Ch 2 Half Truths

"Thane!" Kendy Idele caught sight of Thane as he approached the secure entrance to the hangar which was home to the Blue Squadron, also known as "Hunter Killers". No doubt, Thane would be scouring his X-Wing from top to bottom and front to back. He did this every day, whether he had taken flight in between or not.

"Thane!" Kendy called louder, and this time he paused to turn and saw Kendy waving and headed his way. He smiled and helped gap the distance in that long, confident stride that never seemed to falter.

"Kendy! What are you doing here? I thought you were…"

"Transferring? No. General Alpeteer is forming a task force to locate the hyperspace lanes the Imperials are using to hide their assets. As it so happens, this Rebel scumbag has skills to offer in that area." Kendy noticed Thane's chin drop slightly then he looked off to the side.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Kendy touched his forearm and, to her surprise, he shifted slightly away from her hand.

"Ouch!" Kendy grimaced.

"Oh, Kendy, no! I'm… I'm sorry. I was lost in thought there for a second."

"Thane, we've been through a lot. I've watched you go through some pretty strange – no offense – phases over the past few years. Have I ever made you think I'm someone you should not confide in?" Kendy slowly brought her hand back to barely touch his forearm, and this time Thane placed his hand over hers, squeezed softly, and allowed Kendy to remove her hand in her own time.

"It's…I saw Ciena yesterday." Kendy was confused at his lack of exuberance. Thane had been trying to see Ciena since the day she was taken into custody. He nearly grounded himself with uncharacteristic displays of anger born completely from desperation. Kendy knew this and counseled him off the cliff's edge more than once. So why wasn't he beaming? Where was the smile that could disarm a Rancor?

"That's wonderful! It is wonderful, right?" Kendy asked.

"Oh, yes. It was amazing to see her. I mean, the energy shield puts a silvery hue over things. I can't...you know, touch her." Thane felt the warm redness creep across his cheeks. He swallowed and grinned in embarrassment. "She's so beautiful. She looked frail, though. She's lost more weight and doesn't appear to be sleeping well. But, I felt like I had taken my first breath of air in months the second I saw her standing there smiling at me."

"So, can I ask what is bothering you? Clearly something is wrong."

"You mentioned the Hyperspace lanes. I think I've had too much time to think while out on missions. There are a few moments where I…"

"Go on, it's okay," Kendy gently encouraged him.

"There are a few times I have… I've felt anger that Ciena might know this information and is still clinging to it as the one string keeping her from being a traitor. She told me yesterday that she wasn't going to be a source of information to the New Republic. I was so excited to see her I didn't want to push, so I promised her I would never approach her on behalf of the New Republic. I intend to keep that promise, but..."

"Thane," Kendy started softly, "you have to be true to what you feel is right. You've been through an awful lot the past ten years. You've made some really bold, daring decisions. You defected from the Empire even though Ciena wouldn't break her oath and go with you, and then you joined the Rebellion. We all thought Ciena died on the Executor, and what did you do? Thane Kyrell - the most cynical guy I know - spent a year following the religious practices of Ciena's culture to mourn and honor her. And every choice you've made has been right."

Thane started to shake his head. Kendy reached for his hand and lightly held it. "It's true, and I think you know it. You became more patient and thoughtful as a friend. As a pilot and soldier you seemed to grow even more confident and consistent."

Thane spared his old friend a small smile.

"Thank you, Kendy. I'm not sure anything can help me work through my desperation to have Ciena with me. If I become confident she has information that could make this possible but won't share it, it will be like... like she is…"

"Choosing the Empire over you?" Kendy offered.

Thane looked up, startled to hear Kendy say the words he was feeling, and nodded.

Thane truly had been unwavering in his love for Ciena across all of the years the Empire had stood between them. When he believed she died, he wore a blue armband as a token of remembrance because Ciena mentioned the practice in a childhood conversation. And then there was the meditation, which was so out of character for him, yet he did it religiously because he remembered Ciena telling him that's how the Jelucan Valley folk do it. Kendy was right. Thane Kyrell - skeptic of all things he can't see, touch or feel himself - spent a year meditating alone while the other pilots celebrated the growing number of victories over the dying Empire.

Suddenly, the humiliation - along with unavoidable humor - seemed to hit Thane. He rolled his eyes when he realized how sincere Kendy had become and how uncomfortably serious he was behaving. He smiled and covered his face with his hands, then laughed out loud.

"You know, someone who was probably really wise said, 'The future is always in motion.' It was written on the refresher wall at our last base camp. I suppose that means I shouldn't worry so much."

Now Kendy laughed out loud - really loud - and had a hard time stopping. Thane's cheeks turned almost as red as the highlights in his hair. With a goofy sideways grin on his face, he protested.

"What? A profound statement can't be shared on a refresher wall? At least it gave me something to meditate on!"

"Thane! I hate to be the one to break it to you, but the wise person who says that is Luke Skywalker!" Thane's mouth fell open. "It's a Jedi belief! You are bonafide religious now!"

Thane was now laughing as hard as Kendy. "Tell me you're lying, Kendy Idele!"

"I swear it's true! He was constantly being asked if Jedi can see the future. I actually believe he can, for what it is worth." Thane opened his mouth to protest, but Kendy wouldn't give. "Evidently, when he is asked, he always replies with that phrase."

"Blast!" Thane yelled. "I've been unknowingly inspired by Jedi hocus pocus. And - gods kill me now - I meditated on it!"

"At least you can laugh about it!" Kendy exclaimed.

Kendy couldn't have been happier. She loved to hear Thane laugh. She loved everything about her long time friend.

The rising noise of buzzing, whirring and pounding coming from the hangar were calling to Thane. "I have to go, but since you'll be sticking around, maybe you could find some opportunities to visit Ciena. I know you'd be a great comfort to her, and it might do you both some good to talk about, well…June." Kendy nodded and turned to head back up the trail to the Interior Operations building.

She stopped and turned to see Thane's back was to her as he trotted toward the hangar. Hoping for one more glance back, she yelled, "I'll definitely do that, Thane! Count on it!"

Kendy knew exactly how Thane felt being separated from Ciena. She understood the burning, oozing ache of unfulfilled desire. Her greatest dilemma was how far she would be willing to go to turn things to her favor. What she didn't tell Thane was that she had lobbied hard to obtain a spot on General Alpeteer's task force. She had also recommended a certain pilot with the exceptional skill and instincts that lent to remaining in the shadows and, when necessary, performing risky reconnoiter work and deriving the most complete material for the effort. Thane would be finding out about his new assignment sometime today.

Each of these actions were based soundly on accurate information that best served the New Republic. But, only Kendy knew there was another reason for her actions. She, like Thane, had found the Jedi principle, "The future is always in motion," to have profound meaning in her life. The future needed to shift, and Kendy would do everything in her power to make certain it shifted her way.