I would like to thank all of my reviewers and as thanks for your reviews I give you this important life lesson. Do not stick chapstick up your nose, it hurts. If you absolutely need to stick chapstick in your nose, make sure someone is around to help you get it out. That is all. Now on to the chapter!
The weather got worse and worse as the date of Gryffindor's first Quidditch match of the season approached. Bree found out that the Slytherin's would not be playing against Gryffindor as was planned. Instead, they'd be playing against Hufflepuff, because, apparently, Draco's back was acting up.
The day before the match, the winds reached howling point and the rain fell harder than ever. It was so dark inside the corridors and classrooms that extra torches and lanterns were lit. The Slytherin team was looking very smug indeed, and none more so than Malfoy.
"Ah, if only my back was feeling a bit better!" he sighed as the gale outside pounded the windows.
"You know…" Bree began catching the attention of everyone nearby. "Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them." She stared right at Draco in order to prove her point.
Draco flinched and moved to hide behind Goyle.
543. Not allowed to say "Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them" and then stare pointedly at Draco.
Harry was ten minutes late to Defense Against the Dark Arts that day.
"Sorry I'm late, Professor Lupin. I —"
But it wasn't Professor Lupin who looked up at him from the teacher's desk; it was Snape.
"This lesson began ten minutes ago, Potter, so I think we'll make it ten points from
Gryffindor. Sit down."
But Harry didn't move.
"Where's Professor Lupin?" he asked.
"He says he is feeling too ill to teach today," Snape responded with a twisted smile. "I believe I told you to sit down?"
But Harry stayed where he was.
"What's wrong with him?"
Snape's black eyes glittered.
"Nothing life-threatening," he said, looking as though he wished it were. "Five more points from Gryffindor, and if I have to ask you to sit down again, it will be fifty."
Harry walked slowly to his seat and sat down. Snape looked around at the class.
"As I was saying before Potter interrupted, Professor Lupin has not left any record of the topics you have covered so far —"
"Please, sir, we've done Boggarts, Red Caps, Kappas, and Grindylows," said Hermione quickly, "and we're just about to start"
"Be quiet," said Snape coldly, cutting her off. "I did not ask for information. I was merely commenting on Professor Lupin's lack of organization."
"He's the best Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher we've ever had," said Dean Thomas boldly, and there was a murmur of agreement from the rest of the class. Snape looked more menacing than ever.
"You are easily satisfied. Lupin is hardly overtaxing you. I would expect first years to be able to deal with Red Caps and Grindylows."
"It's not his fault our past two professors were incompetent. Did you know that Lockhart just reenacted his "heroic exploits" after the pixie incident?" Bree interjected.
Snape ignored her. "Today we shall discuss" he flipped through the textbook, all the way to one of the back chapters.
"werewolves." he said.
"But, sir," Hermione protested, seemingly unable to restrain herself, "we're not supposed to do werewolves yet, we're due to start Hinkypunks."
"Miss Granger," Snape said in a voice of deadly calm, "I was under the impression that I am teaching this lesson, not you."
And I am telling you all to turn to page 394." He glanced around again. "All of you! Now!"
With many bitter sidelong looks and some sullen muttering, the class opened their books.
"Which of you can tell me how we distinguish between the werewolf and the true wolf?" Snape asked.
Everyone sat in motionless silence; everyone except Hermione, whose hand, as it so often did, had shot straight into the air.
"Anyone?" Snape said, ignoring Hermione. His twisted smile was back.
Bree lazily lifted her hand into the air.
"Smith." Snape said with a frown.
"I don't know, I just wanted to reveal a secret of life. You suck at it." Bree answered.
The class knew instantly she'd gone too far. Snape advanced on Bree slowly, and the room held its breath.
"Detention, Smith." Snape said silkily, his face very close to Bree's.
Bree just smirked in an amused fashion.
For the rest of the lesson, they sat and made notes on werewolves from the textbook, while Snape prowled up and down the rows of desks, examining the work they had been doing with Professor Lupin.
"Very poorly explained… That is incorrect, the Kappa is more commonly found in
Mongolia… Professor Lupin gave this eight out of ten? I wouldn't have given it three…"
"That's because you're a spiteful man that hates everyone who isn't a Slytherin, and I wouldn't be surprised if you secretly despise them too." Bree muttered under her breath.
"What was that Smith?" Snape growled.
"Just commenting on how much you hate the world and everything in it." Bree replied with false sweetness.
"Twenty points from Gryffindor, Smith." Snape snarled.
When the bell rang at last, Snape held them back.
"You will each write an essay, to be handed in to me, on the ways you recognize and kill werewolves. I want two rolls of parchment on the subject, and I want them by Monday morning. It is time somebody took this class in hand. Smith, stay behind, we need to arrange your detention."
638. When Snape calls on me to answer a question not allowed to say "I don't know, I just wanted to reveal a secret of life. You suck at it."
Bree's detention was scrubbing bedpans in the hospital wings. Bree actually didn't find this so bad. Cleaning her cat's litter box was actually a lot worse.
The next day was the day of the Gryffindor/Hufflepuff match. It was storming outside. Bree almost expected to see Hagrid building an ark.
Quidditch was so popular that the whole school turned out to watch the match as usual, despite the storm. But they ran down the lawns toward the Quidditch field, heads bowed against the ferocious wind, umbrellas being whipped out of their hands as they went. Bree saw Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle, laughing and pointing at Harry from under an enormous umbrella on their way to the stadium. Bree made a mental not to make sure that Malfoy "accidentally" fell in the mud.
The wind was so strong that the teams staggered sideways as they walked out onto the field. The Captains walked up to each other and shook hands; Diggory smiled at Wood but Wood now looked as though he had lockjaw and merely nodded. The teams mounted their brooms. Madam Hooch put her whistle to her lips and gave it a blast that sounded shrill and distant, and they were off.
And Bree could barely see what was happening because of the rain. It was just dark shapes moving about and you couldn't tell which team was which, and the rain was only getting worse.
With the first flash of lightning came the sound of Madam Hooch's whistle. Apparently someone had called for a time-out.
Minutes later the teams were in the air again.
Lightning flashed and thunder clapped. It was getting dangerous to be out there. More lightning, then something odd began happening. An eerie silence was falling across the stadium. The wind, though as strong as ever, was forgetting to roar. It was as though someone had turned off the sound. And then a horribly familiar wave of cold swept over Bree. Dementors had invaded the pitch. One of the players fell off of their broom. Dumbledore cast a spell that slowed the falling player's descent, then turned to the Dementors and cast a spell that shot slivery stuff at them, making them flee.
Dumbledore then magicked the player onto a stretcher. As she moved closer Bree could tell that the still and unmoving player was Harry.
In the hospital wing, Bree, Ron, Hermione, and the Gryffindor Quidditch team, minus their Captain, were gathered around Harry's bed. None of them had taken the time to clean up after coming in from the rain, and the Qudditch team was covered in mud, while Bree, Ron, and Hermione were soaked. Bree had stolen blankets from several beds and after one had soaked up water, she switched to a drier one.
This process continued until Bree was significantly drier than her housemates, and she had bundled herself under three blankets. She was muttering things like "Stupid rain. Stupid Britain. Stupid Dementors. Stupid fudge." and "If it ever rained this much in California, they'd declare a state of emergency." Also, Katie Bell would later swear that she had heard the blond third year humming "I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor."
Finally Harry woke up.
"Harry!" Fred, who looked extremely white underneath the mud, exclaimed. "How're you feeling?"
"What happened?" Harry asked, sitting up so suddenly they all gasped.
"You fell off," Fred answered. "Must've been, what, fifty feet?"
"We thought you'd died." Alicia, who was shaking, said.
Hermione made a small, squeaky noise. Her eyes were extremely bloodshot.
"But the match," said Harry. "What happened? Are we doing a replay?"
"That's what you're worried about!" Bree exclaimed. "But the match, he says. The pitch was full of Dementors, you nearly died, and you're worried about a game!"
There was a moment of silence after Bree had stopped shouting, everyone was waiting for Madam Pomfrey to come kick them out. When she didn't they figured it was because Bree and taken over the job of scolding Harry.
"Oh, and you lost." Bree added.
"Diggory got the Snitch," said George. "Just after you fell. He didn't realize what had happened. When he looked back and saw you on the ground, he tried to call it off. Wanted a rematch. But they won fair and square… even Wood admits it."
"Where is Wood?" said Harry, suddenly realizing he wasn't there.
"Still in the showers," said Fred. "We think he's trying to drown himself."
"That's dumb. If he wants to kill himself he should find a bathtub, or go to the lake." Bree commented.
Fred stared at her. "Later on, we're going to have a nice long talk about why that was completely the wrong response to hearing that someone might be trying to kill themselves, but for now we're going to focus on Harry." he told her.
Bree made an unhappy noise.
Turning back to Harry Fred said "It's not over yet. We lost by a hundred points."
"Right? So if Hufflepuff loses to Ravenclaw and we beat Ravenclaw and Slytherin…"
"Hufflepuff'll have to lose by at least two hundred points," said George.
"But if they beat Ravenclaw…"
"No way, Ravenclaw is too good. But if Slytherin loses against Hufflepuff…"
"It all depends on the points, a margin of a hundred either way."
After ten minutes or so, Madam Pomfrey came over to tell the team to leave him in peace.
"We'll come and see you later," Fred told him. "Don't beat yourself up Harry, you're still the best Seeker we've ever had."
The team trooped out, trailing mud behind them. Bree was about to leave as well when she did something that you shouldn't do in front of Madam Pomfrey, especially not when you're already in the hospital wing. She sneezed.
While the nurse was checking her over, Bree heard Hermione talking to Harry.
"Dumbledore was really angry. I've never seen him like that before. He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wand, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wand at the Dementors. Shot silver stuff at them. They left the stadium right away… He was furious they'd come onto the grounds. We heard him —"
"Then he magicked you onto a stretcher," said Ron. "And walked up to school with you floating on it. Everyone thought you were…"
"Did someone get my Nimbus?"
Ron and Hermione looked quickly at each other.
"Er —"
"What?" said Harry, looking from one to the other.
"Well… when you fell off, it got blown away," said Hermione hesitantly.
"And?"
"And it hit, it hit, oh, Harry, it hit the Whomping Willow."
"And?" he said, dreading the answer.
"Well, you know the Whomping Willow," said Ron. "It — it doesn't like being hit."
"Professor Flitwick brought it back just before you came around," said Hermione in a very small voice.
Slowly, she reached down for a bag at her feet, turned it upside down, and tipped a dozen bits of splintered wood and twig onto the bed, the only remains of Harry's faithful, finally beaten broomstick.
Bree didn't hear anything else that might have been said because she was trying to convince Madam Pomfrey that, no, she wasn't getting sick, it was just because of dust, and she didn't need a pepper-up potion, thank you very much, so just put it back where it came from.
Bree was finally allowed to leave the hospital wing after, quite grudgingly, agreeing to take a pepper-up potion. Harry, however, had to stay for the weekend.
On Monday Bree, along with everyone else, was happy to see that Professor Lupin was well enough to teach his class. Upon finding out about the essay that Snape had assigned, Professor Lupin informed the class that they wouldn't have to do it. The only one disappointed by this news was Hermione, who had already finished it.
It was mid-November and most of the students noticed that Snape was becoming increasingly paranoid. This was probably due to the fact that Bree had taken to grinning manically at the potions professor whenever she encountered him. In potions class she would look up from her caldron with a grin. In the hall she would stop mid-conversation and grin until he passed by. And the situation was made worse when the Weasley twins had followed her example.
One day, at dinner, Bree had a spur of the moment idea. She had noticed Snape about to take his first sip of pumpkin juice, and she immediately looked excited. Snape noticed this, stared at her, then put his drink down. Bree forced herself to look disappointed.
George leaned over. "What did you do to his drink?" he asked in a whisper.
"Absolutely nothing." Bree whispered back.
"So then why did you look so excited?" George asked.
"Same reason I've been grinning at him. It messes with his head." Bree answered.
The next day, Snape finally confronted Bree.
"What did you do?" he practically growled.
Bree smirked. "I haven't done anything Professor." she responded.
"Lies! You and your conspirators have been planning something, I know it!" Snape exclaimed.
"Feeling a bit paranoid are we Professor? Good, that was the whole point. You see while I haven't done anything, making you think I did was the point." Bree replied.
Snape stared at Bree. "You would have done well in Slytherin." he said after a moment.
Bree shrugged. "The hat said it didn't want me that close to the foundation of the school." she answered.
639. Not allowed to grin manically at Snape.
640. Not allowed to look excited when Snape is about to drink his pumpkin juice, and disappointed when he puts it down without taking a sip.
You know, I've been thinking, a lot of Harry Potter fiction includes romance, so my question for you readers is, should Bree be paired with anyone, and if so who?
That is all, review please!
