Astonishingly, no one tried to kill Arthur in the next few weeks and life developed into something approaching routine. Merlin would be woken up by his phone and would have breakfast with Gaius. Then he would jog over to the Porter to pick up any post and the daily papers, which he would then take back to Arthur.
He would be as obnoxiously cheerful as possible when waking Arthur up on the basis that a) he forced Merlin to be out of bed earlier than otherwise and therefore needed retribution and b) Merlin found it was deeply satisfying.
To his surprise, Merlin discovered that his attitude to Arthur had changed and was changing. The incident with the homeless guy had astonished Merlin, especially when Arthur hadn't even demanded that the guy change his ways, and neither had he asked for the guy's life story. Instead he had helped the young man and had started taking an active interest in homelessness and charities that offered help. It made Merlin actually start believing that Kilgharrah was telling the truth. Maybe Arthur was a force for great good.
After helping Arthur with his morning routine, during which Arthur would assign a list of tasks to be done, Merlin would head off to his other life where he listened to lectures, got involved in discussions in seminars and supervisions, spent as much time as humanly possible in the library and waited for Kilgharrah to give him some more information about the whole Merlin/King Arthur thing. Kilgharrah, however, kept running actual supervisions about ancient texts, which annoyed the crap out of Merlin, whilst simultaneously fascinating him.
In the evenings he trudged back to the Lodge to complete any tasks he hadn't had time to do during the day – he had never done so much laundry and ironing before – and on Thursdays he served at the evening meal with Arthur, Uther and Morgana. Occasionally there were Formal Halls and Merlin was now pressed to serve Arthur at the high table, although the college butler tended to give him things to do that ruined fewer table cloths. He generally got the water jug.
Then, on the Wednesday morning before 2nd November, Arthur reminded him that he was due to go to this rally thing. Mostly on weekends Merlin watched Arthur throw himself into karate, squash, tennis, or rugby and during the week he had to wash/clean/repair/replace the equipment and clothes after the practices for these sports. Sometimes he had to call in at the sports shop opposite Sidney-Sussex. Arthur was an all-round sportsman for whom moderation was a dirty word. His drive to perfect his performance was huge and Merlin got tired just watching him. He also got cold, dirty, teased rotten and pretty bored as well, but at least Arthur was allowing him to bring some of his Uni work or books.
Every now and again, Gaius would show him a bit more magic and he could now light a fire and levitate stuff without getting it lodged in the ceiling. It was fascinating and he was still only barely able to believe it.
"On Saturday you need to be here early," Arthur told him around toast in bed. Arthur was still of the opinion that Merlin was rubbish at his job – mostly because he didn't always arrive early, sometimes forgot stuff, was clumsy, didn't seem to know the difference between all the incomprehensible fashion labels that made up his wardrobe and finally, because he was never shy about telling Arthur what he thought of him.
"How early?"
"We will be leaving at 8am," Arthur smirked at Merlin's grimace. "We have to go to Hatfield to get the car ready and then we will head into London. We have a suite reservation at the Cumberland and then we have to be in Hyde Park by sunrise to drive to Brighton."
"Sunrise….?" Merlin questioned in horror.
"Yup!"
"Why so early? And why? And why do you need me? I can't drive."
"The rally begins at sunrise, so we need to be in Hyde Park by sunrise," Arthur answered, ticking off the responses on his right hand. "Because I said so and I need you to run in front of the car with a red flag."
Merlin just looked at him, until Arthur laughed. "OK, that was a joke. You have to have two people in each car in case of breakdowns and trouble. I'm taking Aunt Emily."
"Who?"
"Emily is a Wolseley 2 cylinder 6 horse power almost two seater car from 1905 and you will need to wash her and valet her before we set off."
"Joy," Merlin sighed, although secretly, he thought the whole thing actually sounded quite interesting. Not as interesting as trying out magic again, but still, not something he had ever done before.
"And you will be wearing this," Arthur grinned, holding up a horrible looking chauffeur's uniform with goggles. It was like an oversized raincoat with weird sleeves and off-white in colour.
"But you'll be doing the driving," Merlin pointed out, "so shouldn't you be wearing that?
"No, I'm the Viscount and you're the servant. It is always done in costume. At least, it's always better if done in costume. And you'll need warm clothes as we will be outside all day."
"I don't really have to do this, do I?" Merlin asked hopefully.
"Yes, you do. I have already entered your name and anyway, you are paid to do as I tell you, remember?"
"Yes, Your Lordship," Merlin bowed insolently. He had been grilled by George and then, more terrifyingly by Uther, on his comportment while on their time, but Arthur was more amused by him and just insulted him at will.
So, on Saturday morning he ran through the whole routine and packed his rucksack for the weekend, tucking a book or two in the pack just in case. He and Arthur clambered into the Porsche and they headed down to Hatfield to a garage where they met Gwen's father, Tom.
Tom and Arthur talked a lot about the car and the mechanics etc while Merlin tuned out through having no clue what they were talking about. Tom kept calling Arthur 'my lord' quite sincerely, which freaked Merlin out a bit. Then he was shown the bucket, speciality polish and sponges and told to get on with it.
The rest of the day was spent preparing. Merlin was on packed lunch duty and general cleaning while Tom and Arthur worked on 'Aunt Emily', diving into her workings and fiddling, revving, shouting, replacing and generally doing engine type things that Merlin couldn't even begin to understand. Then Merlin was bundled back into the Porsche and they both hurtled down the M11 to get to the Cumberland as Arthur wanted to go to the Motor Show on Regents Street.
Merlin had initially decided that he would just stay in the suite and read, but then he realised that they would be sharing with Uther and suddenly the Motor Show seemed really interesting.
That evening Merlin and George served at the table in the suite while Arthur and Uther waxed lyrical about the cars, the time trial (which they were both competing in) the Motor Show (damn! Uther had gone to it too) and things generally about cars. Apparently they were not doing the same route as each other, so they had a wager about who would get to Brighton first. Even George's professional face looked decidedly fixed with boredom by the end of the meal.
Merlin, George, Tom and Gwen (who arrived with her father and the cars) all ate together in the restaurant afterwards and Gwen proved highly knowledgeable about the cars too. Merlin did offer his place in the car to her, but she told him that she and her father were on call to help if either car broke down.
They all had an early night with George and Merlin sharing a room. They had to be up and ready for the pre-dawn assembly and there would be preparations to be made before the dawn kick-off.
The day itself was actually much more fun than Merlin had anticipated. Arthur had tried to get him to wear a fake moustache for the Movember charity that the race was championing, but he had refused point blank, so Arthur just donated money and threw the fakes away.
The atmosphere was charged with enthusiasm and excitement which was catching. Arthur drove Aunt Emily slowly out to join the other cars, parking in his place according to his number, then Merlin and George stayed with the cars while Uther and Arthur, dressed in their long coats with cape sleeves, went to watch Alan Titchmarsh and the Chairman rip a red flag. Arthur explained that it was symbolic as the first run had been to celebrate the emancipation of car drivers – they didn't need to have a man with a red flag running in front of them and the speed limit was raised.
And then they were off. Merlin was surprised that Arthur was content to drive at such a slow speed, but while it was true that modern cars could out run them in first gear, the car didn't actually feel as though it was going slowly. The day was beautifully warm, even though it was November, and Merlin thoroughly enjoyed being outside and driving along. There were spectators all along the route, waving and taking photos and it felt joyful.
Uther and Arthur split at Kennington with Arthur on the original route and Uther taking the alternative, then North of Croydon the run came back together and Arthur was thrilled that he had beaten his father to Croydon. They were phoning each other all day and throwing insults about each other's driving, complaining about the modern day drivers who were slowed down by them and generally enjoying themselves. Merlin took a load of photos on his new phone and sent a couple to his mum and one to Gwaine.
Crawley was great fun as there was a real party atmosphere there and hundreds of spectators were watching the progression. The South Downs were beautiful and, although they had a minor issue going up one of the hills where Merlin had to get down and walk, the drive went well and they arrived in Brighton at more or less the expected time. Arthur was annoyed to have lost the time trial, going well over his 10mph limit, but at least Uther didn't win either. They were all awarded medals and then they displayed the car and ate the packed lunches.
Merlin and George then had to clean the cars again and finally they were loaded up into the lorries for Gwen and Tom to drive back. Gwen took Arthur and Merlin back to the Cumberland to pick up the Porsche and then they were finally on their way home.
There was a pall over the run when it turned out that a long time enthusiast had died in a crash during the day, but it had still been a great occasion and one which Merlin would never have even known of without Arthur.
Merlin had learned a lot about Arthur during the drive. He had seen how driven Arthur was to succeed, how he was desperate to please his autocratic father and how hard he worked for Pendragon FS, but he had also seen the enthusiasm and pure delight in his eyes at doing this run. It was all entirely for fun and Arthur was able to let go and just be himself. It made Merlin feel that, actually, having some kind of destiny that linked him to this man wasn't a curse after all. Maybe it really would be a better world for having Arthur in it.
Week 5 was notoriously particularly hard for Cambridge students and Merlin was no exception. Many students found the trials of university work and life hard, but not all of them had what amounted to a pretty intensive job on the side. Some students worked in bars or as waiters, some did the silver service thing and most had spent most of their Easter and Summer holidays working so that they could have more time during the term. Some had a lot of extracurricular activities that filled their weekends. Merlin was pretty sure that none of them spent their Saturdays cleaning golf clubs, washing rugby kits, cleaning shoes, laying and lighting fires and generally having things thrown at their heads.
Bedevir and Pellinor, at the Formal Halls, were talking about their nights out at the weekend, telling tales of drunkenness and dancing and they had brought a friend along. They even invited Merlin to go with them at the next weekend.
"You don't seem to go out at all!" Beddi laughed. "You sad sack!"
"You can't just work all the time," Pell argued. "You need to have some fun too."
"I went on a vintage car run last weekend," Merlin offered quietly. "Does that count?"
He had decided to go and sit for the Formal Halls for once as Gwen and George were helping Brian, the college butler, with serving the top table and Arthur was away at a business meeting in Paris. He felt bad for spending his few pounds on this, but everyone said that it was part of a student's life and he realised that he knew barely anyone at the university. A few familiar faces in the faculty and no one else. Well, except for the two idiots with stupid names who were sitting opposite him.
"That must have been interesting," their friend, who was sitting next to Merlin said, his brown eyes lighting up.
"Oh, this is Lance," Beddi introduced. "He's our guest. We met him at the Junction last week."
"What did you see?" Merlin asked politely.
"A band called Plastic Bananas – they were pretty awful actually!" Beddi (who actually wanted to be called that) said as the Master stood for Grace.
Merlin didn't look at Uther, not wanting to catch his attention and, after Grace, the first course arrived.
"Lance here," Pell said, "is another member of the crap name brigade."
Merlin looked over at the (gorgeous) guest who grinned winningly and told him, "it's short for Lancelot!"
It felt like a blow to the stomach. "Lancelot…?"
"Yes," the young man with the sparkling eyes laughed. "I know, when I heard their names, I had to get to know them." He nodded at Merlin's acquaintances.
"That's…" Merlin struggled for words. "I mean… you do know that the Master's name is Uther Pendragon?"
"Yes?" Lance agreed, not seeing the connection.
"His son is Arthur," Merlin added.
"Lancelot and Arthur…" Lance mused. "Does he have a girlfriend called Guinevere?"
"That's Gwen over there, serving at the top table. The lady to Uther's left is Morgana Le Fey-Pendragon."
"You have got to be kidding me," Lance scoffed. "Where's Merlin then?"
Merlin blushed and waved his fingers. "That's me," he introduced himself, grinning.
"You are not Merlin," Lance refused to believe it, so Merlin got his library card out.
"Does that make these two clowns knights?" He asked. Beddi and Pell were scraping out their soup bowls and ignoring Lance and Merlin who were in their own world.
"I don't know. This is my first Formal since Freshers' Week and I sat here because they were the only people I had met before," Merlin explained.
"I thought there were loads of Formal Halls," Lance frowned.
"There are, but they aren't free. I have a job, but it doesn't pay actual money, just accommodation and dinners."
"Are you not a student then?" Lance frowned.
"Oh, yes, I'm doing ASNaC…" he explained what it was. "And you?"
"I'm… I'm doing Sports and Exercise Science. I'm in my fourth year."
"Which college?" Merlin asked and realised from Lancelot's wince that he had asked the wrong question.
"I'm at ARU," Lance explained quietly.
"That's OK isn't it? I mean, does it matter in the end?" Merlin tried to backpedal. Anglia Ruskin University was the 'other' university in Cambridge.
"I did well at A Level," Lance shrugged, his eyes smiling, "but not well enough for Cambridge and then I didn't really have anywhere else to go. I had lodgings here, so I chose ARU."
"I know how that feels," Merlin commiserated.
"I really wanted to come to Cambridge. I thought I would do better, but I wasn't good enough." Lance sighed. "When these guys invited me to a Formal Halls, I thought that at least I would be able to see what I was missing. I also sing in a chapel choir at Robinson College, but it's not the same."
"You know, they do a graduate conversion course for people who have a degree from somewhere else. You study for two years, a bit like doing a Masters and then you get a Cambridge degree," Merlin remembered. He had initially thought that he could save some money by going to Uni in Belfast and living with his mum, but then he had passed the Cambridge exams.
Lance looked thoughtful. "Can you get loans for that?"
"I don't know," Merlin admitted. "But it would be worth it, wouldn't it?"
"I'll look into it. I have my finals in the summer. So, which year are you in?"
"First year. It's tough. Especially as I get yanked out to work all the time," Merlin smiled.
"How does that work? You said you get paid, but not in money?"
It was Merlin's turn to look thoughtful and he took the distraction of having the courses changed to reflect on what he was going to say. It helped that it was Gwen who came over with his Veggie option.
"Gwen!" Merlin grinned.
"I brought you yours because I knew who you were!" She smiled. "Mr Student Posh-guy!" she teased.
"Gwen, this is Lance," Merlin introduced and there was definitely interest in both pairs of eyes. Merlin could understand it, they were both beautiful people.
"Is that Gwen, as in Guinevere?" Lance asked
"Yes," Gwen curtseyed. "That's me. I thought you weren't going to tell anyone Merlin!" She slapped her friend's shoulder.
"Well, this is Lancelot! He has to become a member of our Camelot gang!" Merlin explained and saw the smiles on both faces.
"It is peculiar," Lance said musingly. "That all these Arthurian names have gathered here."
"Maybe it's just because this is Camelot College?" Merlin suggested disingenuously .
"I have to get back to Uther and my lady," Gwen confided. "I don't know how you got out of it."
"Arthur's away, so I thought I'd try it out," Merlin told her. "Are you eating afterwards?"
"Yes – think of me when you all clear off home."
Of course, their conversation left Lancelot with more questions.
"Are you going to explain?"
Merlin considered that and then decided that at some point he was going to have to introduce everyone. Lancelot was supposed to be a good friend, wasn't he? Although everything he had read on the legends suggested that Sir Lancelot was a medieval invention to the myths.
"Gwen works for Morgana as her maid," he began. "And I work for Arthur as his…um… servant."
"Wow, really?" Lance asked. "Do people still do that?"
"Apparently," Merlin shrugged. "It's a bit weird, but… it's better than having to pay back humungous student loans."
"I guess…" Lance reflected. "What do you have to do?"
So Merlin told him about the fun of waking Arthur up, the disastrous first few days and the car rally. He also told him about the homeless guy and Gwaine and admitted that he was beginning to actually respect Arthur.
"It's Lord Uther who is completely terrifying," Merlin confided. "Even in the legends he's the bad guy, but here he's just a business man who is a control freak."
Pudding arrived and they all appreciated the ice cream treat.
"Gwen will be pleased, this is one of her favourites," Merlin grinned, scraping out every last scrap. "Would you like me to show you around after dinner?"
"I'd love it," Lance agreed happily. "Can.. um Gwen join us?"
"She will be eating after this in the kitchens. It's a perk," Merlin grinned. "You can get seconds there as well."
After coffee, permission was given to leave so Merlin headed towards the exit, although he abruptly turned around as Uther left so that Uther wouldn't spot him. They left in his wake and went to the tower where Gaius lived.
"Coffee? Tea?" Merlin offered as they arrived in Gaius' rooms.
"Is this yours?" Lance asked, impressed, fingering a bundle of drying herbs. "I only have a room and a shared bathroom."
"No!" Merlin laughed. "Gods, no! This is Gaius' room. He's like an extra supervisor or mentor for me. He's been here forever and he has the use of these rooms for as long as he wants. He's retired Fellow."
"He doesn't mind us being here?" Lance asked.
"No, I camp in his office. He's a doctor, specialising in Homeopathic healing and he has a patients cot, so if he ever has a patient, I go and stay in the room next to Arthur's. Thankfully it doesn't happen very often."
"Go on," Lance encouraged, accepting tea.
Merlin grinned. "If Arthur knows I'm only next door, he tends to add extra chores for me to do. He's a total control freak too."
Merlin grilled Lance on his university experience and showed interest in his course, thinking that Arthur would have enjoyed something technical but fun instead of his Economics degree. When Gaius turned up they started talking medical matters until Lance realised the time and agreed to come back for a proper tour sometime.
Once he had gone, Merlin got the eyebrow of doom.
"So, who was he?" Gaius asked, expecting a blush and an expression of romantic interest.
"Lancelot."
Both of Gaius' eyebrows were raised in surprise and Merlin took the argument further.
"So, Gwaine must be Gawain, Bedevir and Pellinor are at the college, you, me, Gwen… it's not a coincidence is it?"
"No," Gaius agreed. "When is your next supervision?"
"With Kilgharrah? Monday. I need to know what is going on. I need to understand…"
"Have you had any more dreams?"
Merlin shook his head, "But… well, I'm expecting one tonight."
So far he had dreamed disjointedly about Gwaine, Arthur, Kilgharrah, Arthur, Uther, Arthur, Gwen, Arthur… like his subconscious was trying to tell him something.
Gaius considered this and then asked, "Have you ever dreamed about me?"
"No…" Merlin answered, surprised. "But when I had those flashes in Kilgharrah's office, you were in those, always giving me good advice."
Gaius grinned in amusement, "Well, of course I was." He poured himself a cup of tea and held it out to Merlin. "Try not to explode the cup this time?"
Merlin grinned and concentrated and the tea cup remained intact. Gaius added milk and sugar and then sipped the hot beverage contentedly.
As soon as Merlin's lectures were done for the day, he decided to go and see if Kilgharrah was free.
"How can I help you, Young warlock?" the old academic asked.
Merlin felt another shiver of recognition run through him.
"Warlock?"
"You are a special type of magician, Merlin. You were born with your magic and you use it instinctively, sometimes without any incantation. You will grow stronger as you practise."
Merlin nodded and thought about it.
"Have you been practising?"
"Yes, sir," Merlin answered happily. "I can levitate things and I managed to warm Gaius' tea last night without exploding the cup. I keep adding too much power to things and… there are holes in Gaius' ceiling."
Kilgharrah laughed, which Merlin found a bit disturbing – like he could sense the academic's sharp dragon teeth. "You have been supressing your abilities and now your magic wants to please you. This time you are hiding your abilities for a very different reason."
"What do you mean?" Merlin pounced. "Can you tell me more about… about 'last time'?"
"I can do that. When you were created, you…"
"Wait, created?" Merlin interrupted.
"You were created. You were born of a man and a woman, but you were created as an embodiment of Magic."
Merlin considered that. "You make it sound like I am some kind of object."
"You are in a way. You are Magic and you are here to form Arthur who is Courage. You are surrounded by Love, Craft, Balance, Wisdom, Strength and Nobility. All of these people are here to create Albion who is personified in Arthur."
"That's… that's ridiculous!" Merlin argued. "I'm me… I'm human! There is more to me than just Magic!"
"Of course there is," Kilgharrah soothed. "and it is your humanity that makes you perfect for Arthur."
"Am I supposed to fall in love with him?"
Kilgharrah chuckled. "You can if you wish, but that is not your purpose."
"I… I am not sure if I want to have a purpose." Merlin scowled, feeling a bit annoyed. Where was his free choice?
Kilgharrah gave him one of those searching stares. "You don't have to accept your destiny, but you cannot escape the fact that your soul was created to serve Arthur's."
Every time he heard that sentiment, Merlin felt his heart flip, as though there was some deep truth in the statement, but still, loyalty and service; both were very outdated ideals and out of step with modern times. "If I don't… what would happen?"
Kilgharrah answered calmly. "Then the world will have lost out on a beautiful age of tolerance and justice. People will suffer when they needn't have and many will die unnecessarily."
Merlin felt as though someone had placed a boulder on his chest. "That's… that's not fair!" he argued, his breath catching.
Kilgharrah watched him for a few moments. "Accept your destiny, Young Warlock. Take on the challenge."
"What is in it for me?" Merlin asked, almost weeping at the unfairness. "What do I get out of it? Arthur will get the glory and the… the riches and the … whatever. Do I just stand in the back, applauding politely?"
"Are glory and riches what you truly desire? I told you before, Merlin. You yourself once said that it is better to serve a great and good man, than to rule by the side of an evil one. Your conflict with your Lord will make you stronger. You work behind the scenes, but never fear; the age you create will be the stuff of legends and your role will be known and lauded." He paused for a moment. "Do you enjoy the spotlight?"
"No! Gods, no!" Merlin answered instantly.
"Here, read this."
Kilgharrah pulled out a lever arch folder that was stuffed full. Merlin took it and realised that it was a copy of an ancient text.
"The book itself is in stasis in the Crystal Cave, but I made this copy so that you could read it. I did it with a camera back in the 20s and I have made copies every now and again, but only you and I can read much of it as it is in the Language of the Dragons and you are the last Dragon Lord."
Merlin clutched it as though it was a new born baby. "What is the book?"
"It is your magic book. It has the spells and advice that Gaius was given when he was young and you annotated it and added to it. There are tales and amendments from Before."
"From… the First Time?" Merlin asked, hardly daring to breathe.
"Indeed." The former dragon steepled his hands and contemplated his student. "What brought you to my door today?"
"Lancelot."
"The truest and most noble of Arthur's knights. Lancelot saved the world on his own last time, although he really did it to save you."
This was too much for Merlin, who just felt like he had been punched.
"I think you need to go and reflect on this. You may have noticed that I have not set you work to do as other supervisors would." Merlin nodded. "Your destiny and your purpose are much more important and I will award you the scholarly grades as though you were truly working on your degree. Is there anything else you wish to ask me?"
"No… not yet…" Merlin breathed.
"We have an important mission to accomplish soon. I will arrange it with your master."
"You mean Arthur?"
"Indeed," the dragon nodded and Merlin gave a nod in return. "You may call upon me when you wish, but I believe you may need to go and read for a while."
"Yes… thank you, sir."
"You may call me Kilgharrah," the dragon reminded him. "I too have a destiny and that is to be your guide and support."
"Thank you," Merlin said again and he left, clutching the innocuous looking folder to his chest.
Flicking through the folder, Merlin discovered that it was, as Kilgharrah had suggested, a book of magic, but it was also a kind of diary. It was written in various languages, some in a kind of Celtic Brittonic, some in early Welsh, some in some kind of Viking language that looked a lot like the Saxon tongue, some in Latin and some in Dragon. He could see the Dragon as it was written in that same loopy script that the prophecies had been written in and it took him a moment to… switch his brain on to be able to read it. It was a bit like one of those Magic Eye pictures that his mum loved where you have to see the hidden 3D image behind the pattern.
The Dragon tongue entries were the ones that told him about his past life. He read the first one that told the story of Lancelot because that was where his mind was.
According to the book, Lancelot had always wanted to be a knight and Past Merlin had tried to make it happen for him. After the ignominy of failing to be a nobleman, he was eventually knighted by Arthur on his own terms, along with Gwaine and two others called Elyan and Percival. They were the true Knights of the Round Table.
Merlin looked for more information about them, but was distracted by a note, in dragon, marked 'Read this Big Ears'.
Big Ears? Really?
He read it and fell down the figurative rabbit hole.
You are me. You will be me. If you are reading this, then I have implemented the Plan. Arthur will come again and you need to be there to see it happen, so you will be a few years younger than he is. Arthur is a good man and a great King. He's a prat and a Cabbage Head, but he is a prince, so what else would he be? He is a hero and a noble man who wants to do the right thing and you need to be there to make it happen.
Arthur is a good master. You may not believe it, but I have worked for others and no one has ever been like him. He may give you a list of chores that would crush 100 men, he may never show you that he cares, but he cares. He will always come for you when you need him and he will fight to save your life, all the while thinking you to be simple and defenceless. I always believed that my destiny was to bring Magic back into the world, but that is only a tiny part of the story. It is about the creation of the Legend. I have already lived through centuries, but the tales told about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table are enduring and inspiring, and behind it all, they talk of Merlin the Enchanter – his greatest ally, his best friend and his most loyal servant. I miss Arthur. I miss him every day.
We were created to serve him and I told him once that I was content to be his servant until the day I died. I have not died, Merlin, I have merely begun again.
Merlin fell asleep hugging the folder.
Lance sent him a text while Merlin was cleaning the whole team's rugby boots – yes, thanks for that Arthur, sure, I'd love to do that – and he invited Merlin to meet up after the service at Robinson College chapel on the Sunday. Merlin still had to arrange it with Arthur, and was astonished when Arthur said that he'd come too.
The service was lovely and Merlin and Arthur both surprised the other by taking communion. The chapel was like a modern red brick castle with amazing stained glass windows and the choir sat at the foot of the 'castle walls' in front of the organ and sang very professionally.
"Which one is your little friend then?" Arthur hissed during the sermon.
"Dark curly hair and he really isn't little."
"Ooh, I didn't know you had such intimate knowledge."
Merlin blushed and wished the ground would swallow him up… or maybe swallow Arthur.
They met outside in the quad afterwards.
"Lance, this is Lord Arthur, he wanted to come too," Merlin shrugged and Lance turned his smiling eyes on his former King. Just as with Gwaine, there was some kind of subliminal recognition there and they smiled and shook hands.
"You are the one who pushes Merlin around and makes him clean 100 pairs of rugby boots?" Lance asked.
"He enjoys it!" Arthur grinned, jostling Merlin.
"Yes, I live for it," Merlin groaned, causing both men to laugh.
"Right, back to the Mill for Sunday Lunch, I think," Arthur declared. "My treat."
Merlin looked at Lance who shrugged and they both followed Arthur back to the river to the pub by the lock.
Merlin had been correct. Arthur was fascinated by Lance's degree course and they talked football for ages while Merlin went to get drinks and order food. It was strange how Arthur didn't seem to see his own friends anymore. He seemed much more interested in Merlin's. Merlin hadn't even seen Owen, or whatever his name was, since the first day at the college. It made him wonder what it was about Arthur. He didn't seem to have 'mates' even among his sports crowd, even though nearly every Saturday evening saw a bunch of them turn up in Arthur's room to watch… whatever it was and throw beer and popcorn at each other. Merlin loved Saturdays as much as he loved cleaning rugby boots and he had been up till late the night before making sure that the beer stains would come out of the carpet. And who doesn't enjoy fishing popcorn out of the sofa?
With Lance, however, Arthur was clearly enjoying himself and there was an easy rapport between the two men. Lance enjoyed sports and had become a fanatic supporter of Cambridge United football club, but he claimed to not be that good at them. Of course they ended up challenging each other to a game of squash and another of tennis.
"What about you Merlin?" Lance asked, suddenly realising that Merlin was listening rather than joining in. "Which sports do you play?"
"Merlin doesn't do sports," Arthur grinned, answering for him. "He is only barely adequate as a caddy."
"Being a caddy is much easier when you only have one set of clubs to lug around," Merlin growled. "But I agree with Mark Twain; golf is just a good walk spoiled."
Arthur and Lance laughed at this and Arthur swatted Merlin's arm.
"I've never played golf," Lance admitted, while Merlin pretended to rub the sting away. "I think I generally prefer team sports. I was on the hockey team for Uni last year, but I have finals this year, so I relinquished my spot."
"I've never really tried hockey," Arthur admitted. "I don't have time for another sport."
"He's missing out on a game of golf for this," Merlin told Lance. "I think he doesn't like being out in the rain."
"I'm not the one who spends the whole time complaining!" Arthur argued mockingly. "Merlin doesn't like being outside. He'd much rather curl up with a book written in squiggles."
That was very true, but Merlin was quite surprised that Arthur had noticed. "It's mostly runes or clerk script," he corrected. "And I love being outside, just not chasing little white golf balls into lakes and brambles."
"Dusty old bits of paper with shopping lists on," Arthur teased.
"Some of those 'bits of paper' are over a thousand years old!"
"True, now go and get beer, and have something other than orange juice yourself," Arthur commanded, so Merlin approached the bar, grinned and ordered apple juice instead.
Arthur got a text from his father and hustled off, magnanimously allowing Merlin the afternoon off, but commanding him to be back at the Lodge that evening.
"I thought he was going to pay?" Lance complained, grinning as Arthur left.
"I have his credit card," Merlin replied with an understanding smirk.
"How do you put up with him ordering you around like that?" Lance shook his head. "I know you like him, but doesn't that drive you mad?"
"Oh yes," Merlin affirmed. "But… I've seen great qualities in him. He has capacity for great kindness and for good, but he hasn't learned enough about real life yet. All he has ever known is privilege and wealth and he just hasn't grasped the concept that not everyone has a guaranteed job, security, safety. He knows intellectually that he is highly privileged, but he doesn't see it. When he does see need, though, he does something about it."
Lance looked at his friend and contemplated what he had said, before saying, "You really think that he can be… like King Arthur?"
Merlin choked on his apple juice. "Where did that come from?"
"You are Merlin Emrys, he is Arthur, I'm Lancelot, you've met Gawain, Morgana, Guinevere… it's not a coincidence is it?"
Merlin looked around the half empty pub and then leaned forwards. "I… I can do magic," he admitted.
Lance stared at him in shock. "What? Like… Harry Potter?"
"I don't have a wand, but…" Merlin gestured to his spoon and his eyes flashed. The spoon floated two inches above the table. Lance just stared at it in wonder, then he placed his hand underneath the spoon, over the top, all around it.
"I… I don't believe it!" he hissed and Merlin let the spoon fall back down.
"It's taken me a few goes to get that right. A week ago that would have shot up and stuck itself in the ceiling!" Merlin grinned self-deprecatingly. "You… you aren't afraid?"
"No… I'm fascinated. Who knows?"
"You, my mum, Gaius and Dr Kilgharrah, my supervisor."
"Your tutor? At college?" Lance asked, shocked.
"He… he showed me a prophecy and he gave me a magic book. There's a letter to myself from me in it."
"Arthur?"
"Not yet… I will tell him," Merlin answered, a strange feeling of longing building up inside him.
"You sound like some kind of loony!" Lance said, but not unkindly.
"I feel like it sometimes, but seriously… you don't mind?" Merlin's face looked even younger as he stared hopefully as his friend.
"Mind?"
"That I told you? I… I don't really have anyone else and…"
"Merlin, I'm your friend. I've read all the stories, even that really tough one about Sir Lancelot Du Lac and that's in Medieval French."
"I'm reading it in the original Medieval French as a part of my degree, and I'm hoping to be able to see the manuscript they have in the British Library. I've only seen it on line and it's beautiful."
"But Lancelot was made up," Lance argued. "He doesn't even appear before the 1100s."
Merlin smiled knowingly, "Kilgharrah put it all into perspective for me. Maybe the truth is hidden beneath a whole load of lies. Someone decided that the truth was too dangerous and so the myth grew… and then it grew. What we did back then has become a tale that is still told even now."
"What we did?" Lance breathed. Merlin nodded and smiled, a little distracted by Lance's glowing, excited eyes. "You really think…?"
"I know. Sir Lancelot, the bravest and noblest of all the knights."
Lance looked away. "That's… well, it's not me, I know that! I have read all kinds of stories and I have seen that weird film, Excalibur."
"Oh God… Merlin in that…" Merlin cringed. "He has this kind of tin head thing! My mum bought it for Christmas one time…"
"And Lancelot has the shiniest armour that never grows dull!" Lance laughed. "Do you think that Gwen…?"
"Lance, we are not doomed to repeat that time. I truly believe that we are gathered for a reason and that certain things may well happen as before, but, we don't have to be the same. I read about what happened to the Lancelot of then, the real one. He gave up his life to save the world. Literally. It was partly because he wanted to help me… him… and partly because he was in love with Gwen, but she chose Arthur. You don't have to give up anything – I really don't think that anyone is going to rip open the gate between the afterlife and Cambridge." Merlin finished his apple juice. "Come back and we'll do that tour and I'll show you the copy of the book."
"Merlin, why are you showing me?" Lance asked. "We only just met."
"Because you are the bravest and noblest of all the knights of the Round Table," Merlin smiled, "and I like your hair."
They stopped off in Robinson College on the way back because Merlin had only seen the chapel. It is one of the newer colleges and Lance showed him the features that resembled a castle, including the dining hall. Then they headed back to Camelot and Merlin showed him the old church that was now the chapel and the Fellows' garden. He introduced Lance to Leon, who was on duty and then was turning away to head back to Gaius' tower when they heard "MERLIN!"
Merlin looked all around and finally worked out that Arthur was shouting from his balcony.
"Yes Sire?"
"Get up here!"
Merlin turned and shrugged apologetically at Lance. "His Master's Voice."
"I heard," Lance laughed.
"I think the whole of Cambridgeshire heard! Can you come to the English Faculty tomorrow at about 4pm? I'd like you to meet Kilgharrah."
"MERLIN!" Merlin felt like he was being tugged in Arthur's direction.
Lance thought, and then nodded. "I'd like that."
They said quick goodbyes and then Merlin jogged off to the Lodge's kitchen entrance.
The next day, Kilgharrah was waiting for them with a cup of tea and the second of the pages from his secret cupboard. Lance entered the room with curiosity evident and expressed surprise.
"I was sort of expecting you to have a wood panelled office filled with swords and magical items," he said accepting the tea.
"Some of the supervisors and Directors of Studies have those in various colleges, but the English faculty is a relatively new building. West Road was developed about twenty years ago," Kilgharrah told them. "So, you are Sir Lancelot. Yes, I remember meeting you before you threw yourself into the veil."
"That wasn't me, sir," Lance argued. "I don't think I would be brave enough to do anything like that."
Kilgharrah laughed his deep, throaty laugh. "The noblest and bravest, and yet the humblest of all the knights. You were always ready to defend even servants, even then."
"Can we show him the picture?" Merlin asked and Kilgharrah nodded towards it. Merlin picked the frame up and showed it to Lance.
"What is this?"
"It is a picture that was painted 1500 years ago," Kilgharrah explained. "It has been carbon dated and there can be no doubt."
"But that's you, Merlin," Lancelot's hands were shaking and his beautiful eyes were scared. "And that's Arthur and… me!"
"And that's Gwaine," Merlin added. "And that is Kilgharrah," he grinned, pointing at the dragon.
"Merde… Je… I'm… I'm struggling…" Lance admitted, running his left hand through his hair agitatedly. "This is… it's too weird…" he turned his dark eyes back to Merlin. "Who.. who else knows?"
"I might tell Gwaine when I next see him, but apart from you, there's no one else," Merlin answered.
"What about Arthur?"
Merlin looked at Kilgharrah, who replied. "Arthur will be told when it is time. Last time, Magic was punishable by death and Merlin had to hide his nature, even from Arthur."
"Especially from Arthur," Merlin put in. "He'd have chopped my head off!"
"This time, though, magic is not the issue," Kilgharrah told them wisely. "There is no penalty to fear."
"Apart from being carted off to a nut house," Merlin muttered and Lance chuckled.
Kilgharrah carried on without smiling. "I was wrong."
Merlin looked up in shock and Lance switched his gaze between the two of them and swore in French again under his breath. When Kilgharrah was ready, he explained.
"I misinterpreted the point of the prophecies. I thought that Albion was a land where Magic was free, dragons could protect and serve and the people would be left in peace. I thought that your destiny was to bring back Magic. I was wrong."
"It's not just about Magic," Merlin suggested.
Kilgharrah smiled. "That is correct. When Arthur died the first time, I thought that we had done all we needed to do, that Magic was revealed and accepted, that Guinevere would carry Arthur's legacy. I hibernated in the Crystal Cave and knew that I had fulfilled my purpose. But although Guinevere was a great Queen and she knew about your magic, she was not a Pendragon by blood and Albion failed within a lifetime."
"I had a dream about her," Merlin admitted. "I dream snatches of very vivid dreams… I dreamed that she told me that she had worked out that I had magic and that she would champion its revival. She was nearly overthrown for even suggesting it. In my dream… I ran away."
"I was not there for the aftermath," Kilgharrah admitted. "I truly thought that my work was done."
"I dreamed about Arthur… I keep dreaming about his death." Merlin hung his head. "I dreamed about you Lance. I dreamed about your death last night."
"It wasn't me," Lance insisted, but Merlin carried on miserably.
"Arthur was determined to mend the tear himself. He was going to throw himself into the void and offer his life to make up for… I don't actually know who she was, but she opened the thing and let all the angry souls out. You met Kilgharrah as a dragon that night," he told Lance. "Gwaine tried first, but she… it… the old ragged woman… she blasted him away. Then Arthur tried and… and I stopped him with magic. Then, while I talked with the woman…"
"The Calliach," Kilgharrah supplied.
"Yes, her… she called me Emrys and…. I don't really remember, but while we spoke you… Lancelot… he stepped through the hole with a smile on his face… and saved the world."
They were all silent for a moment.
"It wasn't me," Lance repeated eventually. "I'm not a knight, I'm just a future PE teacher."
"Oh," the ex-dragon laughed. "You are much more than that!"
Kilgharrah quizzed Lance on his life and choices, learning that he had a mother in France, but that he hadn't seen her for a long time. He had come to England because his father had been British and he was bilingual and had dual nationality, and university degrees from the UK sounded better. He had lodged with an old friend of his Mum's in Trumpington and attended Hills Rd sixth form college, then only managed A*BB at A level, so missed entrance to Cambridge University.
Then, finally, Merlin's phone beeped at him and he sighed.
"I'm late," he told them. "Arthur is home and I haven't ironed a pile of shirts for tomorrow. My destiny this time appears to be all about Arthur's fashion sense."
Lance laughed and patted his back, saying that they would meet up again during the week.
Merlin sighed as Arthur lectured him about being late and the terrible state of his shirts, which were a pig to iron and even though George had shown how to do it, Merlin just couldn't get the bloody things to go flat. Arthur was showing him every single crease, every single last gather that was flattened and all the collars that weren't crisp enough. Merlin had lost a few of the collar stiffeners in transit and that was wrong too. As he removed the shirts that Arthur had flung at his head and ducked the DVD case chucked at him (maybe telling Arthur that he should just iron them himself hadn't been the wisest course of action), Merlin made them into a more manageable armful and resigned himself to another evening of battle with the steam iron thing that made no sense to him. He might have been more accepting if he didn't have a translation and an essay due tomorrow, neither of which he had even started yet.
He set up the ironing board and the steam contraption and started flattening the stupid things out again. He wasn't sure that the end result was any better – there were fewer creases and it seemed flatter, but the gathers were still sitting awkwardly… he was never, ever going to buy shirts from anywhere except Tesco, or maybe Next for a special occasion he decided, as the more expensive the shirt, the harder the damned thing was to iron.
He set the iron down and listened… there was someone in the house. Admittedly, there were at least six people legitimately in the house, but someone was sneaking around who shouldn't be there. They must have come in through the kitchen entrance which was usually locked with a pretty sophisticated lock… unless there were deliveries being made.
Merlin's heart was hammering, but he had to go and see what was going on. With any luck it would just be one of the security guards raiding the fridge while Audrey was away, but his instincts were screaming at him that it was someone with a nefarious purpose.
The door clicked a little as he opened it, but there was no one in the passageway that led into the kitchens. To get to the main part of the house, the intruder would have to go through the kitchen and up the stairs to the main hall. If he was going to go up to the main bedrooms, he would be best off going up the servants' stairs, however, to get to any of the rooms hiding the family treasure, the intruder would have to cross the main hall and there would be a guard on the door.
Merlin made his way quickly through the kitchens, but he didn't see the intruder. He looked out of the window in the kitchen doors, through which he would be able to see the main hall entrance, but he still couldn't see anyone. He was beginning to wonder if he had been mistaken, but then he saw that the fire door to the servants' stairs was closing.
In order to get ahead of the intruder, Merlin decided to go up to the main hall and use the main staircase. It was more direct and he could be quickly in place to see the person come out of the stairwell. He just crossed his fingers and hoped that Uther didn't spot him where he shouldn't be.
There was an alcove, the one where Morgana had dragged him a few weeks before, and he made it there before anyone came out of the stairwell, but no one did. That meant that either the person was quicker than he had thought or slower.
A man with longish hair, wearing black jeans and a black polo-neck jumper, pushed the fire door open and looked around. Merlin had jerked back as soon as the door started to open, and he waited for the man to go past him. The intruder was definitely sneaking, but he also knew where he was going. He went straight past Merlin and headed down the corridor towards Morgana's room. Merlin had to make a decision. Should he wait and see if Morgana was expecting this person? Although, given that he had snuck in rather than coming in like an invited guest, Merlin thought that he had some kind of dark purpose… or maybe he should just…
He knocked on Arthur's door and went in. "Arthur?"
Arthur was playing on his game console. "Merlin? What the hell are…? You made me lose a life!"
"Arthur, there's someone in the house. He's gone into Morgana's room."
Arthur came to the door. "Someone? Who?"
"I don't know, but he crept in through the kitchens," Merlin told him.
Arthur took charge immediately, which Merlin had expected. He pushed Merlin behind him and stormed off towards his adopted-sister's room, banging on the door in a way that Merlin would never have dared.
Morgana came to the door and she looked flustered, but that could have been because Arthur was suddenly banging on her door. "What?" she demanded.
"Are you OK?"
"Yes!" she insisted. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Merlin said he saw someone coming up to your room."
Morgana looked at Merlin and frowned, which was not something he usually got from her. She was usually really friendly. "What kind of someone?"
"He came in through the kitchens… um… my lady," Merlin was feeling rather flustered himself now, so he thought a bit of formality might help, especially as Arthur was glaring at him now. "He came this way…"
"There's no one here," Morgana said firmly. "Have a look!"
Arthur gave it a moment's thought and then said, "Can I just quickly check?"
"There's no one here! Don't you think I'd notice if someone came into my room?" Morgana opened the door and allowed them both to peer in.
"I'm sorry Morgana," Arthur apologised. "It's Merlin's stupid imagination."
"I suppose I should be glad that you are quick to defend me, although I can defend myself, you know."
Arthur cuffed Merlin on the back of his head and then dragged him back to his own room.
Merlin was still rubbing his head when Arthur rounded on him and Merlin remembered that he wasn't Arthur's favourite person this evening already.
"You ever embarrass me like that again and …"
"You'll have me sent down," Merlin nodded pulling his arm away.
"Look, Merlin, just stick to what you do best… NOTHING!" Arthur raged, wagging finger and everything.
"But I didn't imagine it," Merlin said sullenly. "There was someone there. He had long grey-blond hair and…"
"Merlin, shut up!" Arthur went back to his game. "And go and iron those shirts!"
Merlin grimaced and then headed off back to the stairwell, but he stopped at Morgana's room and listened. It may have been her TV, but Merlin was pretty sure that he heard voices in there.
Back down at the laundry room, Arthur's shirt now had a large, iron-shaped hole in it.
So, not only did he have to listen to a long tirade about how completely useless he was and how he was the worst servant in the world ever, but he also the next day had to go and grovel to two of his lecturers and hope that they would give him at least a day of extension. One of them agreed, but the other was really nasty and recorded a zero entry. He was informed that if he missed another deadline, that his DoS would be informed and he would have to be interviewed.
Merlin worked in the library over the lunchtime slot and then tried to do some more while recording the afternoon lectures on Beowulf and Norse, then he worked after the lessons finished for the day, performing hopelessly in his Welsh class, and arriving late to serve Arthur in the evening.
"I'm going to take the cost of the shirt out of your wages," Arthur told him as he ate. "That was a hundred pound shirt."
"I don't have a hundred pounds, sir," Merlin blushed, devastated. "Or wages," he added softly.
"What do you mean, you don't get wages? Are you some kind of moron? One of those idiot savant types that shouldn't really be here?"
"Your father pays for my tuition and food. I don't get any actual money," Merlin explained quietly, actually feeling as though he might cry. He was standing in his 'please-don't-look-at-me' pose, with his hands behind his back and his eyes lowered miserably.
There was silence. Merlin just wanted this day to be over, or maybe to not have happened at all.
"There… there really was someone in the house yesterday, my lord," Merlin added unhappily.
Arthur got up and stood in front of Merlin, contemplating him. Then he grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the table to sit on the chair opposite his own. Merlin felt the tears well up, but he fought it. This was what got him into trouble with bullies and the people who had always made him feel so pathetic. He couldn't help that his emotions tended to overwhelm him sometimes and he had a huge feeling of 'not fair' running though him at the moment. He tried to hide his face.
"You look thoroughly miserable," Arthur said softly, and that undid Merlin completely. He wiped away a tear and tried to hide his face. "Do you truly not receive money?"
Merlin shook his head and tried to clear another tear quickly so that Arthur would not notice.
"When did you last eat?"
Merlin had to really think about that, because he hadn't had time that morning, or at lunch, or the previous evening and he would have to get to the dining hall soon if he wanted to get anything for dinner, unless he could persuade Gaius to share with him again… but that wasn't fair on Gaius, who already…
"Hey…. Stop!" Arthur commanded and Merlin wondered if he'd said all that aloud. Crap, he hoped he hadn't… "Is this just about the shirt?"
Merlin shook his head again.
"Tell me," Arthur demanded.
"I… I failed to hand in an essay… I got a zero… and I have to do a translation and another one and Welsh and I think my Welsh teacher was angry too and…"
"Week 5," Arthur nodded. "It happens to everyone," he added kindly.
Merlin wanted to add that he missed his mum, that his bed was really uncomfortable, that he had run out of clean underwear and had no way to buy anything, that he was worried about his destiny and that he felt really guilty relying on Gaius. Gaius had asked him to deliver an elixir to a friend of his and he hadn't had time to do it, so Gaius was annoyed with him too. He had no idea how to do half of his job and…
"I don't know how to make the shirts flatter. George can do it, but it just doesn't work when I try," he wailed.
Arthur pulled him over and ruffled his hair.
"You really are a crap servant, but you just have a way of demanding protection," he let go and Merlin pulled himself upright, surprised to be feeling marginally better. "What was that guy like who visited my sister last night?"
"I don't know… he just came in through the kitchen and he was creeping about. I just thought… if he should have been there then he would have come in through the front. He went up the servants' stairs too."
"You are right," Arthur mused. "If he were one of Morgana's friends, he would have been escorted in and he would have used the main stairs."
"You believe me?" Merlin looked up hopefully.
"Yes, I do. I went back after you had gone and there were voices in there, but they didn't sound threatening, just… conspiratorial." Arthur ate another mouthful of his steak and kidney pie. "Is Audrey still here?"
"It's her night off," Merlin answered, not really paying attention.
Arthur picked up his phone and dialled a number. "George? Get a plate of food up here for Merlin…. No, he just hasn't eaten and he's going to faint like a delicate flower… Do you want this?" he pointed at his own dinner and Merlin suddenly realised that the question was aimed at him, so he shook his head.
"Vegetarian," he admitted.
"OK, rabbit food for Merlin…." Arthur said into the phone. "Also, there are three shirts that need to be ironed… I thought you probably would." Arthur rang off and looked at Merlin. "He's done the shirts, so that's one less thing to worry about. Now, your classwork. Do you have it here?"
Merlin nodded.
"Then go and fetch it and work on it now. If you don't get it done, it will just make you feel worse."
His bag was tucked behind the cushion-chair that Merlin thought of as his next to the fireplace, so he got up and fetched it. By the time George had arrived with a second tray, this time containing a cassoulet that Audrey had made for him and frozen, Merlin was half way through his Welsh homework and Arthur was finishing up his meal.
"Thank you, George," Merlin said gratefully. George was a stuck up weirdo who oozed professionalism and pride, but Merlin had discovered that the man was always ready to help. "Thank you so much!"
George gave a slight smile, which Merlin knew was like a big grin on anyone else, and then he bowed to Lord Arthur and asked if he could do anything else. Arthur shook his head and George left knowing he had served well.
"I wish I could be like him," Merlin sighed.
"Oh god, no!" Arthur protested, "He's so boring! Really, he enjoys his job and he makes horrible jokes because he thinks it makes him more human! Honestly, Merlin, you might be crap at your job, but at least you're interesting!"
"I'm not used to being crap at things…" Merlin confessed. "Except PE…"
Arthur laughed and ruffled his hair again. "Finish your boring beans, then finish your homework. I'm going to go and find my father."
Given how awful Merlin had been feeling when he entered the room, he felt as though his heart was light again and that he could face his life after all. He finished his Welsh and then finished the late essay, typing it up on his laptop and tweaking it, feeling a bit more confident about it now.
When Arthur came back, he slammed the door shut and Merlin got the impression that things hadn't gone well with Uther, so he stood up deferentially.
"I love my father, but sometimes he can be a… a complete arsehole!" Arthur grumbled. "Get on with your homework!"
Merlin actually smiled a bit and sat back down, finally feeling as though he was back on track. By the time Arthur was ordering him about to get him ready for bed (and that was a whole new aspect of life as Arthur's valet), Merlin had two essays pretty much completed and his Welsh and Futhark work done and dusted. He also emailed his now completed missing essay.
"Is there anything else, sir?" He asked formally once Arthur was ensconced in bed.
"No. Are you OK now?"
"Yes, thank you, Arthur… I'm sorry," Merlin nodded.
"University life is pretty hard on its own, I know that. Take the trays down and get some sleep tonight."
"Yes sir," Merlin replied again and he gathered up his things and the trays and left the room. He stopped off to wash up the plates as the dishwasher had done its job much earlier on, grabbed a glass of water and then made his way out.
On the way out, though, he realised that the kitchen door had been wedged with a little wad of paper so that the lock wouldn't catch. He took out his phone and took a photo, which he then sent to Arthur, he removed the scrap of paper and made sure that the door was locked.
The next morning, he was woken up by hearing his name being yelled.
"Merlin! Gaius, where is he?"
"What's wrong Arthur?" He heard Gaius shuffling about. It was still dark outside.
The door to Gaius' office was flung open and Arthur came striding in, switching the light on, then going straight to Merlin's bed and throwing the covers off. Merlin blinked and pulled himself up.
"What's going on?" he asked, rubbing his eyes. "Am I late?"
"No, but the police are here and they need to talk to you!"
"What? Why?" Merlin pulled up his knees and tried to wake up.
"That photo you sent me. When did you see the door left like that?" Arthur demanded, pacing.
"Um… oh, when I left you last night," Merlin replied, making to get up, suddenly aware that he was only wearing boxers and a t-shirt. "What's happened?"
"Someone has stolen a big crystal thing from my father's office and he's spitting feathers. The police are investigating and filling in forms and stuff, but you need to get dressed to get to the Lodge."
"Right… OK… give me a couple of minutes?"
Thankfully, Arthur and Gaius left the office and Merlin was able to fling a pair of jeans on and change his t-shirt. He fished out some socks that weren't too smelly and his jumper, grey coat and trainers, and he was as ready as he was ever going to get. His hair was going to be a mess, whatever he did and it was getting a bit too long now. He spent a moment wondering if Gwen knew how to cut hair, and then scolded himself for wool-gathering. Two minutes later, he was entering Gaius' sitting room and Arthur leaped to his feet.
"Finally!" he grabbed his servant's arm and started dragging him out of Gaius' tower.
It was way too early to have to deal with Uther, Merlin reflected as he stood awkwardly in front of him in his office. The policeman, a Detective Constable Lomax, was clicking a pen and writing down Merlin's details as Arthur gave them to him. Merlin carefully voided the thought that Uther, Arthur and the policeman all got to sit down…
"So, Mr Emrys," the cop said, sounding as though he thought that Merlin had stolen the 'crystal thing'. "What can you tell me about the intruder?"
"I noticed him two nights ago sneaking in, sir."
"Did you not stop him?" Uther asked menacingly.
"No, my lord, I didn't know where he was…" Merlin tried to explain. "I heard him, but I didn't see him."
"And where did he go?" Uther asked, fully implying that Merlin was being a moron. "Where the hell is my daughter?"
"Lady Morgana?" Merlin gulped.
"Where is she, you imbecile?"
"I… I didn't know she was missing…" Merlin stammered.
"What happened with this intruder, Mr Emrys?" the policeman asked, intervening.
"He went up the servants' stairs, sir, so I ran up the… um…" he stopped, realising that he was about to incriminate himself with Uther. "I went up the main staircase just so I could beat him to the top, sir," he finished in a rush. He saw Uther frown, but he would have to worry about that later.
"And did you see him?" the policeman asked, and Merlin thought that he sounded a bit annoyed.
"Yes, sir," Merlin admitted.
"What did he look like?"
"I didn't see him well, sir. He had greying blond hair that was quite long and messy… it brushed his shoulders. He had really blue eyes, a short beard and moustache and he was wearing black."
The policeman was making notes, so Uther asked accusingly and condescendingly, "and what did you do?"
"I realised that he was heading for Lady Morgana's room, so… I… um… I went to fetch Lord Arthur."
"You didn't accost the man yourself?" Uther asked angrily and Merlin tried really hard not to flinch.
"No, my lord, I… I didn't think I would be able to do much. I thought that Lord Arthur would …"
"He came straight to me, Father," Arthur interrupted. "I knocked on Morgana's door and she told me that there was no one there."
"So your idiot servant just made it all up?" Uther demanded, scowling at Merlin.
"No, I don't think he did," Arthur argued calmly. "I think that Morgana was lying."
Merlin would never have dared say those words to Uther. Uther doted completely on his adopted daughter and would never, ever in a month of Sundays believe anything even slightly dodgy about her. Even Arthur wasn't really getting away with it.
"I told you before, Arthur, there was no one there. This boy has made up a story and you are going along with it." Uther looked at the policeman, who was still making notes, and continued. "I made a mistake thinking that a mere waiter could be a proper servant for my son. He's an idiot."
"He's a Cambridge University undergraduate, Father," Arthur pointed out and Merlin kind of loved him for it.
"He must have cheated. Gaius falsified his records."
"No… no he didn't, sir!" Merlin gasped in horror. It wouldn't take much for Uther to completely ruin him if that accusation were to be heard by his faculty. Academic honour was a fragile thing and reputations were immensely important.
"I think that I had better get this to the DS," the policeman interrupted, looking at Merlin. "Your employer has given me your phone number, so may I phone you if I have any further questions?"
Merlin was still trembling from the devastating accusation, but he nodded at the policeman and stood back so he could leave. This left himself, Arthur and a very angry Uther in the luxurious office, so Merlin tried to blend into the background as the argument reached boiling point.
"You can't accuse Merlin of cheating, Father. He has done nothing of the sort and he earned his place here."
Hm, it was nice that Arthur was defending him.
"But he's blithering idiot!" Uther waved his hand in Merlin's direction and Merlin curled himself a bit smaller again. He hadn't realised that people actually said 'blithering' any more.
"He is very bright, Father, but not very worldly. I told you, he's learning. He is both respectful and obedient." Oh, and now Arthur was lying for him! To his father! Merlin tried to look respectful and obedient.
"He's a liar," Uther growled. "He's clearly useless and very shifty."
"If you sack him, Father, then I will employ him myself. I told you last night. I like him and I am keeping him in my service."
"Then you're a fool, Arthur. A complete fool."
To Merlin's relief, Uther swirled around, glared at Merlin and then stormed out of his own office.
"I'm sorry, my lord," Merlin breathed, shaking.
Arthur didn't say anything, but grabbed hold of Merlin's arm and pulled Merlin out of the office and up the stairs. Merlin balked at climbing the forbidden staircase, but Arthur just tugged and Merlin followed. Respectful and obedient… right…
In Arthur's room, Arthur flung himself on his own sofa and waved at the armchair, indicating that Merlin was to sit.
"Morgana is protecting that guy and Father thinks that the sun shines out of her arse, so he won't hear a word said against her. He's no happier with me than he is with you."
"I'm not an idiot," Merlin complained softly, perched on the edge of the armchair.
"Yeah, well, that's debateable. But the photo you sent me was much more interesting than my father's and sister's lies."
"You saw it?"
"First thing this morning. Then my father came storming upstairs shouting about some missing crystal and the only person who is missing this morning is Morgana."
"What is the crystal?" Merlin asked, frowning.
"I have no idea, but Father thinks that it holds the answer to something… or maybe he can make something… I don't know!" and Merlin could see how much it bugged him that he didn't know. "All I know is that our mystery man and Morgana stole the thing and my father won't hear a word against her."
There was a moment of silence, which Merlin broke.
"I'll go and fetch your breakfast." Arthur nodded, clearly pondering the theft, and Merlin got up and left.
Merlin met Gwen in the kitchen and realised that she was really upset because Morgana was missing.
"She would have told me if she was going anywhere," she argued. "She's been abducted!"
"Do you know anything about the guy who broke in?" Merlin asked, sipping a welcome cup of tea.
"Nothing, but Arthur's right; there was someone there. The bedroom was tidy, so she went away willingly, but… her visitor left a scarf behind."
"A scarf?"
"The Police have it now. I don't know what it means, but it's not Morgana's."
"A university scarf?" Merlin asked.
"Yes… but a really old one. I mean he must wear it all the time."
"Do you know which college?" Merlin pressed.
"Arthur said it was Essetir. Does it matter?" Gwen asked.
"Camelot and Essetir are always trying to beat each other," Merlin shrugged and finished off his tea. "I'd better get up to Arthur. He's a bit short tempered at the moment. Gwen…." Merlin lowered his voice. "Did she have a dream?"
Gwen looked wide-eyed at Merlin and then looked around quickly. Audrey was in the freezer store, so she shuffled a little closer to Merlin and told him, "She had a dream about a boy with really blue eyes and a bunch of people in cloaks, all standing around in a forest. She said that the crystal was all wrapped up in a leather pouch and she was handing it to this cloaked guy."
"She dreamed…" Merlin breathed.
"Sometimes her dreams seem to come true…" Gwen blushed. "I know it's stupid, but…"
"No, it's not stupid. She really does seem to dream…" but Merlin had a feeling that this was one of those dreams – one like his where he saw flashes of 'Back Then'. "I've got to get to Arthur. I'll let you know if I hear anything."
"Thanks, Merlin. I'll look through her room again…"
Arthur was shouting at people on his phone. Merlin placed the breakfast tray he had brought for him on his desk and was astonished when Arthur grinned at him, almost saying thank you. He then went through the normal routine: make the bed, clean the bathroom, gather up breakfast (and dinner) debris, picking up Arthur's clothes – until it was time for him to head out to his classes. He picked up his satchel and donned his coat and scarf and would have left except that Arthur interrupted his own phone call and put it on mute.
"Merlin," Merlin stopped, "I have an idea… Morgana told me about a house boat on the Cam. That might be where she has gone… if she hasn't actually been abducted. I'm going there in about twenty minutes. I just wanted you to know where I am going to be."
Arthur went back to his phone call and Merlin made a quick decision and rang his DoS. It took some persuasion, but eventually Dr Monmouth agreed that Merlin needed some compassionate time and that he would let the staff know. He also sent a text to Kilgharrah.
"You're going to be late for classes," Arthur commented as he picked up his coat and gloves.
"I'm coming with you," Merlin told him.
"What? Why?" Arthur asked in surprise.
"You might need help," Merlin shrugged.
"How would you be able to help me?"
"I can protect you," Merlin suggested. "Or at least ring the police if it goes wrong."
Arthur gave him a searching look (and Merlin suddenly understood what that meant as he felt like he had been scanned like a document) and then slowly nodded. "OK… but you do as I tell you." He emphasised his point with a finger that almost went up Merlin's nose.
"Don't I always?" Merlin asked with a small smile.
Arthur still looked a bit bemused, but he nodded and led the way out of the college.
"Why do you think she's there?" Merlin asked as they reached St Giles' church and waited for the pedestrian crossing to turn in their favour.
"That guy you told me about," Arthur explained. "When you said about the beard and the long hair… well, Morgana said that she had been talking to some weirdo cult people who thought that she might be a seer or something. I told her that they were just trying to con money out of her, but she claimed that all they had asked for was a description of her dreams."
"Her dreams?" Merlin asked, surprised that she had mentioned it to her brother. They had a tumultuous relationship at the best of times and Merlin could see that Arthur wouldn't have been at all sympathetic to her claims about her dreams.
"She thinks that her dreams are telling her the future," Arthur admitted. "It doesn't really matter how I feel about it, but she really believes that there may be something in it, so… what if she has gone to ask these… people, for help?"
"Do you think they asked for the crystal as payment?" Merlin suggested.
"I don't know. Maybe? My father won't tell me anything about it except that it has been in our family for at least two hundred years."
They made their way to the river and crossed over to Midsummer Common.
"This isn't exactly unexplored ground," Merlin commented as they reached the other side. "These boats are often here."
"I didn't say it was. These nutters just like to live on boats and in tents. They probably commune with the trees or something," Arthur grinned.
"I thought they would be hidden away somewhere," Merlin pondered and Arthur stopped him.
"You know something," Arthur accused.
"What?" Merlin responded, shakily.
Arthur stepped closer and Merlin actually felt a frisson of fear, which made him shiver with cold. Arthur did all kinds of martial arts and sports training and his face said that he would be trying out his moves on his servant… and Merlin felt intimidated and as though his loyalty was being tested. He felt as though he needed to tell the truth.
"Lady Morgana told me about her dreams, sir," Merlin didn't even realise that he'd slipped the 'sir' in there. "She told me… about Lady Sophia. She asked me to watch out for her and to make sure that… you know…" he stepped backwards as Arthur moved forwards.
"And this intruder?"
"She didn't say anything about that, sir! Honest!"
Arthur swivelled around as though he was surveying the land around, then he swung back and spoke through clenched teeth. "Don't you ever keep things from me again."
"I didn't think you'd believe me," Merlin muttered sullenly. This loyalty thing was hard work when he really wanted to push Arthur back and tell him to leave him alone. "I haven't even spoken to her since the Sophia affair."'
Arthur grabbed his arm roughly again and marched off along the river, past the boathouses and towards the moorings.
There were several boats moored. Some narrow boats, some pleasure boats and a couple of larger barges. A few had signs of life, with smoke coming from chimneys and lights on inside, but others were firmly shut and barricaded. There was one large barge that attracted both men's attention. It was painted a pale green and had an open end facing the town and a clothes line with what looked like rough cotton shirts, a couple of pairs of trousers and a long skirt fluttering in the cold wind.
Arthur muttered something about it being large enough, but Merlin pointed to the name on the stern.
"Y Cwch Gwyrdd…"
"What?"
"The name of the boat… the Green Boat in Welsh."
Arthur stared at him for a moment, and then turned his attention back to the boat. "It's sometimes hard to remember that you aren't actually an idiot," he said and then carried on before Merlin could answer that. "We need to hide and watch this boat. They can't stay on it the whole time."
"How?" Merlin shivered. "It's too cold and exposed here."
Arthur didn't answer, but set off, striding away towards the footbridge, so Merlin jogged to catch up, hiding his cold hands in his pockets. The sun was trying to peak out behind the clouds, but as it was winter, it was losing the battle. He found himself envying Arthur's puffer jacket that looked really cosy, and wishing that he had thought to put a second t-shirt on. Of course, if he'd known he'd be rushing about the Cambridge common, he'd have just put every item of clothing he owned on…
They crossed over the footbridge and then took the first left, which took them along the road that led to the boathouses and rowing clubs. There was a fence along the back of one of the houses and, by ducking behind it and next to a car parked along the roadside, they could easily see the boat they were spying on. Merlin crouched down and wrapped his arms around his knees, not quite sitting on the road, while Arthur looked over the fence.
"It's a shame they haven't got any boats out," he commented, "we could have hidden behind those."
"Maybe we should come back with your car?" Merlin muttered, his voice betraying his shivers.
"Yeah, 'cos that would be totally inconspicuous," Arthur drawled sarcastically. "You can go home if you want."
Merlin shook his head and wrapped his arms closer around himself.
Nothing happened for a very long time. They took it in turns to look over the fence and then crouch down for warmth, and the clock ticked on until Arthur's phone said it was 2pm.
"Go up to the main road… um… Chesterton Rd, and get me a coffee and a sandwich. Beef or something. And a chocolate bar… a Twix or a Mars."
Merlin just looked at him for a moment, then, reminding himself that he was paid to obey Arthur's petty desires, asked, "Latte? Sir?"
"Yes," Arthur didn't even look around. "I'll phone you if anything happens, so keep your phone handy."
"Yes, sir," Merlin responded. At least walking would warm him up a bit. "Can I use your account?"
Arthur looked as though Merlin was bothering him with minor details, but he nodded. "Get on with it."
So Merlin trudged off to the main road and found a sandwich shop. He had been hoping that Arthur would invite him to get something for himself, but he hadn't and Merlin had 47p in his pocket. He just sighed and ordered the beef and mustard sandwiches to be made up, with a latte and some of the posh crisps that the Viscount liked. He had to pop into the Co-op for the Twix and he sighed when he realised that 47p wouldn't even buy him a chocolate bar. He could probably have argued that he assumed Arthur meant him to buy something for himself, but he had really had enough of being shouted at and belittled. He'd get something when he got back to Gaius', or go to the dining hall.
Arthur didn't phone, so Merlin wasn't surprised to find him still watching the boat. Merlin took over watching and Arthur hunkered down with his lunch, clasping the coffee for warmth. Merlin didn't watch Arthur, but he missed the warmth of the coffee cup.
It wasn't until it began to get darker at about 3.45 that they finally saw movement. Merlin was ready to just give up by this point, he was cold and miserable and even his book on the Mabinogion wasn't helping, but the door on the front of the barge opened outwards and a figure in a green… well, it was really a cloak… exited and jumped off the boat onto the bank. Arthur, who was watching, kicked Merlin, who stuffed his book back into his satchel and got up.
He was in time to see the man set off toward the town.
"Well?" Arthur asked.
"It does look like him. He's got the right colour hair and the length… I can't see enough to be sure."
Arthur didn't give him any time to prepare, but dragged him along behind the boathouses until they got to the end of the row and had to go in front. This brought them much closer to their quarry, who was heading for the other pedestrian bridge. By going in front of the boathouses, they were exposing themselves to view, but Merlin was able to get a good look at him as he crested the bridge, avoiding the cyclists who weren't dismounting. Arthur pulled him back behind a sparse winter tree and asked without words. Merlin nodded and hissed. "It's him."
They waited until he had disappeared up the road and then Merlin asked, "Now what?"
"Now we go and find out whether Morgana is there by choice or not."
"What? We're going to just ask?"
"No, you are," Arthur smirked.
"What?" Merlin asked in a disbelieving tone.
"Have your phone out in your hand. I'm vibering you now. Keep the camera on and I'll be able to see and hear what you do. You go and ask if Morgana is there."
"I can't do that! What if they're dangerous?" Merlin argued.
"Then you get out and I call the police," Arthur replied as though this was the most normal thing in the whole world, already dragging Merlin half way across the bridge. "Come on, they're not going to harm you – why would they?"
"They might have abducted Morgana!"
"Morgana may not even be there, but we need to know."
"Arthur…" Merlin hissed as they approached the boat, but Arthur was already slipping behind a tree, so he breathed in a couple of times, answered his viber call and stood before the boat.
"Emrys!"
Merlin jumped about and looked around frantically for the voice… even though it sounded as though it came from inside his head.
"Emrys!"
"Who's there?" Merlin demanded, his heart beating so hard he thought Arthur could probably hear it through the phone.
"Don't be afraid. Come in."
"What the hell Merlin?" came Arthur's voice from the phone and Merlin took a moment to work out his priorities.
The door opened and a small boy in a turquoise cloak, with the bluest eyes Merlin had ever seen, beckoned to him.
"Who are you?" he asked, but the boy didn't speak. He just smiled and held the door open.
It was warm inside and the boat smelled of a wood fire. There were three figures in there apart from the strange boy and Merlin peered through the gloom as the whole place was lit only by candles.
"Welcome Emrys," a dark-skinned man said clearly.
"Um…hello? Um… my name is Merlin. Emrys is my surname."
"We know who you are," the man bowed and replied. "My name is Aglain."
"Is… is Lady Morgana here?" he asked bluntly. "It's just that we're worried about her and…"
"Yes, Merlin. I'm here," Morgana said, appearing through a door at the end of the barge.
"Oh thank God!" Merlin breathed. "Are you alright? Do you need to be rescued?"
Morgana laughed. "No, definitely not! These are my friends. They call themselves Druids and I came to them to ask for help."
"Arthur?" Merlin spoke into the phone, but it seemed to be out of range and the picture had frozen with the little wheel whirling around.
"Your technology won't work here," the second man explained. "We aren't going to hurt anyone, but we use magic and you can't let radio waves and high frequencies interfere as the magic gets distorted."
"Can I ask my… um friend to come in?" Merlin asked and blushed when Morgana chuckled at him.
"Your master isn't ready to meet us," Aglain smiled.
"Why does everyone call him that?" Merlin groaned.
"Because we remember," Aglain told him calmly. "We remember what happened and we are here to make sure that it doesn't happen again."
"You… you remember the First Time?" Merlin breathed, excited. "You know who Arthur is? And Lady Morgana? Are you immortals?"
Aglain laughed and Merlin was happy to see that his eyes danced with mirth. "Sit down and we shall explain."
"I… um… I should go back to Arthur," Merlin decided sadly. "I can come back, but he's going to come and storm the place if I don't let him know that his sister is OK."
"And you wonder why everyone calls him your master!" Morgana teased. "Aglain told me that your loyalty lies with him and him alone, but I didn't see it until now. Why? Why are you so loyal after so short a time?"
Merlin frowned. "Does she not know?" he asked of Aglain.
"What?" Morgana demanded, suddenly realising that she wasn't in possession of all the facts here. "What haven't you told me?"
"My lady," Aglain soothed. "Things need to be revealed slowly, or else it could all go wrong as it did before."
The truth hit Merlin like a brick to the head. "That's why you wanted the crystal! It's from the Crystal Cave! You wanted to see the future!"
Aglain grinned happily. "Indeed, Emrys. None of us have been able to enter the Cave, but this is the crystal of Neahtid and we hope that it will guide us."
"Do you know me, Emrys?"
The young voice rang in his head and he turned to look at the boy with the scary eyes. "Do I?" he asked and the boy smiled because he had done the telepathic thing.
"My name is Mordred,"
If all the other revelations had been like bricks to the head or thumps to his heart, this felt like someone had just sliced his heart in two with an ice knife. "No…" he gasped. "No…. you can't be here too…."
Morgana stepped forward to help her friend, but Merlin just stepped back and felt for the door. He had to get away from here… get away from that boy… Even Aglain looked worried and the other two druids were moving, as though aiming to intervene.
"Stay away from Arthur! Stay away from him!" Merlin commanded, although his fear made it sound less forceful "Please… stay away from him."
Merlin reached the door and just ran off the boat into Arthur's arms.
"What the hell, Merlin? Your phone stopped and… what's wrong? Is Morgana…?"
"Get away from here, Arthur! Get away…!" Merlin pleaded.
"What? What are you…? Morgana?"
Morgana had just stepped off the boat, looking elegant and poised as she always did and Arthur pushed Merlin aside and went to her side.
"Morgana! Are you alright? Where have you been?"
"I came here because I wanted to, Arthur. I'm absolutely fine and these people have been able to help me with my dreams."
"Then why the hell didn't you leave a note? Or tell us where you were? Father's been ripping the college to shreds and the police are on the case…" he grabbed her by both arms.
"I didn't want anyone to know where I was," she explained haughtily, "and it's no one's business where I go."
"What about the crystal?" Arthur demanded.
"I have no idea what you are talking about," Morgana lied calmly. "Merlin?"
Merlin was pacing around, wringing his hands agitatedly, trying to encourage Arthur to just get away from this place, to go far away and avoid the boy who would one day kill him. "Please… please can we go? Please, Sire?"
Arthur looked like he wanted to storm the barge tear it apart, but Morgana linked her arm through his and dragged him away.
"Arthur, let's go home and tell Uther where I am so he can stop badgering the police. Look, I've sent him a text. I couldn't do it before because the people here have jammed the phone signal."
Her phone rang with a Celtic theme almost immediately and she smiled with dimples and answered.
"Yes, Father. I'm fine. I've been with some friends who don't have a phone signal. I didn't realise that I had to tell everyone where I was all the time."
Merlin followed and listened to the Morgana side of the conversation, marvelling at how she was able to talk him around. She seemed to be the only person in the world who wasn't scared of the man.
"Emrys?" the voice of the boy sounded in his head.
"Get out of my head! Don't you dare come near him! You won't take him away from me this time, I swear it!"
"I will use the crystal and I will learn how to avoid that fate. I wish your King no harm."
Merlin shook his head and covered his ears as though that might help, and maybe it did, as the voice went quiet, but he couldn't help but be scared. His heart felt so cold that his whole body shivered in painful shudders and he just wanted to go home and be warm again.
"Merlin!" Arthur called irritated. "Merlin!"
"Yes, my lord," Merlin responded and he felt the shivers subside a little. Arthur was safe. He was here and away from Mordred.
"Come on!" Arthur commanded and Merlin sighed. It felt better to know that he was there, alive and irritated, because all he could see behind his eyelids was his dead body, encased in armour, lying on top of his own devastated body, his whole soul crying to the heavens. "Look, if you don't get a move on then I'm dragging you by your hair!" Arthur threatened and he grabbed hold of Merlin's arm.
Merlin relaxed. It was still bloody freezing, but Arthur was alive, warm and furious.
"Yes Sire," he mumbled and followed.
The family meal that night was loud and terrible and Gwen, George and Merlin all hid in the kitchen, all agreeing that being in the same room as three angry Pendragons was truly not a good idea. All three listened and shared glances, but not even George dared to go in and actually attempt to serve in any way. When the desserts arrived, George took on the removing of the first course, Gwen took the desserts and Merlin refilled the glasses and even managed not to spill anything, then they all ran away back to the kitchen where Leon and Audrey were chuckling at them.
"Are you three OK?" Leon asked. "You look…"
"I think the word you are looking for is 'terrified'," Merlin told him. "Seriously, I'm not going back in there."
"I think my lady's winning," Gwen decided.
"You don't think that the Master is correct?" George asked. "Should Lady Morgana be allowed to wander off?"
"She's twenty-two years old!" Gwen argued. "She has her finals this summer and she could go and live somewhere else if she wanted. She could go back to Trinity College if her father doesn't watch out."
"But the Master worries about her," George said sympathetically and Merlin thought that anyone who could be sympathetic towards Uther should be rewarded in gold.
"I think Lord Arthur would like to wrap her cotton wool too, but she won't let him," Merlin nodded.
Leon and Audrey just collapsed in giggles, especially when all three of them looked bewildered.
"I don't know what it is about the Pendragons," Leon sniggered. "but you three act like they are, I don't know.. royalty or something."
"You clearly haven't been in the middle of a Pendragon family riot," Merlin explained. "Seriously, all three of us… if I had spilled the wine, I think they might have strung me up outside on a homemade gibbet. If you want to go up there and clear the table, I'm not stopping you."
"I'm paid to keep the violence out of the house, not to stop any inside the house," Leon decided. "you can keep your tasks, and I'll go back to my post."
"Coward!" Gwen shouted at his retreating back.
They still waited until the room was Pendragon-free before clearing the table and played a knock-out game of Rock/Paper/Scissors for who was going to take the coffee to them in the living room. George lost.
Merlin took an espresso up to Arthur's room when he thought it was safe. Arthur was not-watching the TV and he switched it off when Merlin arrived and strode over to Merlin, face furious and finger in his servant's face.
"OK, so what was all that about? Why is Morgana being like that? What was she doing in that boat? And why the fuck didn't you tell me what was going on?"
Merlin was a bit shocked as he'd never heard Arthur swear before.
"I… um…"
"No secrets, Merlin. Tell me everything."
Merlin handed him the coffee and tried to settle his thoughts. His loyalty was with Arthur, no question, but was it in Arthur's best interest to know? He wished that he could have spoken to Kilgharrah before facing him, but the truth and the explanation were too much, too complicated…
"I don't know very much, sir."
"Tell me what you do know."
It hadn't escaped his notice that Arthur hadn't invited him to sit down. He was in full King-mode.
Merlin swallowed. "I don't think that your father should know this… but… the crystal…" he swallowed again. "Lady Morgana took the crystal and gave it to the Druids."
"What?" Arthur stood up and Merlin stepped back.
"Th… they need it," Merlin tried.
"They stole it! That man, he made her steal it for them!" Arthur raged. "She lied to Father! She blatantly lied to him!"
And that, there, was why Merlin couldn't tell him everything. Arthur was still loyal to his father and letting Uther know… it wouldn't end well for the Druids.
"What the hell are 'the Druids'?"
"That's what they call themselves, sir. They… um… chant and stuff and practise… um… magic."
"Magic!" Arthur mocked. "Really?"
"They thought that the crystal was magic," Merlin explained, latching onto the word. "They think that they can see the future with it and Lady Morgana went to them to ask for more information about… you know, her dreams."
"Are they going to come back and steal more?" Arthur asked dangerously, and Merlin bumped into the wall he had been backing towards.
"No! The crystal was all they wanted. They might even give it back after they've done whatever they wanted to do with it."
"Why didn't they just ask to borrow it?" Arthur demanded, clearly exasperated.
"You've met Uther?" Merlin replied sarcastically and Arthur nodded and started pacing.
"That's fair. He would never just hand it over, especially not to some weirdos who call themselves Druids. Do they invade Stonehenge and dance naked under a full moon?"
"I have no idea, sir," Merlin replied, relaxing a little.
"So what did they say? You were in there a while."
"I… um… asked after your sister and they told me that she was safe, then she came out of the back room and told me that she didn't need to be rescued. They explained about the frequency jamming… it interferes with their magic and… they told me their names."
"Names? You got names?" Arthur latched onto that. "If I can give Father names, then he'll drop the matter and just demand the crystal back. He might even drop the lawsuit."
"I don't know if they'll help, sir," Merlin muttered. "Their leader was called Aglain and the boy…" he swallowed again. "The boy was called Mordred."
Arthur stared at him. "Is this a wind-up? Is it some sick joke? Cos it's not funny! Is this you? Are you part of it?"
"What?" Merlin was pushed back into the wall again. "No! Not… no!"
"Merlin? Mordred? Just because my name's Arthur? And Lancelot, is he on this too?"
"No! Arthur, I swear it! There's no conspiracy. It's… I don't know…Please?"
"I was beginning to like you, but now I…"
"Don't fire me!" Merlin pleaded. "Please… I haven't done anything!"
"Then what the hell is going on? EXPLAIN!"
"I can't…" Merlin actually whimpered. "I'm sorry, sir, I really can't…"
"Then why shouldn't I fire you? It would be the sensible thing to do." Arthur was still pressing him up against the wall and Merlin was pretty sure that Arthur would start hitting him any time now.
"Because I'm loyal to you," Merlin stated as strongly as he could, bravely staring directly into Arthur's eyes. "I will do anything for you."
"Why? Why me? Why would you even say that?" Arthur stepped back and Merlin dropped his shoulders, shakily pulling his clothes back into place.
"Because… because I believe that you will be a great man. I think that you will change the world and make it better, fairer. I can't do anything myself, I'm not that sort of person, but I can support you and believe in you."
Now Arthur just looked gobsmacked. "You… you think I can change the world?"
"Yes," Merlin nodded, embarrassed.
Arthur went back to his sofa and sat down, running his hand through his hair. Merlin was a bit annoyed that Arthur's hair always looked amazing, whatever he did to it, while Merlin's generally just looked like a bird's nest.
"I don't understand," Arthur sighed, head in hands. " Why would you say something like that? You barely even know me."
"What you did for Gwaine and for that homeless guy? You work on your charities every day and you hate it when they let you down. I've heard you being very rude and abrupt with people who won't see that your way will make people's lives better. Even this morning you were worried about Morgana, but you still spoke to that guy about the new shelter in Huntingdon. You are going to change everything for the better and I'll be there with you."
"What will you do, Merlin?"
"Anything," Merlin vowed. "Even if all you need from me is clean socks," he added, daring to grin.
"You're an idiot," Arthur said fondly, pulling Merlin down onto the sofa. "My idiot?"
"Your idiot," Merlin agreed.
"What about the others? I mean Lancelot, Mordred?"
"Your sister is Morgana, your father is Uther, even Gwen is Guinevere. I… maybe it's because of Camelot College? I chose it because of my name and because Gaius was here. But I didn't really know him. I just liked the name."
"We're Pendragons," Arthur said slowly. "We always have Arthurian names. My grandfather and my Great-Grandfather were both called Arthur, although Grandpa liked to be called Art apparently. There is a sort of chalice thing that was stolen from our family a couple of hundred years ago that my father says is the holy Grail, but that's stupid! We have all kinds of things that are supposed to be Arthurian, and at the Castle there's a whole library full of every book that was ever written about the legends."
"I came here to study ASNaC partly because of my name," Merlin admitted. "Dr Kilgharrah is one of the world's top specialists in Arthurian Legend."
"But… Merlin and Arthur? Really? I mean you're not a sorcerer."
Merlin smiled, but didn't say anything.
"You… you looked really freaked out when you came off that barge," Arthur remembered and placed a hand on Merlin's arm.
"I was…" the cold fear washed over Merlin again. "That boy with the freaky eyes told me he was Mordred. In the legends, Mordred k…kills King Arthur," Merlin explained. "I… I just… all I could see was… You… dead…"
"I've never… no one has ever treated me as though I am anything special," Arthur said softly. "My father thinks I'm a huge disappointment, I only got a 2:2 for my degree, I play sports well and I'm the Rugby Captain, but I was never a Blue, I try to run my department at Pendragon FS, but they all just say 'yes' and then try to manipulate me into doing what they want me to do. I really do care about the charity division and I had to plead with my father to add that to my department… but they all know that I only have my job because I'm Uther's son. I was born into a patrician family and I have a private income that could probably run a small country, but… none of it is through my own merit. I've always wanted to try to… to prove myself somehow."
"I'm on your side, Arthur. I always will be. I've seen enough to know that you are worthy and… I don't think anything could change that."
"You're a strange fish, Merlin. I've never met anyone like you."
Merlin snorted. "I'm a pathetic weirdo. I've always been told that. Even my mum thinks I'm odd."
"I don't understand your loyalty, but… I can live with it. I'll try not to let you down."
"I think that's my line," Merlin laughed nervously. "I'm clumsy and I've been told I may have a slight touch of Asperger's, although I was never diagnosed or tested, and it's not enough to be anti-social… well, maybe a bit. I don't do any of the obsessive stuff, but I do tend to latch onto something or someone that makes me feel… not safe, but… needed… worthwhile… I'm afraid that's you…" he shrugged.
Arthur pulled his head towards him and ruffled his hair again affectionately. Merlin lapped it up and smiled.
"Bedtime I think. I don't know about you, but I'm worn out. I saw you and George and Gwen high-tailing it out of the dining room this evening and I was jealous. I'd have loved to be able to just leave."
"There have to be some advantages to my lowly position," Merlin chuckled.
"Well, I'm going to bed." Arthur wandered off into the bathroom and Merlin dug out the pyjamas and warmed them on the radiator, then he pulled back the bedclothes and fluffed the pillows. He could hear Arthur brushing his teeth, so he tidied everything, including the espresso cup, and made sure that everything was where it should be. He felt reluctant to leave the room for some reason, so he decided to light the fire and get a blaze going. It stirred something inside to do something primitive like that, as though it were remembered from some distant past and he wondered if that was the kind of thing that Merlin from the Back Then used to do. He probably did it with magic though.
"You lit a fire?" Arthur asked, startling Merlin who had been slightly hypnotised by the flames.
"It's cold," Merlin shrugged and got up to fetch the pyjamas. "I thought it might relax you." He handed the clothes over. "I'll… um… do you want me to do anything else?" he asked, half hoping that there would be something.
"No, thank you Merlin. Sleep well," Arthur smiled.
Merlin nodded and picked up the cup, leaving quietly.
The next evening, Arthur told Merlin that the police had gone to raid the boat, but it had disappeared. They had searched all the way up the Ouse and the Nene, but there was no sign of it at all. There were no registered people or boat owners with the name Aglain or Druid or even Mordred and the name of the boat was no help either.
Merlin stayed in Arthur's room to do his homework and reading because it was warm and Gaius had gone to visit someone called Alice. He kept the fire going and sat on the footstool/cushion thing with his laptop on his knees and his reference books scattered all around him. He knew that Arthur kept glancing at him, watching him, but he didn't say anything and carried on working until late. Every so often Merlin would pop down to the kitchen for coffee, bringing tea back for himself, and when he had served Arthur his dinner, he went down to the kitchen to join the others. There was going to be a Formal Hall on the Thursday night and he and Gwen were going to be serving the top table.
It felt good to have explained himself to Arthur, and Arthur seemed to be fine with him being more present in his room, especially when Gaius was away. When Gaius was away for a week to consult with a doctor in Edinburgh, Merlin moved into the little room next to Arthur's again and Arthur seemed to be satisfied to know where Merlin was.
Morgana was angry for a week and she flounced off to stay with friends, but when she got back, she actually called for Merlin. When Merlin asked Gwen what it was about, Gwen just shrugged and accompanied him to Morgana's room.
Merlin knocked and when he was allowed to enter, Gwen pushed him forwards and then left.
Morgana was sitting on a velvet-covered French style armchair, finishing off a cup of tea and she smiled at Merlin, but Merlin found it a slightly odd smile. Kilgharrah had told him that Morgana had started off being a nice person, but that there had been 'ice in her heart', and, in the end, she was just as responsible for Arthur's death as Mordred.
He bowed slightly and said, "you wanted to see me, my lady?"
"My lady? I thought we were friends!" Morgana cried.
"I… um… I didn't mean to hurt you… I thought…"
"You thought I needed rescuing?"
"Yes!" Merlin agreed, relieved. "Lord Uther was really angry and the Police were interrogating me and…"
"Merlin, sit down… and don't worry! I'm not cross."
"Y… you're not?" Merlin asked hopefully. "I feel like I betrayed you."
"Sit," Morgana commanded, so Merlin sat on her sofa and waited. "I just wanted to know what you thought of my friends."
"The Druids?" Morgana nodded. "They seemed friendly. They wanted to help."
"Have you never wondered why we are all here? Why Gwen is my maid and you serve Arthur? Why I have those dreams?"
"Yes, my lady."
"My lady again! You can call me Morgana."
"Thank you," Merlin acknowledged, trying not to bounce his knees agitatedly. "Did you know that I have also met Lancelot?"
"Lancelot? Truly?" Morgana looked surprised. "Who is he?"
"He came to a Formal Hall and I sat next to him. He's met Lord Arthur."
"I took the crystal, Merlin," Morgana suddenly told him.
"I know," he nodded. "The Druids think that they can see the future with it."
"Aglain and Alvarr think that my dreams are true seeing dreams, dreams of prophecy."
"I think they're correct," Merlin admitted.
Morgana suddenly stood and Merlin stood with her because it was becoming an ingrained reaction. She dropped her air of calm and started seeming agitated.
"I… they told me that I might…. This is going to sound stupid, but…"
"Magic? My lady?" Merlin asked, trying to help her.
"Can magic exist?" she asked in a very small voice.
Merlin considered that. He really wanted to talk to her about it, but Kilgharrah was convinced that she would turn evil again. Merlin hadn't been able to get much out of him about what had happened, but he was pretty sure it was his counterpart's fault in some way.
"I think it does…" he said eventually.
"You don't think I'm mad? You don't… Merlin, in the tales… Morgana is evil."
"You don't have to be evil. You can choose not to do evil things and I've seen you be compassionate. You were worried enough about my master that you came to tell me… you told me about your dream."
"Morgana married King Lot and had four children who were Knights of the Round Table. But she was an evil queen."
"Those are tales, my lady. Dr Kilgharrah, my supervisor, has a theory that they were written to obfuscate and confuse, to make people think that they were just myths and fiction."
"Do you think that Arthur really existed? And Morgana, and Merlin?"
"I… yes, my lady, I think they did, but not the way that most people think," Merlin explained, trying to find a way to not quite lie. "Shall I ask Dr Kilgharrah to talk to you? Maybe he can help?"
"I'll think about it. Merlin, why were you so frightened by the Druids?"
Merlin dropped his head and his fingers twisted around each other.
"The boy… he…um…"
"The mute boy?"
Merlin shivered and wondered how he could possibly tell this tale. "They told me his name and…"
"His name? They wouldn't tell me his name!" Morgana cried.
"His name is Mordred… if it is all true and… he's destined to kill Arthur and I can't let that happen!"
"He's just a child," Morgana argued.
"But he will grow up and…"
"Merlin, stop!" she caught his arms and pressed inwards, stopping him. "You're worrying about something that may never happen. We'll make sure that it doesn't."
He nodded, "Yes… yes, you're right. My lady? May I come and… talk to you about it sometimes?"
"Of course, yes."
"Thank you… I am studying the Arthurian Legends and my dissertation is going to be about trying to find some truth in them. I'll tell you anything I find out."
"Thank you, Merlin."
"Do you need anything else, My lady?" he asked formally and she smiled.
"No thank you, Merlin. Thank you for not laughing at me."
"I would never…!" She grinned at him and he gave her a small nodding bow and left the room.
He really needed to talk to Kilgharrah.
"No, absolutely not, no!"
"But she needs to know, sir!" Merlin argued. "If she knows about magic and doesn't have to hide it, then she will understand and…"
"No, I refuse to help the Witch. She nearly destroyed the world several times!"
"But it's different this time! She is scared that she might turn!"
"Wait!" Kilgharrah commanded. "Do not tell her about your magic. She did not know your identity until the very end."
"But if she knows that we are the same…"
"Merlin, you were the one to send her to the Druids in the old days, and she was the one who made you help the Druid Boy. If you ever come across…"
"I've met Mordred," Merlin dropped the bombshell.
Seriously, the dragon roared as he cried out "WHAT?"
"We both met him with the Druids. He told me that he was afraid and that he did not want to kill my lord."
"He is Mordred! You must kill him!" the dragon bit out angrily.
"I can't just kill him!" Merlin answered shocked. "You can't go around killing people!"
"But he is the one who will murder your King. He has his destiny to fulfil as much as you do!"
There was a definite roar in his voice, but whereas Merlin would normally shy away from such anger, with Kilgharrah he just felt anger in return. He stood and declared, "I don't have to 'fulfil my destiny', I could choose not to and walk away, and so could he… So could Morgana. They both know already and both want to avoid it. They both know that I will protect Arthur in any way that I can."
Kilgharrah sat down and swivelled his chair in thought. "You have accepted your destiny. You have declared your loyalty to your King and Master. That will certainly make your life feel better."
Merlin sat down and thought about that. "Yes… I told him that he is my safe place."
"Safe place?"
"One of my teachers once thought that I might have Asperger's Syndrome, because I always looked for a place where I could be safe, and I.. I am pretty clumsy… it didn't go any further, but it is true. I always have to have somewhere where I feel safe and… Arthur makes me feel safe."
"You don't have anything like that," Kilgharrah denied it out of hand. "You are just intensely loyal because he is your lord and your other half."
"Then I need to tell him too. It's not like the Back Then when Magic was outlawed. This time it just is and I can use it to save him."
"We have more work to do. There are prophesies about…"
"I don't care!" Merlin interrupted passionately, "I will always serve Arthur and I will always protect him and the only way I have to do that is through magic as I have no other skills."
Kilgharrah laughed, a dry kind of chuckle. "You have many more resources than that. Do not tell anyone else until you have regained your powers. At the moment you have even less than the first time I met you. You need to understand what you are studying and what the consequences are."
Merlin nodded. "Can you teach me?"
"You are not strong enough yet for my magic. The magic of the Dragon lords lives in you, but you will need to reignite it. I think that you will soon need to visit the Crystal Cave."
