Spider-Man leapt over one thug, sticking the gangster's hands together with a quick firing of his webs. Landing in front of him, Spider-Man couldn't help but say, "Aw, for me?" as he plucked the weapons out of the thugs' restrained hands.

"Hey! Give those back!" The robber yelled as Spider-Man swung to the next criminal.

"Yeah, sure. Like I'm just gonna hand over a bunch of weapons to a guy that just tried to brain me."

"Bastard!"

"Hey! My parents were happily married when they had me! Thank you very much." Spider-Man said, as he took down the next couple of guys.

"Aw, I can just imagine baby Spidey playing Superhero, getting ready for the real thing. Walking around going, chu, chu." Deadpool said, gently chooing the last part, while shooting the criminals in the knees and shoulders. Keeping to his and Spider-Man's agreement. No killing anyone when they work together.

"Can you two focus." Cable said irritably, as he followed Deadpool's lead.

No one could say no to Spider-Man.

"We are focusing, can't you see?" Deadpool said, right as Spider-Man went to shoot more webs at another guy, and yank the weapons out of his hands. Only to find his web canisters had run out.

Spidey looked around for anything to use as a weapon, when his eyes landed on Wade. He reached forward, and grabbed one of Deadpool's many guns off of him.

Wade turned to him, having felt someone go for one of his guns. He had a moment of satisfaction, holding his hands in front of his mouth, as he said to himself. "Spider-Man. Spidey is about to shoot my gun."

Spider-Man takes the gun in his hands, and gets a good grip. Then he proceeds to yell, "YEET!" as he throws it at one of the bad guys.

"Wait, what?" Wade said, puzzled, giving himself a little shake.

However there was one thing that he didn't take into account. The safety was off.

The gun hit the masked robber's head, and there was a loud bang. For a split second Spider-man was terrified that he had accidentally shot someone. When the sceam hit him.

He turned to find Wade on the floor, in the fetal position, hands guarding his crotch. He banged his head on the floor a couple times, as he screamed, "You shot me in the dick!"

Spidey eyes widened, as he rushed to Wade's side. Apologies spilling out of him faster than he can take a breath. All of his attention was on Deadpool, not on the last couple criminals, nor on Cable who was laughing so hard he was wheezing in the background.

Just as Spider-Man knelt down and was about to fuss over Wade, his Spidey-Senses went off.

"I sense a faint smell of danger." Spidey thought to himself.

He turned his head, and looked to where he knew it was coming from, to see the barrel of a gun two inches from his face.

It seemed to happen in slow motion. The masked criminal bagan to pull the trigger back. Spider-Man's mind was in a frenzy. "What do I do?" "Am I going to die?!" "I don't want to do anything that would put the other guy's life in danger." "I'm too young to die!"

And then it was over. And there were two screaming men on the floor.

"No!" Deadpool yelled from his curled up position on the floor. Pointing one of his katanas with a fresh coat of blood on it, at the vagrant. "My Spidey!"

Spider-Man stood, slightly baffled at the turn of events. Just a moment ago he was about to meet his maker. Now, he's a little confused. He doesn't like this feeling.

But, one must expect, and get used to it when they hang out with Deadpool.

Deadpool was finally able to pick himself off the floor, and with Spider-Man and Cable, finish off the last of the robbers, and hand them over to the police.

About half an hour later, Deadpool and Spider-Man sat on a rooftop looking over the city.

"Hey Spider-Man." Deadpool said. Peter looked away from the glittering lights of the city that never sleeps, and turned toward the man sitting next to him. Concerned about the oddly serious tone coming from the usually least serious man. Only to be met with a sudden and brief sharp pain on his forehead. Rubbing the offending area, he looked at the man in red and black.

"What was that for?"

"For almost dying on me! You sat there like an idiot, and didn't even think to move out of the way! I thought you had Spidey-Sense, to tell you when danger was imminent?"

"Just because I have Spidey-Sense, doesn't mean I have Common Sense."

The two of them stared angrily and stubbornly at each other for a long moment, before turning away. Spider-Man stood up, and stretched.

"Where are you going?"

"I have to go back home now. Have to wake up early in the morning."

"Okay," Deadpool stood as well and made to leave for his own apartment. Wade looks over his shoulder and says, "Same time next week?"

"Sure." Spider-Man says, before leaping off the building and heading back to his apartment.

Deadpool slightly sags in relief, as he let the breath he was holding go. Happy that he hadn't chased off his only real, solid friend.

"Okay stop. No more being sad." Wade said, "Let's just do a time skip to next week when Spidey and I meet up next, and let's go from there. Okay?"

!

After another patrol, and more baddies were beaten up and taken to jail, Spider-Man and Deadpool could be found sitting on the rooftop that has become their rooftop over the last few months.

"Hey Deadpool?" Spider-Man asks. Wade gives a hum in reply. "If I cut off your head, will your body regrow your head, or will you grow a new body?"

There was a beat of silence before Deadpool answered slowly, "I don't know."

He then jumped up, pulled out one of his katanas, held it out for Spider-Man to take and said, "Cut off my head and find out."

"Will that hurt?" Spider-Man asked.

"Oh it's gonna hurt like a b****, but..." Deadpool trailed off, then turned away from Spidey to face the air next to him. "Really? Bleeps? Here?"

Rolling his eyes he turned back to Spider-Man. How he managed to show that he was rolling his eyes through his mask, I have no idea. "Anyway, it's gonna hurt like a bitch, but we're doing this for SCIENCE!"

He then hands his katana to Peter, who stands there holding the blade hesitantly.

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yes. Now come on. Do it."

Lifting it up above his head, as he prepared to bring it down on his friend's neck. He stood there, frozen for a moment as his principles and the need to know, because SCIENCE, waged within him.

Finally the blade dropped. The handle lay limply in his hands.

"I can't." Peter said, breathlessly. "I can't do it."

Before anything more could be said, Spider-Man felt the katana being gently pulled from his grasp. Looking up, expecting it to be Wade, telling him it was okay. He was therefore shocked and surprised to see Hawkeye holding the sword.

With one clean swipe Deadpool's head was rolling on the roof a few feet away from his body.

Peter looked from Deadpool's decapitated body to Clint as he walked to the edge of the roof. Spider-Man could just make out "SCIENCE!", as Clint ziplined away.

And so, Peter was left staring dumbly at Wade's limp body, and his fully animated head.

"Did… did he just touch my katana?" Wade asked from his place on the ground. His cheek pressed against the gravel. He tried to turn his head around, but when that failed he tried to use what was left of his neck to get his head to hop. That didn't work either. He finally decided to just use his chin to turn what was left of himself. "Where did that purple pointy bastard go?"

Spider-Man would have laughed if he didn't fear he'd throw up if he opened his mouth.

"No one touches Bea without my permission! Where did he put her?!"

Spider-Man, still unable to speak, just pointed over at where the sword was left.

Deadpool gasped. Only it sounded more like gurgling. He started to drag himself toward his precious Bea. "He just tossed her on the ground?! Don't worry Bea I'm coming! And I'm gonna sharpen and polish you three times before going to bed tonight!"

"Spidey, I really appreciate it, but my Bea needs me."

Spider-Man swallowed thickly a couple times before he's able to say, "Um, Deadpool. I'm over here."

Wade looked over at him, "Then what… Ahah! Spidey come look! I would regrow my body! Yeah!"

Spidey walked over, "Fascinating… what-" Spider-Man stopped.

"What?"

"Oh no."

"What?! What is it?"

"I-I-I…look!" and then very quickly, before he could rethink it, he picked up Deadpool's head and turned it to look at his body on the ground.

"What? I don't- Oh… Well, fuck."

As they watched they could visibly watch as Deadpool's body and head (through the nearby window for Wade) both regenerated. The head regrew a body, and the body regrew a head.

"What do we do?" Deadpool asked.

"Why are you asking me?!"

"You're the science person! Besides, you started this!"

"Well you're the one who said to actually do it! I was just theorizing!"

"Well how was I supposed to know! You've got more luck getting the author to understand either of our minds, than to actually answer us!"

"What?!"

They continued arguing and bickering for a few minutes, before a portal that resembled a small nebula opened next to them. Surprising both of them. Causing Peter to drop Wade's head.

"Ow!"

"Sorry."

An impossibly tall and imposing bald man, with white eyes dressed in a deep blue robe stepped through the nebula, picked Wade's head off the ground, and left.

Not a word was spoken. Just the whistling of the wind, and the sound of mending skin and bone as Deadpool's body finished regrowing its head.

Deadpool sat up, blinked his eyes open, and looked around in confusion. As soon as his eyes alighted on Peter, his whole face lit up. Spider-Man smiled slightly, glad that his friend was alright, and things could go back to normal.

"Mama!"

"Ah, fudgecakes!"