Amity's at her desk trying to study when her phone buzzes. Date tonight?, it pops up under Luz's name. She's confused for a moment, maybe she sent that to the wrong person. That thought makes her incredibly jealous so, no, the text was definitely meant for her.
And then she's confused again. Date? She wasn't aware that they were on dating terms. Let alone did she know they were on one-night-stand terms and yet...why is she so surprised?
She really doesn't know what to say. Of course she was going to say yes but, how does she say it? She isn't desperate. At least, not anymore. It's just casual fun. A casual date, probably.
She takes a long while to reply, studies a little longer. She wants Luz to wait on her for once. If she always gave her what she wanted right away then she'd have all the power. Then this whole thing would hurt even more when it was all over.
Finally after an hour, Luz texts again. ?
Amity bites back an excited smile, types her reply. Sure, but where would we go?
Anywhere you want
I don't know.
I'll pick u up at 6sharp
Okay.
It was already three in the afternoon and now...Amity wasn't going to get any more work done for the rest of the day. She was too nervous. For the next three hours, she passed the time with needless distractions, Twitter and Instagram. She would have a heart attack if she put any more thought into what she was going to wear. (A dress, she decides because it'll be easier for later)
Six rolls around and Luz shows up fifteen minutes early much to Amity's annoyance. Either way she rushes downstairs, down the driveway where Luz was waiting outside the car. Amity rushes up to her and they greet with a deep kiss and it takes her breath away. It's just the beginning of the night and already she's so…
"Wanna go get drunk?" Luz asks straight out, a mischievous glint in her eye. Amity laughs but then she pauses when she realizes Luz is being completely serious.
"No," she croaks, still winded from the kiss and— get drunk? "I don't like the headache afterwards."
"Well then it looks like you're driving us home tonight," she gives her another quick kiss and shoves her back playfully.
"You're going to do it anyways?" She squeaks, stumbling for her balance. She really wishes she'd stop doing that, pushing her around like she's an object. Even though she kind of likes it.
"Yeah," she shrugs. "I'm eighteen."
"You keep saying that," she climbs into the car when Luz holds the door open for her (how knightly of her to do so) and Amity knows exactly why she's being so congenial tonight. She knows how Amity gets when things are romantic—she hates how predictable she is but really she can't help it.
"So...where are we going?" Amity asks as they pull off, onto the main road.
"I dunno. Somewhere I can get unlimited shots," she giggles and Amity leans over to gently smack her on the arm.
"You shouldn't drink so much." She rests her head against the window, stares longingly over at her friend. (Girlfriend? She doesn't know) "It's bad for your health."
Luz glances at her, a teasing grin on her face. "What, don't tell me you care about me or something."
I do. More than you could ever know. "Of course not. You're the one driving us. Shouldn't you be responsible with your alcohol intake?"
" Alcohol intake?" She raises her eyebrows, eyes still on the road. "Why do you talk like my grandma?"
Amity rolls her eyes, tries to focus on something else. She doesn't know why she events tries with Luz. Her defiance can be quite charming at first but it becomes excessive. She doesn't understand the consequences of drinking so much but it's a futile effort trying to talk her out of it. She doesn't know why she even bothers with her at all, really.
After a short drive, they pulled up to a small bar that was actually pretty close to the shooting studio where they filmed the show. As they pass by, Amity blinks because, oh yeah. That happened. And this is what came of it… even though it's not a good thing in retrospect, she thinks Luz is the best thing to happen to her. Even if it hurts to look at her sometimes, like tonight. She knows what's going to happen.
It's dark and cramped in here too, but this time it's crowded like crazy and Amity feels like she's suffocating being stuck with all of these people here. Luz doesn't seem bothered by it in the slightest, she's actually really excited. She's been waiting for this, to finally be able to pull out her ID and order a stupid alcoholic beverage.
It's been a bit since her birthday and Amity definitely knows this isn't her first time to a bar since then. She almost wonders who else she's brought here with her.
An hour passes by and Luz has had almost six shots of—(what was it?) tequila. She'd be on her tenth if Amity weren't here to stop her. She's incredibly uncomfortable and ready to leave this stupid place jam packed with intoxicated morons. But she knows what's coming next and she wants to be relaxed about it. So she lets Luz get one more and she orders one for herself, just to loosen up a bit.
"Let's drink it together," Luz leans in, talking loudly over the obnoxious bar chatter. They clink their stupid tiny glass shot cups (that cost like, five bucks a round) and Amity quickly downs it because she hates the burn and she hates alcohol. Immediately, she feels her shoulders drop and her teeth unclench and she feels great . Now she can finally wholeheartedly laugh at Luz's stupid jokes and be one with the atmosphere. Melting into the background. She feels ready for anything now!
They get the bill and Amity gawks— forty five dollars for a few shots! That's ridiculous! Luz seems completely unfazed and readily hands over her credit card. "What's the matter, princess?" She asks when she sees Amity's shocked expression and— princess.
"You just spent so much on alcohol," she says incredulously. "You just wasted perfectly good money!"
"Well spent," she says and leans back against the booth. They wait anxiously for the waiter to come back with the receipt because they're both ready. As they tumble out into the parking lot, Luz leans on Amity for support because she can barely walk in a straight line let alone all the way back to the car without stumbling.
Amity hadn't realized it before but now she understood why Luz parked all the way in the back. The parking lot is full but in the back, it's completely empty and dark save for the bar's neon glow. Her heart rushes with sweet anticipation and once they make it to the car, Luz immediately pushes her against the car and fervently kisses her lips.
"Did you have fun?" She asks gently, kissing her all over the face like she's a baby.
"No," she says, an anxious tremble in her voice. "That was terrible. Never take me to one of these again."
"Aww, I'm sorry baby," she kisses her neck and Amity's mouth drops open at how good it feels. "Well...if I can make it up to you in any way…"
Amity knows she really shouldn't. The sooner she stops doing this, that's when she'll move on. she has to move on. She knows she's being used and yet...she can't stop.
Luz knows just how to press her buttons and make everything okay. She knows exactly how to make Amity do exactly what she wants. She knows how to make her feel like she's stuck.
"Let's do it," she whispers, pushing her flush against the car and Amity has to clutch onto Luz or else she'll lose her balance, she was weak in the knees for more than one reason now.
"Where?" She asks and she really, really hopes she doesn't say—
"In the car."
Amity gasps. "Luz, that isn't very sanitary and it's extremely—"
She cuts her off with another kiss and, goodness, she hates how that always works on her. Why is she so weak? She always tells herself that she's never going to let this happen again. It's so wrong and terrible and—"You know you want to."
"I...do," she stammers. "I really, really do."
"But?"
"I don't think we should do it in the car. In this parking lot," she gasps, Luz bites her skin right between her neck and shoulder.
"C'mon. It'll be fine, trust me." She moves to unlock the driver's door, leaving Amity alone and panting for air. Then she comes back and gives her a quick peck, hands around her waist to guide her away from the back door so she can open it. She climbs onto the small seat, scooting over as far as possible to make room for Amity. "You coming?" She laughs.
Amity ducks in thinking to herself, there's no way the both of them were going to fit comfortably on there but— still she was determined more than she was wary. After sitting down, she shuts the door behind her and then turns nervously to face Luz, who's already unzipping her pants. "How are we supposed to do anything?" She asks, genuinely confused.
Luz pats the empty space between them. "Put your legs up here."
Amity confusedly obeys and swings her legs up so her back is against the door and she's facing Luz entirely. And as if she weren't incredibly cramped enough, Luz crawls in between her legs, spreading them open. She feels the cool air and Luz pressing right up against her just right.
Really, she could stay like this forever if she wanted. With everything in her, she was going to enjoy this. Car sex. She's never even dreamed of doing this, she's never thought of herself as the type of person to do something so special in a car and yet it has this appeal to it that she finally understands. She really wants this, even if it's not real.
They kiss gently, affectionate and deep. Luz slips her tongue into Amity's mouth and she delightfully welcomes it— when they touch, she can taste the bitterness of the tequila and for a split second it takes her out of it. This really isn't Luz. She's very drunk and Amity is too but just slightly. At least she can string together one coherent thought while Luz seems to only have her mind set on one thing.
She finally tries it out and slips her hand under Amity's skirt. She gently strokes her through her soaked underwear and she moans into the kiss, readily melting underneath her. She thinks she's finally going to let herself finish this time, this is too good not to. She doesn't know how much longer she can control herself with Luz, she's too amazing.
But then Amity gets an idea and she reaches down to steady Luz's hand. "What's wrong?" She asks gently.
"I want to try something," she says, anxiously biting her lip. "Let me touch you?" She asks.
"I'm not important," she tries to brush it off but Amity stops her with a quick kiss.
"No, please," she whispers. "I want to make you feel good too."
Humming, she says, a bit unsure, "Okay. If you really want to…"
"Thank you," she gives her another kiss and then, "Okay, lay down."
Well, she does some weird rendition of laying down because the car is so small and her whole body just barely fits laying across the bench. With a bit of intricate maneuvering, Luz ends up on her back, shoulders pressed against the window and Amity sits on top to straddle her. She's never been on top before.
She feels so in control, on top of her like this. She's never been so turned on before in her life. She's going to torture her, like she always did to her. Finally, she's got her chance. Their bodies press flushed together on the tiny backseat, the pressure in just the right spot. It's so perfect. She's so perfect.
But she has to stay focused for just a little longer. She clears her throat with faux confidence, trying to assert her dominance because Luz seems completely unfazed that now she's the one at the bottom now. Just the thought of that makes Amity flushed.
Her eyebrows shoot up. "Before we do anything, we need to set down some ground rules." Amity says strictly.
"Okay." Is all she says. Damn her for being so smug. What, does she think she's too good for ground rules?
Amity groans but it doesn't deter her. In a moment, she would make her sorry. "We need to have a safe word," she says and she's relying heavily on that one shot of tequila she took. "I was thinking red light for stop.—" she looks down and there's an embarrassed tinge on Luz's cheeks. "What?"
"Noted. Continue."
"You have to respect the safe word. Got that?"
Luz nods and she sits up to remove her jacket. Laying back down against the window, Amity realizes that people can definitely see in here. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. Maybe she should call this off and go home.
But then Luz suddenly intertwines their fingers. It's a gentle and romantic gesture that makes Amity's heart flutter. She just wants to enjoy this moment before things get too heated. She wants to enjoy the quiet domesticity of this. She finally has Luz. She can do whatever she wants.
Amity shifts down so she's laying between Luz's legs, her thigh pressed perfectly between Amity's already wet crotch. But she ignores it because she wants to be closer. They kiss gently and this time Amity is the one to teasingly bite at her bottom lip. Their tongues slip together and Luz makes a needy little sound that shocks Amity. Checkmate.
Now Amity gets to trail kisses down her neck. She's never been the one to do it before. Luz moans again and she sympathizes because she knows how great it feels. She's never done anything like this to her. She never knew submissive Luz could be another one of her many twisted fantasies and yet…
She stops, resting her head on Luz's chest and they lay there quietly for a still while. It's such a perfect little piece of a moment that Amity knows she's never going to get again. It almost feels like they're actually together. Maybe they are? She doesn't really know.
"I love you," Amity whispers into her neck, her chest flushed with nerves but she says it just for the heck of it. She knows there aren't any mutual feelings going on here. Perhaps they're both in it for drastically different reasons. "Say it back."
"Damn, Blight. Don't do that to me." She brings a hand up to comb through Amity's mint hair. "I don't know. I can't think. I'm really drunk."
"I need to know how you feel about me." She says, even though she'd rather just keep living in her silly illusion that possibly, she does feel the same way. "Please."
"I love you. In a casual way. We're just casual, right?"
"...Yes."
"This is for fun. We're old enough to do what we want."
Even if she knew... it still stings a little to hear it out loud. She's trapped in a distant kind of sadness, or melancholy perhaps. This meant nothing to her, so why should Amity think of it as anything more than just casual? She doesn't know if they even have the same casual in mind. She doesn't…
Luz suddenly reaches down and grabs a handful of Amity's bottom and that immediately lights her on fire again, much to her annoyance. She doesn't even want to do this anymore. But she has to, to prove that this doesn't matter to her, either. And that simple touch makes her remember just how deliciously she's pressed up against her thigh and she's wearing a dress and her underwear—
She starts rolling her hips, she's lost all control over herself once again and all she wants is to feel her. Everywhere. She's embarrassed by how, if she wanted to, she could come just like this if she kept it up. But she needs to stay in control so with a steadying breath, she makes the grueling effort to stop grinding herself. "Red! Red light," she pants.
"What's wrong?" Her hand halts and Luz groans impatiently.
" I'm in control right now. You don't get to touch me remember?"
"Well hurry up! I've been waiting for you to do something and I'm getting impatient."
Amity sits up, shifting so she straddles her stomach and it gives her delightful access to Luz's crotch. "You have to be patient. If—" she gasps when she feels the new pressure of Luz's body underneath her hit just right. "If you aren't...then I'll have to punish you."
"You're grinding again," Luz deadpans and Amity quickly stops herself. "Come on. Hurry up," she whines. Amity relishes in the complete power she has now. She's got it back. With an elated giggle, she reaches behind her to teasingly splay her hand over her crotch. Luz lifts her hip to try and get some friction but Amity quickly pulls it away.
"Blight!" She hisses. "Come on! I don't do that to you."
"You make me feel like this," she tentatively reaches in her underwear and gives her a gentle stroke and Luz moans. "You make me feel so cheated and…" she stops when Luz moans again, much louder—it makes her crazy. "I always feel so...teased with you."
She slips her hand out and Luz squeezes her eyes shut. "Why do you do that to me?" Amity asks.
"Because you're so easy to do it to," she says breathlessly. "I like seeing you miserable."
" You make me miserable," Amity hikes up her skirt and shoves a hand down her underwear. She loves to be miserable, only for Luz. She gently strokes herself and moans loudly just to tease her.
"Fuck. Don't leave me hanging, Blight," she whispers, jerking her hips forward. She's losing focus again. Okay, she pulls her hand out of herself and reaches back to gently finger Luz again. She whines, much to her delectable delight. It sounds so good. She never knew this could be so good.
She doesn't want this to end.
Luz takes Amity's hand, the one she used on herself and puts it in her mouth. That's incredibly disgusting in theory but seeing it is really hot. She imagines the warmth of her tongue on her—"Ow!" She yelps when Luz bites down on her fingers. "Don't bite me." She scolds her and immediately stops stroking her.
"Nonono," she whines again. "I'm sorry, please—"
"You have to apologize."
"I'm sorry!" She says quickly, laughing a little. Amity gives her a look. " What ?"
"I think you deserve punishment for that." She says ominously.
"What are you gonna do?"
She lifts up a bit to reach under herself and grabs Luz's shirt, she pulls it all the way up until it's bunched under her neck and her bra is showing, in all of its plain white glory. Amity slips her hand under it and grabs her small, warm breast under there. Luz yelps and jerks her hips again. "Come on," she groans.
Without a word, Amity uses both hands to slowly pull her bra all the way up so that it's under her neck and her chest is completely exposed. Amity looks up to see Luz's eyes closed, her face burning hot with shame. "Not very big," Amity hums to put the cherry on top.
"Can you please…" she trails off quietly.
"No. I'm going to torture you like you torture me. And you're going to take all of it." She teasingly flicks her exposed nipple and Luz squeaks. "I want you to feel exactly how I feel all the time."
"How do you feel?" She asks in a strained voice when Amity sticks her fingers inside of her once again.
"I feel...terrible," she says. "And I don't want anything to do with you. But I keep letting you…" she gasps at the hand that Luz slips under her dress. "Stop. Ah—red light," she moans.
"Let me touch you," Luz begs. A desperate little moan when Amity pulls out again. "Don't stop."
"I'll stop as much as I want, because I'm in control." She reminds her sternly. "You're powerless."
"No I'm not," she says and—she's completely right. "You're still miserable."
"Because of you," Amity pulls her own shirt and bra up and Luz stares at her chest shamelessly. "Am I just an object to you?"
"Yeah, pretty much," she groans and Amity's heart drops. With an unprecedented anger, she shoves back inside of Luz with one hand and she gently strokes herself with the other. She doesn't stop. "You're just the girl I hate," she gasps, rocking her hips quickly to keep up with Amity's pace. "But someone's gotta put you in your place."
"I'm just a toy that you play with whenever you feel like it," she sighs, rocking to her own touch. She's so upset. This is so hot. She never wants to stop. She's finally going to come but not to Luz. Never to Luz. She's not going to give her anything else.
"You're a maniac," Luz starts to pant, she's breathless and sweating and she feels like she's going to burst. Amity feels her clench around her fingers but she keeps aggressively shoving and pushing because she hates Luz. She hates this stupid person and she wishes they never crossed paths. She feels like she could cry. "Stop it, you crazy bi—"
"Use the safe word." She says contentiously, keeps fingering and stroking. Luz groans and weakly tries to push her off.
"Red light," she sighs.
Amity immediately stops and they stare at each other for a jolting moment. Suddenly, Luz pulls her down and their lips meet in an aggressive makeout. It's lip biting and tongue warring to the third power and Amity really doesn't care anymore. She grinds herself against Luz's leg until she comes for the first time with her. It's not momentous, it's just another thing she's lost to her, another thing unrightfully given. "I don't want to do this anymore," she says weakly into her neck.
"Then don't." Luz says irritably. She doesn't know what she has to be mad about. Amity's the one who's lost everything, Luz has her and even if she wants to leave, she can't. She knows she won't.
"Take me home. Now." She shuts her eyes tight as tears burn down her cheeks. "And don't ever come near me again."
The drive back to her house is silent and jerky—Luz is still incredibly drunk but somehow they make it without a scratch. And as they pull away from yet another inevitable kiss, Amity says, "I love you," but Luz doesn't say it back.
She thinks she's okay with it.
