The sound of a clock ticking was all that could be heard coming from the shared living room of the little yellow Dharma-issue bungalow. Occasionally there was an additional interruption of a page turning or a low chuckle coming from one of the readers who sat across from each other. One sat with her legs outstretched on the couch, a pillow propped behind her while the other sat in the wing back chair; his legs splayed across an ottoman.
On a typical night in the last few months, they could be found like this. Only the quiet was usually replaced by their roommates conversation coming from the dining room table. This was not that night however. Miles and Jin had gone to play poker and probably wouldn't be back for some time, leaving the other two roommates to enjoy the peace they both loved. And so the silence persisted. He sipped on his beer. She held a cup of hot tea in one hand and her book in the other. It should have a been a perfect evening.
The only problem was Jim LaFleur seemed to find it impossible to focus on his book. He would read a line and then peer up from it to glance at his quiet companion. He watched her big blue eyes scanning the page. He admired how her legs went on for days. Then on his 5th attempt to stop watching her he caught her taking a sip of her tea. He couldn't help, but take in every moment of this mundane action. When her tongue flicked out to lick her lips after a long sip it took everything in him not to imagine his own tongue on her mouth. He was getting hard and was sure she would notice soon. Crossing his legs, he jammed his face further into his book for fear of being caught. He read the same line 10 times trying to still his breathing and get rid of the bulge in his pants. Juliet continued reading, seemingly oblivious to the suffering of the man across from her.
As it turns out, she was not impervious to the weighty feeling of someone watching her intently. She simply wasn't sure what to do with that knowledge and so she pretended to read her book, occasionally flipping a page while she thought about what to do next. She decided a sip of her tea would buy more time, but she thought she heard a slight moan coming from the man across from her when she did that. So she picked the book back up and continued on until she couldn't take it anymore.
"What is it James?"
He didn't dare show his face from behind his book. So he answered as nonchalantly as he could without looking at her.
"What's what?"
She sat up and put her open book face-down on the coffee table in front of her.
"You keep staring at me. So what is it?"
He decided he couldn't hide behind the book forever so he laid it in his lap and finally met her gaze from across the room. She didn't look mad, but he wasn't sure what the expression on her face was exactly. When he didn't answer she continued to prod.
"Is something wrong or did I do something to offend you?"
She was looking at him now with concern and he immediately felt guilty. Shit, he thought. How was he going to get out of this. He was not going to tell the woman in front of him about the thoughts that were just running through his head, but he didn't want her to think he was mad at her either.
"NO, no. Nothing like that…" He paused trying to come up with the lie.
She shook her head waiting for an explanation.
"I just…this book is driving me nuts and I uhh….I'm just having trouble focusing. I guess I got used to Miles whining all the time while we're reading. So, without him here it's just too damn quiet is all. And I guess I was jealous that it didn't bother you."
This was the worst lie she had ever heard. It didn't make her feel any better to imagine what he might actually be thinking. She didn't remember doing anything to piss him off. Maybe being alone with her made him think about all the things she had done to him before. She decided not to push it and let his lie slide.
"Well, do you want to put on some music or something?"
He didn't want to listen to any music. At this point he didn't think he could keep reading either. Plus despite his best efforts, he was going to have to attend to some needs very soon.
"No, it's fine. I don't want to disturb your reading. I'll just hit the hay early. Have a good night."
She watched as he practically ran out of the room. His absence immediately left her with a familiar cold loneliness that she had almost forgotten about since arriving in the 70s. As she sat their flummoxed, she tried to figure out when she had become so reliant on his company. The cozy evening had suddenly left her feeling adrift in an ocean of despair (and a cold reminder that she was literally stranded on this island in a time she didn't belong to). After she heard his door shut she made her way to the bathroom, deciding it was time to hang it up for the night too.
James was glad when he heard the shower go on as he was able to take care of the itch he most definitely needed to scratch. When he finished, he lie awake berating himself because he knew he left her feeling upset. Sooner or later he was going to have to fess up. He just wasn't sure how she would take it. They had each other's back. They were great friends. He couldn't even remember hating her anymore. In fact, he was pretty sure she was too good for him. Maybe she was just meant to be his friend; a gift of happiness in what before now had been a life of pain.
The only problem was there was this little feeling of hope that kept creeping up in the pit of his stomach whenever they were together (which was often). Maybe, just maybe she also wanted it to be more. He could never tell if the glint in her eyes meant she was flirting or she just found him amusing on an island that was otherwise dull. The thought that she didn't like him made him scowl in the dark. He was going to have to do something soon or they would both go mad.
