Summary: Another nightmare
A/N: Thanks so much for your comments and reading. I hope you enjoy this next chapter.
Chapter 5
Harry and Hermione were talking with a blindfolded Phineas Nigellus Black. Since Ron's desertion, it had been somewhat comforting to have Black's picture propped on a chair so he could visit and tell them of the happenings at Hogwarts.
"The students are giving the Headmaster a hard time," he stated when asked about how things were. "But Professor Snape has done an excellent job handing down detentions. He says the Professors Carrow couldn't come up with decent punishments if their lives depended on it."
Hermione listened raptly, trying to figure out just what the professor was doing to keep the children safe.
"What's the difference between his detentions and theirs?" she asked.
"Well," he said matter-of-factly, "Severus says that all the Carrows are interested in is punishment. He wants them to learn, so he sets them up with Hagrid and has them sent to the Forbidden Forest."
Harry snorted, which caused Black to look his way. "Why are you laughing, boy?"
Harry crinkled his nose in disgust. "Snape as the Headmaster is a joke. He's a murderer."
Phineas Nigellus tutted. "How dare you! Don't you dare say anything against the Headmaster! Why he's the first Slytherin Headmaster since my tenure!"
With that, the man in the painting turned and disappeared.
"I guess we won't see him for a couple days," Hermione said with a sigh.
"You know what, Hermione, I don't care. I'm sick of him making Snape into a God. He's a foul, evil git!"
Hermione shrugged, not really knowing what to say to appease her friend. She no longer had the desire to badmouth Professor Snape knowing what she did. She hoped that Harry was done with his rant, but sadly he wasn't.
"I hope I can face him. I want to be the one to end him."
Hermione bit her lip.
"I always knew he was evil. I should have said more to Dumbledore."
"Harry, you didn't know everything."
"I hate him! I'm going to kill him."
"The last time you said that you were talking about Sirius, and look how that turned out."
Harry stood, anger filling his face. "That was different! Sirius was innocent."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Shouldn't that have taught you that some things aren't what they seem to be?"
"Whose side are you on, Hermione? For Merlin's sake, he murdered Dumbledore!"
Hermione rose. She tried to swallow her anger. Harry had every reason to think Snape evil, but she knew differently. She also knew that nothing she told him would be believed. If she said she'd been in contact with the man, Harry would accuse her of being under a spell or something.
"Harry, this has nothing to do with taking sides. I'm just saying… we may not know the whole story."
"I saw him kill Dumbledore in cold blood. What other story could there be?"
Hermione shrugged. "I don't know. Just… just keep an open mind."
"Hermione, this isn't one of your projects. He's irredeemable. He's a murderer and a Death Eater. There's no championing for him."
Hermione raised her hands in surrender. "I know what you're saying. I simply…" She stared at Harry and internally gave up. "You're right."
She left it at that and retired to her bedroom area. Pulling the tent door closed behind her, she threw herself onto her camp bed. Huffing, she thought about Harry. He was stubborn, and when he'd made up his mind about someone, it took something earth-shattering to change it. She'd need to be careful if they were ever to be in the same place as Snape. He'd shoot spells and ask questions later. Granted, Snape could defend himself brilliantly, but it wouldn't hurt to have someone in his corner.
She hoped that once Harry knew the truth, he'd think differently of his professor.
oooOOOooo
Another week had passed, and the cauldrons continued to lessen. Snape had still been surly, but he had softened somewhat. He wouldn't go into detail much, but she had learned that he was annoyed with Neville, as the 'boy doesn't know what's good for him.'
He'd gone on to explain that Neville continuously stood up to the Carrows, and there was only so much he could do to keep them from extreme retaliation. Hermione worried about her friends and their safety. Sadly, there was nothing she could do to help them.
Her alarm buzzed within her, making her jump up slightly. She sighed as she settled back into her camp bed to go back to sleep and join Severus in his dreams. She closed her eyes and meditated for a few minutes before saying the spell.
"Transferi Selento"
She appeared on the Astronomy tower.
"Oh no," she uttered and quickly rushed to find Severus.
She rounded the corner and saw him slumped down on his knees. The deed had evidently already been done. He was alone; the Death Eaters having run off already.
She rushed to him and knelt down, placing her hand on his shoulder.
"Professor… "
The man straightened himself and glared at her. "Miss Granger, how did you get up here?"
"The stairs, sir?" she said haltingly.
"You must go. They could come back."
"They're halfway to the Apparition point by now."
"Still..."
"Professor, I'm not going anywhere. You need a friend."
"We are not friends, Miss Granger."
"I am your friend, sir."
He motioned toward the wall.
"I kill my friends," he said darkly.
Hermione's lips thinned. "Severus Snape, you did what you had to do. Dumbledore wanted you to do this."
"No one will understand. I might as well follow him over the edge." His eyes were riveted to where the Headmaster had plunged over the wall.
"Listen to me!" Hermione demanded as she shook him. "I know you can't tell anyone the truth, but they will understand when they find out."
"I will be dead by then. They will have killed me, and I will have deserved it."
Hermione reached out, not really realizing what she was doing. Her hand gripped Snape's chin and she pulled his face towards her.
"You are the bravest man I have ever met," she said to him.
His face crumpled. "I am a murderer."
"There's a big difference between murder and what you did for Professor Dumbledore."
He shook his head. "No."
Hermione watched him. He was filled with grief, just like last time. He breathed heavily and tried to control his emotions. As she saw his immense pain, she began to feel angry. How dare the Headmaster ask such a thing of Professor Snape? There had to be other ways he could have ended his life.
"Why did he make you do this, Professor? Couldn't he have done something else?"
"Many things, I would suspect."
"But I don't understand."
Severus grimaced.
"He always wanted to have me under his thumb. He enjoyed using me."
"I thought… I thought you were friends," she said with a curious glance.
"We were. Dumbledore doesn't care who he sacrifices for the Greater Good. Even… "
Snape stopped himself there, and Hermione wondered what he had been about to say. She figured he
wouldn't go into detail since he'd cut himself off.
Anger suddenly filled Hermione. "How could he do that?" she cried. "If he was your friend, he wouldn't have made you do something like this. He'd figure out another way!"
Snape looked at her. "There was no other way!"
"Professor, I beg to differ. There were several things he could have done. He could have done it himself instead of being a coward and making you do it."
He regarded her curiously. "No, he said that I had to… "
"No, he lied! I thought he cared about us, but he doesn't care about anyone! He's left Harry to figure everything out without any real clues. He let you be labeled as a murderer because he was too cowardly to do it himself."
"Miss Granger!" Snape said crisply. "I agreed. Potter agreed. We are just as… guilty."
Hermione tried to reel in her emotions. It was doing neither one of them any good for her to freak out as she was doing.
"You're right, of course. It's just not fair, Professor. You deserve much better than this." She motioned around them.
"I did what he asked me to do. It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks."
He said it as if he were trying to convince himself of that very fact.
Hermione nodded vigorously, her eyes wide. "That's right. You're not a murderer. You can't let what others think affect you. They don't know the truth, do they?"
He gave a slight shake of his head.
"If they did, they would understand."
"I doubt it."
Hermione eyed him. He was defeated. She would never be able to convince him that he could be forgiven by everyone. She could do one thing, though…
"Well, I understand," she said simply. "I admire you even. You are surrounded by people who hate you because they think you've done this heinous act, and you deal with them day after day and don't let them get the best of you."
"I'm tired of them looking at me like I'm an insect," he said finally.
Hermione's hand came out and grasped his arm.
"It must be so difficult."
He nodded.
"Would it help for you to know that someone understood?" she asked tentatively.
Looking at the floor, he gave one quick, short nod.
She reached out and touched his forehead. "Pacem," she said.
He looked at her. She met his eyes and explained what she'd just done.
"The spell will help you to bring forward these feelings into the waking world. It will help you to not feel solitary in your task. You won't remember that I know the truth, but you'll know someone understands. The relief will help you to function and deal with everyone you have to deal with."
"Why would you do this?" Snape asked.
"Well, Professor, you know I'm a champion for those who haven't been treated fairly."
"So, I am to be your next project."
"Professor Snape, I said I was your friend. You are not a project. I have always respected you, and I admire you for everything you have done and are doing for us."
"No one admires me," he said as his eyebrows knit together.
"Well, I don't know if that's true, but I'm telling you that I do."
He sighed heavily. "If you say so."
She squeezed his arm again. "I say so."
She stood then.
"You should get off this tower, sir," she told him.
"And you should go back to wherever it is you really are."
She smiled at him as he stood.
"I'll see you again soon," she told him.
His eyes showed hope, although he'd never admit it. He gave her a curt nod, turned, and left. She felt herself move back into her bed and opened her eyes. She hoped the Pacem spell would help him to feel better. She couldn't understand how he had made it this far being so alone. How awful it must be for him to be reviled by everyone he knew, even those who had previously had respect for him and had been his friends. He needed something to help him get through all of that. Surely the Pacem spell would make things a little easier for the man. He deserved no less than that.
