Happy Valentine's day my fellow loners and screw you those in a happy, loving relationship. I got this idea from a sound on TikTok and I own nothing. TikTok sound by chezaidan
Grape-Flavored Toaster
(February 14, 2148)
Valentine's Day is a wondrous day full of love and compassion. It is for all of those who are happily in love. However, for those who aren't in love or are single, Valentine's Day is a hated holiday that exemplifies everything they wish they had. That was especially true for Minoru Mineta. The resident pervert of UA's hero course hated this holiday with a fiery passion. This year especially, because all of the girls from his class were dating other people.
Inside the Heights Alliance dorm, it was an almost sickly sweet picture by all of the couples. Izuku and Ochako were on the ceiling by using their respective quirks, slow dancing to music only they could hear. Eijiro and Mina were sitting in front of the television playing the video game "It Takes Two". Shoto and Momo were sitting at the eating room table playing multiple intense and fun rounds of chess. Tsuyu and Fumikage were snuggled up together on the couch under a cozy blanket reading books on different kinds of amphibians and avians. Mashirao and Toru were in the kitchen, playfully teasing and messing with each other as they tried to make sweets for everyone. Finally, Kyouka and Denki were also snuggled up on the couch, but they were listening to music on their earbuds as they enjoyed each other's company.
Or at least that is what Kyouka wished was happening, but her boyfriend wasn't paying attention to her or the music that was playing. He kept looking around the dorm every few minutes as if he were looking for someone. At first, she ignored it, but after an hour of this, it was starting to annoy her.
Looking up at her boyfriend, Kyouka starts to talk, "Pikachu, I thought we were supposed to spend some time together today. What the heck are you looking for?"
"Sorry, Kyouka. I know you wanted to spend time together, but I'm worried about Mineta. This is the first Valentine's Day that he's going to spend without me." Denki said with an apologetic look on his face.
"Sounds like you two used to date."
"It wasn't like that. Please don't tease me Kyouka. I'm actually worried about him."
"Hahaha, sorry Sparky. What did you guys use to do on Valentine's Day when you were both single?"
"We use to spend all day in his room making a ranking list of all the sexiest heroines and just hang as bros. Now that you and I are dating, I don't know what he's going to do alone." He says with a concerned face.
Kyouka reaches her hand up and places it on her boyfriend's cheek to get him to look at her. " I'm sure the little pervert will be fine. I mean, what's the worst that could happen?"
Almost as if he were waiting for his cue, the door to the dorm is violently kicked open and slams into the wall, gaining the attention of everyone in the room. There, standing in the doorway is the miniature grape himself, with an incredibly disturbing smile on his face. After a pause, Minoru starts walking in a slow but peppy fashion while humming a tune. He walks over into the kitchen, jumps onto the counter, unplugs the toaster, and continues his walk out of the room and towards the back of the building with the toaster under his arm.
Everyone watching is thoroughly confused by his behavior. They've never seen the perverted juice box act like this. As he's walking back, it looks like he is going to go for the elevator so the onlookers assume he is going back to his room. That is until he started singing his tune with that creepy smile still on his face.
"Every day,
I'm getting closer,
Gonna take a bath,
With the fucking toaster!"
After he finished singing the last verse, Minoru walked directly into the guy's bathing area.
Everyone watching was frozen in shock by Minoru's song for a few moments until the meaning of the lyrics smacked them upside the head.
"You don't think…"
"Nah, he wouldn't."
"But he is holding the toaster."
"But there's no way he would actually do it. Right?"
Another pause before they heard water running and all the couples spang into a panicked frenzy as all of the guys present rushed for the bathroom.
"MINETA DON'T DO IT!"
