Everyone and anything familiar belong to Janet. Mistakes are mine alone.

"Look around you, Helen," I told her. "Who do you see?" Since she's still staring at the envelope wedged under her clasped hands, I answered for her. "You see your daughter's husband, her life-long friend, and two men that you've never met who are likely going to be members of my family. I'm sure you've noticed the lack of participation from your family. Stephanie's too angry to be anywhere near you. Frank has given up any hope that you'll change. Edna's been too busy conspiring with Ella over the last couple of days to do more than wave at us. And I'm sure you've heard that Valerie is tired of you trying to make her your go-between, between you and my building, she's no longer answering your calls."

I let that sink in for a moment before continuing.

"When you're sitting here all alone, staring at the walls while you listen to the clock tick away the day, you may think you've lost it all already, but I'm here to promise that there is so much more on the chopping block if you try to push me. You won't win. I already have everything I want, you're on the cusp of handing over what little you have left."

I was having little impact on her almost catatonic response to my words and her divorce papers, so Thaddeus spoke up.

"I've heard the details of this particular case, Mrs. Plum," he told her, "and I can assure you that no court in this country will see you and your claims as anything other than an act of spite. I'll even venture to say that a psychological evaluation will be suggested if you go through with this. I'm not talking about an evaluation of your mother's faculties, yours will be called into question for ceasing to care about a potentially dangerous living situation if your husband came home to you. If you believe Mrs. Mazur is being neglected or is in an unhealthy living environment, where your husband chooses to live wouldn't determine what you do about it."

"A lawyer would argue that either you're lying so you can try to extort your spouse, or you don't care that your elderly mother could be harmed. I can win a case against you on that observation alone," Arlen added.

"I wouldn't let Edna hear you call her elderly. But she is safer and happier with us than she's been since she was a young girl," I said. "She has high-level security to every doctor's appointment she's required to go to, and she still gets to live life on her terms."

"And I'm sure the court will agree with you," the elder Boyce confirmed.

"Did you hear that, Helen?" I asked. "Thaddeus knows what he's talking about, which a quick Google search of his career will confirm. You want to question everyone else's sanity, are you prepared for yours to be put under a psychological microscope?"

My rage reared its head as I remembered every one of the times I had to assure Stephanie that she isn't crazy, as Helen or the dick detective had just called her.

That got a reaction. "There is nothing wrong with my mind," my mother-in-law stated.

"I'm sure you believe that," I told her, "the question is whether those who could be deciding yours or Edna's future will agree with you. It's possible you'll have to leave this house with zero input from Frank or I, if a judge decides that you're battling a few loose screws that need to be treated on an inpatient basis. Signing the papers, and leaving Edna and Frank alone from this day forward, will ensure that you won't have to prove yourself sane to experts who won't buy your shit."

"I don't know what you're talking about, and I do not appreciate your tone," she replied.

"I know you don't. Would you like to take a guess on how little I care about that?"

Arlen jumped in. "From everything I've heard so far, this is a fair dissolution of your marriage, more generous than most. I suggest you sign the papers and focus on what the next chapter of your life will be. If you challenge it, I can guarantee with almost a hundred percent certainty, that you'll come up lacking ... leaving the court to reward your husband for initially being willing to leave you enough to live comfortably on."

"After everything he's done to me, I don't need a thing from that man …"

"The only thing Frank has done is put up with you for too long, but I'm glad to hear that you don't want his support," I told her. "So now he can concentrate his thoughts and pay on what he wants for a change."

"Now you wait just one minute …"

"I'm done waiting. Sign the papers or lose the rest of your life here. Those are your only two options. The choice is yours."

If it were possible for a person to melt and be absorbed into the carpet until we leave, I have no doubt Helen would have attempted it. As it was, she stared at us, Eddie longer than the three of us, and then opened the envelope. It will be hard to be the respected and feared Mrs. Helen Plum if she's lacking the husband and the Burg address.

"What do I get to keep if I do sign this nonsense?" She asked one of the three of us. "You should be ashamed of yourselves. Breaking up marriages like it's all in a day's work."

"Your marriage was DOA. You and Frank have only been existing together, nothing more. As for your question, by signing those … you get to keep waking up in your bedroom and remain in the thick of the Burg shit," I told her. "I know this visit is about Frank, but if I find out that my wife has been dragged into this … I won't hesitate to take action. Your divorce is between you and what Frank wants, but I will step in if you involve Stephanie in any way or threaten Edna again."

"You have some nerve," she accused. "I was right all along about you."

"I have a hell of a lot more than nerve." I took the pen Arlen produced from his briefcase and tossed it onto her lap on top of the now empty envelope. "Sign. Don't make me repeat myself ... you won't like the outcome."

She made sure she didn't look at any of us when she scrawled her name wherever Arlen pointed. After she was done, she threw his pen onto the coffee table, dumped the papers beside her onto the couch cushion, and stormed out of the room and up the stairs. She didn't look back.

"We'll see ourselves out," Thaddeus said to the silent room.

"You were not kidding," Arlen told me, gathering up the paperwork and returning it to its envelope. "That woman isn't a fan of ours."

"Don't take it personally," I told him, taking point and opening the front door for the men. "She hates everyone unless they can do something for her … and even then she only tolerates them long enough to get the favor she wants done. I can't name a single person I believe she genuinely likes."

I locked the door handle behind us and we paused by our vehicles to continue our conversation.

"It's hard to believe the sister-in-law I've heard so much about comes from that," Arlen noted.

"Steph is the polar opposite of Mrs. Plum," Eddie told him. "Before Ranger came along, I was afraid her friendly personality, when she's not pissed at you, and trusting nature would get her seriously hurt one day."

"It did," I replied. "But those traits are also what got my foot in her door."

"I heard it was something to do with a now-dead asshole and a shower curtain rod," Eddie joked.

Arlen started shaking his head. "Feel free not to share that particular story. Anyway, given what Celia has said, Stephanie isn't anything like her mother. I admit, I got real serious about marriage hearing how your sister described yours and Stephanie's casual wedding surrounded by family in your parents' house. She was just sharing a sweet story, and I was already planning to create another one."

Thaddeus glanced my way. "You do what you can to give them advice that will help them be successful in life, and they go ahead and completely disregard it."

I was tempted to smile. "I have a toddler at home teaching me that lesson right now."

"I'd follow you home just so I can see Olive, but Shirley would kill me," Eddie confessed.

"You're darn right she would," we heard coming from the vicinity of his pants. "We need to talk about what just happened."

Arlen backed up with his hands held up in front of him. "Don't wanna know that story either."

"If you're in such a hurry to get married, you'd better get real used to the idea of being tracked by your wife."

"Mr. Gazarra isn't wrong," Thaddeus informed his son. "Your mother expects me back before three or she'll send out the troops to look for me."

"Arlen's two Uncles are Army," I said, cluing Eddie in.

"And they take my Mama's happiness and mood very seriously," the younger Boyce told us.

"As they should, being her big brothers," Thaddeus replied, turning towards me. "We need to do this again, without a legal situation marring the day."

"We will," I promised.

Arlen held up his brief/laptop case. "I'll get these filed and get back to you with the next step," he said to me.

We did the respectful nod-thing again in lieu of handshakes and they retreated to their Lexus as Eddie and I got into my Cayenne.

"Do you think that will be enough to keep Mrs. Plum under control?" He asked me, as we pulled up in front of the Gazarra residence.

"I have a backup plan for every backup plan I've worked out. Edna, Frank, and my wife, are where they belong and it'll take more than my mother-in-law to make them move."

The hint of a smile I caught as he opened the door and slid out of the passenger's seat seemed bittersweet. He paused before closing the door.

"Thank you for taking care of them in ways we couldn't."

I acknowledged his comment with a tilt of my head. What's there to say? My family is mine to protect. Ten minutes later, I parked in the underground garage and took the stairs to seven. I can take the stairs faster than the elevator could get me to the penthouse and I'm anxious to be home.

I let myself in without making a sound and followed the noise inside to locate my ladies. Everyone, including Mo and Gunny, were making 'blanket angels' on our bed according to the encouragements I heard Steph saying to Olivia. Rex's cage is now on the nightstand, but he was doing normal domesticated-rat things like running on his wheel.

Olivia had ditched her sneakers but had surprisingly left on her socks, likely due to the fact that they're a lighter shade of purple than her tiny cargo pants and have kitten faces on the toes that match her T-shirt. She was sitting up to try to get a better look at the angel her Mama was making on the surface of the velour throw Steph uses when she curls up on the couch. There's no adjective to accurately describe the sound my baby made when she spotted me in the doorway before shouting the word that never fails to crack my heart open.

"Daddy!"

"I wish," my wife said to her, not realizing that I'm here in the flesh and not just in our daughter's thoughts.

"I'm revoking our dogs' treat privileges for letting someone reach the bedroom without alerting you," I said, moving towards the bed quickly so Olivia wouldn't try jumping off it to get to me.

"Don't blame the boys," Steph told me, sitting up and putting a hand on each mutt head as if they understood that and take my threat seriously, "you're like a Ninja but quieter."

I reached my free hand out to help her get upright again. "Thank you."

She smoothed her hands down her jeans-clad thighs and then ran one through her now staticky hair. "I was going a little nuts waiting for you to come home, because I'm so good I located two skips in under twenty minutes, so we literally dog piled on the bed to burn off a little restless energy."

Olivia poked a little fingertip into my cheek. "Weed may anles," she told me when I turned to her.

"I saw. I bet yours even had a halo."

"Ado," she repeated.

I kissed her cheek. "Don't worry, you don't need to know what one is to have one."

I glanced back at my wife who appeared to be pulled in two different directions. I can't blame Gunner or Ammo for that this time, since the boys took advantage of the now empty bed to sprawl out in it while they're being allowed to.

I didn't want to prolong her suffering so I just told her. "Helen signed the divorce papers. Arlen is going to personally submit them to the court."

Her nerves must have been the only thing holding her up, because she suddenly sat down on the mattress in-between the dog tails.

"If you're kidding, I'm going to kill you," she warned me after a full moment of silence.

"I wouldn't joke about something like this. To say she isn't pleased with me, and now Eddie, would be making light of what went down, but she understood that if she wants to play a game … I'm going to take great pleasure in dismantling every way she thinks she has of winning."

I let Olivia down on the bed beside Stephanie and felt my heart clench when our daughter tried to manually form a smile on her Mama's face. Her attempts worked and she received an honest one in return. Steph curled her arms around our baby and sat her on her lap so Olive could double over and grab her cat-toes again.

"So we're done? Grandma's staying? My Dad can get on with his life? And I'm not going to be stuck hearing how I single-handedly orchestrated the end of the world again?"

I bent forward and pressed my lips to hers. "You're welcome."

She sighed with relief. "Thank you. I wish I knew what I did to deserve you so I can do it again."

"Just continue to be you and we'll call it even."

"Are you sure there's no way she can use this against us? Tell someone she was coerced into signing and nullify the agreement?"

"She can try, but it won't amount to much beyond spending money that she's going to need once it starts being legally rationed. If she wants to question Edna's cognitive skills, hers will be immediately challenged. Edna is crazy, but not in the way Helen is. At the moment, everyone can see who's the one with reality-issues. Even Eddie has noticed a difference in Helen. You and Valerie are adults so she can't guilt or force Frank to stay married to her. And your father has realized he doesn't have to stay where he isn't wanted or appreciated."

"Wow. Okay. Yeah … I can deal with this." She dodged Olivia's ponytail so she could kiss her cheek. "It just feels so weird to finally have things settled. I never doubt what you can accomplish, but I know my mother. I thought she'd already come up with a new way to stick it to us."

"I made it known that any attempt to contact you or disrupt our life here, will give me permission to stop playing nice."

That coaxed a grin out of her. "I guarantee she does not want to see you in a mood. I love you and I know you'd never hurt me, but I still try to avoid seriously pissing you off. You're freakin' scary. Still sexy, but reeeally scary."

"You are one of the very few who don't need to fear me. My daughters and my parents are the other four. Would you like me to speak to your father privately, or should we invite him up here and give him the news together?"

She didn't answer right away, taking time to consider both of their feelings on the matter. "I think this calls for a rallying of family. I want to gauge how he takes it and also let him know that I don't think he's being at all selfish for actively trying to save his own life. I think he still believes a separation or divorce will take our mother away, when we never really had one. Val and I grew up with a woman only playing a role."

"He knows that, Babe. Your, Valerie, and Edna's, support is likely why he was able to stand up for himself like this."

"I hope so. He may have stayed married to my mother for us, so it's only fitting that he gets a new lease on life because of us."

She let our daughter slither off her lap and decided to let sleeping dogs lie as we moved through the apartment until we all wound up in the living room where Steph placed the call.

Instead of us all being mounded on the bed … Steph, Olivia and I, ended up in a relaxed heap on the couch when we heard Frank knock. That's when our attack dogs decided to spring into action and act like they have a job to do. I had to maneuver between the boys to reach the front door.

"Stephanie said we have something to discuss?" He asked.

"Yes. I'll let her fill you in on the details, but I wanted a minute alone to say this to you man-to man … you're free now. Make the most of your life."