LISA

My fingers raked through my hair as I watched Jennie leave. She surprised me when she told me those three big words, and the one thing I noticed after I said nothing, she's refused to look at or say another word to me.

I guess I don't blame her.

I'm such a fucking coward.

She doesn't deserve this, nor does she deserve me.

The thing is. I do love Jennie. I fucking love her so much, and I'm afraid of what will happen once I finally tell her the truth.

I never meant for this to happen between Jennie and me, but it did. And now I need to do something about it.

Since marrying Kendal, I have felt something wasn't right between us. She's been distant, cold, angry, and fuck... she's never happy unless she wants something from me. And to be honest, I feel she too has been cheating on me. Even before we married, I knew that day I should never have gone through with it, but I did. And here I am now, extremely unhappy with my wife and overly pleased with Jennie.

Anytime I have ever brought up divorce to Kendal, she's let it go in one ear and out the other, ignoring all the problems in our relationship and refusing to see there is no love between us.

I loudly exhaled while turning to Sorn. Now I know what Jennie was saying about getting the stink eye from her. Not only is she giving me the stink eye, but it's also an evil look.

If looks could kill, I'd be dead right now.

"What?" I asked, raising my palms into the air.

"I didn't say anything," she hissed, looking away from me and down to her paperwork. "But I will tell you this. If you're having an affair with that Jennie girl, you better get your obituary written. Because you and I both know Kendal will kill you. Most likely, while your sleeping."

I sighed Sorn's right.

Fuck...

I headed back to my office, sat in my chair, and leaned my head back, closing my eyes and thinking about what I'm doing. I know I have to end this with Kendal and I can't go on doing this to either one of them anymore. I'm afraid to lose Jennie, which is something I don't want to happen. And as for Kendal, I don't want to hurt her either, but something tells me she's just with me for convenience and shows she's married, even if it is a loveless marriage.

Of course, my phone has to ring while I'm thinking, trying to figure out my life and of all people it's her.

"What do you need Kendal," I growled.

"Geez, a nice hello would have been nice to hear. But whatever," she snapped back.

"I asked, what did you need? I'm a little busy at the moment."

She huffed, then asked, "I was calling to see if you could pick up some things at the grocery store on your way home. Please?"

"I guess," I groaned, rubbing my face. "Send me the damn list, then."

"Thank you."

After hanging up with Kendal, I sat in my chair for the longest time, thinking. I have to do something soon. And fast. If I don't, I'll lose Jennie for good.

I can't let that happen.

I picked up my phone, looked at Kendal's message, and sighed while standing. I don't know why she can't get the shit herself.

"I'm leaving for the day," I informed Sorn as I stopped at her desk.

"Oh?"

"Kendal needs me to stop at the grocery store. I guess I'll see you in the morning."

Along the way home, I stopped at the grocery store, grabbed what Kendal needed, then stopped at the floral shop. I couldn't stop thinking about the hurt look on Jennie's face when she left my office, and it's been haunting my mind all day.

I needed to let Jennie know and show I do love her, and as I looked at all the floral arraignments, one stood out the most. A red vase filled with two dozen long stem red roses, accented with baby's breath and assorted greenery. It was the perfect assortment for her, and after bringing it up to the counter, I grabbed a card, wrote my message, then placed the card in the cardholder and pushed the face towards the cashier.

"I know it's late in the day. But is there any way you can make it happen for these flowers to be delivered tonight?"

"Let me check."

"I'll even pay extra if you say you can't," I desperately begged.

The cashier came back and smiled as he spoke, assuring me they will deliver Jennie the flowers within the next hour.

"Thank you so much."

Now to go home and deal with Kendal. And on my way home, everything I wanted to say to her ran through my mind, with me practicing how to tell her we're over.

I set the bag of groceries on the counter, and before I could walk away, Kendal greeted me and kissed me on the lips.

"Thank you... I didn't think you would do it," she wickedly grinned.

"Did I have a choice? Had I not, we would have fought all night. Something I'm in no mood for," I said, removing her hands from me. "I'm going to take a shower. Excuse me."

As I stood underneath the hot flowing water with my head lowered, and my hands pressed against the wall, my marriage to Kendal kept flashing before my eyes. Then it went to the day I met Jennie. That day was what put a smile on my face.

I was so deep in thought that when I lowered my hands and turned around, I didn't realize Kendal had entered the shower until she grabbed hold of my dick and placed me into her mouth.

I jumped, then snapped while pushing her off me, "Jesus, Kendal!"

"Damn, Lisa. You looked so tense when you got home, and I thought maybe you would like a blowjob."

"No. Actually. I don't," I said as Kendal stood.

"Why not?" She asked while placing her hands on my chest.

I reached up, grabbed her hands, and removed them from me. "Because. I'm in no mood right now."

I wasn't in the mood, either. I also felt, if I were to allow Kendal to give me a fucking blowjob, which I'll admit, was the only thing Kendal was good at, I'd be cheating on Jennie.

Hell. I'm already cheating on Jennie with me being married to Kendal.

"Come on, Lisa," she begged. "We haven't showered, had sex, or anything in months," she said, eyeing me like I was a piece of candy. Kendal's hands wiggled out of mine. Then, cupped either side of my face and stared me in the eyes before pressing her lips to mine. "What is going on?" She hissed when I refused to kiss her back.

"I've got a lot on my mind. As I said, I'm not in the mood," I snapped, exiting the shower.

I had to get out of there. I know we're married. But I couldn't let Kendal seduce me and have me fall into her little web she was spinning the way she was trying. If I allowed her to continue with what she was doing, it would only make it more difficult and fight me more once I served her divorce papers.

Eating dinner with Kendal was somewhat quiet. Although she didn't open her mouth to speak, the intense stabbing of her food, the loud, angry chewing, and the evil glares she was giving me the entire time was enough for me to envision her stabbing me while I slept.

I probably deserve it, but how can I continue with our marriage when there isn't any love between us. There never really was. This was a marriage she wanted and what I thought I wanted until we said our I do's. That's when I realized it was a mistake. And now I'm paying for it.

~~~~~~~~~~

After dinner, I checked my phone to see if Jennie tried getting a hold of me, which she didn't. The only message I received was from the floral shop, confirming they delivered the flowers.

Seeing the flowers were delivered nearly an hour ago and without getting any response from Jennie, my heart and stomach instantly dropped and felt I screwed everything up with her. I had to know what she was feeling, so I quickly sent her a message;

To: [Jen]

I hope everything is okay. I miss you...



JENNIE

I needed to get my mind off Lisa, and after getting home, I turned on music, turning it up loud, and started cleaning. It was the only thing I could do to keep my mind compos mentis. Just when I finished vacuuming, there was a knock at the door.

It better not be you, Lisa, I groaned as I headed for the door.

It wasn't Lisa. It was a man holding a package. "Can I help you?"

"Hi. I have a delivery for a Jennie Kim, Am I at the right apartment?"

"Yes. That's me."

He smiled. "Oh, good. Can you sign right here, saying I've delivered your package?" He said, handing me a clipboard and pointing to where I needed to sign. After signing, he gave me the box. "Have a good night," he smiled, tipping his ball cap.

I carried the package over to my kitchen counter, grabbed a knife, then cut the box open. While opening the box, I got a beautiful whiff of flowers that immediately hit my senses. As I looked inside, my mouth dropped, then a smile formed as I pulled out the vase and saw the beautiful array of red roses. I set them on the counter, still smiling as I spun the vase around, then I noticed a card and grabbed it. Even though I had a feeling they were from Lisa, I was somewhat hoping they were from someone else.

Please don't ask me why. I just am. But... now that I see the card, the flowers are from who I wished they weren't.

Jennie,

You mean the world to me. My feelings for you are strong and very deep. I can't help but think of you all day and night. And to be honest, I can't get you off my mind, no matter how hard I try. I hope you're not upset with me. Love- Lisa.

I set the card down, then stared at the flowers. The flowers are beautiful, and the card Lisa wrote was just as beautiful, but she still has me feeling confused. Does she love me, or does she only want me for sex? That's all we do is have sex. It's always here at my place, and now, lately, her office. Hell, she has yet to show me where she lives.

I fixed the floral arraignment, then set the vase in the center of my dining room table, with the card from Lisa resting it against it, then sighed.

Maybe she does love me.

Instead of letting Lisa know I received the flowers, I chose to finish cleaning. Afterward, I laid on the couch and turned on a movie, falling asleep not long into the film. I wasn't sure how long I fell asleep, but my phone making noises awoke me. Seeing it was from Lisa, I opened and read her message, set my phone down, and fell asleep.



LISA

I stared at my phone for the longest time, waiting for a response back from Jennie. When I saw she read the message and still didn't respond, I set my phone down and groaned. She's pissed at me.

"Is something the matter?" Kendal asked with a hint of anger in her tone.

"No."

"Then why do you keep looking at your phone?"

"Because. I've been waiting to hear a response about something important all day, and I still haven't received it.

That's why," I jeered, lowering my head and pinching my temples with my left hand.

"I'm sure you'll get whatever you've been waiting for soon," she said nicely while sitting down next to me and lowering her head on my shoulder. My eyes closed, and the next thing I did, prayed for my phone to ring. I've been a bit rude to Kendal all night for no reason and need some excuse to remove her from my shoulder.

Then I got what I was hoping for. My phone rang. Only it wasn't the call I was waiting to hear. I slipped Kendal off me and stood. "Where are you going?" Kendal asked tiredly.

"My mom called. She needs help with my dad."

"Would you like me to come with?" She yawned.

"No, thanks. I don't need any help. Why don't you stay here and get some sleep?"

~~~~~~~~~~~

I walked into my parents' home, saw my dad on the floor, and my mom was on the phone. I walked over to my dad, kneeled to see if he was okay, then lifted and carried him over to the couch. "What happened?" I asked while laying him down.

"He stood, started walking, then fell. When I couldn't get him up, I called you," my mother said as she set her phone down. "That was Kendal on the phone."

I sighed and covered my face while lowering my head. "I told her to go to bed and not worry about anything."

Her brows lowered. "Are you two okay?"

"Has it ever been?" I groaned.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," I said, shaking my head. "Let's worry about dad, okay?"

My dad extended out his arm and patted my shoulder. "I'm fine. I got lightheaded when I stood from my chair, then fell when I started walking. Really. I'm okay," he insisted.

I looked at my dad, and seeing the paleness in his face had me feeling a bit concerned. "Are you sure? Maybe we should bring you into the hospital and make sure everything is okay."

"I'm fine, Lisa. If you could help me into my bed, that would be great."

I looked at my mom, and when she nodded, assuring me, it was okay, I helped him to bed. "If you need me. Call me right away. Okay?"

"You know I will," my mother said.

I was just about to pull up to my driveway when something inside me told me not to. Instead of turning, I drove right on by, then turned around and started heading to Jennie.

While pulling into the parking lot, I saw her car, then parked in the empty spot beside hers. I stared at the steering wheel for a minute, then opened the door, twirling my keys around my finger as I walked into the building.

After knocking a couple of minutes, I let myself in with the key she had given me after her not answering. I saw the flowers I sent her on the table, then looked over, saw the TV was on, and walked over to the couch. There she was, sound asleep.

I sat on the table in front of her couch, watching her breathe and sleep. I rested my elbows on my knees, folded my hands together, rested my chin onto my folded hands, and stared at her.

What a fucking mess I'm in.

I'm married to someone I despise and having an affair with someone I genuinely love. With my love for Jennie, growing stronger and stronger, every damn day.

I grabbed her phone, turned off the TV, then lifted and carried her to bed. I was carefully laying her into the bed and not wanting to wake her. And just as I was covering her with her blankets, her eyes opened, locking with mine.

"What are you-" she started saying until I pressed two fingers onto her mouth, quieting her.

"Shh... go to sleep."

I turned around, started walking to the door, but stopped when she reached for my hand and pulled me to her.

"Are you leaving?"

"I'll stay if you want me to."

"Please stay."

My fingers slid through her hair, brushing some stray hairs covering her face, behind her ears, and smiled. "I'll stay, then," I whispered.

"Why did you come here, anyway?"

"Because I was worried about you. You left my office looking upset, and since I hadn't heard from you all night, I figured I would stop by to make sure you were okay."

She reached her hands up to my face, cupping either side and pulling me down to her level. "Now that you're here, I'm feeling better," she smiled, pressing her lips to mine.

"Are you coming to bed or not?"

"Yes."

I removed my clothes, then made sure my phone was on if my mother called, placed it on the nightstand, climbed into her bed, and pulled her into my arms. "This is my world, right here," I whispered, kissing the top of her head and tightening my hold around her.

She tilted her head back, puckered out her lips, and after I kissed her, she smiled. "Thank you for the flowers. They're beautiful."

"Those flowers deserved to be with the right person. And that was you," I said lowly, kissing her. "And you're welcome. Now close your eyes and get some sleep. I'm not going anywhere unless my mom calls and needs my help again, okay?"

She looked at me curiously, curious as to what I meant, then she must have figured it out when Jennie lowered her head onto my chest, and I felt her eyelashes graze my chest as she closed her eyes.

With her in my arms, I was content.

She was content.

The way she made me feel every time I'm with her was the feeling I wished to have every day. The feeling I thought I was to have when I married Kendal. That feeling has never been there, and now I know for sure I made the biggest mistake of my life when me and Kendal married.

~~~~~~~~~~