sale today, Ginter?"

"What do I have? Oh, for you, Captain, I have the rarest ware in Hisui. It's in here," he said, electric blue eyes shining as he offered up a hand-carved jewelry box. "Go ahead and take a look inside."

Cyllene took it, letting her fingers travel along the ridges and curves scooped out of the wood with spoons and little whittling knives. Then she undid the gold metal clasp on the front and lifted the lid.

"It's empty," she said.

Ginter slouched forward, wrinkled face melting into a smirk that was infamous throughout the village and beyond.

"Right, because you don't have to pay for your own sass. I'll only sell you the box to put it in."

"Oooh, that's a hard bargain, Ginter," Zisu said, cheeks drawing tight around her smile. She playfully punched Cyllene in the shoulder.

Then Cyllene punched her back. Not playfully. Even Ginter was surprised to watch the thin woman wind up and throw a fist so quickly into Zisu's left ear there was an audible whoosh before the inevitable crack. The Security Corps Captain stumbled to her right. She cupped her ear with one hand and swung around with the other before realizing it wasn't a good idea to accidentally injure another friend that week.

"For your cheek, I'll be keeping this," Cyllene told the Ginkgo merchant. She then held up a hand before Ginter could make some smug rejoinder and briskly continued down the avenue, Zisu bounding after her.

"Hey, Cy. If you need me to chill, just tell me, okay? I like to lighten the mood. Sometimes it comes off as too much. You know that."

"Did that punch hurt you, Zisu?"

She puffed out her chest. "Not at all. I'm the toughest stuff around."

"Good," said Cyllene. "It was performative, you know."

"What? Oh, you don't have to pretend to be tough. I know you are. I may not be scared of you, but all those Survey kids are. And the professor."

Cyllene suddenly grabbed Zisu's shoulders, pulling her into the shadow of the last wooden house on the road. Now her lips were a little less tight, and her eyes a little less stern, and her prim short hair even a bit less prim.

"Do you think it would be possible for Bagin's Bibarel to escape into a particular place? Perhaps a merchant cart? And… pilfer a few things?"

"You mean pilfer absolutely everything?"

Cyllene nodded.

"If it's everything you're after, a Bibarel would be too bulky for such a task. But my Ambipom might be up for it. When were you thinking?"

"It's already inked in my schedule for dinner time."

"Cyllene!" Zisu cried, astonished. "You're talking about scheduling nonsense into your own day!"

"Some nonsense is acceptable to keep things orderly in our village."

"Well I'm glad you finally said it. I've wanted to prank that old man ever since his cart rolled in. I've got a whole list of ideas beyond simple thievery. Like gluing his butt to his chair. And dying his uniform pink. Ohhh… getting him drunk and then sending him down the river on a raft! Stealing his tinkering tools and scattering them around town and slipping him a list of mysterious clues for finding them! Getting Volo to copy everything he says and does! Bargaining for his wares with pine cones—!"

"Perhaps run these all by my office the next time you… roll in. They'll need official approval," Cyllene said.

Zisu would bring them in with somersaults.


~N~

Old Ginty.

Published by Syntax-N on FanFiction . Net May 19th, 2022. Reposters cursed.