Ashley ran straight out of her father's office and down the now empty school hallways as her heart continued to race. Her palms felt like literal blocks of ice and they were already starting to hurt, the weight of them was literally dragging her wrists behind her - but she didn't care. She had to go somewhere, anywhere without prying eyes to calm down before it got too intense and the 'bad things' started to happen.
Again.
Suddenly, she felt someone yank her back from the direction she was speed walking in. It was Scott, in all his glory, frowning at his friend's obvious nerves and jumpy disposition. "Ash, how did it go?" he asked lowly. He was trying not to pry too much as always, but he was also well aware that the panic she was in was growing larger by the second.
"How did it go?" Ashley scoffed as her eyes started to fill with tears, "Scott, even my own father thinks I'm about to kill everyone in the school tomorrow. What's the point? What the hell is the POINT?" She was starting to rant and it was just getting louder, so Scott dragged her to the closest place of seclusion - which happened to be the quiet courtyard lined with roses and daisies - Ashley's favourite part of the school. Scott sat her down on one of the cool stone benches before sitting beside her with a sigh. There were only a handful of students milling about, and hardly any of them were paying attention.
Scott waited a few peaceful moments before turning to her again.
"Ash, do you think you'll fail, or are you upset that they think you'll fail?" he asked her curiously. Ashley shrugged and carefully avoided his eye…well, visor…contact.
"I don't know, a bit of both I guess?" she mumbled. Scott smirked at her words and put an arm round her shoulders, bringing her in for a sweet side hug. Ashley held her breath and tried to regulate her heartbeat from going nuts against his chest. Given that this was the guy she had crushed on for almost three years, being this close to him would be the stuff of dreams if she wasn't so stressed.
"I think you'll do great, Ash," he assured her with a small hum. Ashley didn't say anything in response - being in his arms was more than enough comfort for now. And ironically, despite the fact that she was internally adoring that they were finally having a conversation about something other than Jean - Ashley still felt like she had to say those oh-so crucial words.
"Thanks for the confidence. So….how have you been? You know, since…" she trailed off, lifting her head to peer at Scott at an angle. He released a heavy sigh of remembrance.
"Since what, Jean? I mean, the whole situation it still sucks ass but…I don't really know what else to do about it, aside from try and move on," he muttered back. "I don't know if I ever will, though." At that point, Ashley couldn't help but let out an accidental giggle, covering her mouth with her hand once she it slipped out. Scott was clearly taken aback, snapping his arm back from around her and frowning down at her instead. "Uh…wanna share the joke, Ash?" he asked her, the hurt in his voice edging on visible.
"I didn't mean anything by it, Scott!" Ashley calmed him down playfully. "It just became crystal clear to me that I have to let you go. I can't crush on someone who's still hellbent on loving a dead woman."
Scott looked like he had just been slapped across the face. Her bluntness was astounding sometimes, although she didn't always mean for it to be.
"Wow, you really don't have a heart!" he grumbled, staring straight ahead of him as a form of silent protest.
"Oh give it a rest, Scott - it's true! It feels like you've been mourning her since I got here, dude," Ashley reminded him, unfazed by his words.
"I mean, you'd do the same if you- wait, say what you said again?" Scott suddenly spluttered, looking back at her. Ashley knew exactly what he had cottoned on to, but decided to tease him just a little more.
"You've been mourning her since-"
"Before that!"
"'Scott, it's true'?" she fluttered her long eyelashes ever so innocently. Scott immediately cottoned onto the fact that she was just riling him up and ran his tongue over his bottom lip, deep in thought.
"You've crushed on me? Ash, there's like, a solid fifteen year age difference between the two of us, you know that right?" he eventually told her with a serious look on his face.
"I'm turning 25, not 15, Scott. I know you think of me as a student too, but I'm not," Ashley muttered in irritation, turning her head away from him again moodily.
"I don't think of you as a student, Ash," Scott began tiredly - but Ashley didn't want to hear it. She was extremely tired of this narrative now, and with her nerves building up for the exam tomorrow as it was, an unnecessary argument was the very last thing she needed.
"Save it, Summers. I'm going to call my mum, I'll see you in the exam hall tomorrow," she forced him a stiff smile before leaping to her feet and speed walking straight out of the courtyard. Scott let out a groan as he briefly caught how flushed her cheeks were.
"Ash, come back!" he called out to her in a weak attempt to diffuse the situation.
And she certainly heard him - but she just kept walking.
…
That evening, Ashley sat cross legged on her bed, dressed in her big fluffy dressing gown and slippers. She had made herself a hot lemon and ginger tea to ease her ever-growing nerves, and her freshly washed deep auburn locks were now wrapped up in a soft towel. She dialled her mother's number on the floating video call screen in front of her, desperately hoping she'd answer. To both Ashley's surprise and relief, her mother Mella's kind face appeared on the screen within seconds. "Ashley! My darling ladybug!" she beamed, those dark brown eyes of hers twinkling at the sight of her beautiful eldest daughter.
"Hey Mum," Ashley sniffed back, giving her a short smile. "How are you doing?"
"Ah I'm just peachy thank you, sweetheart. I've just finished cooking for the week," Mella beamed with pride. Ashley cooed at how excited she looked - it had always been the little things that made her mother's life more enjoyable since the divorce.
"Oooh! What did ya make?" Ashley asked before taking another sip of her tea.
"This week, I made a beef stew and a good but rather spicy bolognese…oh, I fried a few banana and cinnamon fritters as well," Mella ticked each dish off her fingers, "…then I tended to the horses, you know it's breeding season over here and for once the English weather isn't terrible…" Mella rambled on and on but Ashley wasn't overly bothered - just hearing her tinkering voice was what she needed. But Mella knew that, much like herself, her oldest daughter was a chatterbox; therefore her silence was not normal. The slow realisation then resulted in her stopping dead in her tracks. "What's wrong, sweetheart? You seem…rather glum?" Mella suddenly asked with a few worried blinks.
"Oh…nothing major, Mum. It's just…those stupid exams tomorrow. I'm stupidly nervous," Ashley shuddered, running her hands over her face. Her mother was a big worrier, much like herself at times.
"Nervous? You? But you've always been so confident in your abilities, what's there to be nervous about now?" Mella rightfully pointed out.
"Oh, you know…the little fact that I could potentially kill all my classmates might have something to do with it?" Ashley suggested weakly. Mella's eyes grew wide and she pushed her light brown curls away from her face so that she could see her daughter properly. Her freckled nose crinkled up in surprise and she shifted her glasses a little higher.
"You still think you can spiral, even after they've made you to take lessons to control it? Have you spoken to your father about those worries?" she frowned in concern.
"Spoken to him?" Ashley scoffed, putting her mug back down on her bedside table. "Mum, he was the one to give me that worry in the first place! I felt absolutely fine with myself before he called me in his office to remind me that I was the biggest threat in the sch-"
"He said what?!" Mella interrupted her with a gasp. Ashley let out a regretful groan and covered her face with her hands again.
"Not in an insulting way Mum, so please don't freak out on him again-"
"Ashley, the man calling his own daughter a threat is insulting because he wouldn't do that to one of his regular mutant students. You're not a threat, do you hear me?" Mella growled sternly, that staple sweet kindness on her face completely disappearing. "I cannot for the life of me understand how one day he's calling mutants gifted, but on the next, he's condemning them to blasted hell-"
"Mum!" Ashley clicked her fingers loudly to get her mother's attention again. Mella fell silent. "Mum it's fine, he's always been quite supportive of me so I really don't think he meant it in that way."
"Ashley it doesn't matter what his intentions were by saying something so reckless - he shouldn't have said it in the first place! I didn't send you away in his care for you to feel even more weary of yourself than you already felt before," Mella spoke over her, still enraged. "You aren't something to be feared, but embraced. And if Charles can't provide that, then there are other agencies out there that will." Ashley nibbled down on her plump lips in uncertainty, extremely confused as to what her mother was now rambling on about. But Mella knew exactly who she had to call.
The X Men may not be for Ashley, but she knew exactly who would be.
…
Lining up for the exams the next day was the worst.
Ashley really didn't want to do this anymore - were the X Men even worth it at this point? If she just quit, she could mind her business and move on with her life, couldn't she? Ever since the last conversation with her father, she suddenly felt like the whole world was counting on her not to lose control and annihilate the school.
Her heart was beating slowly, deliberately, thumping against her chest. All the other students looked excited, whispering amongst themselves as they lined up against the grey stone wall that lead into the examination hall. This was basically a narrow room with human shaped targets lined up against the wall, with ventilators in the ceiling in case of an emergency and a huge two way mirror for the examiners to peer through. The room itself was adequately sized for complete chaos to take place without any real problems, but that didn't make Ashley any less nervous. Some of the students standing nearby even smiled at her, but she didn't want to smile back - not until this whole day was well and truly over.
She glanced behind her and saw the likes of Scott and Storm standing with other mentors, chatting amongst themselves.
That's what made Ashley feel so stupid.
Technically she was meant to be there too, part of that circle. But not before she passed this stupid test with people quite a few years younger than her. "The examinations will begin now," Professor Wade announced clearly, leading all the students to turn their noisy conversations into a quiet hush. Ashley chewed on her plump bottom lip anxiously as she watched the professors and 'witnesses' walk into the room that they were spectating from. Then the giant speakers turned on.
"Ashley Darmer," the voice called out.
Brilliant - she was first.
The entire line of students turned to face her, noticing that she was already blushing a ferocious shade of red. She took a few short breaths in and out before mustering up the courage to walk in and stand directly in the middle of the long examination room, facing the two way mirror. The large doors banged shut behind her which made her feel even worse. She was enclosed, trapped with nothing but her own mutation and a smallest slither of hope. So there she stood awkwardly, awaiting further instructions.
"Name?" Professor Wade suddenly asked into the scratchy sounding microphone.
"Ashley Darmer," she answered quickly, praying that her voice didn't start to shake.
"Age?" Ashley bit back the disrespectful response she had lined up for him for asking her publicly. She was praying they'd leave that out to avoid any further embarrassment but…there she was.
Embarrassed.
"Twenty-four," she sighed lowly.
"Mutation?"
"P-power over the elements - yet to be fully dissected," Ashley answered slightly shakily. Oh, how she wished for her mutation to be absolutely anything else but that.
"Thank you. Please demonstrate your mutation."
The atmosphere had a disturbing silence to it as Ashley took a deep breath in and shut her eyes. She concentrated as hard as she could, before opening her palm and seeing a small flame ignite by itself.
That was only step one.
Scott and Storm were tense as they prayed that she'd keep her cool. Ashley gulped and gently bounced the flame into the air, keeping it levitating whilst drawing water from the atmosphere into her fingertips, watching it curl into a ball and letting it hover in the air next to the fireball. But her muscles were already starting to weaken under the strain. This was entirely too difficult already - it was like her powers weren't meant to be controlled. They weren't even used to being slightly regulated, no matter how many lessons and lectures she had received from both her father and Professor Wade.
Nothing was working. Nothing ever did.
Ashley immediately started to felt her veins tug and pull, and her muscles were starting to ache a lot earlier than expected but she persisted regardless. But before she could refocus all her energy to force a rock to burst through her palms - she started to see silver. It started off as a gentle haze over her vision, then it slowly grew a little more prominent. Professor X leaned forward to get a closer look and noticed her eyes starting to lose focus. He knew what that meant.
"Stop!" he told the examiners abruptly, causing them to turn to him in surprise.
"Why, Charles?" one of them frowned. Clearly they couldn't see anything wrong.
"Professor you can't stop her now! She'll fail!" Scott hissed as soon as Charles' words left his mouth.
"But if I don't stop her she'll fail anyway and we all die!" Professor X reminded him sharply. "Stop the examination!"
"Can't you go into her head and assist her?" Storm gave him a desperate whisper. "If Ashley fails this she'll be devastated, you know that!"
"I understand, but the safety of these students is more important-"
"Is that coming from you or your 'good conscience'?" Scott snapped in irritation. But by that point, it was too late. Ashley had created a number of mini tornados which were now tossing and turning her all over the place. She was no longer in control, but the elements she'd produced were going haywire, rocks now breaking through the ceiling and raining down above her, water gushing through newly formed cracks in the ground and fireballs flying as little hot pellets from her skin, bouncing against the walls. One even hit the window and the students screamed and ducked in fear, despite the strength of the glass preventing it from coming through.
"STOP THE EXAMINATION!" Professor X shouted with a the most authority he could muster.
"Sedate her," one of the examiners finally muttered to his peer. Scott swore under his breath and kicked the wall closest to him whilst Storm squeezed her eyes shut. The medics opened the door in their protective gear and fired a needle or six from their small glass sedation pistols and straight into Ashley's body.
Immediately, the chaos stopped and Ashley went limp, dropping to the floor.
"Ash!"
…
fun fact: when i first thought of this character i was 13/14…so almost ten years ago. only now am i seeing how much of an obvious 'avatar: tla' stan i was - but i promise she's not a direct lift and was NOT done on purpose (…YIKES) x
