Authors' Note: This story is set after the argument between Eddie and Buck in the grocery store and changes a little bit from there. At the start of this, Buck hasn't gotten his job back. And I don't want this to be seen as character bashing on either side. I'm just letting the characters work out their issues, however they are feeling them at the time.


Eddie rolled his shoulders as he made the trek back to his truck. The fight tonight had been just what he needed to work out some of the stress he'd been carrying. It didn't get rid of all of it, of course, but maybe one day he'd chip enough of it away so he could breathe again. He felt like he'd been drowning for months, maybe even years. And the one person who he thought he could talk to about it was unavailable.

Just the thought of Buck made all these emotions bubble up. And Eddie was not the biggest fan of emotions. He saved all his good ones for Christopher and shoved the bad ones away. He didn't have space for anything else in his life. His life wasn't all sadness and torment, but letting in the good ran the risk of letting in the bad. And that had been made abundantly clear during that meeting with the lawyer.

Eddie had kept his face carefully blank during that meeting, but he had to admit that having Shannon's death thrown in his face had stung. And Buck's quick glances up at him pissed him off. Was he looking for reassurance that he wasn't mad and they were okay? Because he was and they definitely weren't.

Their altercation at the grocery store had been a bit embarrassing, but Eddie had to admit that he didn't regret it. It felt nice to finally have a chance to get some of that out there, since he hadn't had the opportunity to before. It was kind of hard to talk to someone who wasn't allowed to talk to him.

And Buck acting like the victim was so typical. As if he was the only one suffering through all this. As if Eddie was most upset about the lawsuit against the department. It was about so much more than that.

"Hey! You cost me a lot of money tonight," a voice growled from behind him. Eddie tensed, turning to face whoever was talking. There was a guy standing a few yards away, glaring at him with his arms crossed. Eddie knew his type. Used all his time in the gym working his arms and chest, just so he could look tough in a sleeveless tee.

"Yeah? And how's that?" Eddie asked, trying to get a read on the situation. He could take this guy if he needed to, but he really wasn't trying to get into a fight in the open like this. Lena would probably leave him in jail out of annoyance.

"I bet my money on the other guy," the man hissed.

"Sounds like your problem, not mine," Eddie shrugged.

"I'm making it your problem. Give me what I lost and you can be on your way," the man spat, taking a step closer. Eddie gripped the handle of his bag tighter, preparing to strike if necessary. His truck was still a little ways away, but he wasn't even considering making a run for it. Backing down from a fight wasn't his style.

"Not gonna happen, so why don't you walk away before someone gets hurt?" Eddie suggested. The man had obviously watched the fight, so he knew that Eddie wasn't one to be pushed around. Eddie would just incapacitate him and then be on his way. At least, that's what would've happened if the man hadn't brought friends.

Eddie didn't even realize they weren't alone until he was being tackled to the ground. He went with the momentum of the hit, rolling over his shoulder and popping back up to his feet. Eddie swung at the man closest to him, sending him down to the ground without much effort. The first man wrapped him up in a bear hug from behind, but Eddie slammed his head back into the guy's face. The sound of his nose breaking was satisfying and fueled him further.

Two of the men were circling him, but Eddie did his best to keep them all in his line of vision. They didn't seem like they did this sort of thing often, but it didn't mean they wouldn't get lucky. The numbers weren't in his favor.

"There is still a chance to walk away. You don't want to do this," Eddie warned, sizing them up to pick out who looked like the biggest threat. The man he'd punched had gotten up pretty quickly, which showed he knew how to take a hit. That was probably the one he had to look out for. Although, a weapon could throw all the strategizing in the world out the window.

Just as one of the men charged at him, a blinding pain struck Eddie in the back of his skull. He went down hard, seeing stars. Eddie groaned, hearing the clatter of what sounded like a metal pipe being thrown before the kicking started. He curled up into as tight of a ball as he could, throwing an arm over his already battered head. The men were hurling insults at him as they assaulted him, but Eddie didn't care about what they were saying. All he was trying to do was stay conscious.

One of the men started digging through his bag, while another was pawing around in Eddie's pockets. They took all the money out of his wallet, which wasn't much, before tossing it back on the ground. It landed open, leaving Christopher's picture staring back at him. Eddie immediately felt guilty for taking a risk like this, when he already did in his job. Christopher deserved better.

"I hope you learned your lesson," the first man spat, cradling his broken nose. He pulled Eddie up by the front of his collar, before rearing his fist back. Eddie barely had a chance to turn his face before he was punched, taking the impact on his cheek instead of straight to the nose. It still hurt, but better than not being able to breathe properly for weeks. He was roughly pushed back onto his back and got another kick to the stomach before the men finally stalked away.

Eddie took a few moments to try to take stock of his current situation. Pretty much everything hurt, but he didn't think anything was broken. Maybe a few ribs, but probably not bad enough to puncture a lung. The most worrying thing at the moment was his head, which was pounding mercilessly. His vision was swimming and he knew he wasn't going to be able to drive like this. He needed help.

By some miracle, the men hadn't wanted anything other than cash. They could've taken his cards, his bag, even his truck, but they didn't. They left his cell phone as well. Eddie pulled it out of his pocket, hissing in pain as the movement pulled on his sore muscles. But once he finally had the phone in his hand, he wasn't sure who to call.

Calling 911 was out of the question. That was too much and he didn't need all that. Lena made it clear that she didn't appreciate these types of calls, so she was crossed off as an option as well. She would probably make an exception for this, but he really didn't want her to know how far he'd taken the hobby she showed him. And that was why he couldn't call Bobby or anyone else from the station either. There was only one person Eddie knew he could call, no matter what.

Eddie pressed the number on his speed dial and listened as the line rang. Buck always had his phone on him. And no matter what was going on between them, Buck would always come through for him. But after two rings, the call went to voicemail. Eddie huffed out a shocked breath. Buck rejected his call.

Eddie hit the end button, feeling a new pain well up in his chest. The rational part of his brain told him that Buck wouldn't have done that if he knew the predicament Eddie was in, but that part of his brain wasn't in control right now. All he saw was Buck pushing him away in his time of need, just like he had before.

Eddie's blinks became more sluggish as the disappointment and hopelessness of it all settled into his bones. He knew he needed to fight, but he was so tired. His whole life had been a struggle and there always seemed to be something waiting to smack him back down. And as his eyes closed for the last time, he wished he wasn't doing it all alone.


Buck knew he'd made a mistake less than a second after he rejected Eddie's call. It had been reflexive, after seeing his name pop up on the screen. All the hurt that had built up reared its head again and he just did it. He really didn't want to get yelled at again.

Eddie's words in the grocery store had cut him deep. Being told that he was exhausting was bringing up all of his childhood memories of feeling like a burden. He'd never felt like anyone truly wanted him around and hearing that from Eddie felt like a confirmation of that fear.

His friendship with Eddie was different. At least, he thought it was. They were close and Buck could honestly call Eddie his best friend. And not just in that way some people threw the term around. Buck thought Eddie was the person he would be able to turn to, no matter what. He thought Eddie would understand what he was doing, even if they couldn't really talk about it yet. But maybe he was wrong.

Although, Eddie was calling him, so that had to mean something, right? Even if it was to chew him out again, that was more communication than they'd had in a while. Eddie was the kind of guy who didn't let things out, so the fact that he'd felt comfortable enough to do it with Buck meant something, even if it had been less than pleasant. Maybe Buck owed it to them both to give him a chance.

Buck grabbed his phone and called Eddie's number before he lost his nerve. It had only been about a minute since Eddie called, so there was no reason he wouldn't still have his phone nearby. But he didn't answer. And Eddie made sure to let it ring all the way to voicemail. Buck ended the call before he could record a message, knowing what he needed to say couldn't be said through a machine. They needed to talk in person. He grabbed his jacket and keys, determined to have this talk right now.

The drive to Eddie's house didn't feel like it usually did. Buck would typically have an excited energy thrumming through him in anticipation of seeing Eddie and Christopher. Guilt washed over him again at the thought of Christopher. It hadn't been that long since they'd seen each other, but it was longer than usual. And the fact that this was happening so soon after the tsunami made Buck feel like garbage. He didn't want Christopher to see him as another person who'd left him, especially after they'd been through so much together. He and Eddie needed to figure this out, and not just for them.

Buck pulled up outside the Diaz house, but it didn't look like anyone was home. All the lights were off and Eddie's truck wasn't in the driveway. Buck had a key and had let himself in countless times, but that didn't seem appropriate anymore. He would just wait in his jeep until Eddie came back, then they could talk.

But minutes turned to hours and Eddie still didn't show up. Buck thought about calling or texting again, but decided against it. If Eddie wasn't home, he must've been out with someone. It was too late to have Chris out, so he must've been spending the night with his abuela. And the thought of Eddie being out with someone who wasn't him was making him feel some kind of way. He had no right to really, but Buck wanted to be the person Eddie spent the night with. Even if it was just sitting on the couch and watching television. The time he spent with Eddie was the best time of his day.

Was he being pathetic right now? Was Eddie going to get home and be annoyed at the sight of Buck waiting for him? Was this him being exhausting? Hopefully he'd find out soon, since he wasn't going anywhere.

Buck's heart leapt when his phone rang in his pocket and he pulled it out as quickly as possible, but his face fell when the number on the display was one he didn't recognize. He blew out a breath, making sure to regulate his voice before he answered. The person on the other end of the line didn't deserve his anger.

"Hello?" Buck answered, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel.

"Is this Evan Buckley?" a woman's voice asked.

"Yeah, who's this?" Buck replied. If someone was trying to sell him something, he was going to scream.

"I'm calling from First Presbyterian Hospital. You're listed as the emergency contact for an Edmundo Diaz."

"Eddie?" Buck choked out, feeling all the blood leave his face. Eddie was in the hospital? Eddie was in the hospital and not in a position to call people himself? "Is- is he-"

"He was brought into the emergency room via ambulance a few hours ago. He's not currently awake, but he's stable. We've set him up in a room for observation overnight," the woman, probably a nurse, explained.

"I'm- I'm coming," Buck rushed out, sticking his keys into the ignition and gunning it down the road. The nurse said something about the front desk telling him where to go, but he barely heard any of it as he tossed his phone into the passenger's seat.

Eddie was hurt and alone. Eddie tried calling him, but Buck hadn't answered. Would it have changed whatever happened? Buck didn't think he'd ever forgive himself if he could've prevented this. If he wasn't convinced before that they needed to fix things, he sure was now. Before it was too late.