Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls
AN: I'm just going to drop this bomb and walk away slowly...I am here...I am trying... I am very anxious about posting this because I don't want to have dissappointed anyone. I hope that you enjoy, and read, and review.
Chapter Nine
Rory's hand was shaking as she held the pregnancy test in her hand. She was four days late and that seemed like an eternity. She felt fine. Nothing felt particularly different about her, but maybe what was different is that she felt hope for the first time in a while. Logan was still asleep. She didn't want to wake him up so she had snuck downstairs and put on a pot of coffee and snuck off to the powder room on the main level where she unpackaged the pregnancy test and stared at it for more moments than she wanted to count.
Of course this wasn't the first stick she had peed on since they had been trying, and there was a small voice in the back of her head telling her that it probably wouldn't be the last either, but she tried to push that out of her mind. She grabbed the disposable plastic cup that she had brought with her and sat down, jamming the cup between her legs until she was sure she had enough of a sample to use and then she followed the instructions, dipping the test and saturating it and then waiting. She disposed of her sample and washed her hands, returned to the kitchen and poured her coffee, all while counting the minutes in her head until she could go and see what it said.
She remembered the test she had bought when she had been with Jess. The cheapest one she could find and she wondered if she was ever ass smart as she had thought as she tried to decipher what was a positive pregnancy test and what was not. She had looked at the instructions more than once to confirm what set of lines meant a baby and which set meant she could release the breath she had been holding since the first day her period hadn't come. This time though she was older, her means were different and she wasn't going to spend any time staring at lines and determining just how faint one might've been. So she had a digital test and she waited. One sip of coffee then two and then she put it down having decided that enough was enough and she wasn't any less anxious in the kitchen than she would be simply staring at that screen and willing the results to come.
And then suddenly, as if she blinked her eyes there was an answer. There was a response on that Godforsaken test. She paused an inhaled before taking the test and tucking it back in it's little plastic baggy and then back in the cardboard box. She walked it immediately to the garage and dumped it in the oversized grey garbage bin. The last thing she needed was anyone else having to touch something that she had literally dipped in pee. She closed the door quietly and went back into the kitchen to finish her coffee. She instantly felt drained, and she supposed (or at least she had read), that fatigue, mental and physical was normal for women who were trying to conceive. It was also normal for women who were pregnant, which she thought was unfair because at least for the pregnant women, they were getting something out of the fatigue. Trying to conceive, it was just emotionally exhausting.
The first child to move upstairs was Jack. She could always tell based on the sound of the footsteps. Slow, sluggish steps meant Olivia who was apparently on the verge of turning 16 based on her attitude had gotten out of bed, and the quick pitter patter of excited feet was always Jack up and ready to start his day. "Jack Jack," Rory called, "is that you babe?"
"Mama, I hungry," Jack was making his way slowly down the stairs, "can I have a yogurt freeze?" He asked, referring to the tubes of yogurt that she bought and immediately shoved in the freezer in hopes of convincing at least one of the children that they were a treat of some sort.
"No baby, you can't have too many of those," she responded as he made his way into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around her thighs. "Good morning my sweet boy."
"Now I have a yogurt freezie?"
Rory let out a laugh and returned to her coffee, "cheerios with blueberries, or eggs?"
"With bacon?"
"Just eggs."
"Waffles from the freezer?"
"Fine," Rory agreed. "Was your sister awake?"
Jack nodded his head as he went to the drawer with the toaster and helped pull it out before moving to the freezer and grabbing the box of Mickey Mouse shaped Eggo waffles. Moments like this she really wished she was a bit closer with her mother. She knew that Lorelai had come to like the kids, but she didn't really know them, and she knew that Lorelai would love them both, but she was sure that rambunctious, sweet, sugar addicted Jack would hold the keys to Lorelai Gilmore's heart. "She's reading," Jack explained.
Rory smiled. The bookworm. "Well you watch the toaster," she told him, "do not touch it, it can hurt you."
"S'hot."
"Yes honey, it gets hot," Rory nodded, "I'll be right back." She moved quickly up the stairs and knocked on Olivia's door, surprised when the little girl called her in, "morning kiddo."
"G'morning Mom," Olivia mumbled as she sat cross legged on her bed with a book in her lap.
"I'm making waffles, you want some?" Rory tried to ignore the way her heart swelled when Olivia slipped up and called her mom. It was happening more and more and she would be lying if she said she didn't like the idea of Olivia feeling comfortable with that. But she wasn't going to push. She had long since promised herself that the last thing she would do is try to force a relationship beyond what the kids were comfortable. She remembered how uncomfortable she had been when her father had gotten his then girlfriend pregnant and Sherri had felt the need to really try to involve herself in a then teenaged girls life. Suffice to say it had been awkward, and Rory knew that even if her father and Sherri had worked out, Rory never would've been close to a woman who tried to force herself on her.
"Is Dad up?" Rory shook her head and Olivia paused for a moment, focusing her attention once more on the book in her lap. "Can I have chocolate milk?"
"One cup and you have to be nice to your brother."
"Deal."
"Deal." Rory laughed when Olivia's eyes went straight back to her book. "Come down when you're done that page, ok?" She knew by the time she got to the kitchen that Jack would've pulled something over to be able to stand up and get a better view of the toaster in action. This time he had climbed up on the stool at the island and then onto the island itself and perched himself on the counter top where he could see across into the toaster and watch as the magic of toasted waffles occurred. "You supervising?"
"They're all done. Livie coming?"
"She's just finishing her page," Rory nodded as she popped another two waffles in the toaster. "You're not gonna try to eat up here, are you?" She smirked as Jack nodded his head with a grin that made him look just like his father and a sweet 'uh huh' from his lips. "You cannot put your stinky toes on the counter, that is gross!"
"They aren't stinky," Jack countered with a gleeful laugh as Olivia joined them and sat on one of the stools while giving her brother a glare that was halfway between confused and annoyed. "Smell my little toe-ies."
"I am not smelling those stinky toes!" Rory played along as she went to the fridge to grab the chocolate milk and 2 cups because she knew there was no way Jack wouldn't want one too.
"Smell my stinky toes," Jack giggled as he kicked his feet around while Rory poured the chocolate milk. She gave Olivia hers first and then Jack happily took his plastic cup with two hands and enjoyed a long sip, seemingly putting his stinky toes to rest for a moment.
"Eat your waffles," Rory retorted as she presented the kids with their plates and cutlery, pointedly putting Jack's in front of the chair he needed to be sitting in. "Liv you want Nutella or syrup."
"Syrup please," Olivia smiled as she looked at the plate. "Is there whipped cream too?"
"Me too syrup!"
"I'll look," Rory was in the fridge grabbing the syrup and then pulling out a can of whipped cream that she couldn't recall an original use for. Probably something Logan had bought on one of the rare occasions where he went grocery shopping, Lord knew that Olivia would be able to talk him into buying it. "I wonder who convinced Daddy to buy this?" Rory teased as she handed Olivia the syrup and then ejected a generous portion of the canned goodness on each of their plates.
"I think Tia bought it," Olivia giggled.
"Now that I can believe," Rory hadn't considered that it might've been Victoria but it certainly wasn't surprising.
"What are we doing today?" Olivia asked, "can we go shopping for books?"
"Well, after Dad wakes up, I thought we could hang out for a bit," Rory considered their Saturday morning options. They needed to do some stuff around the house, but the night before had been hard. Saying goodbye to Colin and Steph had been hard and she wanted to let that emotional weight sink in. "But I bet we can go to the library in the afternoon? Maybe take Mac to the beach?"
"Where's Mac Mac?" Jack asked, how mouth stuffed full of breakfast.
"He's in bed with Daddy."
"I want Mac."
"So finish your breakfast and we can go play with Mac," Olivia rolled her eyes.
"I'm going to go get dressed. Jack, I'll leave your clothes out for you to change into when you're done, ok?" Jack nodded his head in response, "Olivia do you need me to pick something out for you?" Of course Rory knew that the last thing Olivia needed was for someone to pick out clothing for her, but she felt compelled to offer.
"Are my pink pants clean?"
Rory nodded, "did them yesterday. I think they're just in the laundry room. I'll put them on your bed."
"Thanks Mom," Olivia smiled. This time it wasn't a slip and Rory smiled back at Olivia and held her gaze for a moment.
"Yeah, thanks Mom," Jack giggled.
Rory took a few steps out of the kitchen and watched them for a moment. She knew with surety that they got along best when they weren't with either parent. Something about being with Rory and Logan meant that both of the kids felt the need to fight about anything and everything. Jack enjoyed ticking Olivia off, and Olivia reacted to everything that her brother did, no matter how unintentional it might've been. So she watched from a distance and twisted her wedding rings around her fingers for a moment before going upstairs. First she grabbed the requested pants that Olivia had been looking for and then she dug through the closet organizer to find the white t-shirt she was looking for. Rory quickly made the bed and left Olivia's book on the bedside table for easy access. She noted that Olivia had opened the blinds herself and Rory took a moment to study the ocean views…she would never tire of them. She couldn't imagine waking up to any other view. Next she made her way to Jack's room where she had to pick up a trail of stuffed animals and then a small pile of laundry needed to be placed in the hamper. Jack was still, thankfully, much easier to dress than his sister. He would wear what was left out for him and leave it at that. So she grabbed a pair of pull on black cotton pants and a white tee, she placed a pair of underwear on top as a reminder to the boy who would do almost anything to be naked, and then she went to crawl back into bed with her husband.
By the time she was under the covers and pressing a kiss to Logan's cheek, she could hear the kids in their rooms. She hoped they would just get dressed and not destroy things in the process but Rory knew that was very much out of her control, "kids are coming," she whispered in Logan's ear.
"Early," Logan groaned as he stretched out in the bed. "Hey," he smiled and kissed Rory. "You been up long?"
She shook her head and smiled, "got them breakfast, they're getting dressed…"
"You got a coffee at least?" Logan smirked, he knew that she would most definitely need a coffee to start her day so early with them. "Why don't we go to the little place you like by the place you lived with Paris? Grab a coffee, some breakfast…"
"Mmmmm," Rory kissed him, "how about," another kiss, "we wait," one more kiss, "and see."
"Well with an offer like that," Logan buried his head into her neck and inhaled her scent. "You have fun last night? You and Steph were chatting for a bit."
Rory laughed and Logan looked up at her with a small pout. "We were saying how we didn't want to test where Col's loyalty lies. Not sure where either of us would fall in the pecking order, but we agreed that the kids would come before any of us."
"That is very true," Logan's eyes went to the door as he heard the sounds of two giggling children coming to the door. Jack was shouting something about a race and Olivia was telling him it wasn't fair because his room was closer to Logan and Rorys. "Relax guys," Logan shouted as they came shoulder to shoulder into the space.
Rory watched. She watched as Jack came at them from the foot of the bed and Olivia went to Logan's side and began climbing up. "Be gentle," she warned Jack who had a habit of jumping on kneecaps and other extremities.
"Daddy, I got myself dressed!" Jack told him proudly.
"All by yourself?" Logan responded with an equal level of enthusiasm. "Let's see it bud!" Jack stuck his stomach out so Logan could read and Rory watched as his eyes danced between his two children and then back on his wife, the grin growing by the second. "Really?" He asked her, his voice low and hopeful.
"Really," she nodded as Olivia snuggled up against her. "How do you feel about 3?"
