Author's Note: The following chapter contains self harm, slavery, and abuse.
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Vissna woke up coughing, gaging, gasping.. lungs burning. Her vision slowly returned. She could make out the shiny metal frame of the Mandalorian. When she was sure she could breathe again properly, she looked frantically around the room for that cyborg girl.
"She's gone," Vissna heard the Mandalorian say. She looked up at him holding her aching head in one hand and her heaving chest in the other. "No," he said, "I didn't kill her. But she won't harm you again. I promise you." If Vissna wasn't so exhausted she might have smiled at that. She would give anything to see the Mandalorian threaten that girl right now.
Din watched as the beautiful woman he had just rescued struggled to breathe. He kneeled over her, wrapping her into a towel. Her lips and fingers were blue, but color slowly returned to them. Her face looked more pink and less pale, less like death. Last night, he might have wished this upon her, but seeing it happen filled him with anger and guilt. Especially since he wasn't the one putting her life in jeopardy.
"Why did you do that?" Din asked. Vissna shook her head from side to side, she wasn't understanding. Din grabbed a fist full of her hair and pulled, bringing her face closer to him. "Why did you do that?!" He growled.
Vissna whimpered at the fresh pain he elicited. "I d-don't-," her voice raspy and quiet.
"I watched you. You didn't fight back. You just let it happen!" Din was surprised by his own fury. "I know you. You could have taken her."
Vissna was thrilled by his anger. "You don't know me," she whispered.
"I know you're better than that. Better than allowing death to claim you. How can I depend on you in a fight if I have to worry about you throwing yourself into blaster fire?" There were so many new complications that he found came with this woman. Had he known this is what would have come of that bounty, he never in a million years would have accepted. He feared, now that he knew her, it was too late to give her away. It would certainly be easier just to drop her off with Bo Katan and call it a day. But he couldn't.
"So this is about trust and our bargain?" She asked softly. She had proved he was ready and willing to protect her. Would he die for her? Not yet.
"This is about not killing yourself." He argued.
"I didn't kill myself. I simply chose not to f-fight back. I never thought I would be this f-freezing in Tatooine." Vissna shivered, curling into a ball on her side.
Din removed his gloves and set them aside. He took her ice cold hands into his, rubbing and warming them. An 'mmm' escaped from Vissna's lips as she closed her eyes and imagined the warm suns of Tatooine on her, caressing her cold skin. She started working her fingers around Din's hands, savoring the rough feeling. She wondered how good those rough hands would feel on her more sensitive areas. Din dropped Vissna's hands, realizing the gesture became much more intimate then he had originally anticipated. When he dropped her hands, he found he instantly missed them.
"D-don't stop," Vissna breathed, her teeth still chattering.
Din swallowed, putting down the glove that almost made its way back onto his hand. He took her freezing curled toes into his hands and rubbed them. This wasn't doing much. He needed to get her warmer more quickly before she started turning blue again. He tightened the towel around her and pulled her into his arms, then he reached for his gloves and laid them on top of her, "hold these for me." Vissna moaned and he figured that meant yes.
He carried her across the bath house and out into the palace. "I haven't been this cold since my last trip into space. Space is so cold." She shivered. Din sighed, now she was rambling. He had a couple flights of stairs to still carry her up. Even after a near death experience he couldn't get her to shut up. "Your armor is so cold." She said, nuzzling into his shiny metal chestplate.
"I'm not taking that off." He said.
"Mmmm but it would make me so warm." She teased.
/
In Vissna's bedroom, Din wrapped her up in her blankets on her bed. "Your clothes aren't dry yet. I'll ask Fennec if she has some." He told her while he tucked her in.
"I get to wear clothes previously on Fennec's body? Very nice!" Vissna smiled.
While Din wasn't exactly thrilled with Vissna, a small bit of him was content that her sense of humor returned. He wanted to ask her about her past relationship with Fennec but now wasn't the time.
"Your thoughts betray you… It was The Outlander Club, years ago," Vissna said, rolling over to face Din, "we both had too much wine. I swear mine was laced with something. Death Stick maybe? Fennec and I hit it off right away. Until I got sick and passed out behind the club. Fennec kicked the exhaust ports off a few pigs trying to take advantage of the situation. Then I woke up a very happy girl in Fennec's room. I stayed in her bed for three nights until we both had to leave. I like to think I prolonged her visit on Coruscant." Vissna finished her story seeming very proud of herself.
"But you don't want her now?" Din asked.
"Hmm? Mandalorian, I always want Fennec Shand. Are you jealous?" She grinned.
"Din," he replied.
"What's a Din?" She asked and he smiled beneath his helmet.
"I am. You called me Mandalorian. My name is Din Djarin." Saying it to her made him blush.
"No it's not." Vissna said, shaking her head angrily and shooting up from the bed, the blankets falling around her ankles on the floor.
"Yes. It is. Din Djarin. That's what everyone calls me here, so you can too."
"No! It's not!" She yelled.
"Why are you yelling?" He lifted his arms out in front of him.
"Tell me it's not! Tell me you're lying!" Vissna screamed.
Din didn't know what to say. "Okay, you can call me Mandalorian, if you really want," he sighed.
"No!" She screamed again. She was crying now. Vissna's cheeks gleamed with a trail of tears. Din was utterly confused, but still held out his ungloved hand to brush the tears from her face. She swatted it away. "Don't touch me!" She started crying faster, her breaths shortening. She shut her eyes hard and clenched her jaw so hard it hurt, "Ugh! Why! Why did you do it? Why did you tell me? You ruined everything!" There was no way she couldn't kill him now, she would have no choice.
Din grabbed both her wrists, "you're not making any sense!" She pulled her arms but his grasp on her only tightened. She wiggled and struggled away, so he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her naked squirming body against him. "You have to calm down!" That only made her thrash against him harder. Why did his touch feel so good? She pushed him back and held him up at arm's length just over the ground using The Force. Din had his blaster in his hand a second later, aimed at her face. "I'll do it." He threatened her.
"You were part of some kind of gang of mercenaries, no? With a couple of Twi'leks? One was your girlfriend?" Vissna seemed to have calmed from her initial rage but wasn't letting Din go. She needed to hear it from him.
"Yes, why?" He said lowering his blaster.
She stared at him for a while. This could still work to her advantage. She could still keep him close, have his loyalty. After all, she had been waiting for someone like him. "As a kid, I was given to a group of mercenaries who sold me into slavery. There was a Mandalorian among them. With your fancy new armor I didn't even recognize you." Vissna squeezed and Din choked. "When I saw him, I had hope. I was a Mandalorian too after all. Born a child of Mandalore, or whatever's left of it. Do you remember?"
Din nodded. He did. He remembered her. He could see it now. Within her big brown almond shaped eyes, he could see that little girl that he let down years ago. Vissna released him, but kept her hand out, as to ensure he wouldn't come any closer.
"What did I say?" She asked.
"I was young then too," Din exhaled. His heart, breaking for her.
"What. Did. I. Say." She demanded.
There was a pause in which the tension sat thick in the air between them before he answered, "You told me," he began, thinking back to the day. Space is so cold. He remembered her saying. She was a really cute kid too. He remembered being hardened after that day to the world. He remembered her little finger pointing up at his helmet. "You told me, you're a Mandalorian too, royalty, and that you'd give me anything I wanted if I helped you. That in another life we could have been together."
"Then your girlfriend came," Vissna said impatiently finishing the story, "she called you by your name, Din Djarin, and told me you'd never help me. Because 'princesses' don't always get a happy ending." Vissna's tears stopped coming but her eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks still stained with their moisture.
"I'm sorry," was all Din could say. Now that he knew, he couldn't unsee it. The kid he hurt inside her.
"I'm sorry? I'm sorry for condemning you to a life of slavery?" Vissna's eyes were wide with hatred.
"I thought about you." He admitted.
"Oh, I thought about you too." Vissna said almost laughing, "Every day as a slave, every obstacle I'd overcome, every hardship I've endured, every lesson my Master taught me that I thought would break me, I thought about the Mandalorian named Din Djarin that I'd kill if I ever saw again!" Her outstretched hand twitched, but nothing happened. "You know, some say it's easier to kill a man when his face is hidden. It's like you're killing a suit of armor and not a real person. I like to remove their helmets. So I can admire my work. So that I may see all hope drain from their eyes as I squeeze." All she had to do was squeeze. The amount of guilt in the room could literally kill him. But She didn't.
"I thought about you. After that day. I thought about you. And how I let you down. Years later, I took on a bounty. It turned out to be a little kid. I thought about you. And I couldn't go through with it." Din slowly reached for her outstretched hand and she softened, allowing him to take it. He took her hand in his and stepped closer to her, closing the space between them. He ran her hand up his neck, and up into his helmet, across his scruffy cheek. Vissna gasped. She pulled back her hand quickly, examining it, there was a tear on her fingers. A fresh tear ran down her own face as she watched Din's tear run down her palm.
She stumbled back onto the bed, her fist closed around his tear. "Leave me," she whispered, not looking at him. When he didn't move, she pointed to the door and screamed, "Leave!"
Din took a step back, nodded, and walked out of the room.
Vissna fell to the floor, defeated. Din. The Din Djarin. Of course. It had to be this way. Vissna wasn't born to be happy. She was born to a dead planet, dead parents, and an unforgiving aunt who gave her away to be sold into slavery the minute she found out about her powers. She was walking rotten misery and decay, that corroded everything pure she touched.
She pushed up against the wall, letting it support her weight. She was so close to knowing what it was like to be taken care of. She wanted to go back to the time she had first met her Master. Those first few weeks were the best time of her life. She was freed from slavery, fed, slept in a warm bed, was given a purpose…
Satine looked around the empty room. She noticed something on the floor. It was a glove. Din's glove. She crawled over to it on her hands and knees. She looked for the other one but didn't see it. She clutched it to her chest, circling up in a ball, remembering how it felt to have his hands warming hers. She slept there, naked on the floor, feeling too worthless to sleep in a bed, a punishment.
/
Din walked into his room and locked the door so he could remove his helmet with shaky hands. He set the helmet on the table, next to a plate of food. Shit. He hadn't fed Vissna. Shit. Vissna. He had become used to seeing ghosts from his past, this was different. He was very young then, practically a kid himself. But his reasoning didn't sit well with him or make him feel any less guilt. He had done a lot of things he wasn't particularly proud of… Xi'an being one of them.
He pulled one glove out of his pocket, but couldn't find the other. He must have left it in her room. She probably ate it or ripped it to pieces by now. He wouldn't blame her if she had. He was honestly surprised he left the room unscathed. He sat down at the table, next to his plate of food, not eating it, not hungry for it. He had a problem, Vissna. She was and always had been a problem ever since he collected her. But now he couldn't even consider bringing her to Bo. He wondered if Bo was the one who gave Vissna away as a kid to begin with. He couldn't rely on her to fight against the Pykes. She was too explosive and unpredictable. Maybe that was a good thing? Maybe he'd leave her alone in a room full of Pykes like a bomb. Release her anger out on someone that wasn't him.
He went into the bathroom and washed his face. He didn't yet have a plan for her, but he knew what he needed to do next.
/
