Saturday night came. Sonny had just got done fixing his hair when the doorbell rang. He fixed his shirt as he walked toward the door, opening the door he smiled at Raf who had on a black 3 piece suit with a red pocket square in the breast pocket. Flowers in hand, he handed them to Sonny.
"Raf, these are beautiful." Sonny put them in some water.
As he came back Sonny watched Raf look around his apartment, they had always gone back to his place to lose themselves in each other. Sonny looked down at his outfit compared to Raf's; he felt underdressed. Raf had turned and frowned at him.
"What's wrong Sonny?"
"I feel underdressed."
"You look wonderful." Raf whispered, walked up to him, and kissed his cheek.
Sonny blushed.
Raf smiled, as he nodded his head toward the door and Sonny followed him. 20 minutes later Raf pulled up in front of an expensive Italian place in the city. They both got out of the Uber and Raf reached for Sonny's hand, hesitated then grabbed his hand as they entered.
"2 for Barba."
The hostess hummed, and they followed her to their table.
"Enjoy your dinner."
After ordering they made small talk about their days, both of their families inevitably the latest case. Their dinner arrived and both watched the other eat, both realizing what the other was doing at the same time and laughed. After dinner, they went back to Sonny's apartment. As they walked into the apartment Sonny turned and pulled him close. Raf smiled and kissed him, they stumbled into the bedroom, Raf wasted no time in removing Sonny's shirt and Sonny his. Both fell onto the bed and an hour later Raf was catching his breath, as Sonny peppered his body with kisses as he did he noticed scars all over Raf.
"Rafael… What are the scars from? The ones that look not even two years old."
"As an ADA I can read people well, but when it comes to relationships I can't. I seem to gravitate to people who appear nice but end up being just the opposite. If your father delights in hurting and ridiculing you, maybe there's a reason for that. Healthy relationships are not something I'm used to or deserve I guess.
"Yes, you do. Of course, you deserve a healthy loving relationship, caro. Everyone does."
Raf scoffed.
"Didn't your parents love you? I've met Lucia, she's a proud mami." Sonny said, the Spanish accent rolling off his tongue.
"Mami did….. Dad not so much."
"How?"
"He beat me, most of the fading scars on my body are from him."
"And the newer ones?" Sonny asked.
"Relationship before you, I was in love and didn't realize he was just like my father before it was too late." Raf looked ashamed that he was a DA for special victims and was in the same positions as some of their vics.
Sonny was shocked by this. Raf had hung his hand and was fixing to get up when Sonny wrapped his arms around him and pulled him in for a kiss.
"Raf, you deserve somebody who loves you." Sonny whispered, pulling him to lay beside him.
Raf followed his lead, laying down and letting Sonny. The next week was bad, the case SVU was investigating was going haywire, court also ended badly with the offender being let go on bail. Sonny was surprised to see Raf at home when he got home. He suspected he'd be staying in the office all night to figure out a way to fix everything. Raf was sitting on the couch in shorts and white t-shirt. Sonny sat beside him, taking a drink of the scotch Raf had poured for him. After taking a long drink, he looked at Raf. He leaned over, wrapping an arm around him saying,
"Let's go to bed, Rafael."
Raf tensed slightly and followed him. As they walked toward their bedroom, Sonny noticed Raf was getting more tense, very tense.
"Rafael, what's wrong?"
As he shut the door Raf stood there staring straight ahead. His face was blank but the rhythmic clenching of muscles showed his agitation.
"What's my punishment going to be?"
Sonny had been walking over to sit down on the bed, he stopped looking at him.
"Punishment? What are you talking about?"
"I always get punished when I don't do good in court or school."
"Since when?"
"Since I was 7."
"I'm assuming school was your father, what do you mean about court?"
"My ex would always punish me when things went bad or I lost."
Sonny couldn't believe that.
"Raf, I will never hurt you for not doing good in court or anything on purpose. I don't do relationships like that."
"Really?" He asked confused and doubt clear in his voice.
"Yes. Come on, let's go to bed. I'm exhausted." Sonny laid down.
Raf hesitated and cautiously did so, Sonny gently pulled him closer and kissed his temple. They both laid there until Sonny felt Raf's breathless hiccups. Sonny looked down at his boyfriend, he lifted his head with a finger under Raf's chin. Sonny kissed him softly and whispered,
"No more of that, I love you. You're not going to ever experience any more pain or abuse if I can help it."
Raf nodded and kissed him again. After a few minutes, Sonny felt Raf go limp as he listened to his breathing. Sonny wondered how someone like Rafael had a heart of gold and had such a dark past. Sonny felt a rush of pride in his chest for the guy who had stolen his heart.
"Night Rafael." Sonny whispered, as he fell asleep.
