Lights brighter than the sun pierced his vision. He wished the lights were the path to Hell—where he deserved to be. Although, the stage lights could only be as bright as the ones in Heaven—where all of his fellow tributes should be. He didn't want to be the one strutting onto the stage, grinning as if he had won the lottery. Which, in a way, he had won the lottery. He just hadn't done it the way it should be done.

The live audience cheered and clapped as Percy took his seat. His winning smile adorned his face, but his eyes were as dead as the other tributes. Before, they glowed a bright green, swirling like the sea back from his home in District 4. Now, they were as dark as the deep sea. They held a weight that only other victors would relate to.

Percy's fingers trembled on the edges of his seat. His smile flattered, but the crowd didn't seem to catch it. He didn't want to be here. He didn't deserve to be here. He was supposed to be dead, like the twenty-three other teens. Percy should've tried harder in the games. Picking up fights, trying new foods, adventuring, and more. He could've found ways to make his death seem like an accident.

So many of those teens had bright futures ahead of them. Annabeth was wicked smart; she wouldn't be a disappointment to her family name if he had protected her as he promised. A leader Jason was. He would have done a phenomenal job at being mayor, and the people of five surely would've elected him too. Piper Mclean had such a voice; she could preach women's rights. The whole country could have been persuaded by her words.

But no. Percy screwed it all up.

"Perseus!" Caesar Flickerman cheered. "How great is it to be alive?"

Percy rolled his eyes at Caesar. "It's Percy. How many times must I tell you?"

His cool exterior worked too well. Percy could tell everybody was consumed by the aura of the victory. They are watching the kid who got other kids killed, but came out victorious. Percy was their live entertainment.

They didn't know the Hell he had been through. They didn't know what it was like to watch your friends die. Percy's dreams got plagued with nightmares of Annabeth's screams. His ADHD only got worse with the passing days. He was jumpy and quiet, something he wasn't before the arena. The people of the Capital didn't know how much shit they went through.

Percy saw his friends' bloodied bodies in his eyes every time they closed. His heart beat on, but only for the sole purpose of keeping him alive. It was shattered into too many pieces to fix. He didn't feel anymore because of his broken heart. Everything was dull anymore. He didn't see hope or light in the world. The rainbow of dyed hair and patterned clothes didn't catch his attention as much as did the first time. Everything was a shade darker; even the crowd's bizarre clothing choices.

"Say no more!"

The boy swallowed thickly.

Caesar raised a curious eyebrow at Percy. "So tell us, Percy. How did you make it out of the arena alive?"

Percy chuckled. He wanted to scream and shout that he didn't make it out. His soul got ripped apart from the arena. His mind and strive and will to live got lost. He should be dead. Someone else should be sitting in his chair. "A true magician never reveals his secrets."

"It couldn't have been magic! Your training score was a high ten!" Caesar leaned close to Percy. "Just between the two of us, but I know you have some tricks up your sleeve."

The thing was, it wasn't like no one else could hear him. The two of them had microphones on, so it didn't matter that Caesar was whispering anyway. The whole crowd could hear him. They thought it was a hoot because they all cackled, taking the joke as something funnier than reality.

Percy tapped his fingers on the edges of his seat. His eyes gazed around the room. He almost started to bounce his leg, but he clenched his muscles to keep that from happening. Sweat built up, and his ears began to burn. A sharp shiver danced down his spine, and he didn't know what to do. His throat clogged up, and his heart sped up. Percy's whole body lit on fire. It wasn't only the stage lights glowing over him, but the anger inside his body.

What if Caesar asked him about Annabeth? How could Percy respond to a question like that? Did Dominic prepare him for this? Why did he have to win?

Not only did he make three friends, but any of the other tributes. He had learned quite a bit about each of them. He couldn't stand killing them, so he didn't. He was just lucky enough to not get hunted, but the Capital or tributes.

"Stay casual. Make allies and pretend to care for them. Hunt or be hunted." The words tasted like bile inside his mouth. "I had the face and features of a career. When others found out I was "different", I attacked."

"Your acting was true magic, Percy. How do you do it?"

Percy scoffed. "Easy manipulation. I had to survive. The three others didn't understand that."

He wanted to throw himself inside the pit of Hell. Percy wanted to throw himself off the stage. He wished to drown in the depths of the ocean. After dishonoring his lost friends, he down-talked them. Lying to appease the crowd was something Percy wished he didn't have to do. He didn't want to be seen so careless and cocky in front of all of Panem. Anyone with cleansed eyes could see he was lying.

Oh, how he wanted to praise his friends.

Jason and Piper pinned over each other. They chat with each other from the beginning-here, there, and everywhere. They laughed and teased each other. Jason was a great leader, and for that reason, he got killed. Piper loved him, but couldn't stop because he did. She and Annabeth snuck off to the Cornucopia for a feast. Only Annabeth came back.

Annabeth Chase was something else. Percy hadn't seen anything in her at first, but he soon shined a light above her head. She was incredibly smart and ambitious. She kept up with Percy's sarcasm, and something beat him to it. Annabeth strategized the best plans, getting them safely out of many situations. He remembered her gray eyes. Grey eyes that weren't a shade of blue or green, but pure gray.

Caesar nodded in understanding. "For how intelligent she was, I'm surprised Miss Chase didn't realize."

Percy's head snapped to Caesar. He gripped the edge of his chair so hard his knuckles turned white. Gone was any fear of the questions asked, but now replaced by anger and only anger. No other emotions flickered to life inside his head.

How dare he say something so low about Annabeth? Did Caesar not see past his facade? Was Percy's love for the girl in question not obvious?

He saw her death in his head like it was yesterday and not nearly a week ago. He recalled her scream when he woke up alone for a second time. He was worried sick but knew why Annabeth had left. There was only so much time left in the games. They weren't going to be the last two alive.

Hearing her scream, pierced his soul. He called her name and ran towards her as fast as he could. He arrived just in time to see her eyes right before they closed. She had died in his arms. He hadn't been there to protect her. He didn't know who did it but he wanted revenge.

No, he didn't want revenge on who killed his love. He wanted to get revenge on himself. He hadn't woken up when Piper and Annabeth had snuck out to the feast. He hadn't been there to aid Annabeth and Piper. He had been fast asleep. Percy didn't take the leadership position from Jason when he knew he could. His friend ended up getting electrocuted by a tripwire set up by the small boy from District 2.

Why wasn't Percy in the front? How didn't he wake up from Annabeth and Piper's rustling? Did he have to let Annabeth run out of his grip so easily? How come he had to win? Percy didn't deserve to win, let alone down-talk his friends that he swore to honor.

"I'm surprised she didn't notice as well."

Percy was shocked that they didn't see through his mask. He was only a victor to them. He wasn't a victim, despite being just as dead as the others.

"And that, ladies and gentlemen, is Perseus Jackson of District 4! Winner of the 49th Hunger Games!"


I wrote this a while back for a comp. on Insta and I decided to bring it here. I hope you enjoyed, and if you want more percabeth, check out my page:) Feel free to leave a review!