You know the drill by now... harsh language, mentions of violence, etc. etc. etc.
(Sodapop's POV)
I woke up in Darry's arms, and I was confused. The last thing I remembered was our captors holding a gun to Steve's head, and I desperately wanted to save him, but I knew I couldn't. I even pleaded for them to kill me instead, knowing that it would mean I'd never see my brothers again. Somehow, though, I ended up in my dark bedroom with my older brother holding me and telling me I was safe.
It took me a minute to realize it was just another nightmare.
"You awake Soda?" Darry asked quietly.
"Yeah." My voice was hoarse. I felt horrible that I caused my brother to have another sleepless night. "Sorry."
He squeezed me gently. "Don't be sorry-" Darry suddenly stopped talking when the front door opened and shut.
"Who's that?" I asked. "It's the middle of the night."
"I don't know, I just saw Pone-" he trailed off. "Will you be alright if I go see what's going on?"
"Yeah, because I'm comin' with you," I said, not leaving any room for argument. I wasn't about to miss what was going on.
I sat up, and Darry stood up next to me, giving me a look that said he didn't like the idea of me tagging along. He must've read my mind because even though I knew he didn't approve, he didn't say anything. We walked into the living room, and I immediately noticed that Steve was gone. Right as I started panicking, thinking that he ran off or was doing something dumb, I saw two people sitting on the steps of the porch, talking.
"It's alright, Soda. They're still here," Darry said calmly, apparently noticing my panic. "Why don't you-"
"I'm fine, and I ain't leaving. I'm stayin' out here until they come back in." There was no way I was going to sleep so soon after my nightmare anyway, and I wanted to make sure everyone I cared about came back inside the house. I needed to know everyone was safe.
Darry conceded, but I knew he wasn't happy about it. He sat in his chair and I laid down on the couch. I didn't mean to eavesdrop on the conversation between Pony and Steve, but there was nothing else to listen to.
I was caught a little off guard by what I heard; not only did Pony get Steve to open up, but their conversation gave me a new perspective on my best friend. He was having a hard time with everything, especially sleeping, which I already knew, but I never heard him describe how he sees peoples or how our perspectives on our experiences in Vietnam were so different. Their conversation opened my eyes to how Steve was really feeling, not just how he told me he felt. Pony got him to start talking, and I intended to keep him talking.
When I heard the door open and shut, I sat up straight, causing my ribs to ache and shoulder to scream in pain, but I ignored the agony. Pony stood there, obviously surprised that Darry and I were there. I got to my feet and immediately wrapped my arms around my kid brother. "You're a good kid, Pony. A real good buddy." I meant every word I said, and I hoped he knew just how special and caring he is. Without another word, I went out the front door to talk with my best friend.
I sat next to Steve and slung my arm across his shoulders. He looked slightly surprised, but he didn't say anything. "Did my kid brother talk some sense into you, or do I gotta do it?"
He rolled his eyes, but didn't look at me. "I'm fine, Soda."
"Like hell you are… you're not getting' any more sleep than I am, and I know that leg of yours has been smartin'." There was a pause, and Steve didn't reply. "Just talk to me Steve. Out of all people, I'd understand."
He sighed. "How much did you hear already?" Steve asked.
I shrugged. "I think most of it." I felt myself start to get worked up as I recalled certain things Steve had said. "You didn't plan on coming back. You were lookin' out for me… you keep saying that I need help and support, but you don't think you need it." Then my voice got real quiet as I asked the thing that worried me the most, especially if I was right. "Or is it that you don't think you deserve it?"
One glance from Steve told me that I hit the nail on the head.
"We talked about this on the plane, Steve. You matter. If something happened to you, I'd lose my mind." I thought back to those days in the hospital that I thought he wouldn't make it. A shiver went down my spine. "And honestly, the fact that you think you don't need or deserve any love, help, or any type of support makes me want to scream."
Steve still didn't say anything. He just continued to stare at the ground.
I felt guilty for how Steve was feeling. "I'm sorry for makin' things harder for you with my problems, and for not makin' sure you're okay-"
"Hold on, you better not be apologizing for havin' nightmares and working through shit," Steve said, finally meeting my eyes. He seemed upset with me, but I ignored it.
"Well what do you expect?" Tears were trailing down my cheeks, but I didn't care. "My best friend is struggling every day from what we went through in Nam, and hearing me having nightmares is just makin' matters worse. And I haven't asked you enough about how you're doing. I'm sorry, Steve."
"Don't apologize Soda, we both have some stuff to work through," Steve said. Then he looked down again. "And you're not making things harder for me. We were effected by Vietnam differently, and we struggle in different ways."
"Then let us help, Steve. Please," I pleaded. "I can't let you fight this battle alone. We've both seen guys who struggled and couldn't handle it." I tried not to think about their names or their faces. "Please, Steve. Pony's right – you don't need to keep takin' care of everyone but yourself. You've got the gang again."
After a while, he looked back up at me. The rare sight of Steve crying was right there in front of me.
"We're going to figure this out. We're going to help each other and let the gang help us too," I stated. "Deal?"
Steve nodded. "Deal."
We sat on the porch for hours. At first, we talked about all sorts of things, like the things we see in our nightmares, or the horrible flashbacks we get from particular moments in Vietnam. Then we sat in silence as the sun rose.
"I see why Pony loves watchin' these so much," I said as I sat in awe of all the colors and the way the sunlight flooded everything in its path.
Steve nodded. "Sometimes the kid's right." I knew he meant more than just sunrises, and I smiled. We finally got through to him.
After the sun rose, Steve suddenly started laughing, and after noticing my confusion, he explained. "Another sleepless night, but somehow I feel better now than yesterday."
I patted him on the shoulder. "Let's get some breakfast."
I helped Steve get up from the step and grab his cane before we walked back into the house. When I opened the door, I noticed Darry was still sitting in his chair. I suddenly felt immense guilt for keeping him up, but I was comforted by the fact he'd always be there for me, even if it meant he wouldn't get any sleep.
Darry was reading the newspaper from the day before while he drank some coffee. When the door shut behind me and Steve, Darry looked up. He looked tired, but still calm and happy. "Good morning."
"Shoot Darry, I didn't mean to make you stay up all night," Steve said with a thick layer of guilt in his voice.
Darry shook his head. "Don't worry about it." He set the paper down and made a move to stand up. "I'll get breakfast-"
"I got it Dar," I said, beating him to it. I started walking into the kitchen before he could argue.
As I walked away, I heard Steve mutter to Darry. "What color do you think breakfast will be today?"
After breakfast, Steve was eager to go to the DX.
"What's the hurry?" Pony asked as he took the dishes from the table.
"We just wanna bug Two-Bit is all," I replied casually. It wasn't exactly a lie.
Pony stared at us with a strange look on his face. I had a feeling he knew Steve and I stayed out on the porch the entire night before, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he started washing the dishes.
Darry wasn't as easily convinced or distracted.
"You can just relax for the day you know, Darry said. I knew he meant we should try to get some sleep, but that wasn't happening.
"What's more relaxing than hanging out with our buddy, Two-Bit?" I asked sarcastically.
"Going to a carnival… jumping out of a moving train…" Pony started.
All of us laughed.
"I think they're getting' suspicious Steve," I said before I took a swig of Pepsi.
"How much longer you gonna keep this a secret?" Two-Bit asked,
Steve was leaning over the engine of the Thunderbird he was working on in the DX's garage. "As long as it takes me to finish it." Then he straightened, limped over to a chair next to me, and sat down with a sigh. "Should only be another week or two."
The first time we visited the DX after coming back from Vietnam, we talked with our boss. He was ecstatic that we were back in Tulsa. He told us that he'd love to have us back working for him, but he wanted to give us time to heal before working again. Steve was going to be the fulltime mechanic, but before he could start, our boss wanted to make sure he was up for the task. To do this, Steve had to fix a car that needed a lot of work, and our boss had one that fit the bill.
Apparently some rich guy brought a beaten-up Thunderbird to the DX to get fixed, but then he decided it would be easier to just buy a new car than fix his old one, so our boss bought the Thunderbird from him for a very low price. Our boss told Steve could prove himself ready to work by fixing up the Thunderbird and get it running again. The car was stored in the garage at the DX, and Steve could work on it whenever he wanted to, taking as long as he needed.
Once Steve made a lot of progress, our boss gave him another surprise; our boss said once Steve was done with the Thunderbird, he was allowed to keep it. Steve was shocked and excited, and then he came up with the idea of giving the car to Pony as a late 16th birthday present. It was a huge shock to me and Two-Bit, but Steve was nonchalant about his decision. He said that he already had a car that he loved and Pony needed a car, but I knew he was real excited to surprise my kid brother. I had a suspicion that Steve felt like Pony was his kid brother too, and he wanted to give Pony something that he wouldn't otherwise be able to have.
It was a huge surprise that we could barely keep from my brothers. We didn't tell anyone else about it, so only our boss, Two-Bit, Steve, and myself knew about the large surprise.
"Really? That's it? It's almost done?" I asked excitedly.
Steve took the Pepsi from my hand and drank some of it. "Yeah, I just gotta do a couple more things, but I'm almost done."
"You sure you don't wanna take more time?" Two-Bit asked cautiously. "I mean, you look like you haven't slept in weeks. Maybe you should take some time off."
Steve and I shared a look, and Steve gave me a small smirk. "Go ahead and tell him. He'll find out eventually anyway."
Two-Bit was confused, but his confusion quickly gave way to concern when I told him what happened the night before on the porch. When I finished explaining what happened, Two-Bit nodded quietly for a while before he spoke.
"Well, I'm glad Stevie here is finally figuring out we're here for him," Two-Bit said with a smile, then he gently punched Steve's arm. "Maybe now we can all get some shut-eye, right?"
Steve rolled his eyes, but didn't reply. I had a feeling Steve was glad nobody bugged him about having nightmares or feeling certain ways. Instead, everyone just wanted to support him and help him in any way possible. The small grin forming on his face confirmed my suspicions.
"Don't you have to go back to work, Two-Bit?" I asked.
He shrugged. "I got a couple more minutes of my break. I'm just here to lend a hand if Steve needs it."
Steve laughed. "I don't need help, Two-Bit. I'll be done with this soon enough. You just keep the boss happy inside the store, and I'll keep doin' my job out here."
Two-Bit nodded, and then after looking at the car again, he smiled. "Ponykid's gonna lose his mind when he sees this!"
