dear diary.
I hate this town. I hate it soo much. This town full to the brim with liars and hypocrites. These people who willingly go out of their way to make sure you stay put in place, spouting bullshit while proclaiming their sainthood, judging you from their high horse, for them you are nothing but a helpless peasant that doesn't know right from wrong, it is their duty, their noblesse oblige if you will, to guide you to the correct path.
If you dare stray from their designated path, they'll snap your fucking neck with not an ounce of hesitation (Well, not literally, but they might as well.), all in the name of the greater good.
All they care about is their image, and how perfect they look with that pretty little halo over their heads, like angels sent from heaven.
The funny thing is they don't even know who they are. They just stand on a stage waiting for instructions, like actors, waiting for [them] to reveal to them the new script. They don't even decide for themselves, every action, every word, each and every single thought is being conceived only to appease [them] and their new script (norm).
They're fucking puppets and they don't even realize, maybe they don't care, maybe in their fucked up little heads they think ' free will is but a small price to pay in order to fit in '. I say to hell with that, can you even call your self human at that point, isn't the essence of being human agonising, struggling, so helplessly and vainly to preserve your own ideals, to prove to the gods above that you are indeed human, and that not even a being from the heavens can strip of your will, and that you'd drive yourself mad, you'd ruin yourself just to spite those arrogant intellectuals who think that they can predict human behaviour. Maybe they can. But I'd be dammed if I allowed them to prove that I'm but a machine that follows silly patterns and acts upon them. I'd even challenge the gods above if they wished to restrain me, to urge me to act a certain way in fear of burning in hell.
A real human would cast himself into that pit out of spite to demonstrate that he can't be ordered.
I'd rather do the wrong thing on my accord than do the right thing off of someone else's demand.
And for that, they sought to dismiss me, to reject me, to degrade me and disregard my individuality as nothing but a disease.
No, that was not the only reason.
They shunned me because i looked different, I acted different, I wasn't versed enaugh in their social sophistry to keep up with them, my ideals were different, while they sought comfort, I searched for the truth, while they took refuge in the status quo, I ventured onwards looking for that genuine thing, that mythical thing that I wasn't even sure it existed, and whether I deserved it or not, but I was sure of one thing I wanted it! , I wanted it with all my heart!
So I'll ask you again, how come you people serve your freedom, your thought, your essence, on a silver platter to [them]. Have you no shame! Do you not have any ideals which you wish to uphold with your utmost being?
Are you guys even human?
page 37.
