Hi. Ok, so I had not planned to write a Bones songfic, but this song 'The Reason' by Hoobastank popped up on my YouTube recommended and I was just thinking, I know this song but couldn't remember the exact words... so I pressed play.
When I heard it, all I could think about was how much it suited Booth and Bones, and Brennan and her dad, and also Booth with Christine.
Thus, this was born...
Warning: May contain spoilers (or not). I'm a little fuzzy with the episodes because I jump around so...
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this songfic.
"It's one thing to have a son." Max pats Booth on the back, the odd pair watching the most important woman in their life gingerly cradling a newborn. "But having a daughter... It opens your eyes to a whole new world. Nothing will ever be the same again, and you wouldn't give it up for anything."
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
Max Keenan holds a newborn Joy in his arms, tenderly rocking her back and forth as mother and son watch from the corner.
He can't believe he has a little girl, a little princess to love and spoil... She's his little bundle of joy... his-
The precious package twists in his arms, her tiny pink mouth forming an 'O' as she lets out the most adorable yawn he has ever heard. It is then that he knows he'll have to apologise to Kyle for the rest of his life. They say that parents shouldn't play favourites, but how can he not when his barely-an-hour old daughter already has such a tight grip on his heart.
Slowly, bright blue eyes blink open, and even though he knows it's not possible, he's almost certain they're staring right at him.
He gazes into those beautiful blue orbs, looks at all the innocence and wonder they hold, and he wonders how on earth he could be blessed with a daughter as precious as she even after all the horrors he's done.
He's stolen more than he can count, broken more laws than he could ever pay penance for, and, he admits, as unintentional as it was, taken a few lives. How could a thief and murderer like him, have a child as innocent as she?
He shakes those thoughts away, not daring to tempt whoever blessed him with her to take her away. It is then he decides to renew the promise he made when Russ was born, renew it with all the vigor and determination he could muster.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
He would change his ways, be a better man than the one he was. He vows to never turn back to a life of crime, and vows to do his best to be the father his baby girl deserves. She is his reason.
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
He observes the pair from a distance, watchful eyes following the boy's hands as he touches his baby girl. Despite what he said earlier, asking said boy to watch over his baby, he will not hesitate to tear him apart, limb by limb, if he ever hurts his baby girl.
Even if he may not hurt her as much as he himself had hurt her all those years ago, she is still his baby and he would do anything to protect her.
It hurts him that he can only watch her from afar, can't even hold his own baby close to him, to be the one to wipe away all her tears and tell her that everything will be ok. It hurts that he can't be the one to promise her that he'll always be there for her.
But what hurts the most is that he's the cause of her tears, of the pain and grief she's feeling. As much as he didn't have a choice those sixteen years ago, he hates that he had to do it, that he had to cause his baby girl so much pain and suffering that her heart has yet to heal, even now.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
"I'm so sorry, honey." He whispers as Russ drives off, and he's once again forced to leave his daughter, watching her disappear in the distance. "I promise I'll try to change, to be a better person. But I can't if someone is going to hurt you. You are the reason for everything I do."
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
As she walks away from him, turns away from the relationship and camaraderie they've built over the last few days, the poker chip in his hand suddenly feels a lot heavier. He has half a mind to gamble it away, to forget all that has happened, but he knows it won't be possible.
The image of her, the feeling of having her by his side, of even just talking to her, is not one that would readily leave his mind. There's this pull to her that even their arguing over the last day or so could never take away.
So it is with that resolve that he walks away.
They may not be on friendly terms now, may not be for quite a while after all the things that have been said, but he believes in fate. He believes that they're paths will cross again, that one day they will be partners out in the field and everything will feel right in the world.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
But until then, he will work hard to change for her, to show her that he is a better man than the one she thinks he is now, because he can't bear to let her think otherwise.
She is the reason for him to change his life, to quit his bad habits in the hopes of a future with her.
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
Carefully, he strokes the baby in his arms, brushing back the soft downy hair before placing a gentle kiss, the first of many, onto her little forehead.
"Hi Princess." He whispers as she sleeps in his arms. She's so small and precious, and he can hardly believe he's holding her in his arms. It feels like it was just yesterday that he held Parker for the very first time.
But Max was right. Holding his little girl feels very different from when he held Parker. He doesn't love his son any less, but he feels as if his heart grows a thousand times bigger with each and every second he's holding his baby. Bones would say that's not possible, but he knows what he feels.
He knows then and there that he would do anything for this little girl, he would do anything to keep her safe, and happy. He'd give her the world if he could just to put a smile on her tiny little face.
And he promises to change his ways, to never fall back into the pull of gambling. She was worth too much to gamble away. He'd put every penny he'd ever try to gamble down for her, just so she can have anything she'd ever want.
She's his reason to change, both her and her mother. They've brought out the best in him, and he wouldn't give them up for anything.
And this has been an AngelFanfics productions.
