Chapter 45

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry, 15th April 2012

Sam lay pinned to a table, ropes tight against his wrists and ankles, digging into his skin. He struggled more and more against the restraints, heart pounding in his chest. Oh, fuck, he thought. That's when he heard the low cackle, an evil rumbling sound as the burning figure approached. The face was something beyond description. It was horrifying.

"Hey Sammy," the voice purred. "Having fun?"

"This isn't real, you aren't real," Sam mumbled to himself, closing his eyes.

"Not gonna work, Sammy boy," Lucifer laughed. He started humming the theme to 'It's a Small World' while he organized instruments on the table that appeared beside Sam.

"No," Sam grunted, struggling against the restraints more. The ropes scraped against his skin, leaving angry red friction burns.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you prefer the coconut song?" Lucifer punched Sam. "Too bad, I like Small World."

Sam winced in pain as he started singing again, picking up a scalpel. "Maybe I should carve the words into your chest? Might get to that little cold heart of yours."

"This isn't happening… it's just a dream." Sam ground out his mantra, trying to ignore Lucifer. "Not happening."

"Oh, it's happening… maybe if I carve nice and deep?" Lucifer smirked as he brought the scalpel down to his chest, starting to cut into the skin. Sam held back the groan of pain that threatened to escape.

"Oh Sammy, don't hold back. I like hearing you scream." Lucifer smirked, making the wound larger. "I love playing doctor. How about a triple bypass?" The scalpel started to move deeper in his chest, and there was sudden agony as Lucifer ripped the scalpel out, looking impatient.

"Oh, nurse?" Lucifer sang loudly. He gave a swift grin down to Sam. Sam struggled to turn his head, but when he did, he saw Jess standing there with a sadistic smile on her face.

"Jess…?" He choked out. Jess approached him and slammed her hand on his chest, her nails pointed and razor-sharp. The nails dug in, and with a push, she shoved her hand down-

Sam jolted upright in bed. He looked over to his side and nearly screamed at the sight of Jessica's face inches from his. He managed to stop it before he made a sound. His heart was thumping against his sternum. He tried taking deep calming breaths, but it wasn't helping.

"Sam?" Came a tired voice from beside him. Jess rolled over and looked at him with bleary eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sorry Jess. Bad dream," Sam ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

"About Hell?" Jessica sat up, worry in her eyes.

"Pretty much, yeah," Sam grimaced. "It's okay. I'm used to it."

"Oh, don't lie to her," Lucifer's voice came from the other side of the room. Sam avoided looking in his direction. He'd been very careful to hide his hallucinations and had been successful. Mostly.

"She really is a hot nurse…" Lucifer sighed dreamily as he stared at Jess. Again, Sam ignored the devil's taunts.

"Sam, you have to be honest with me, please." Jess held him close.

"It was something that happened to me in Hell," Sam grimaced. "Lucifer cut my heart out and made me watch."

"Oh, Sam…." Jess wrapped her arms around him.

"It's okay Jess," Sam replied, hugging her back. "The Hell memories coming back are just a lot. I'm adjusting, that's all"

"I wish I could take it away," Jess said sadly. "I don't think there's any memory magic strong enough to take those kinds of memories away without causing more harm than good."

"I've already spoken to Dumbledore about it." Sam sighed loudly. "Pensieves are too experimental to take away the memories. So are some of the spells."

"I could talk to Poppy and get you a Sleeping Draught?" She ran her fingers through his hair.

"At least to help you sleep better."

"I think It's probably better if I just face it head-on." Sam sighed again. "What time is it?" he asked out of the blue.

"Six-thirty, why?" Jess asked, confused by the sudden change in subject.

"I have to tell you something. But Dean needs to be here too."

"You want to go wake him up, knowing what you're probably walking into?" Jessica laughed a little until she realized how serious he was.

"I should have told you guys straight away," Sam frowned. "I'll be right back." He got to his feet and walked to the adjoining door to Dean and Jo's room and knocked. A moment passed before Dean came to the door, rubbing his eyes.

"What the hell man? It's not even seven am…" Dean complained. "I was having a good dream. I was kicking major zombie ass."

"Look, will you just stop complaining for five minutes and listen to me?" Sam hissed in frustration. "I gotta talk to you. It's important."

"Okay, okay. Lemme put some pants on."

Sam nodded and walked back to his room, Dean came in after him soon after, dressed in a long purple robe tied around his waist. He grinned at Jess and Sam but they each chose to ignore it.

"What's up Sammy?" Dean asked.

"The stage is yours Sammy boy." Lucifer smiled. Sam shut his eyes for a moment and took a breath, sending a mental 'fuck you' in Lucifer's general vicinity. "That hurt a little…"

"I'm not doing as good as I said I was…" Sam sighed. "I'm struggling…"

"In what way?" Dean asked.

"I'm having a lot of nightmares." Dean cut him off.

"That's to be expected though. I mean, after everything you've been through, you'd be nuts not to have a few nightmares." Dean looked confused.

"No, you don't understand," Sam protested, frowning. "It's not just that. I'm… I'm having a hard time figuring out what's real."

"Are you seeing things?" Dean asked.

"I'm seeing Lucifer everywhere," Sam admitted. His voice was a little shaky. "It started when the wall broke, and it's getting worse since." He could see the anger forming in Dean's eyes.

"Sam, for fuck's sake!" Dean exclaimed, running his hand through his hair.

"Dean, don't lose your head." Jessica glared at her boyfriend's brother and then turned to Sam.

"Why didn't you tell us sooner?"

"I thought it would go away by itself, some sort of side effect that would wear off," Sam interjected.

"Well, it obviously didn't, did it?!" Dean snapped.

"How long did you think you could keep this a secret, Sam?"

"I wasn't trying to keep it a secret! It was bad enough that I collapsed at your wedding. I was going to tell you. I just wanted to know what I was up against!"

"Smart move Sammy…." Lucifer rolled his eyes. Dean noticed Sam's quick look in the opposite direction. "Are you seeing him right now?"

"Yeah…" Sam admitted, running a hand over his face. "He's over there…" Sam pointed to the dresser in which Lucifer was casually perching on.

"Like the dumbass can see me." Lucifer jumped up and moved behind Dean. First, making Moose antlers behind his head, and then he thrust his hand through Dean's chest. Sam staggered back in shock, his eyes wide as he saw Dean fall to the floor, and Lucifer stood proudly. Dean's heart was in his hand, the organ still pumping sluggishly, spraying blood on the stone floor.

"No!" Sam's face paled, looking at his brother's body, so reminiscent of Crowley's attack.

"Sam?!" Jess shouted as she caught him, preventing him from collapsing

"Sam? Sam!" Dean's voice came back to him. Suddenly, Sam's vision was clear. Dean was kneeling with Sam on the floor, eyes filled with concern. His hand was raised, ready to slap him if necessary. He noticed some clarity coming back into his little brother's eyes. Sam nodded.

"I'm okay now…" he mumbled.

"The hell you are." Jessica glared at Dean, knowing him shouting wasn't good for Sam.

"I know, alright?" Sam frowned. His vision was swimming, so he closed his eyes. Pain pulsed in his head as he gathered his wits about him.

"You can't teach like this." Dean sighed. "Take the day off…"

"I'll get over it," Sam replied stubbornly.

Dean growled out a string of profanities.

"Fucking hell man, stop being so damn stubborn. Do you wanna give those kids a heart attack when you pass out again? And don't say it won't happen." He added before Sam could argue. "I'm just worried about you man."

They were interrupted by a knock on the door. Jess opened it to reveal Jo, Mary, and John. "We heard shouting. What in the hell is going on?" John asked.

"You had the door locked," Jo explained, pointing to the door that joined the brother's rooms.

"Sam's got the devil riding shotgun in his brain, that's what…" Dean was literally fuming. "He's been hallucinating Lucifer and didn't think to inform us that he was tripping balls."

"I can explain it for myself thanks, Dean." Sam's voice coming out not as sharp and confident as he wished. "I don't know what it is, but I'm seeing Lucifer, and he's messing with me. It's obviously something to do with the Hell memories coming back."

"I know it isn't real but… He's pretty convincing…" Sam frowned. "I know you're pissed." His hackles were starting to rise, still seeing the anger in Dean's eyes. He was not a child anymore. "I'm dealing with this."

"We know Sammy," Mary put her hand on Sam's.

"Of course, take his side…." Dean grumbled.

"You know what Dean? Fuck off," Sam snapped. "I'm stressed enough with all this shit. I know I should have told you earlier, and I'm sorry for that. But this is my problem. Not yours. Oh, wait. You had the wall put up in the first place. So, I guess this is your fault. I just have to deal with it." At that, Sam got to his feet and walked out. The sound of the door slamming echoed in the silence.

Four days passed very awkwardly between the brothers. The students noted the tension but chose not to get involved. They were still talking, but only on work terms, both still angry in their stubborn Winchester way. Jessica and Jo watched sadly as their moods darkened by the day. Both brothers wanted to reconcile but only if the other did so first. Jessica and Jo were annoyed at their partners, knowing it was just because neither wanted to admit they were wrong.

Dean knew he'd crossed a line with Sam. He was right. He wasn't a child; he was a grown man. But he couldn't just stop worrying about him. It was his job, as much as it annoyed Sam. He didn't want to admit his weakness to his family.

They decided to focus on different matters.

Jo finally had enough by the fourth day, deciding Dean needed to man up and apologize, or do something to help Sam.

"Dean, come on…" She looked at her husband. "I know you're worried, but you two gotta make up. Is there anything you can think of to help him?"

"I don't know Jo…" Dean sighed. "They didn't teach devil riding shotgun in hunting school… Maybe if Cas would answer a prayer… Or a damn phone. That reminds me. I don't know what's up with him either."

"What do you mean?" Jo looked confused

"Cas, I mean, he apologized, but things aren't adding up…"

"So, you think he's acting shady?"

"A little bit, yeah. Dean frowned.

"Will you, at least, have a talk with Sam about it?" Jo asked. "Come on, swallow your pride, just this once? For me?" She knew she was laying it on thick… but if it worked… "Set a good example for your daughter/son."

"Okay, okay," Dean sighed. "I think he's in the Demonology classroom, researching." He snorted with a small smirk. "Already using our kid to bribe me…"

Dean left the staff quarters and walked toward his and Sam's classroom. He found his brother looking over some books.

"Hey, Sammy," Dean began hesitantly. "I'm sorry…"

"Took you long enough?" Sam grumbled without looking up, then sighed and mumbled.

"I'm sorry too. I know you're just worried about me…" Both brothers smiled a little at each other.

"Well, that was easy," Dean laughed.

"Ugh, men. Now was that so hard?" Jo burst into the room with Jessica, John, and Mary.

"Were you guys listening?" Sam looked to his parents and the girls.

"Yes," Jessica replied simply.

Ellen laughed. "There was nothing else on TV. Because we don't have one over here."

"Hilarious," Dean snarked. "Look, we need to talk about something."

"What now?" Sam asked.

"Cas."

"What about Cas?" Jess asked.

"There's something wrong with him… I'm worried about him," Dean replied. "I talked to him at the wedding. He said sorry about not being there. I said it was okay. But… something was off with him."

"Like what?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

"Think about it. How he's been acting the last few months. He keeps spouting the 'Angel war' defence, but I don't buy it anymore."

"He has been pretty hit-and-miss lately," Sam frowned.

"I mean, when we found out from Eve that Crowley was still alive, it was only when I looked back at it that I realized. Cas didn't even look that surprised." he scoffed a little. "That doesn't seem strange to anyone?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "We thought he burned Crowley's bones." The brothers explained Crowley's demise, well what they thought as such, a few months prior.

"He could have burned the wrong bones. Crowley tricked him?" Mary suggested.

"He's an angel," John said pointedly.

"I'm sure he can make a mistake, like anyone else," Jo said.

"Nobody's saying nothing yet," Dean began.

"Wait… you think that Cas is in with Crowley. Crowley?" Sam asked.

"Look, I'm just saying I don't know. Now, look, I hate myself for even thinking it. But I don't know," Dean sighed. "I'm praying that we're wrong here. But if we ain't… if there's a snowball's chance here… That means we're dealing with an Angel gone dark side. Which means, we've got to be cautious, we've got to be smart."

The small group of hunters looked grave as they contemplated the ramifications of this bombshell.

"So, what do we do?" Sam asked.

"Summon him? Talk to him about it?" Dean sighed. "We need to plan what we're gonna say."

They got to work, preparing to summon the Angel. Dean's heart was heavy in his chest. Castiel was his best friend. Could he really betray them by working with Crowley of all people? And for what? What possible benefit could Cas get by helping the King of Hell crack open Purgatory? It didn't make any sense.

Then came where to put him, far enough away from the students that no one would just happen across them just in case shit went sideways. Then Dean remembered hearing Filch complain one day about missing the old detentions when they would hang students by their thumbs from the rafters of the dungeons.

So here they were, standing in one of the rooms in the dungeons, the Holy Oil ready.

"Castiel, uh… We need you for a little pow-wow down here, so come on down," Dean prayed. There was a ruffle of wings a moment later as Castiel appeared.

"Hello," he greeted.

"Thanks for coming."

"How can I help?" Cas asked.

"Oh, look. We, um, we have a new plan. We think we've finally figured out a way to track down Crowley," Sam told him.

"What is it?" Cas asked.

Dean instantly lit a match and dropped it on the floor by Castiel's feet. Fire sprung to life in a circle around him, trapping him in a ring of Holy Fire.

"It's you," Dean said, trying to keep his voice calm and even despite the betrayal he felt.

"What are you doing?" Cas demanded.

"We gotta talk," Dean began.

"About what? Let me go!" Cas exclaimed and got no answer.

"How long have you been watching us?" Sam asked with a glare.

"It's hard to understand. It's hard to explain. Just let me go. Let me out, and I can-" Cas began but Dean interrupted.

"You got to look at me, man. You gotta level with me and tell me what's going on. Look me in the eye and tell me you're not working with Crowley," he said in an almost desperate tone. Hoping against all hope that he was wrong, Cas wouldn't double-cross them. Other Angels maybe, but not him… Cas looked at Dean but looked away quickly.

"You fucking bastard…" Dean spat, his anger boiling over.

"Please, let me explain," Castiel said with his hands up, desperate for his friend to listen.

"You're in it with him? You and Crowley have been going after Purgatory together? You have, huh? This whole time and you're helping this Voldemort guy?" Dean demanded. "It's all true, isn't it?" The Angel didn't answer. "ISN'T IT?!" He repeated, running towards the Holy Fire barrier.

Castiel winced but pressed on. "I did it to protect you. I did it to protect all of you,"

"Protect us how? By opening a hole into monster-land!?" Sam exclaimed.

"You've royally fucked us over Cas! Do you think this is protecting us?!" Dean yelled. "All of us are in danger. Not just us, but Jess, Jo, and our baby!"
Cas looked at Dean in surprise.

"Jo is having a baby?" he asked, his blue eyes filling with regret at putting another innocent soul in peril.

"Not that you care," Dean scowled. "You really fucked up Cas! All for what? Your Angel war?"

"I can stop Raphael. I can't really explain now but please, you have to trust me," Cas begged.

"Trust you?! How in the hell are we supposed to trust you now?" Sam said exasperatedly.

Cas looked between the two of them, trying to find a bit of reason within their expressions, but finding nothing but bitterness and anger. "I'm still me. I'm still your friend. Sam… I'm the one who raised you from Perdition," Cas said, as he looked into the younger hunter's eyes, begging him to see sense.

"Well, no offence… But you completely fucked it up. Wait… Did you bring me back soulless…? On purpose?" Sam said with an air of disgust.

"How could you think that?" Castiel replied in a shocked tone.

"Well, I'm thinking a lot of things right now, Cas," Sam snapped. "You teamed up with Crowley, that sounds pretty unthinkable…"

"Listen to me. Raphael will kill us all. He will turn the world into a graveyard. I had no choice!" Castiel explained, his voice growing more desperate, and his eyes were wide and unusually expressive for an Angel.

"No, you had a choice. You just made the wrong one," Dean spoke up, his stomach dropping to the floor.

"You don't understand. It's complicated," Castiel pressed. Dean approached Cas.

"No, actually, it's not, and you know that. Why else would you keep this whole thing a secret, huh? Unless you knew that it was wrong? When crap like this comes around, we deal with it… Like we always have. What we don't do is we don't go out and make another deal with the Devil!" he exclaimed.

"It sounds so simple when you say it like that. Where were you when I needed to hear it?" Castiel said quietly, looking down.

"I was there. Where were you?" Dean snapped. "Because you sure as Hell weren't there when I was stabbed, or any of the last few months. You should have come to us for help, Cas…"

"Maybe. It's too late now. I can't turn back now. I can't," Castiel admitted with an air of defeat.

"It's not too late. Damn it, Cas! We can fix this!" Dean exclaimed.

"I want you to understand," Cas urged.

"Oh, believe me, I get it. Blah, blah, Raphael, right?" Dean snapped.

"I'm doing this for you, Dean. I'm doing this because of you," Cas scowled.

"Because of me. Yeah. You've got to be kidding me," scoffed Dean in an incredulous tone.

"You're the one who taught me that freedom and free will –" Dean cut him off.

"You're a fucking child, you know that? Just because you can do what you want doesn't mean that you get to do whatever you want!" Sam exploded.

"You tell him!" Lucifer grinned out of the corner of Sam's eye.

"I know what I'm doing, Dean,"

"I'm not gonna logic you, okay? I'm saying don't… Just 'cause. I'm asking you not to. That's it," Dean deadpanned.

"I don't understand," Castiel's eyes squinted.

"Look, you are like a brother to me. So, if I'm asking you not to do something… You got to trust me, man,"

"Or what?" Cas challenged.

"Or we'll have to do what I have to do to stop you," Sam scowled.

"You can't. You're just men. I'm an Angel,"

"I don't know. I've taken some pretty big fish," Dean grit out.