V.

Ritsuko was staring at the operational timetable for unit 02 while she waited. The sound of boots came to a stop beside her chair, making her look up. Then she looked back down at the reports. "You're back early. I thought you'd squeeze everything you could out of your vacation."

Misato Katsuragi was standing with her arms crossed as she stared out the large bay window at Evangelion unit 02. "I wouldn't really call it a vacation." Misato said and stepped closer to the glass with a serious tone. She stared at unit 02.

Ritsuko turned back to the troubling reports when Misato interrupted her thinking once more. "My mother is dying. This was the last chance I had to see her."

That got Ritsuko to look up again, Misato almost never spoke of her family. Re-focusing her full attention on Misato, Ritsuko said, "This is unusual for you. I thought you and your mother were estranged."

"We were, until she invited me to Okinawa personally." Misato said. "I went thinking I'd squeeze a free vacation out of it and blow her off. Then she told me she's dying and…"

Misato trailed off there, not sure how to quantify her mother's apology in the words that would do it justice. Misato went on, "She admitted to being scared, back then. Between the hell of the second impact and my status as… as…" She shook her head and clenched her fist to push past the memories. "As a traumatized survivor clammed up behind classified doors, what could she do? She was pushed out of my life and had no way of getting back in. So, she focused on my brother… and left me to rot. Even though… even…" She shook her head as she cut off again and took a breath.

Misato sighed and swung a hand idly as she debated sharing what she felt. "The fucked up thing about it?" She pressed out, "I wished I had that chance with her, too. I spent more than five minutes with her as an adult and find out she's one of the most fun people I met. Now… now there are no more tomorrows for us to try again." Misato lapsed into silence.

Ritsuko watched her friend for a moment more. Then, looking down at the reports, she went on, "That's more than I got with mine. At least you had the chance to say goodbye." Ritsuko turned a page but stopped. Misato had just opened up to ger on a personal matter… something she hadn't done, recently. "My sympathies, Misato."

The woman with the lavender hair said nothing. Her head lifted and she looked at unit 02. "How is she doing?"

Ritsuko glanced down the length of the hall. The tandem docking cages were a new arrangement; one central hallway with large bay windows on either side looking into unit 01 and 02's cages. Leading into the test there were very few people here yet. Ritsuko glanced at the time. Five till.

Ritsuko also knew why Misato was asking her and not Kyoko. "She's stable for now, but I'm worried for other reasons. We should be considerate of our equipment up-time. I would have appreciated more time to warm up Unit 01 before Shinji's first test… but the Ikaris had other plans."

Misato winced. Finally she turned away from unit 02 and approached her friend. "Kyoko's going to be here any moment. Anything I should know before she's in earshot?"

"Nothing that isn't obvious already… except one thing." She looked up. "Kyoko is being tapped for a special project. It's too high for my clearance, but I did get a letter saying I might be expected to bow to her authority and provide staff for something called 'Project-D'."

"What's that?"

"I don't know. Clearance is executive level, which means the Ikaris, Subcommander Fuyutsuki, and now Kyoko."

Misato thought of the Venn diagram in her head between Kyoko and Ritsuko's departments. "If the pilots are in danger I want you to let me know."

"I'll do what I can." Ritsuko replied as both women looked at the entrance to the hall. A crowd of people were streaming into the hallway now, headed by Kyoko. It was Evangelion 02's German speaking technical support team.

Kyoko's eyes scanned the hall. "Where are the children?"

Ritsuko answered, "I haven't seen them."

"They're late." Kyoko grunted. "Let's get this over with. I have work to do."

She turned and started speaking in German to the lead of Evangelion 02's technical team, a nervous looking westerner. Misato and Ritsuko exchanged glances.


Asuka had taken one look down the corridor between both cages to see her mother, then backed up the two of them to be out of sight. Shinji balked. "W-wait where are we going?"

"...we need to get to our Evas." Asuka said. She pointed beyond the door to the operations hall. " There's a stairway on the far side of that which leads up to your boarding gantry. Just go up that, the tech crew will show you the rest."

Shinji hesitated. "C-can't you just come with me?"

Asuka blinked. She realized then that she could use helping Shinji as cover for her tardiness. It might mean throwing him under the bus though, and looking at his boyish looks, she didn't like the idea of using him.

He did need her help, though.

"Okay, I can help you." She said, "but let's be quick, I need to board my Eva and both of us are late."

The teens flew up the long steps. Shinji kept looking over the railing to his left to examine his assigned Evangelion unit. "It… it's huge!"

"Stop gawking and move it! Imagine we're in combat!"

"C-combat?"

"Just hurry!" Asuka called back.

They made it to the gantry and the technical team all looked up. Asuka pointed. "That's the entry plug. You sit in that, that goes into your Evangelion, and you pilot it."

Shinji, beside her, swallowed nervously. He asked her under his breath, "i-is it…safe?"

Asuka wasn't sure how to answer him. She wanted to reassure him… but also tell him the truth. "For this, yes." She decided to tell him. "It's different when we fight."

Shinji looked at her, looked at the deck as he gripped his fists, then said, "Okay. Thank you."

She smiled. "No problem."

Shinji smiled back. "Okay." He said, then he started walking to the plug. Asuka watched him go up to it, step in from assistance with the techs, then he glanced at her and gave a wave.

She waved back as the plug closed and reminded her she really needed to board her unit. She whirled and ran across the connecting gantry to her unit.


As much as she could, Asuka flew through the start-up procedure. Every time she forgot about the odd startup messages, and every time they always gave her pause.

Kind allies are always welcome.

Did… did her Evangelion just approve of Shinji?!

Her mother appeared in a comm window. " You're late Asuka, after I specifically instructed you not to be."

She tried to keep her cool. "Shinji arrived after me and asked for my help. I didn't think it was a problem."

"No. He is not your responsibility, leave him to the deck crews and Katsuragi. You focus on yourself and your responsibilities, understood?"

"Yes, mother."

"Sufficient. Stand by, we will begin synchronization tests momentarily… after the Third Children stops hyperventilating."

Asuka thought she could hear Shinji's wailing through the comm to her mother. Asuka smirked, "I forgot to warn him about that part."

"If the Third can't handle the mere startup sequence, he has no business being here. Stand by Asuka." Her mother signed off.

Asuka leaned back into the plug, grateful now for her mother's absence but wondering what Shinji was going through. She was tempted to open a comm to him but decided against it. She would be a distraction. And mother would chastise her for interfering.


Misato's attention had been going back and forth between both Evangelion teams. Though she wanted to get to know this Shinji better, she had been concerned about Asuka on some level ever since picking her up from the airport.

She wasn't deaf either.

Ritsuko and her assistant, Maya, we're working with Shinji to start establishing the baseline sync. Misato was facing that station but her ears had been trained behind her.

Ritsuko caught Misato's attention when she told Shinji, "We're ready to begin, Shinji. Start at sequence, set."

"U-uh, set." Shinji replied and took a breath, then let it out.

Maya spoke into the pickup, "Shinji, just keep breathing okay? Don't worry about anything else. The best read is when your mind is calm."

"Oh…okay…" a breathy Shinji replied. Misato was looking at his vitals and saw his heart rate decrease as he calmed down.

Then Misato glanced at Asuka's. The elevated heart rate was visible. Then Misato's eyes jumped to Kyoko, who she saw in a glance was looking at Shinji's vitals.

Then the doctor leaned over to the microphone pickup into Unit 02.. "Sie können Asuka beginnen."

"Ja, mutter." was the response, monotone.

Misato turned her head back to Shinji's station, but she side-eyed the other end of the room.


As with all other times, Asuka became keen of her emotional state during the sync test since that's what mattered most of all. It was a battle she had to win every time, and her enemy was her mother.

She also had no way of knowing where her sync ratio was at any given moment, except when her mother berated her. All she could do now at start was just try to relax and react to how displeased her mother was.

So, eyes closed, she settled into her usual pattern. Big breath in, big breath out. Clear her mind of thinking. She tried to concentrate on just this, but her mind wandered.

What did Shinji see in Rei? Why was he so interested in her, unless he found her attractive, too? Rei had been impenetrable to Asuka, but that didn't mean she wasn't more receptive to boys. She had heard of it before.

Thinking of Shinji added a dash of color to the slow swirl of her emotions. She wondered how he was doing. She wanted to share her tips with her, in order to help him throw her mother off his back. What kind of start up messages was he seeing in his Eva?

From there her mind went deeper. She had a place of her own, she could keep secrets from her mother. And with Shinji living practically next door, it would be simple to just let him come-

"You're doing marvelous Asuka, you're three points higher than third."

Her mother's purring knocked the balance Asuka had attained. She tried to push past it, but it was too late.

The last time she had a boy close to her it ended in disaster on that day long ago, when she was eleven.

There was a cute boy in her class, his name was Gunter. He was a pleasant kid who always had a joke or a movie quote ready that seemed always spot on with delivery. Asuka was impressed by his intelligence. The girls of her school judged him for his reedy appearance, but Asuka just enjoyed hearing him talk. This was long before Asuka fast-tracked through high school.

One day she had discovered a note in her desk. It was a drawing of a flower, claiming that its sender couldn't afford a real one, and hoped this would suffice. Gunter wanted to see her at lunch.

She was all butterflies and nervousness when she met with Gunter alone under that tree. They ate lunch and talked about their favorite books… back when Mother had allowed literature to be read for fun.

On the second day Gunter called her cute. By the end of the week, they held hands. It was an innocent, whirlwind grade school crush, Asuka would reflect later. But she was happy. And Gunter was fun to be around.

Asuka decided to ask mother, since her grades were good, if Gunter could come over after school one day. She absolutely forbade it, and demanded to know who this boy was and what business she had with him. Even then she knew it could mean something bad for Gunter, but she did what she was supposed to and told the truth.

The next day she had seen Gunter in class, but just before lunch he was summoned to the headmaster's office. Only when she went looking for him at lunch did she find out what had happened.

The ambulance was still in the parking lot. The boy's face was turned away from her but she recognized his favorite Godzilla t-shirt and strawberry red hair. She had listened to witnesses talking to the police, speaking of how strange men had removed Gunter from the office on civil authority. He was found on the grass later, beaten and bloodied.

Asuka was forced to return to class, but ever since that day, people avoided her. She never saw Gunter again, except possibly one other time in the month before they left Germany.

The Berlin airport. Her Mother was shrieking at the airport staff to resolve a priority transport flight or face consequences. The scene she was making drew everyone's attention. Asuka was trying to look at anything else.

That's when she saw a boy in a wheelchair across the terminal. He was wearing neutral colors and kept to himself, but the brown hair and eyes reminded her of Gunter. Asuka hadn't made eye contact, but when she looked back at the boy, he was gone. So was the party he was with.

Since then she had only imagined the horrors that her mother ordered done to Gunter to make him that way.

Just as she would do to Shinji.


Misato had heard Kyoko rasping under her breath long before she finally turned her attention back to the efforts of unit 02. What she saw astounded her.

The biometrics readout was turned off. Kyoko was bent over the microphone, uttering angry German into it. Misato could see Asuka's sync levels gradually dropping.

Misato was about to call this out when someone seized her arm. She looked down. Ritsuko was shaking her head as she looked up at the major and mouthed 'retaliation.' Misato lifted her arm to free her grip. She stared daggers at the occupied Kyoko as she tried to assess whether she'd win in a clash of authority against her. Not liking her chances, Misato backed down, but snorted angrily. She looked at Shinji's numbers.

At least he was doing fine, holding at 37%. Not stellar but, she remembered now, it was higher than Asuka and Rei's starting numbers.

And this boy wasn't trained.

Misato glanced at the clock. Ten minutes had passed since the test began. Then she asked loud enough for Kyoko to hear, "Do we have everything we need?"

Ritsuko responded, "Five more minutes for a baseline."


Asuka was trying to stabilize, but her mother's commentary wasn't helping.

"You're four points under, Asuka. If you don't bring up your numbers in the next five minutes, we'll be doing this again tonight."

The redhead tried to get a grip and ignore her mother. But behind that commentary was the wonder of what her mother would do to Shinji if she were to ever learn of Asuka's interest in him. The imagery was vivid.

Shinji, his face destroyed, body splayed out in front of the apartment building.

Shinji, his body at the bottom of his Evangelion from being pushed off the neck gantry.

Shinji, legs amputated from some bullshit medical reasoning concocted by her mother. In his eyes, to Asuka he was saying, 'you caused this.'

It was starting to make her sick. A hand went to her mouth as she tried to hold back tears and the rising bile in her throat.

Thinking if Shinji now was poisonous. Worse, she knew that by avoiding him, he would move off. He and Ayanami would get together. Hold hands. Share intimate moments in the locker rooms that Asuka would burst in on.

"Stop crying and focus, Second Children! You're in a synchronization test, not drama class. Get your act together now-!"

Suddenly Misato's voice broke through the comms. "We're done. End the test and pull them out, we have what we need."

Both comm windows closed.

Asuka locked out all comms, curled up in a ball, and started to weep. She needed to get this out before she could face anyone.


Kyoko whirled to face Misato. "The test for unit 02 is not complete yet."

Misato glared back at Kyoko with her arms crossed. "The data from this morning's sync test isn't enough?"

"As Director of Health and Pilot Maintenance," Kyoko said, "it is my job to determine what is sufficient. Asuka requires more time, her numbers are not where they should be."

Misato said, "Well, you're not going to be using an Evangelion to make that determination. Director, has it occurred to you how much it costs to bring an Evangelion to operational status, even in a static test like this?"

"No expense is too small to guarantee pilot performance at peak condition."

Misato put her hands on her hips. "Part of my responsibility, Director, is ensuring our Evangelions are operating at peak condition. I'm not going to stand by while you run our best unit unto the ground in a dick waving contest fueled by your insecurities."

Kyoko's stare was level. "You have no authority over how our units are maintained, Major. Let the experts handle it. All you need to do is kill the Angels."

"I can't kill Angels if you break our Evas or our pilots." Misato said. Her face lifted a degree. "If you persist with this, I'm going to flag Evangelion 02 for overrunning operational run time and recommend a stand-down order to command in order to recoup operating costs."

Kyoko laughed. "You think they're going to side with you? What do you or Akagi here know, truly, of the Evangelions capabilities and priorities? Besides, the Ikaris will side with me. All you'll be doing is inching your way closer to a pink slip and a firing squad for interfering with critical NERV operations."

Maya gasped, and many other technicians turned their heads to look at Kyoko. Misato's stare remained level at Kyoko. Finally, she said slowly, "We'll see. My order stands. Protest with the Ikaris if you want to, but this test is terminated on my order. Both Evangelions are to be on stand-down until further notice. Go through channels if you want them back."

Kyoko, still glaring, said, "You don't have final authority to make that decision."

Ritsuko stood. "But I do. Per technical recommendations, and as the third supervisor of these tests, I also declare them terminated."

Kyoko, seething, glared daggers at the two of them. "You will regret this." She said to Misato. To Ritsuko she added, "Both of you."

She turned and whirled from the console, storming out of the room like a rampaging freight train. Personnel got out of her way quickly in fear of their lives.

Both women watched the redhead depart. Misato said to her friend, "Thanks. I didn't want to drag you into it."

Ritsuko turned to look at Misato. "We're both going to witness Asuka suffer. The least we can do is try to end it sooner."

Misato looked through the glass at Asuka's Eva. "There has to be something more we can do for her."


Asuka was drained. She needed a few moments after crying in the plug to collect herself before she was ready to step out.

The sword was over her head now, though. Until her mother was appeased, Asuka would live under constant threat of punishment for failing to give her mother what she wanted. She could try to find a preemptive solution… perhaps asking the test team to run it again? No, that would get more NERV staff involved. Then they'd ask questions. Then her mother would find out and punish Asuka further for allowing others to know about her 'discipline'.

Asuka was bracing for an ambush all the way to the changing lockers, expecting her mother to pop out of any corner. This on her mind, she had totally forgotten that the lockers were unisex now until she looked up and saw Shinji half undressed. He turned around at the waist as his bare back and shoulders burned into Asuka's retinas.

"S-sorry!" The boy apologized, "i'll-!"

The girl fled the way she came, knocking herself against the wall outside as she tried to control her breathing. What was it with today? She had seen the contours of his torso earlier, now she saw his bare back. What's next? Streaking on the way out perhaps?

She came back to herself as Shinji was speaking on the way out of the lockers. "I'm sorry, I guess I thought you had changed already… Are you okay?"

"Fine! I'm fine." Asuka replied. She had her eyes closed until then. She sucked in a breath as she tried to push aside the thought of his bare back. "Don't apologize, I wasn't thinking. It didn't matter who was in there until you… joined up."

"Oh." Shinji replied. A modest hand went to his neck, "Well… I uh… I wanted to thank you for going with me earlier. It.. It's nice to know someone going through something with you, isn't it?"

Asuka blinked As the sentiment she so wanted to hear since arriving was served to her. And from the boy she liked, no less. "I… I wouldn't know."

Shinji gave Asuka a puzzled look. "But… isn't Ayanami a pilot too?"

"She is, but she doesn't give me the time of day." Asuka said. Hands on hips now she went on. "I can count the number of words she's said to me on one hand."

Shinji blinked and looked away, angry confusion on his face. It was idly intense enough that I piqued Asuka's curiosity. Finally he said, "I… I hoped you would know something about her. I don't understand."

When Shinji didn't elaborate, she asked, "Understand what?"

Shinji shook his head once, then looked at her. "My parents abandoned me for nearly a decade… but then I discover… she's been living with them this whole time? Who is she?"

Asuka could only stand there as she processed the scene before her. So… Shinji's interest in Ayanami… wasn't romantic? "I'm… I'm sorry I can't help you."

"It's fine." Shinji said angrily to the air. To Asuka he said, "it's not your problem." Turning to her properly, he said, "I'm sorry. I just don't understand this place. It's so confusing."

Asuka didn't have any words to that. Finally Shinji sucked in a breath and said, "Well, I guess I'll go home." He looked at her. "U-Um… I'd like to thank you for your help, earlier. Are…um… Are you eating at home, later? I-I could thank you by cooking something homemade. That way you wouldn't have to."

Asuka's heart buoyed in her chest at the notion, but it was quickly shot down by the arrow of fear. "I… I can't. I have too many things to do. As it is, I'll probably have to eat here before I go study."

"Oh." Shinji said, deflated. "Well… some other time perhaps?"

The little girl in Asuka insisted on being hopeful. Even if her mother was terrible now, perhaps, things could change. Maybe someday there will be light. Shinji was willing to put off eating with her for an indeterminate time in the future. It could be tomorrow, or next week. But he wanted it to happen.

"Yes," She said, "I would like that."

"Great!" His happiness floated in her. "I-I'll be seeing you, Asuka!"

"Take care, Shinji." She replied.

Shinji departed, headed for the main elevators that he must have taken to get down there. Asuka stepped inside the changing lockers as if she would get undressed…but… stopped. Slowly the depression sank in again as she knew in her heart she wouldn't be leaving this place. She just had to wait.

Slowly she left, walking the other way from the elevators and descending another level to the nearby break room. One coffee, one muffin later and she was eating as she sat on the benches. Her eyes looked at nothing as she moved the muffin to her mouth to chew, and the coffee to her lips to drink. Some of the technical staff saw her and regarded her with pity before moving on. They remembered what happened to the technicians who intervened on her behalf.

Finally like a distant trumpet, the announcement sounded. The Second Children was to report to testing annex 3C. Asuka disposed of the wrapper and the coffee and, with no emotion, walked to the designated location. It was the synchronization plug testing annex. There was no Evangelion, but the faux orange entry plugs would do. It wasn't as fine or detailed, but she would be made to perform.

Kyoko was there, surrounded by the German team. "Good." The director said to the immobile Asuka. "Your performance in the plug was disappointing. We will rectify this. Get in the plug and don't disappoint me this time, understand?"

"Yes, mother." Asuka the doll uttered, before going and doing what she was told to do.


Ritsuko poured herself some more orange juice. "Can we really call it a clandestine meeting if it's in your home, a known location, Misato?"

Katsuragi was seated across from her. The women were occupying the kitchen table of Misato's unit in the red brick apartment building on the east side of town. It was one of the only lit up units present, for nobody else really wanted to live right next to train tracks. But Misato did, it helped her keep focus.

Pen Pen stared at the cat food that had been dumped in his bowl. This happened only when Misato was stressed and didn't care to process the fish in the way he liked it. The penguin looked up at his owner, then returned to the fridge to try pestering her later.

Misato's arms were crossed. "We have to do something. From what you tell me, right now Asuka's in a spiral of misery. And now that dragon Kyoko is headed upstairs in authority."

Ritsuko pointed a finger. "Not necessarily. She may have seniority over me, but not you. I suggest you start looking up where the boundaries of your authority are, you're going to probably need to get those straightened out. Or at least some assurances from the Ikaris what you can or cannot do."

Misato sighed angrily and leaned back in her chair to rub her scalp with her fingernails. "This catty bullshit is not what I signed up for. Why can't I just shoot her?"

Ritsuko sipped her orange juice. "You could just not care, you know. Mind your own business." Ritsuko looked into her glass. "But I know you're not going to do that."

"She's hurting her kid. I can't stand that."

"She's not your kid, or your concern, really." Ritsuko said. "This is going to sound cruel, but you could just look at her like a part, if it makes it easier for everyone."

"Is that how you see them?"

"I'm just technical, that's how I'm supposed to see them. There are too many landmines if I get empathetic with our equipment. That's not to say I don't feel terrible about Asuka, I just don't know what we could realistically do."

Misato stared at the table. "Isn't there some law on the books about separating disagreeable parties, or something?"

"I would have to consult legal. But there's something you should know about this job; whatever the commander says, goes. He'd be able to find any legal authority to do whatever he wanted to. While this place was going up, NERV blew through almost every kind of legal restriction you could think of in order to cut corners and make this dream come true. Telling Asuka she needs to obey her mom is hardly an obstacle."

Misato stared into her own orange juice. She wanted to think, which is why this liquid was on the table. Beer could make the bad stuff go away, but after realizing the mother who loved her would never be able to have the chance to fix things, something changed. It mixed with the unfairness she was seeing about Asuka, turning Misato's normal indifference of people into anger about the situation. New enemies sprang up on this battlefield, ones that didn't come from another world.

"Even if I just shoot Kyoko in cold blood, there has to be something." Misato said.

Ritsuko looked thoughtful. "You may not be able to do anything now, but once an Angel appears, you might have some leeway. NERV hired you to fight Angels, and under that kind of authority, maybe an opportunity might open up."

Misato was quiet as her mind seized on that chance, and immediately began plotting a strategy around that. She gripped her glass tighter.


A/N: I apologize that so far we haven't had much action, and Asuka's just been made to suffer. However I needed to bring Shinji into the picture and establish where he's at. I've also caved and added Misato as a POV character because she's probably going to be in the best position to help Asuka at mid-teir authority. She'd also give a perspective on Kyoko at that level. I have some ideas for Ritsuko, so her cards are kept close to her for now.

Ramiel is around the corner.