Ndogo
I stared down at the ball of golden fluff, my eyes wide. It was mostly still, but a steady rise and fall indicated life.
I turned back toward my aunt Zarina who crouched protectively over her cub. "But Auntie, she's so small. Will she really be a mighty huntress some day?"
Zarina chuckled, a low throaty mumbling sound. "Ah Ndogo, all lions are this size when born. I daresay you were even smaller. But I don't think he will be much of a huntress. This is your brother, Mufasa."
I looked down in awe. A brother. I had many aunts, many sisters of my father, but a father's brother? Who'd heard of such a thing.
"Will you protect him, Ndogo? You are the eldest after all."
I straightened, my eyes shining with pride. "I will, Auntie. I promise."
A few days before my second birthday I noticed my mane starting to grow for the first time. I was ecstatic and dashed around Pride Rock telling all who would listen. My mother chided me for running, warned me to slow down or I would trip.
I did.
Just as I finished showing Auntie Zarina and Father, I hit a small ridge of stone in the floor. I fell heavily and paused to catch a breath. Behind me, I heard voices resume.
"Jaleel, my love, the Ndogo is growing up, but you see how small he still is for his age. I wonder if he'll be able to hold the lionesses together. And heaven forbid a challenger comes from outside. He's still so young."
I frowned and backed against the wall, still and quiet as I listened for my father.
"Zarina darling, there are years yet before anyone must take my place. I am still young myself."
"But what of his mother? Kimya grows more sickly by the day. The younger huntresses whisper about how she can no longer hunt. They fear her son may have inherited her frailty." My father mumbled something I could not make out before Auntie's voice interrupted, "Jaleel, my king, he just now came running to show you his wisp of a mane. My Mufasa is several moons younger but already has more of a mane growing in. I know you care for Ndogo, he is your son and firstborn, but can he really lead the Pride when you are gone?"
"Enough, Zarina. I am weary of this topic. We can speak more later."
I crept from the room, an aching, gnawing feeling in my chest.
When the moon had waxed and waned twice, my brother and I were taken hunting with the lionesses. Our father wanted us to know and honor the bravery and skill of our huntresses.
I was excited to go out, but it was tempered by the absence of my mother. She'd grown sick over the past few weeks and could no longer go hunting at all. Instead of walking with my mother, I had to walk with Auntie Zarina and Mufasa. My brother was almost as big as me now, and his coat was bright and long. I had to hold myself very tall to feel like the older brother now.
I ignored the whispers as we walked. Whispers about my size, my short and dark mane, my mother. I listened instead to Mufasa as he chattered away. "I can't believe we get to see the lionesses' hunt. This is my very first time this far from Pride Rock. What about you? Have you been out before?" He paused while I shook my head. "Wow so it's both our first times! I'm so excited. Do you think we'll see a hyena?"
"Hush Mufasa," Auntie whispered, her eyes fixed on a herd of gazelle grazing beneath us on the Savannah. "We're here. You two stay up here and keep low. Don't move until we come for you, understand?"
We whispered our agreement and crouched low in the long grasses. Eyes wide, I watched Zarina lead the others to surround the herd. They moved like shadows through the grass, unseen by the peaceful gazelle. By the time they saw the lionesses, it was too late. The huntresses leapt forward, falling upon the old and the sickly. They easily brought down three as the rest of the herd fled.
Mufasa jumped up and laughed. "Did you see that, brother? They took those gazelles down like it was nothing! We'll eat so well tonight." He laughed again.
"Shhh, get down," I whispered urgently. "Auntie told us to stay hidden, remember?"
He frolicked away from me, a grin on his face. "Mom's so uptight. We've got all the best huntresses in the pride right there. We'll be fine. Come on, let's play."
I shook my head, making myself even smaller. There was a weird scent on the air that made me nervous. Mufasa laughed at me and began running off, away from Auntie and the others. I didn't want to follow, but I remembered my promise to his mother so long ago. Reluctantly I followed him, staying low to the ground.
Mufasa jumped and ran, making his way toward a pile of rocks. He climbed to the top and stared out over the savannah. "Brother, come up here. It's beautiful. You know, everything the light touches will be ours someday. We'll be kings."
I frowned. "Come down now, Mufasa. We need to get back to the others."
"Well now, what do we have here?"
I flattened myself against the ground, eyes wide as I watched a single lion come around the rock pile. His eyes were glittering as they moved from my brother to the area where I hid. Unable to catch a glimpse of me, he focused on Mufasa instead, who'd slowly started climbing down the rocks toward me, his eyes narrowed on the newcomer.
"There must be a pride around here, huh? Lots of strong and beautiful lionesses to spawn such a brave young cub as yourself. I suppose you're the heir here, aren't you? Would be a shame if something happened to such a sweet prince. How old is your father anyway? I'm sure the lionesses would prefer some... younger blood, if you know what I mean."
Mufasa growled. "You stay away from my mom and dad."
The stranger laughed. "How brave. I suppose you'll protect them?" He stalked forward, backing Mufasa into a corner. I could feel my heart clenching in my chest as I crept closer. "But who'll protect you?"
I leapt, claws out, onto the stranger's back. He was bigger than me, by quite a bit, but surprise and momentum helped me wrest him to the ground. "Mufasa, get help!" I roared as I struggled to stay on top of the stranger. I heard Mufasa take off running.
We struggled for what seemed like forever, but must have been only moments. Finally, his superior strength allowed the stranger to push me off. I landed hard in the grass nearby. He swiped at my head but I rolled out of the way, a terrible sting lashing across my face as I went. I dashed to the side, but when I turned, I noticed the stranger was blurry. A warm wetness fell on my paw like summer rain. It was red.
Before I could think about what had happened, the stranger leapt toward me again. I was forced to roll to the side again, his claws catching on my wiry mane and pulling painfully.
We continued the dance—him lunging forward and me dodging backward—until my back legs collided painfully with the rocks. Somehow, I'd gotten turned around and was now backed into the same corner as Mufasa. I stared at the older lion in terror, realizing that I was trapped.
"So," the stranger breathed, drawing out the word ominously. "The heir and the runt. You should have let me kill him. If the lionesses had taken me down you would have become heir."
I tightened my jaw, my ears back against my skull. "I am the heir, traveler, and I protect my Pride. I will not allow you to hurt any one of them."
He laughed, a vicious cackle that chilled me. "You? The heir over that other brat? Someone's lying to you, kitten. You may be the eldest but you will never be king as long as the other cub lives."
"Ndogo!"
The lionesses appeared like winter lightning, a sudden flash of sound and color. The stranger spun around but was surrounded. The fight was over nearly before it had begun. With a roar of pain, the stranger shook off the two lionesses atop him and dashed away.
"Don't follow him!" Aunt Zarina growled as she watched him run. "We must get the princes home."
I looked around the circle, my heart still hammering from the adrenaline. Mufasa crouched behind his mother, watching me with wide eyes and his fur standing on end. "Are... are you ok?"
I nodded slowly, my mouth still too dry to speak. We followed the huntresses as they began to lead us back to Pride Rock.
Zarina fell into step beside us, watching both of us carefully. "What happened?"
"Mum, it was so scary. The strange lion came up behind us and said he'd kill us and take over the Pride! Except, I don't think he knew brother was there. That's how I got away—brother pounced when the stranger's back was turned."
Zarina nodded slowly. "And how came you to be so far from where I left you?" When neither of us spoke, she sighed. "I suppose we will discuss that later. Ndogo, we need to get your face looked at. That gash will certainly scar, but it doesn't look like the eye itself is injured."
I frowned, trying to understand what she was saying. I licked my paw and rubbed it near my eye. Nothing. Then I tried the other side and hissed in pain.
"Ndogo, really. I just said we'd take care of it. Leave it alone."
I remembered the sting across my face. The stranger's claws must have gotten me. At least I could still see well enough.
When we arrived back at Pride Rock, it was eerily quiet and my father was sitting at the entrance to the cave waiting for us.
"Ndogo, my family, I have grave news I must share with you all. Kimya is missing. She went out to patrol the borders just before your party left and she has not returned. It is not like her to be out so long."
Everything felt cold and quiet. I dimly heard Auntie's voice as though through a haze. "My king, you should know that a stranger was in our lands today. He accosted your sons. Ndogo fought bravely to give Mufasa time to bring word to the huntresses. It is possible Kimya also met him. If she did, at her age and health, it is unlikely she survived."
My legs felt heavy as I tried to walk forward. "Father... I... Is Mum really... gone?"
He turned toward me, his warm dark eyes unusually serious. "I'm afraid it is likely, my son."
Trembling, I tried to look around, anxiously waiting for someone to tell me this was a joke. Instead, I saw sympathy, pity, in the eyes of my family. "No."
Mufasa stepped toward me. "It's alright, brother. I'm sure the lionesses will go look for her. It hasn't been that long. I'm sure she's out there."
I met his eyes, so confident and reassuring. Maybe he was right.
Zarina sighed. "If she can't be seen from here, it's likely we won't find her. However, I wanted to increase patrols anyway, so I'll make sure everyone is watching for her."
The other lionesses nodded and began breaking off into groups, to patrol or bring in the hunt or go back to their children. In moments, I was left alone with Auntie, Father, and Mufasa.
"Child," my father's voice was slow and tender. "It's been hours. It is unlikely even the kings of old could save her now. You must make peace."
The rest of the day passed in a blur as those words reverberated in my skull. Peace. Peace with what? That I was now alone? Mufasa tried to talk to me, several times, but I avoided him. I didn't want to see anyone. Once my eye was tended, I didn't have to. I hid, watching as the huntresses returned, one group at a time, while my mother remained missing.
I didn't notice when the sun broke the distant horizon, nor when the stars dimmed at morn. Days passed as I hid and watched the lands around Pride Rock. The horizon grew hazy with my exhaustion and hunger, but it felt impossible to move. Had anyone even noticed I was gone?
I don't know how long I'd been there when my father found me. He picked me up gently, as if I weighed nothing at all, and brought me back to the Pride. No one spoke of my grief or my shame. They watched to make sure I ate and drank and then let me sleep. So, I did.
"Hey, Scar, wanna go play?" I whirled around, muscles taunt, as I looked at my brother.
"What did you call me?" I snarled.
Mufasa stared back at me unphased, still bouncing a little in his excitement. "I mean, you've got that cool scar now, and Ndogo isn't much of a nickname now that you're practically grown. I wonder if 'Scar' will stick?"
I growled at him. "I have a name, brother."
He shrugged, turning away from me. "Yeah, one that no one uses. If you don't want to come, you don't have to. I'll go see if Sarabi wants to play." He gamboled off toward where our sisters were avidly listening to the huntresses' latest exploits.
I watched him sit and begin talking to Sarabi, Sarafina, and the younger lionesses. I watched with growing envy as Sarabi's tail flicked invitingly against his. The lionesses tolerated me, but they always looked happy to see Mufasa.
"What is wrong, my Ndogo?"
"Father." I continued to watch my siblings, considering my words. "You said once long ago that, as the eldest, my role was to protect the Pride and my brother." I waited for his hum of agreement before continuing. "I thought for a long time that your word is all it took to become king, and that I would protect them as king. I was foolish, wasn't I?"
Father was quiet for a moment. "Not foolish, my son, though perhaps naïve. I have much authority and my words carry much weight. However, the lionesses are their own beings and will go where they choose. There is nothing I could say to hold them here if they chose to leave. The same is true for you."
"Did you ever intend for me to be king?"
"Ndogo, look at me." Grudgingly I did. His large dark eyes bored into my soul. "You were my first-born. I always intended for you to be king."
I held back a stream of questions and indignations. It wasn't fair. If the king wanted me to be his heir, who was another to tell us otherwise? Instead, I bit out, "So my role is to protect them as heir once again, but to my younger brother?"
He shrugged easily, turning his attention back to my siblings. "If you choose to accept that role. You have no obligation here if they choose to follow your brother. Indeed, one or two of your sisters might even follow you. I know Zira has always preferred your company."
I looked up at him in surprise, then turned back to the others, searching. Eventually I spotted the small dusty form of Zira, the runt of Auntie Zarina's second litter. She kept to the back of the group, watching without speaking. "Do you think she'd really leave?"
"I cannot say for sure, but it's possible."
I sighed. "I don't want to leave here, ever. It's my home."
"I hope you don't leave either." I looked up at my father in surprise. "Mufasa is brave and strong, but he's impulsive and proud, common failings for a cub that knows he is to be king one day. I fear for the safety of the Pride, especially in his first years as king. I ask that, whatever you decide, you help him adjust."
I fought against the tension threatening to overwhelm me and managed to choke out three words: "I will, Father." I nearly didn't notice him leaving as I continued to stare out at the others, the conversation still searing through my mind, sitting as still as the rocks surrounding me. I didn't sleep until late that night, mulling over my future that suddenly looked far different than the crown I'd always expected.
I stared down at my gasping father, shock numbing me to the fear and sorrow radiating off the others of the Pride. No one knew what was wrong. Of course, he was getting older—all but the youngest of his cubs were now fully grown—but he had never shown any sign of frailty. My tail was limp as I moved closer to nuzzle his cheek. "Father?"
"My... Ndogo." His rasping voice broke as a cough tore through him. "Take... c... care of th... them all."
"I promise, Father." I bowed my head, shivering as I heard his breath continuing to falter. I could hear the others gathering around, mourning even as they tried to give him comfort. I could find no comfort.
I watched in numb shock as my father took his final halting breaths. I sat dumb as Mufasa hesitantly took charge and issued directions to the Pride. I was deaf to the sobs and cheers rising from the Pride as my brother climbed Pride Rock and roared his protection over the kingdom. I was aware of nothing until a small alto voice directed itself toward me.
"Scar?" I cringed at the now ubiquitous nickname, especially spoken with that loving voice.
"Zira," I greeted, proud at fighting back the bite in my voice.
"What will you do now?"
I looked up at her and then the quiet bustle of activity around Pride Rock. I watched Mufasa directing the lionesses with Auntie, while Sarabi and Serafina took up places on either side of him. Finally, I sighed and stretched, my sinuous body tight after sitting still for so long. "I will stay and protect my Pride."
The admiration in her eyes almost made up for the pity I would see in everyone else's.
I looked down at the tiny cub, hairless and blind for all time. Zira had overextended herself and the cub had come early. Too early, as the last shallow breath had already left the tiny form. I clenched my eyes shut against the tears and forced myself to comfort my grieving mate. After everything we had been through in the year since Mufasa became king, how was this fair?
"Brother?" I looked up at Mufasa's uncertain expression. "Are you alright?"
"Let me tend to my mate in peace. Not all of us have a half dozen pretty lionesses competing to bear our cubs," I said sharply, my sorrow stealing any warmth from my voice.
His eyes hardened and he opened his mouth to retort, but he hesitated as his eyes flickered over Zira. He sighed. "Take care of her." Then, before turning, he met my eyes. "And learn some respect, Scar. I am the king here."
I flinched at his tone but couldn't look away as he moved off to greet his own heavily pregnant lioness.
"Scar, did you hear? Sarabi's given birth. Mufasa has a son, and the line is assured."
I fought back a growl at Serafina's chipper tone. Of the two littermates, I always had preferred Serafina to the new Queen Mother, but at the moment I was regretting letting either approach me. "The line would have been quite secure regardless."
"You're older than Mufasa. We needed a cub who could grow into the title," she said offhandedly. I struggled to keep breathing as images of my own small son, dead before he'd opened his eyes to the Savannah sun, overwhelmed my memory. "The ceremony to present him to the others will be next week. You and Zira will of course be the first to greet him and swear fealty to the future king."
I tuned out the rest of her words, my eyes locking with Zira's. Her gaze was sad as she watched my expression. A new heir. For the first time in my life, I wouldn't be the heir to the Pride. I remembered my promise to my father so long ago, to protect the Pride and my brother.
"What will you do now?" Zira asked that night, as we slept in our own quiet corner of Pride Rock.
"I don't know." My voice broke and I had to collect myself before attempting again to speak. "I have nowhere else to go. I promised my father... I think I have to stay and protect my Pride." I could hear the bitterness in my words. With the new cub born, I'd lost what little respect I had in the Pride. I knew the lionesses were cruel to Zira as well, even as they once had been to my own mother. We were Outlanders, even among our own Pride.
"I know, my love. I know."
End
Author's Note:
I wrote this because I've been disappointed by Disney completing changing their villains in the origin stories and, in some cases, removing the actions that made them "villainous" (ex. Cruella). My goal was to tell the story of a Disney villain in a way that made them sympathetic while not erasing their sins. My goal was to tell the story of Scar up to the point when the movie begins while both making him sympathetic and ensuring that no one is truly surprised in his actions in the original story. I'm not sure if I've truly succeeded, but I enjoyed the effort either way.
Ndogo is a nickname. It is Swahili for "small". Think of it like a parent calling their child "little one"
