Love Fool

By Haruka Lin

Translated by Grand Illusion

#This doujin story is based on "the lunch(box) scenes" in You Can (Not) Advance, Bon Appétit!

On the counter, Shinji placed the four bento boxes in order. On the stove, he tossed eight baby octopus Wiener sausages into a skillet over low heat, drizzled some oil on them, and sprinkled a little black pepper for seasoning and some chopped green onion for extra zesty flavor.

Shinji had never thought about the level of his cooking skills, and had always cooked for himself. He was not very particular about it. Besides, Misato-san never commented on his cooking at all. Whether it's "grab-and-go" fast food bought at the supermarket, or his seriously-prepared black pepper steak with rice, she treated all the equally without distinction. Dr. Akagi was right in saying that Misato loves her beer over her food, and Shinji doesn't get any comfort from the cooking either, He just cooks.

Ever since Shinji started making bento for Asuka, his cooking has become subject of critique. Sometimes the meat was overcooked, sometimes the fish was too raw, sometimes the effort was slack, but other times it was very serious. Sometimes it was mixed with much of his reparation, sometimes it was his conduit to act tough and indifferent. Shinji never knew the difference between cooking with and without emotion. For him, cooking is like bread and butter, it wouldn't be made heavenly sweet because he was happy, or devilishly spicy because he was angry. Asuka, on the other hand, commented on his cooking like a passionate performance art critic. Even the "art" itself hardly changed, but his "judge" constantly did. Her temperament eluded him until recently, Shinji managed to figure out her little pattern. When she said "not bad", what she really meant is "excellent", and when she said "so-so", what she meant is "above average with room for improvement". Of course, Shinji couldn't decipher this pattern from her evaluation after each meal, but rather inferred it from her comments on herself after her "post-meal" video game rounds. She is an elite EVA Unit-02 pilot after all, well-trained and disciplined, and it is only natural that she kept standards high for Shinji.

He didn't mean to forget to cook for her yesterday. After all, you can get lunch at school cafeteria. He didn't think it was a big deal if he missed cooking for her just this once, but Asuka was furious about it. A boy and a girl yelling at each other in the classroom would naturally invite gossip. He tries to put things to rest, but Asuka was relentless. At that moment, Toji entered the door and said tantalizingly: "Look at this, the newlyweds are fighting". Shinji thought to himself, "here we go again". He was about to argue when he looked up and saw Asuka blushing like a persimmon, and he hurriedly blushed along with her. If he didn't, Asuka would have killed him.

This shows that bento is as important to Asuka as tribute to the gods. In order to have a calm day ahead, Shinji woke up early this morning and started making bento.

The baby octopus sausages slid slowly over the oiled skillet, sizzling. Shinji occasionally tossing and turning them by shaking the pan. Thinking it was about done, Shinji took a pair of wooden chopsticks, picked up a piece and took a tiny bite, sipping his mouth because sausage was hot that it burned his lip. He usually doesn't not do this, but since he now has a "goddess" who could see through his cooking to the depths of sloppiness in his soul, Shinji is so afraid that he cannot help but to do his best.

Well, not really. Shinji still enjoys cooking for Asuka, because Asuka usually eats everything clean in her the bento, every time. Ayanami on the other hand, eats only a little. Although Shinji likes Ayanami's character, but it is such a pity that all her leftovers has to go straight to trash.

Funny. Asuka loves these little sausages Shinji made, with a cross cut on the one end, split like tentacles of the octopus. She always eats one whole piece at a time, with one cheek puffing out, chewing it adorably. Perhaps It takes an entire afternoon to digest those sausages satisfactorily enough for her to leave him alone for the most part, or when Shinji threatens Asuka with "no sausages tomorrow," she always back away her pushiness and gives Shinji a "good look demeanor" full of anger. He wondered what magic those baby octopus Wiener sausages were exerting on Asuka to make the haughty pilot succumb to his grasp.

Perhaps, it was the work of a red-skinned devil who had stimulated his central nervous system with a fork, a wicked idea emerged from the flurry of Shinji's thoughts. The idea frightened him so much that he has to look around immediately, make sure there was no one looking. There was only the sound of water running in the shower. Shinji has always prepared every meal in a serious, disciplined manner, never wanting to tarnish his track record because of a momentary oversight. However, ... however, the idea was just too absurd, too exhilarating, too much...fun. Tomorrow, the world could end by an Angel's attack on Tokyo III, so it's okay to do something out of the ordinary today. Obviously, Shinji had no idea through what forces drove him to do this. With a sense of ritual with rebellious spirit, Ikari Shinji moved the sausage away from his lips, opened the lid of one of the bento boxes - he didn't have to look to know which one it was - and put the sausage in. This sausage was Asuka's third serving, one more than what Shinji prepared for the other boxes. He swiveled the bitten side down and covered it with a piece of broccoli. Like a super-spy with top secrets mission, this sausage blend-in with several other round-shaped processed meats product nearby, sharing their innocent appearance and earnest eagerness to be eaten.

He then calmly washed the chopsticks and the skillet clean in the sink, put the steamed rice in her bento box, sprinkle some seaweed seasoning on the rice as usual, close the lid and wrapped the bento together with her wooden chopstick box, discreetly and delicately with a light pink lunch cloth. He did all of this without breaking a sweat. Although the way Asuka looked at him was not any different, Shinji felt strange. As if he himself had become an object to be observed by Asuka, instead of examining and transcending everything as in the days gone by.

Shinji wanted to slip out before her, then words "Did you make my bento today?" came. He stopped in his tracks, and he felt like as if a cyclone started to form around him. He was overwhelmed by the inexplicable fate and future, it compresses him, he felt short of breath. Should he fail, and his schemes would be revealed, the truth would be out. He would be pressed into the torture table, and a torrent of spotlights would reveal his naked thoughts openly, like invisible ink on a paper catalyzed by a chemical called "I like you" that reads: "Shinji is an evil boy, a despicable pervert, who tried to steal someone's first kiss and carried out a clumsy plot in the broad daylight."

It was the light of anticipation that shone in Asuka's pretty blue eyes saved him. Somehow, he felt she wouldn't care. She expected him to do something, she even went onto his bed in the middle of the night. When he told her those things about himself and his father, she seemed satisfied and not long before she let out a gentle snore after softy calling him a "baka".

Just when things were about to be busted, the fourteen-year-old "spy" smiled radiantly like Mona Lisa at every last moment. Asuka held her breath, and the stars in the sky were no match for his god-like smile. Although he did not know it at the time, this smile still lit up the long dark night of the pilot of EVA Unit-02 for the next fourteen years.

One day, he would know how she pictured his face in all of those starless nights.

Post Script:

In You Can (Not) Advance, during Shinji's cooking scene, there are a total of eight sausages in the skillet. With four lunch boxes, each box supposes to have two sausages, but Asuka opened her lunch box and saw three ...Even a fool can guess who gave her that extra one... Upon re-watch the "2.0" as I remembered, in fact the Japanese style croquette in her box has signs of a bite ... whatever, Asuka enjoy it all!