Disclaimer: Bree and the rules are mine. The rest is not.
Many thanks to my reviewers. There wouldn't be updates without you.
In the weeks after Christmas Bree found Hogwarts to be rather…boring. The major holidays had passed and the next Gryffindor Quidditch game wouldn't be for awhile. Naturally, Bree decided to liven things up.
Dean was on his way back to Gryffindor Tower. He had just finished a Saturday detention with Snape and was looking forward to playing some Exploding Snap before dinner. He turned a corner and found a very strange scene taking place in front of the entrance.
The hallway was covered in rose petals. There was a round table with candles on in in front of the fat lady's portrait. On the side of the table closest to the fat lady there was a painting that depicted a steak. On the other side of the table sat a toad. In front of the toad sat a plate of bugs.
Dean stared at the scene for a moment. Turned around, and went to dinner early.
15. The Fat Lady is not Miss Piggy, Neville's toad, Trevor, is not Kermit the frog and it is wrong to try to set the two up on a date.
Bree was sitting in common room. Nearby Ron, Hermione, and Harry were pouring over books they had gotten from the library. The room was silent except for the crackling of the fire and the occasional turning of pages. It was relaxing, peaceful, boring.
Bree noticed a small spider crawling across the floor. It went over to where the trio was sitting and proceeded to crawl up Ron's leg. It reminded Bree of and old nursery rhyme. How did it go? Oh, right. "The itsy bitsy spider crawled up Ron Weasely's robes…" Bree sang. This caught the trio's attention. It took a moment for the words to sink in, and for Ron to feel the spider's legs tickling his skin. Ron began to scream.
494. Not allowed to sing "The itsy bitsy spider crawled up Ron Weasely's robes…"
Bree had detention with Snape. Her detention was the result of singing in the hallway. Apparently she hadn't learned anything because Snape could still hear her singing "Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na BATMAN!" under her breath, even as she was cleaning out caldrons.
491. Not allowed to sing the Batman theme song when Snape walks by.
Bree was in the common room, reading, when Neville toppled in. How he got that far was a mystery because he was suffering the affects of a leg locker curse. Hermione went to perform the counter curse and Bree left the room while muttering "My Draco needs his butt kicked senses are tingling.
464. I do not have "Draco needs his butt kicked" senses.
Bree found Draco walking down a hall, alone. She quickly hit him with a stunning spell. Once the boy was on the ground she dragged his unconscious form to a nearby closet.
Draco came around about an hour later. He woke to the sound of laughter. When he opened his eyes he saw various people snickering at him as they passed by. Draco was confused. Then he felt a draft. He looked down. He was wearing a frilly pink dress. He quickly ran back to the Slytherin dorm.
298. Not allowed to knock Draco out and put him in a dress.
At the Gryffindor-Hufflepuff Quidditch game the Gryffindor's were disgruntled because Snape was refereeing the game. Bree was taking advantage of the anti-Slytherin sentiment in the stands. She walked up and down the stands, carrying a box and calling "Pictures here! Get your pictures of Malfoy in a dress! Own your very own photo of the Slytherin cross dresser!" So far she had earned a small profit. Five minutes in and the game was over, Harry had caught the snitch. Bree sold the pictures she hadn't managed to sell during the game, during the party in the Gryffindor common room, which Ron, Harry and Hermione were mysteriously absent from.
Around the Easter holidays the teachers started assigning extra homework in order to prepare students for the exams. Because of this Bree was too busy to cause any mischief around the school. Well she did find one thing to do.
Professor McGonagall sighed as she looked over Bree's transfiguration essay.
"I'm really starting to worry about that girl." she muttered, before going to tell Bree that "Bree, your Future Overlord." Was not the proper way to sign her homework.
249. Not allowed to turn in assignments signed "Bree, your Future Overlord."
Even though she was focused on the exams, Bree still noticed that Harry, Ron, and Hermione were sending a lot of time at Hagrid's hut. One day she decided to follow them. As she peeked into a window she saw… was that? It couldn't be! It was! A baby dragon. Harry spotted her through the window and came to the door. "Bree!" he exclaimed. "Did you see it? Um, I mean" "Yes I saw the baby dragon. Now I want a better look." the blond interjected before Harry could form a proper sentence.
Bree entered the hut. Harry followed close behind her. Hagrid looked a bit nervous when he saw Bree, but it quickly dissolved into a kind of parental pride when Bree began fawning over the baby dragon. Bree squealed in delight when the dragon breathed a little bit of flame.
"Hagrid…" Hermione began "too many people are finding out about Norbert. Malfoy could go to Dumbledore at any moment."
"I — I know I can't keep him forever, but I can't jus' dump him, I can't."
Harry suddenly turned to Ron. "Charlie." he said.
"But Harry, he's Ron." Bree stated in confusion.
"No, Charlie, his brother, Charlie. In Romania. Studying dragons. We could send Norbert to him. Charlie can take care of him and then put him back in the wild!"
"Brilliant!" said Ron. "How about it, Hagrid?"
And in the end, Hagrid agreed that they could send an owl to Charlie to ask him.
Bree was totaling neglecting her studies. Instead she was spending every available moment with Hagrid and Norbert. Hargrid told her everything he knew about caring for dragons. She was rather disappointed when she found out that Norbert would be sent away on the upcoming Saturday.
"Mad you are." Ron muttered to her. "What is there to like about a dragon?"
Bree grinned at him. "What his there not to like? It's a fire breathing reptile! Two of my favorite things rolled into one!" she explained excitedly, before going to Hagrid's hut to visit Norbert.
Ron turned to Harry. "Completely nutters, that one." he said.
Now for a song.
The itsy bitsy spider crawled up Ron Weasely's robes, then came the screams as he shook the spider out. Down came the book that squished the spider up. And the itsy bitsy spider never crawled up the robes again.
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