I understood now why the Cullens had such a fascination for fast cars. Now I could move fast, being restricted in a car that wouldn't go above sixty sounded exhausting and, quite frankly, tedious. Edward's Volvo still smelt distantly of him and my favourite body wash; strawberry scented, and I couldn't stop thinking about it for the entire drive. My hands would caress the wheel as his had once done, press against the gear shift just as his had ; everything I was doing, he had once done in this car of his.
It was, officially, all I had left of his. The clothes — they were Rosalie and Alice's, but this? This was his. The jacket I had so desperately cocooned myself in for months after their sudden upheaval had been burned along with the clothes I had died in. So this car? I would cherish. For eternity, if that was possible. But knowing full well it wasn't, I would take care of it until it was nothing more than a giant rusted pile of scrap. I should hate him, I should blame him for the fact that he left me here alone for months. I should hate him for the fact that now I was burdened to live forever without him in my life. I wanted him to change me, to be there for me and to love me. To hold my hand for those three days of pain, to talk to me while I laid there. I wanted his golden specked eyes to be the first things I laid eyes on when I awoke.
Instead all I felt was pain, all I heard was silence, and all I saw was the rain soaked ground as I woke up face down in the woods.
A part of me was so undeniably devastated and hurt that he couldn't be there for me. But, he also couldn't have predicted this. He left to protect me. I recall all the times he had professed his undying love for me, had told me that I was his life; there is no way that in the span of one night that could've all changed. I was good enough for him. He wanted me. He just didn't want me in danger.
A small sigh surpassed my lips as I glanced up at the next sign to come into view; OREGON. I knew that was to be my temporary salvation. I needed to hunt, I need to recuperate for a few days at least and I couldn't keep driving around in this car in search of a home when I knew I would never find another home again.
"Can I, uh —" I struggled to finish my sentence as I stared at the receptionist in front of me. Him, like all the other men I had seen since I had stepped out of my car, could do nothing but stare at me in bewilderment and. . . lust? It was akin to how women used to stare at the Cullen men, and how human males used to the stare at the Cullen women whenever they had dazzled them. A term I had once coined as a joke much to the vampires' dismay, but now it made so much sense. It was an appropriate term for what I was doing to this man without even wanting anything more than a room I was more than happy to pay for.
"Can I please rent out a room? I'll only be here for — for a week, maximum." I nodded my head once as I finally managed to finish my sentence, distracting myself from his unwavering gaze.
"Yes ma'am." He nodded his head once as he fumbled around beneath the desk, retrieving one key. Hanging off of it was a silver dogtag that read '202', and I flashed him a slight smile as I pushed my card across the desk. I had no qualms about using my card. I was eighteen, an adult. I had left a note. Charlie couldn't track me or my spending across the states. I wasn't even technically a missing person. I was just. . . gone. Though, I could be found if he hired a PI, as pricey as they were. I would have to take care in not staying here long and draining my account soon. Maybe Jasper's friend J. Jenks could help me, he had told me once that this man had helped him out of many troubles before. It was almost as if he knew some day I would need him to, and maybe I would endeavour to find the man and start a proper new life. Who knew? I had so much to do, and a lot of time to do it but my emotions — they were too much. I couldn't find time to think about it right now.
Funny, how much I had saved up as a teenager. When living with Renee I had several small jobs that I would partake in after school and on weekends: library help, tutoring, cashier, babysitting. Whatever came my way I would seize the opportunity. I had saved all this money up and yet, once I had stepped foot in Forks, I had ceased to need the money I had worked for; Cullens and their damned hospitality.
God, I missed them. Heightened emotions and all that. It hurt, I had realised. Not being able to cry, the entire journey was accompanied by tears in my eyes that could never spill. It hadn't let up when I had gotten to the hotel, and I doubt it would ever let up again.
After ringing up my card, he would push the small object back to me. I noticed he had charged a lot less than what I had calculated, but I said nothing. If that was one perk to being a vampire, I would take it. And, more importantly, if I stared at the man for any longer I feared that I would sink my teeth into his skin and drain him of his life force. Twisting the key around my index finger, I would start the descent up the winding stair case in search of room 202.
In all honesty? The taste of deers were not that bad. Indeed, the very thought of my old vices like burgers, pizza and chocolate cake now made me gag — but I thought the taste of blood would be everything to me. I was left full and hydrated, but my tastebuds were disappointed. I had hope that this was get easier as time went on. Maybe I would eventually come to actually like the taste of these woodland creatures. Then again, the feeling of thirst had not left me and I doubt it never would. I would be full, but always needing more. That thought alone made me miserable.
These brown contacts I had put in less than an hour ago were already starting to burn and I felt them start to evaporate. These were the fifth pair I'd put in today, and, until my eyes turned that golden shade I longed for, I knew I would be spending thousands a month on these small discs. That being said, they had gotten me these far and I'd rather people be lusting after me than fearing me, and I knew that if I dared to allow my red eyes to be seen, there would be too much fear. Too much noise. Too much attention.
Then again. . . maybe some attention was better than this overwhelming sense of loneliness I felt that consumed me. I felt like I was trapped. Like I was invisible, on a planet filled with love and unions but being ultimately alone. It hurt. And when I thought about how lonely I felt, that void in my heart was ripped open once again like a floodgate and pain seared through my body. I hissed involuntarily, hands clutching at my chest as if me holding myself would do anything to quell this sense of hurt that I felt. It was like each little muscle, each little tissue fibre inside of me was being ripped apart. Like I was being ripped apart. I was half the person I used to be and I was cursed to be like this forever now.
Enough self loathing, Bella.
Shaking myself out of my thoughts, I'd make quick work of disposing of the creature I held in my arms and then, dusting myself off, I'd leave behind the forest — full of blood, but still feeling empty.
"You look like you need some help," were the first words I would hear as I stepped into my temporary apartment. I should've sensed a vampire, really, they had a distinct smell around them but — well, hey. I am kinda new to all this. As observant as I had been as a human, and as heightened as this sense was now I was a vampire, with everything I was feeling I had completely abandoned my instinctual feelings; I had completely neglected to be careful.
"Wha —?" Turning around quickly, I'd move from the front door to the corner of the room in an act of defence in less than a second. Crouching low on the countertop of the makeshift kitchen, I'd show off my teeth, venom pooling in my mouth as a hiss sounded from me.
Okay, Bella. This is what you do now, totally normal. You're defending yourself against — who?
A man stood in front of me, short black hair, red eyes and a dazzling smile — another vampire. Was I encroaching on his land? I had heard of how some covens did not take very kindly to nomads trespassing on their established land, had witnessed it firsthand with James, Laurent and Victoria. But, hell if I couldn't defend myself. Instantly, another hiss sounded from me followed by a noise akin to a growl. I let the heels of my feet press against the ground beneath me, ready to launch up if needs be. Or forward, if the situation became dire.
"No, I come in peace!" He'd hold his hands in the air as if this would serve any proof that he was in fact not here for conflict. Despite being untrusting of him, I found myself abandoning my position to instead stand in front of the counter instead.
"My name is Luca. Just Luca, really. I forgot my last name years ago and I just pick whichever I see fit based on the place I go to. . . me and my coven, we live here, this is our land. Not that we care if other's come here, you know, just don't pick fights with us. We can be territorial if we need to be. I just. . . you're obviously a newborn and if you need help, I can provide that for you. I've been doing this for decades. Since nineteen thirty seven."
I'd nod my head once, still unable to speak but some small amount of trust wormed its way from the pits of my stomach and the venom in my mouth cleared up and I found myself at his side in a millisecond. I had no choice but to trust them, they were the first of my kind I had seen since my transformation and I didn't need aged vampire enemies one day into this new life. I didn't want to spend eternity running, I refused to. Niceties were necessity.
"Bella," I'd mumble pathetically. This man could be taking me to my death for all I knew, if he was that upset with me. If he wasn't who he said he was. . . and yeah, I didn't want to spend eternity running, but could I even care to? I had lost everything. I only wanted eternity with one family and now I was alone. Maybe making one enemy would be beneficial after all.
He grinned at me then, and then he'd say "come out," softly, quickly. No human eavesdropping would ever hear, but it was loud to me. For a second I looked bewildered — confused, unknowing of what he was speaking to. Was it me? Was he telling me to come out from the corner?
And then two men and two women emerged from my bedroom. I was immediately on edge again. Trust was not something I gave away easily now, and I felt severely outnumbered.
"This is Elijah, Iman, Kayla and Natalia."
Each vampire would throw me a smile, lifting their hand up in an amicable wave. They seemed friendly enough at least, Luca, Elijah, Iman and Kayla. Natalia was still hidden behind the large frame that was Iman's body as he glanced down at me. Strangely enough, he reminded me of Emmett. Buff, tall. The works. It was strange, really. They were all so beautiful but something about them, as friendly as they seemed, didn't look right. Blame it on my trust issues, I suppose. Damn it, I'm really going to struggle to find friends in this life and its all my fault.
And then. . . I saw her. Clear as day. My eyes would focus on her hair; curls framing a pale face, blood thirsty eyes, a scar.
"No," I mumbled. This was a trap, there was absolutely no way this was all coincidental.
The woman, Natalia, she advanced upon me with the look of a victor; all smirks and knowing glances as she looked down on me.
"Bella," she'd murmur my name in a simper, her eyebrow slightly arched. Instincts told me to run, but as I went to move, I felt six hands grasp at my arms to lock me into place. As a newborn, I was strong. But against five vampires? I was still outnumbered.
"I am building an army, Bella." She said it as if it was obvious, "and I knew from the second I first laid eyes on you that you were special. I read your aura, and it's powerful. I don't exactly know what you possess . . . it's very rare for me to see such power radiating from a mortal, but when I do, god, they are exceptional when they're one of us. I did what I needed to do to you, and now. . . now you are going to pay me back. You are mine, Isabella."
Oh, fuck.
Hey guys! Sorry for a delayed update but thank you for staying with this story and thank you so much for the kind reviews I have been left so far, you're all so kind and I appreciate you all.
Small note, I know J Jenks doesn't come in to play until Breaking Dawn but for the sake of this story set during New Moon I thought it would be beneficial to introduce him in passing. Inaccurate I know, but Bella will have to think about things like this at some point!
Thank you again for reading this story! I hope you enjoyed this chapter.
