A/N:

remember when this was supposed to be a oneshot?
yeah, me neither

speaking of the beginning of this fic, I rewrote chapter one! :D
it's mostly the same, but it's (hopefully) of higher quality and has a few more lines added
obviously you don't need to read it again if you already have. again, same gist, just written less awkwardly :)


It's a beautiful day outside. Birds are singing, flowers are blooming. On days like these…

He really wants to chuck Orochimaru into the depths of hell and be done with it.

Unfortunately, he's stuck shadowing a group of preteens in a forest filled with man-eating tigers and spiders that put Australia's arachnids to shame, anxiously waiting for said snake man to ambush them all.

Suffice to say, he is having a Bad Time™ and is getting horribly irritated with the way he unconsciously twitches at even the smallest rustle of leaves. He's alert, sure, but at the expense of his poor, fried nerves and rapidly declining mental state.

And then, because the universe can't decide whether it hates or loves him, the group has the nerve to split apart.

Obito barely has a moment to think about how absolutely bullshit it is that this situation hadn't been explored in the anime before he's forced to chase after Sasuke like a deranged fangirl. Although he's undoubtedly the most capable, he's the one who's being targeted, and if he somehow gets the curse mark due to some sort of butterfly effect-related fuckery, Obito's going to lose it.

In the end, though, he doesn't run into Orochimaru. No, instead, he comes across a giant fucking bear, because why the fuck not?

Actually, he doesn't even know why he's surprised. At this point, nothing short of the Elemental Nations deciding to work out their differences with Dance Dance Revolution instead of war should phase him.

Though that would probably put Kumo at such an advantage, even if Killer Bee was the only one who bothered to participate. Or… maybe someone like Gai could balance him out?

But he digresses.

Sasuke takes out the bear without Obito's intervention, then proceeds to channel his unparalleled interpersonal skills to blankly stare at the redhead he'd saved for all of three seconds before offering a near-unintelligible goodbye and spiriting away.

For reasons which shall forever be unknown to him, the redhead seems to find his aloofness - *cough* emotional constipation *cough* - attractive. Obito truly does not understand the thoughts and reasoning skills of teenage girls. Or maybe he just doesn't understand anyone's thought process, period.

Unfortunately for his sanity (and weak self-preservation instincts) this isn't just any girl. All redheads are plot-relevant after all.

(Except for Gaara's dad, but fuck him. He barely even counts anyway.)

Not for the first time, Obito curses the fact that he has a conscience - and a needy one, at that - and drops into the miniature clearing to make himself known.

Karin tenses even before he's completely visible. Obito abruptly remembers that she's a talented sensor, and the only reason she hadn't noticed him before was probably because she was busy being attacked by a raging bear.

"Who are you?" she asks, eyes flicking between him and the way Sasuke had just taken off.

He usually doesn't get this type of response as Obito, which is interesting considering he has horrible facial scars. Maybe it's the environment? Or maybe people just really don't like shady characters who barely have an inch of skin showing.

…No, it's definitely got to be the type of clothes, if that's true. In both this world and the last, if the common simpage over Kakashi is anything to go by.

A crunch echoes throughout the air. Obito glances up to see Karin staring down at a leaf, looking torn between embarrassment and terror.

He closes his eyes for a long, pained second. He really, really needs to stop going off on mental tangents in the middle of conversations. Or in battle. Or literally anywhere.

"My name is—"

Oh. Ah, fuck, I knew I forgot something.

"—Tobi."

This is it for me. This is how I get found out. Because I can't think of cover names to give to preteen girls who wouldn't even be able to know if I was lying.

"Tobi?" Karin echoes, then swallows. "What do you want? My scroll?"

Her—

Oh, right. Chunin exams. Hah.

"No. I just want to get you out of here."

Immediately, her eyes take on a wet sheen, and she takes a loose defensive stance. Obito promptly realizes how his words might have been misinterpreted.

"No— no. I mean I want to help you get away from your teammates. Your village." He presses his lips together beneath his mask and eyes her bite-riddled arms. She must notice, because she pulls back and hunches in on herself. "If you want, I can take you somewhere safer. Somewhere where you won't have to do that anymore."

Obito tries not to wince at his explanation. To him, it just sounds like, No, no. I don't want to kidnap you in a badway. I want to kidnap you in a goodway!

Which is probably what Orochimaru had done, except he would've spoken far more eloquently.

He grimaces, trying not to focus on that thought. It's mostly fine, because Karin seems to consider his words, if the sudden hope shining in her eyes is any indication. Mostly, because like every other goddamn person in this universe, she really needs to learn the concept of 'stranger danger,' but he's not really going to go over that right now when he needs her to trust him.

"You… You can do that?" she asks, then seems to hesitate. "No… They'll find me. They always—" She cuts herself off, looking slightly haunted. Obito thinks that if he knew what she was going to say, he'd be waging war on her shitty little village.

"I know… a woman," Obito explains slowly, already mentally apologizing and praying for his own health and safety. "Who can take care of you and make sure that you're never found by your old village." Then, because she's still frowning, he adds, "And even if you are, she can beat their asses and send them running home with their tails between their legs."

Karin bites her lip. "...Who?"

"Tsunade of the Sannin," he answers immediately, and snorts when he sees her eyes widen. "You know of her?"

"Know of— everyone knows about her. I hear about her in my village all the time. She's super strong, enough to take out mountains in a punch. And she's better at healing than anyone else. Even—" she pauses, excitement draining away. "Even me." Under her breath is a wobbly, "Or, that's what everyone would complain about anyway."

When tears drip down her cheeks, Obito resists the urge to chase after her dickwad teammates and beat their village's leaders over the head with their flailing bodies.

"She might be able to teach you," he instead blurts out, because he's awful at handling crying people. He regrets the words as soon as they come out of his mouth, because Tsunade should still be terrified to properly heal people at this point in the timeline and probably won't care to take on another student before Sakura comes around, but Karin looks at him like he just told her Christmas came early and he can't bring himself to take them back. "You know. If you want." Hesitantly, he says, "You don't need to heal anyone anymore, if you don't want to."

Karin stares at him like she doesn't know what to think. Like she's never been offered a choice before.

(He knows that she hasn't. He hopes that can change.)

Her expression reflects her hesitation, but eventually, it settles into something more determined. She parts her lips to speak, and—

A copse of trees in the distance crashes to the ground, and cacophony of squawks echoes throughout the air as birds flutter off from their former perches, clearly terrified.

Obito barely has time to think before he's in front of Karin, a stream of constant curses rattling around in his head. "I have to go," he tells her quickly. "I will be back. But right now, I have to go help someone else." His eyes flick back towards the still-raging winds. "I meant what I said. I will find you soon, and whatever you choose, I'll accept. Got that?"

Karin stares at him, wide-eyed, but she must sense his urgency, because she gives a jerky nod.

"Okay," he says, more gently than before. "Thank you."

And with that, he's off to deal with an invasive snake.


A/N:

this fic, having serious moments? it's more likely than you think

YEAHHHH, sorry, I know this is crack but I've gotta get the plot moving somehow, even if it's super cringey
the suggestion to save Karin came from Esmeraude11 on ao3, so thank you for that :)
I know you wanted her dumped at Kakashi's doorstep instead of Tsunade's, but I figured this made more sense, sorry ;,D

anyway
Thanks for reading!