Chapter 1: Culpability

Carlos and TK had been taken to the hospital by ambulance after Sadie had put Oxy in the pho to make sure they were okay. The doctors examined them and gave them some tests.

After some recommendations of the doctors, the two lovers were free to leave and their health condition did not require a night in hospital for observation. Gabriel had come himself to seek them while Owen tidied up and cleaned the loft while making sure that the police had recovered all that could contain Oxy before returning at his place. The drive was very quiet and each of them was lost in their own thoughts.

When they arrived at the loft, TK got out of the car, gently thanked his father-in-law and waved before going home. He was not well and he also wanted to leave his boyfriend for a while with his father. Carlos also got out of the vehicle and was joined by the sheriff.

"Thanks dad for being there for us again tonight."

That was all Carlos had managed to say to him. It had to be said that the relationship with his father was close and that to express his feelings was complicated.

"Good evening Carlitos and take care of your boy. I think he will need it."

"Sure."

His father put a hand behind his neck to guide his head onto his shoulder. Carlos closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying the awkward embrace. He took the opportunity to put his arms around his dad. However, Carlos did not expect his father to put his other arm behind his back. Even if Gabriel was not demonstrative, his son had been again in danger and he could have lost him again. It was Gabriel who let go first and then went home while Carlos joined TK. The two boys went to bed, snuggling up to each other.

TK had trouble sleeping, everything was racing through his head. This evening had turned him upside down and he still felt a part of guilt. It is at this moment that his stomach agitated. He got up and ran to the bathroom to vomit. When he finished and flushed the toilet, he sat down on the floor against the wall, pulled his legs up against him and started to cry.

Meanwhile, Carlos had turned over in his bed and felt that the seat next to him was empty. In a fit of panic and concern for TK, he got up. He went to the only lighted room where he heard sobbing. He walked into the bathroom and what he saw broke his heart.

He slowly approached TK and crouched down in front of him. He took him in his arms, one hand behind his head and the other behind his back. T.K. put his hands behind his back and let himself go. Carlos rocked him, not saying a word. T.K. finally calmed down a few minutes later and let go of his lover's arms. He wiped his tears and said:

"I'm sorry my love..."

Carlos put his hands on his arms and asked him:

"Why are you sorry?"

T.K. lowered his head, he didn't dare to look his man straight in the eyes. He felt very bad, racked with guilt.

"I'm sorry...I... I shouldn't have let Sadie cook the pho... My sobriety... It's all my fault..."

Feeling T.K on the verge of a panic attack, Carlos picked him up in his arms.

"Baby, it's not your fault. It's not your fault, no one knew who that woman really was. No one could have predicted what she was going to do. Nothing will change your sobriety. You didn't take the drug, it was administered to you without your knowledge."

Carlos pulled T.K. from his arms and grabbed his face so his boyfriend could look him straight in the eye:

"Don't make yourself sick over this my love. You'll fight like a king and I'll help you. I will be by your side every step of the way. I won't abandon you and I won't let you go. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I will give you mine. If you need my arms to support you then I will support you and carry you. If you need to talk, I will lend you my ear to listen. I will stand by you no matter what, we will face it together. Your obstacles will be mine. You will get through this, I promise. You are the strongest and bravest person I know because you are a resilient person."

As if to back up his words, he kissed T.K on the cheek:

"I love you and my love for you will never change."

"I love you too."

T.K. felt reassured, he knew Carlos was right. Carlos got up, took T.K.'s hand and walked him back to bed. T.K. snuggled into the policeman's strong and powerful arms, feeling comforted, warm and safe.