writing this on notepad to keep all the stink WARNING:
hello this is my first attempt at writing plz be nice and use constructive critism warning: family guy type of humor,spelling errors all characters belong to their respective owners this is an AU so this is why you'll see like,uh,headcanon esque stuff and shippy stuff(hell this au is kinda held by duct tape as i just tooked other ppl headcanons that i liked;my own headcanon,a lil bit of youtube comedy and just blended it in a blender)
also its heavily due to fnf that im doing this,uh say what you want but uh i dont play the game im just here for the music so the characters iterations here would be more fnf based also i have a limited knowledge in sonic stuff so if there is something wrong plz tell me and if you say its cringe well fuck you there are ppl my immortal exist on this damn site

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PAGE 1:

welcome to the place where fictional characters exist like,uh,idk old school parody style and lemme tell ya a story *ahem*
as we all know,things havent been bright for indie horror games characters,as these kind of games become less and less scary as time goes on,sames goes for creepypastas,things became more and more kind of lame as both of them either struggle to find a job or try to be taken seriously.A tension is also present between everyone of those characters as one will wait the moment the other's game to fail or the moment their creator start doing shitty things to just mock them or harass ,it aint easy being spooky,and when reading this,you will never see your favorite indie horror games characters the same ever in a 'childhood destruction' style.
and today we will see what one of them has been up to lately

someone that you all know as both a creepypasta AND an indie horror game character,but was doomed right the moment he started existing.

-epik narative transition-
we are now in an appartement,its not a bad one no no quite a nice one but it is still an appartement,and here in the living room we can see on the white couch a strange tall fellow,he kinda look like a morbidly tall sonic with purple crystals in his quills,a scar in the form of an X (that look more like a K im sorry) on his chest,and instead of eyes,he had darkened pits with only two red glowing thingies that prove that he atleast can see,
and a strange fushia-ish liquid is leaking out of might not reconise him at first,but those eyes cant lie because it is none only than the one,the only,the,uh,legendary, ,but lets just call him Xenophane because,quite a lot has changed for him.
The tall hedgehog is laying on the couch,watching TV,he didnt felt like doing anything today no torturing vistims today,no evil and demonic stuff (he was still,no matter how meta this universe is,the evil spooky sonic),just trying to chill.
"Ugh,there's nothing interesting on TV today" he said as he was zapping heard a knock on the door,he lazily woke up and opened it,a small doll looking like tails the fox was standing there,its none other than tails doll.
"Heyyy Xeno!how's going?" said the doll "TD,buddy! been a while since i saw you" Xenophane answered "well its only been 1 week but yeah glad to see to see you again!"
tails doll was a good friend of Xenophane,they both met back in 2011-2012,at the time where creepypastas where at their highest point,since then they hang out together quite a lot.
Xenophane let Tails doll enter in the living room,then Xeno sat again on the couch,he then ask "so remind me what was up with that absence you had all week?"
tails doll said "oh i was just busy the whoke week with the job, was trying another one of his plan to take over mobius,
spoiler alert,it didnt ended well but hey,for once he gave me an interesting thing to do for once other than just check the cameras of the base,supervising the place security and all that boring schtick"
the evil hog said "heh,so who like,screwed the plan this time?did sonic beat him or did something went wrong?"
"oh well do you know grounder?you know, that one green robot?well dumbass forgot to,like,go buy the screws and after a whole week of working on the machine,right the moment touched it,it just collapsed."
Xenophane had a laugh,i mean it do sound funny,TD then looked at Xenophane and asked:"and what about you?anything new lately or?",Xenophane looked at them and said "eh,actually not much,things are pretty calm lately even tho i feel that my soul slaves are planning on escaping again but that wont be hard to handle." TD said :"not even an interesting thing?" Xenophane was thinking a bit then said "i dont know anymore" he then layed down on the couch Doll then asked :"now that i think about it,what do you usually do expect torturing soul at your realm or sitting on the couch?" Xenophane said:"well,sometime i babysit my little brother,like right now and other time i try to get into a fight and-" Tails Doll : "well i was more talking about productive stuff,when was the last time you had a job?"
Xenophane stoped looking at the TV,had a small grim expression and then answered "well,you know,many years ago,before my crystalisation"
tails doll asked :"you havent tried looking for a job?" Xenophane then said: "i dont think i need a job im litterally a crystal god of death why would i need that?" tails doll said "well atleast you'll feel usefull to society heh" Xenophane tooked that a bit as an insult "hey if this job isnt something like being worshipped by a cult i dont care" tails doll then looked concerned and told him "look Xenophane,im getting worried about your situation okay?i know your like,a powerfull guy and all but your litterally a bad creepypasta AND indie horror game character,people dont take you really seriously,you got fired by both groups,got a depresion and you may still have it as we speak right now"
Xenophane: "what the fuck your talking about buddy,my situation's great,amazing even!"
tails doll deadpanned looked a him and said :
"Bro,your are litterally living at your parent's house,if that aint bottom of the barrel then i dont know what is"
Xenophane was about to say something but,they where right,he was indeed in a lousy situation.
"so what do you propose?" said Xenophane,tails doll then said "well maybe you should ,like,get a job first?"
"BUT WHAT JOB?! im litterally evil sonic the hedgehog and hell even like that people say that i suck at that!"
tails doll then tooked a random newspaper that was sitting there and said"well,maybe find something that is not,like,out of your league"
xenophane " huh,well uh i'll think of it later" he stood up and went quickly to the kitchen to eat something,on his way to the fridge there is a little hedgehog with noodle arms eating a bowl of cereal,the little hedgehog noticed Xenophane's presense and waved at him Xenophane: "oh uh sup sunky" sunky was still looking at him ,xenophane looked at him again and said:" what?"
sunky asked: "do u wanna play v1dya game with me?" xenophane just said: "uh no sunky i can't im pretty busy today" sunky just looked at him and said "doing what?you where laying on da couch like a potato all day,h4ve you becomed a potato?" xenophane kinda had a laugh at sunky's childish remark but didnt answer his little brother's he was right,xenophane have been sitting on the couch for like,the whole day he was making himself a sandwitch he was wondering what type of job would suit him more,maybe one of those executor that you see at the dark ages,or maybe a hitman,anything will do as long as its about murder since he's still an edgy he got done with the sandwitch tails doll ran up in the kitchen "XENO I HAVE GOOD NEW FOR YOU! -oh hey sunky how's going?" they patted sunky's head,sunky answered with a thumb up.
Xenophane said :"really?what kind of good new?" TD showed him the newspaper" check this out",xenophane read "win this context to win the prise of an oversized spoo-" TD interrupted him "NOT THAT METH BRAIN THIS" they pointed at an announcement,xenophane read "Help Wanted: freddy fazbear's pizzaria now hiring new staff member,120 dollars the day and employes get free fo-" he then stopped himself "no,nooo,noope,i will not be working at godamn freddy fazbear's godamn's pizzaria for pete's ".TD then said "why?its a good start no?just a simple job" then Xenophane said "look i would be willing to work at any pizzaria,but not this one."
tails doll then realised "is it because of,like,the argument that got you fired from the indie horror games assosiation?and the fact that right after thhat freddy's the one responsible for sending you death threats for a whole month?or the fact th-" Xenophane scream "SO DO YOU GET IT?" tails doll said" well yes but this is now all in the past,things may have changed!maybe nobody hate you like that anymore,maybe they just accepted the fact that its not your fault your origin material is,uh, hell!look at how much YOU changed since then!you have now sick ass crystal related power and a sick ass scar!" Tails doll then put his hand on Xenophane shoulder (but like in that buzzlightyear toystory meme,the one that say "alien,alien everywhere") and then said : "you need to show the world the new you"
Xenophane was hesitent about that "and what if the world's still a dick and isnt ready for my epicness?"
tails doll then looked at him straight in the eyes and said:"if you dont wanna do it for yourself do it for your dignity" then sunky said "and the pizza!" tails doll aggred "yes that right do it for your dignity and in the name of pizza"
xenophane just got quiet for a moment then said:" okay fine i'll try,just to show the world my new acquired greatness!...but uh im supposed to babysit sunky and there is only us 3 here and..."
sunky then said "actually we are 4,fleetway is also here",xenophane just let a long sigh,he'll have to do something he didnt wanted to,asking fleetway to babysit sunky.
he went to a random room and walked toward the yellow super hedgehog with red crazy spiraling said "oh hey there crystal ass suprised you even got up of that couch",xenophane replied "whatever cheese shit,listen i need you to take care of the little shit for the day" fleetway replied "hold on,isnt that your fucking job?" xenophane looked at him saying "well not today because i'll be getting a real job so you'll take care of that right now" fleetway laughed and said "HAHAHA well god fucking luck trying not to get fired then!" xenophane was used to this from fleetway's part so he just said "so your atleast gonna take care of sunky right?"
fleetway said:"whatever,yeah sure i'll take care of cereal eater" xenophane then said :"good and you better be good at this shit cuz if something happen to sunky,i'll take the blame on you shitface,got it?" fleetway:"yeah yeah yeah sure"
xenophane then went out of the room then said :"Okay problem fixed,sunky if something happen to you tell em its fleetway's fault got it?" sunky nodeed then waddled toward the couch to watch tv.
tails doll then looked at Xenophane and said:"so,we good to go?" Xenophane gave them a smile and said:"well fuck yeah we good" and they both leaved the appartement,to the pizza place,leaving sunky with fleetway.

ofc things may turn to shit soon idk

end of part 1

shoutout to OsamaGaming12