The Principal Willaby Chronicles
It was a dark day in retroville. The sky was purple, the air was green and full of powerplant air, and lighting was shocking everywhere. Principal willaby was eating the corpse of a dead baby bop from barney, his face covered in infant dinosaur blood. A minion from despicable me walked over and said a stupid banana joke. Willaby stabbed the minion through the top of its skull, into the inside of its brain, with a drill tool. The minion gargled with blood spewing out from its mouth and nose. Willaby ate the minion alive.
Principal willaby then drove out to the retroville school to do his job. He hated his job, he hated his school, he hated the teachers, and most of all, he hated the snot nosed students he had to deal with. He wanted to fucking kill those stupid fucking kids.
Willaby was in his office, using a swiff army knife to slowly cut the skin off a baby pokemon he captured. The pokemon cried and squealed stupid shit as willaby told it to shut the fuck up and let him keep peeling its skin off. The baby pokemon at this point was showing its inner flesh from head to toe around its body. Miss fowl was peeking through a crack in the door to see willaby being evil. Miss fowl was sickened. She knew what she had to do.
Miss fowl went to her class and gave a lecture about the evils of principal willaby. She said he was a bully who had nothing but hate in his heart. She claimed willaby needed to be stopped and killed for good. She sent her students out to war to assassinate principal willaby.
Principal willaby, now just about to devour the skinless baby pokemon, saw cindy vortex storm through his door. She was holding a shotgunand shouted she was about to end the nightmare on society that is principal willaby's undeserved life. Willaby raised an eyebrow with a disapproving look on his face. Then he got a massive rocket launcher-machine gun hybrid turret out of his pocket. Willaby shot rockets and machinegun fire at cindy, blowing her to bits and pieces and smitherines. Libby and timmy turner were near by holding assault rifles. Willaby ran towards them like a Naruto ninja, and used his pocket knife to slash their necks, instantly beheading them. Willaby left the area to face that conniving bitch miss fowl.
Miss fowl 'laid an egg,' and by that what we mean is she took a massive shit dump inside of a nest. Willaby entered her classroom and challenged her to a fight. Miss fowl did her usual weirdo chicken squawk, then threw the poop she laid at principal willaby as if she was a monkey. Willaby ate the poop off his face and said it was yummy! But then, willaby got serious and told miss fowl no more games. He wasn't playing around anymore. Willaby shoved a chainsaw up miss fowl's cooch, and she was sawed in half. Her last words was chicken-like squawking. Willaby licked miss fowl's blood and guts off his chainsaw.
Adam lyon and jake spidermonkey were flinging shit at each other, since they loved to play monkey games. Willaby decided now was the time to play some games. He wanted to play some fun games with adam and jake. Willaby took a shit on miss fowl's DVD copy of "To Boldly Flee" he stole from her classroom. Willaby pointed at the poopy DVD and said 'look! Poop!' adam and jake immediately came over to the poopy movie and began to devour willaby's manure. Willaby shrugged and joking quipped that this is probably the only real use a channel awesome movie will ever have. A funny drum sound followed by laugh track is heard from out of nowhere.
After taking his poop on doug walker's magnum opus, principal willaby found a magic portal on a locker. Out from the portal came in rolie polie olie, to scold willaby for being a big bully. Olie said that he wasn't fond of willaby bullying people for fun. Willaby said bullying is good and cool, and bullying separates the weak from the strong. Willaby then asked olie how he'd know about bullying anyways since he's a robot and robots don't have souls. This sick burn made olie cry like a little bitch, and he ran around bawling his robotic eyes out, pouring oil all over the floor.
Out of the same portal, in came the robot baby twins coochie and coo, who somehow wondered their way through the portal since olie was a lazy fuck and left it open in his world. Willaby wasted no time taking care of these stupid babies. He took coochie in his hands and immediately tore his teeth into the flesh of her face like a wild animal. Roaring and growling willaby's teeth quickly got covered in oil as coochie squealed robotic cries. Willaby tore her face off, leaving a flat surface of metal and electricity that was once coochie's face. Coo tried to crawl away, but willaby took coo to the bathroom where there was a bath tub. Willaby dunked coo into the bath tub and coo was electrocuted since he is a robot and thus cannot handle water, at least in the human world, its hard to know how the world of rolie polie olie works with water and bathing. Coo could only handle so much water before he exploded into metal and gears. Willaby laughed, and with electricity still flowing in the bath tub he knew he had to quickly take advantage of this opportunity before it was too late. He saw toadette walking down the school hallways and immediately grabbed and ran away with her screaming in his arms. Willaby dunked toadette into the bath tub, and she was instantly electrocuted by the remains of coo as she screamed while being shocked by the electricity and lightning. Toadette's mushroom-headed brains exploded, blood and fungus covering the bathroom walls. Willaby licked this stuff off the dirty and filthy school bath room walls, saying it tasted like mushrooms.
Willaby set up a bomb in one of the lockers of the retroville-school. He drove off in his car, and he pressed his button to set off his alarm. The entire retroville-school exploded, as everyone within the building died horribly. Once again principal willaby had a fun day.
