AN: Originally started during pride month before I got really sick and was hospitalized, this little short story is about Rika being secretly in love with Asuna and being heartbroken about being just a friend where she's fed up with it all. Before Argo has her way with words to the frustrated engineer and gives her the courage to actually say something about her feelings.

Full stand alone, 5 parts total.


Just Want to Let Go


Trying to describe the strength of Rika's anger of having her best friend and roommate, sorry Shino, in her arms, crying was impossible.

Stupid fucking guys and their tendencies to play with a girl's heart.

All she could do was sit there with her on the floor of the apartment and gather her into her arms so she could hold her close. To tuck Asuna's head into her neck and cradle her head there while she rubbed her back with gentle motions, not wanting her calloused fingers to press too hard into the skin the partially backless beautiful dress she was wearing revealed, in fear of hurting her. Because the last thing she wanted to have happen while she tried to comfort her, was to accidentally hurt her with her fingers hardened from years of metal working and glass sculpting against her soft skin.

There wasn't anything else she could do but let her cry and comfort her with soft words telling her to let it all out and that she was going to be okay. Even though she knew it would take a while for the pain to heal, even if she didn't want it to take that long.

After all, no matter how much Rika wanted to, she didn't have the cure to heartbreak and pain. Cause if she did, she would've given it to Asuna years ago and would've stopped being a coward and told her that she could love and cherish her so much better than the ones that coaxed her vulnerable and stabbed her when she wasn't looking. Rather than sit in fear of her feelings being revealed destroying the bond between her and Asuna.

The sound of soft footsteps signaled the third occupant of the apartment, namely the third member of their little best friend trio family, Shino Asada.

Shino, Rika, and Asuna, that was how it had been since back in the early days in college, after Rika had nearly collided headfirst into the strawberry blonde in her rush to make it to her childhood friend Shino's tour of the campus. Since then it had been the three of them, even after Rika and Asuna had graduated and the youngest of the three was finishing up her degree this year. Four years, four years of the three of them together, braving the world without any intentions to split up, and…

Three long years of silently being head over heels for the strawberry blonde who she was only a best friend to and as far as she knew, was completely straight unlike her and Shino.

Since Rika herself was very happily lesbian and her childhood friend was biromantic demi, a mouthful that frankly fit her to a 't' so Rika had accepted it immediately back when they were in high school.

Shino looked rather disoriented, probably from being suddenly pulled from VR when her amusephere had announced that someone was crying in the entryway of the apartment. But it was a sad truth when even Shino, the one who had the least interest in dating and drama between the three of them, didn't seem surprised that it was Asuna that was crying from another boy breaking her heart.

She gave Rika a look that the brunette translated to be, "is there anything you want me to get for you?"

Rika shook her head and simply motioned for her to come closer, instead of grabbing anything for her and their crying friend. "Nah, just come here and comfort her too, Shino," she told her with the gesture, which she knew Shino would understand. After all, there was plenty of friendship under their belts amongst other things.

Shino nodded and the virtual reality champion sniper snagged a blanket from the couch as she walked toward them and Rika gently hushed Asuna, soothing her.

"We're here Asuna," she murmured as she heard Shino's approaching footsteps, "and we're not going anywhere, kay?"

"Don't go, Rika…" Asuna blubbered and Rika's heart squeezed painfully at the words and also the knowledge that she was only saying that as her friend, nothing more.

"I would never go anywhere," Rika tightened her embrace around her and pressed her lips to the side of her head in a soothing fashion, murmuring against her silky caramel colored hair. "Shino and I aren't going anywhere Asuna, we'd never leave you."

"Sh-Shino?" Asuna hiccuped, looking for their other friend who as if on cue draped the blanket around Asuna and tucked it in toward Rika's chest and shoulders to keep Asuna warm.

"I'm here Asuna," Shino spoke, her voice a little raspy from the shift from going from VR into reality so quickly, and she adjusted the blanket snuggly.

"Don't mind how she sounds like a dying cat," Rika chuckled and turned her head to keep her voice from being muffled, "you should've seen her allergies this morning, poor girl couldn't even talk!"

"Yet you were the one curled up on the couch," Shino deadpanned in return and the banter got some thick giggles out of Asuna, which made Rika smile. Even if she tossed her friend a mock glare.

"Well excuse me for being tired," Rika pouted even if she was smiling into Asuna's hair, "at least I wasn't the zombie!"

"I'm never waking you up for anything again," Shino deadpanned and Rika laughed, which only got louder and fuller when Asuna laughed through her hiccups, effectively cheered up a decent amount by her friends' silly behavior.

Rika looked over at Shino and she sent her a thankful smile, silently thanking her for helping her comfort Asuna.

Shino just shrugged and stood up, acting as though Rika did all of the hard work. "Let me warm up something for you Asuna," she told her warmly, "eating something might help you feel a little better. Rika would do it, but she's being a teddy bear for you."

Rika's brown eyes widened as Asuna's arms slid around her neck and she threw Shino a panicked look with a strangled noise like she wanted to speak and tell her off for doing that but couldn't-

"Thank you Rika," Asuna nuzzled her nose into the crook of her neck and Rika's heart almost stopped, "you're a great friend."

Right, friend, all she would ever be to her.

Judging by the hiss she heard from Shino, the ravenette was apologizing, having not meant for it to backfire like that and just be another reminder of how deep in the damn friendzone she was.

"Oh, uh yeah," Rika plastered a mask of sincerity over her face and emotions while she felt the minor shake in her chest at the reminder that like for the past three years, she would only be one of her two best friends. "No problem, you're always worth the extra effort Asuna."

She wanted to just let go. To let go of these feelings and the pain they caused so she could be the great best friend that Asuna wanted her to be and nothing more.