Hello! I hope everyone had a great holiday! Here is another update...I think you will enjoy this chapter ;)

p.s. thank you for all the reviews! you are awesome :)


Chapter 14

Over the next week, I manage to meet with Katniss at her house in the Seam. I've been more careful than I was the first time, sneaking out after my family was asleep but returning before anyone was awake. My presence has seemed to keep her nightmares away…so far. I know it's only a matter of time before they return.

I wait until I'm sure my mother's asleep and then tiptoe out of the house, carrying my boots to remain quiet. When I'm on my front steps, I slip them on and jog to her house. I let myself in through the back and kick my shoes off before heading to her room. I knock twice on her doorframe before entering. She's waiting for me in her bed. A small candle on her nightstand provides a dim light in the room. As I walk closer, I see a wide smile spread across her face. It thrills me to know that I can make her smile like that, just with my presence.

"I was starting to think you weren't coming." she said.

"Had to wait a little longer for Mom to fall asleep. Didn't feel like getting caught." I explain as I pull back the covers to join her. "You know how Hazelle can be." I joke.

"You're lucky to have a mom that cares about you." she comments, her smile disappearing.

"Catnip, your mom cares about you."

"Not like yours."

"There are different ways to show you care." I tell her, trying to make her feel better.

"My mother has a funny way of showing it." she bluntly tells me. I am beyond convincing her. It's true, her mother isn't there for her as much as she needs her to be. She's been that way ever since the mining accident that took both our fathers' lives. Our mothers had very different outcomes as a result of that. While it made my mother rise up to take care of her family; Mrs. Everdeen withered away. I always thought it to be very selfish of her, to shut down like then when her two children needed her. If it weren't for Katniss, the two of them would be in the group home for sure. As vocal as I am about things, this is one thing I would never tell her, even though I know she thinks it too.

"I care about you." I murmur.

"Oh, stop." she says with a smile as she nudges me. She thinks I'm messing around with her. If only she knew how sincere I was trying to be. I don't say anything else on the matter. I'm not ready for her to know how I really feel about her. We instead talk about our days. I recount some humorous stories told by some of my friends at the mines, which gets a few laughs from her. She tells me about her trip into town today.

"I went to see Peeta today." she mentions quietly. I feel the jealousy grow inside of me at the mention of his name. That is the last person I want her seeing right now. The last thing I need at the moment is competition.

"And?" I ask coolly.

"He won't even talk to me."

"I'm sure he'll come around, Catnip." I say, feigning my support.

"He's not one to hold a grudge."

"To be fair, you did pretend to be in love with him."

"I thought he was too…that it was just for the Games. I didn't think that anyone could feel that way about me." she says as her eyes flicker away from mine.

"You think you are immune to being desired?" I ask with a laugh.

"Gale, I'm not like other girls." she says, sitting up in bed. I follow her.

"And you think that matters?" I ask. She remains silent so I continue. "Peeta Mellark wasn't the first and I doubt he'll be the last." She rolls her eyes in response. "You've never wanted that? To feel loved?" I murmured.

"I could never afford that before."

"And what about now? You no longer need to worry about starving. Could things be different now?"

"There are other things." she tells me.

"Like what?"

"Love leads to other stuff…marriage and children. You know I want none that. Not with the Reapings and the Games. Especially now." she says with fear in her eyes.

"It doesn't have to." I whisper. She starts to tell me something but quickly stops herself before I can find out more. I can't help but notice the fear in her eyes.

"We should get some sleep." she mentions as she lowers herself to her pillow. I do the same. She cuddles up beside me and I drape my around her, assuming the same position as all those nights before.

"Katniss, you know you can tell me anything." I whisper.

"Ok." she whispers back. Silence follows. She's keeping something from me, I just know it. I saw the look in her eyes when she stopped herself. I'm not sure why she can't tell me. I'm her best friend. I close my eyes, deciding to sleep instead. I can only hope that she'll tell me eventually and that it won't be as bad as I think it could be.

I am jostled from my sleep by Katniss flailing against me. It only takes me a second to relizes she's having a nightmare.

"Catnip." I respond as I gently try to break her from her bad dream. It doesn't take much to break her from it. Her eyes connect with mine and I can see the fear return to her. "Catnip—" I start but am cut off when she removes herself from the bed and then the room. I am confused by her behavior and follow her to make sure she is better. She's facing the mantle in the living room and I can see her body shaking.

"Catnip." I try once more. She slowly turns around, her hand covering her mouth. Her eyes have tears in them.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want you seeing me like that." she says before finally letting herself cry. I approach her and pull her close to comfort her.

"It's not your fault."

"I thought I was done with that."

"Everyone has bad dreams."

"Not like mine." she quietly adds. I don't dare ask her what happened in her nightmare. That would be cruel to make her retell it. Instead, I lead her back to her room and help her back into bed before joining her. She takes my hand in hers and holds it close to her.

"Whatever happens, I'm right here." I whisper.

"Thank you, Gale." she whispers back with her eyes closed. I close my eyes and try to fall back to sleep.

That night, Katniss had two more spouts of bad dreams. Each time took me longer than the last to calm her down. I finally saw the trauma she faced from the Games and it was unsettling. It's not that I wasn't expecting it. I just never thought it would be this bad. I try to tell her that the worst is over, that no one can hurt her. This only seems to upset her more.

The next morning, I wake to find Katniss resting peacefully beside me. I can only imagine how tired she is. Her emotions were running high last night. I let her sleep, even though I know that doing so will only cause trouble for me. My mother will soon discover that I'm not in my bed and I will have some explaining to do. It's worth it though, having her close to me. I lower my lips and kiss her forehead to see how it feels to show her my affection. Even though she's still sleeping, I enjoy it. I could get used to this, laying next to her each night, her body close to mine. I then feel something else: guilt. A part of me feels as if I'm taking advantage of our friendship and her vulnerability to be close to her. After all, she has no idea about my romantic feelings for her. If she knew, there is no way she'd let me share a bed with her. There is no way she shares in my affection. She made that very clear last night. I let her sleep for a half hour more before gently nudging her to wake her. Her eyes open briefly and she grins as she shifts closer towards me.

"Time to wake up." I murmur sweetly.

"Just a few minutes more." she requests. I accept, of course. I feel bad when I have to wake her up 10 minutes later from a peaceful sleep.

"Catnip, I have to go." I whisper. "You can stay."

"I'll go with you." she says. We get out of bed and then make it like we do each morning. Today, she walks with me down the path in the Seam towards my home. We walk in silence until I start to talk about halfway through our journey.

"My mother is going to be mad."

"Why?"

"For sneaking out. She's awake by now."

"I'm sorry." she apologizes.

"It's not your fault. I'm the one who sneaks out every night."

"To see me." she finishes. I stop her.

"Don't you dare blame yourself."

"Gale, you wouldn't have to if I didn't have these stupid nightmares."

"I shouldn't have even let you go into that Arena." I say before starting to walk again.

"There was nothing you could have done."

"I should have taken you far away from here like I wanted to do." I comment. We are silent for the rest of the walk back. When we reach my house, Katniss takes my hand and leads me behind my house.

"We still could."

"Could what?" I ask, confused.

"Run away from District 12. Live in the woods."

"You'd want to, even now that you are a victor?"

"Even more so." she says with concern.

"There's something you're not telling me." I say. Her eyes avoid mine. "Whatever it is Katniss, spill."

"I thought I'd be safe." she says, sitting on the back steps.

"You are safe. You won. You can never go back there again." I say as I sit beside her.

"The Capitol didn't like my stunt with the berries. They think I did it to show them up."

"I thought you did it for him." I say. "That's what you said in the interviews. You were in love."

"It was a lie to save us and our families. Snow knows it wasn't real." she says with worry.

"So now what?"

"I have to be careful and keep up the act. If I don't our families could be in danger. I don't even want to think about what Snow would do."

"You'd really want to run?"

"Yes. We talked about it before I left. It's the only way to keep us safe."

"And you think your mother and Prim would be up for it?"

"I don't know."

"You could convince them…we could convince them. Tell them the alternative if you stay here. They'd have to say yes."

"What about your family?" she asks.

"I've already talked to my mother about it and she said we could if I really wanted to. I've been trading at the Hob, looking for the things we need. I have pretty much everything right now hiding under my bed." I tell her. She looks impressed. "Had to do something while you were away."

"What was it like here when I was gone?" she quietly asks me.

"Depressing."

"How?"

"It was just…hard not having you here." I tell her. It's as much as I elaborate for right now. "I better get inside, Katniss." I rise up and she does the same.

"Maybe I could come inside…say hello." she says with pleading eyes. I then remember she hasn't seen my family yet.

"I think they'd like that." I say with a smile. We walk up the back porch and let ourselves in. I close the door quite loudly, making my presence know. I hear my mother's footsteps from the kitchen as she begins to speak.

"Gale Hawthorne what have I told you—" She stops when she sees Katniss standing beside me. "Katniss." My mother rushes to her and hugs her tightly.

"Hazelle." Katniss says with joy.

"Look at you, back in District 12!" my mother exclaims.

"It's good to be back." she says with a smile.

"I knew you could do it. We all did."

"Thank you."

"Of course this one over here was a wreck." my mother jabs at me. I can feel my cheeks become red-hot with embarrassment.

"Mom!" I protest.

"It's true. Could barely watch you in the Arena." I understand what my mother is doing. This is because of me sneaking out. This is her way of getting back at me.

"It's hard for anyone to watch." I defend myself.

"So what were the two of you doing up so early. I would think hunting but you are hardly dressed for it."

"Gale's been staying with me at night at my house in the Seam."

"That's where he's been sneaking off to." my mother says with a sly smile. I can only hope she won't embarrass me further.

"Yes." Katniss confirms.

"He's a good friend to do so." my mother says. I know Katniss can't detect it but I can hear the sarcasm in her comment.

"He is." she says sincerely. My mother offers her to stay for breakfast but Katniss says she needs to get back. I show her out through the front door, offering her one last hug, which she willingly accepts. When I got back inside, my mother is waiting for me.

"You really think that a good idea?" she asks me.

"What, I'm just helping her out!"

"And where exactly are you when you are with her?"

"In her bed." I quietly tell her.

"You think that's fair?"

"She wants me there." I defend myself.

"She knows how you really feel?"

"No."

"I think it's time to let her go."

"Why?" I ask angered.

"She's not exactly available. You could get into a lot of trouble." she tells me. I guess she's right. Katniss is with Peeta now…or she is supposed to be. If I tried anything with her, I could cause all sorts of trouble in Panem.

"It's not even real, her and Peeta." I reveal. She looks shocked to know this piece of information. "She told me herself. She has to pretend to be with him so the Capitol won't think that she tried to defy them with the berries." My mother looks even more shocked.

"Even more reason to keep your distance. We wouldn't want people to get the wrong idea about the two of you."

"We want to run." I blurt out.

"Run?" she questions.

"We want to live in the woods, away from District 12. Not just us…our families too."

"Really?" my mother says with a skeptical look.

"She can't stay here, Mom. It's only a matter of time before Snow figures out it's not real between them. She says she wants to leave as soon as possible."

"How long do you think that would take?"

"I have almost everything. You said we could go."

"I did." she responds. "And what about her family?"

"She's going to tell them today."

"And if her mother says no?" my mom asks.

"She won't. She can't. Not after everything Katniss has been through. She'll make her understand."

"Well then I guess arrangements are in order. You have a plan?" she asks. We sit at the table and I tell her everything, my plan, the list of supplies I've obtained and other pertinent information. Now all I have left to do is hope that Katniss' family says yes.


The escape is coming soon! Don't forget to review and feel free to tell me things that you would like to happen once they are in the woods ;)