Oh geez so this one took longer than I had wanted it to but I think I have a very valid reason for that. See I'm moving at the end of this week and I've been basically spending all my time either working or packing or prepping and it made working on this chapter a bit of a challenge. Even so, I finally finished it and wow is it Bittersweet. I won't say much more about it other than I hope you enjoy! Let's get started!
Chapter 62: Farewell to the Wood
How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?
Despite how chaotic the party had been, the next few days are surprisingly peaceful and quiet. The lights travel back to the tower, where their main mission, at least for now, is to make sure Sora is as comfortable as he possibly can be, physically, mentally, and especially emotionally. To this end, each of them spends as much time as they can with him, while also trying to give him as much space as he might need. It's a difficult balancing act, and a challenge for just about all of them to gauge how they should act around him at any given moment without upsetting him in some way. They try their best to keep him from slipping too far into despair, while still letting him pour out his grief and fear whenever it becomes too much for him to bear. They try to get him to smile and laugh without making any kind of jokes at his expense. They try to keep his mind off of what's been happening to him while speaking of nothing but to each other whenever he's not within earshot.
And most difficult of all… they try to keep him distracted and unaware as they plan exactly how they're going to save him.
They hate to lock him out of the loop, to exclude him from something that he's at the very center of. But with how easily Xehanort might be able to spy on them and learn every last one of their secrets through his thirteenth vessel, they have no other options. So each time they meet in private, Riku tasks one or more of the lights to keep Sora busy in some way. And today, that light just so happens to be Naminé.
When Kairi comes to her asking her to spend the afternoon with Sora, Naminé silently wishes her somebody, or even any of the other lights really, would join her. Not that she doesn't want to be around Sora–certainly, she does, or at least she would if not for what had happened in Traverse Town. If not for the insane idea she'd so haphazardly suggested to him, if not for the very reason why she's been hesitant to even speak to him since he returned. If not for the empty promises she's made to him, both this time, and far too many others that he doesn't even remember.
He hasn't tried to bring it up to her since, but she knows it's only a matter of time before he does. And of course, it isn't long into their afternoon together when it happens. They've taken to one of the tower's lounges while the rest of the lights discreetly gather; Naminé preoccupies herself with drawing if only to avoid eye contact with Sora as he absently stirs his hot chocolate. An awkward sort of silence lingers between them, silence that Naminé only wishes she knew how to break. For as much as she might know about Sora and his memories, it seems as though she never knows exactly what to say to him when it matters most. She barely even knows how to interact with someone so important to her… someone who probably only sees her as a new acquaintance instead of a long-forgotten friend.
She's in the middle of drawing him when she happens to glance up from her sketchbook for just the slightest of seconds. He's staring right at her, the question all but burning in his intensely golden eyes. She draws in an unsteady breath, pressing her crayon harder against the page as she tries to focus on her art. That focus is all but shattered, however, when Sora finally asks that question aloud.
"...Hey, Naminé?" he begins, his voice small, apprehensive. "Can… can we talk about… about what you said before? You know, about… erasing my memories of everything that's happened?"
Naminé can't hold back the weary sigh that follows. She puts her sketchbook down, averting his heavy gaze the best she can as she tries to speak her piece as calmly and clearly as possible. "Sora, I… I never should have-"
"Could… can you do it?" he asks, the one question she'd been dreading most of all. The fact that this is something he actually wants, something he thinks he needs, when it's just about the last thing that will ever truly help him. "I don't… I-I can't keep dealing with all of this." His tears come quickly, his hands tightly gripping his mug to the point that his claws scratch its surface. "It's all so much–too much. Even now that Maleficent is finally gone, I-I can't stop thinking about what she did to me… I can't stop thinking about what the master might do to get me away from all of you. I'm so sad and scared all of the time, a-and I just… I hate it! I don't want to be like this anymore! I just… I… please, Naminé… Just… just take it all away… please…"
Naminé is nearly on the verge of tears herself after hearing all of this. She sighs again, her hand trembling as she reaches across the table to place it overtop of Sora's. She finally meets his gleaming golden gaze, her voice steady as she tells him the truth, knowing he deserves nothing less and wishing she could give him so much more. "I'm sorry, Sora… but… I can't…"
"B-but… but you said-"
"I know what I said," Naminé says, ashamed of such a rash mistake. "And… technically, I can do it, but… I shouldn't. Vanitas was right when he said wiping your memories won't change what's happening to your heart. You'd still look the way you do, you'd still be under Xehanort's power. You just… wouldn't know why. And neither would anybody else who wants to help you. But… you know who would remember everything? The Organization would. I can't interfere with their memories like I can for the lights. If I did this… well, it'd be just like the glamor spell Donald cast on you; nothing more than a temporary fix to a much bigger problem."
"I don't care!" Sora protests, rising from his seat. A few stray spikes rise with him, a testament to the anguish that Naminé knows she's painfully ill-equipped to truly heal him from. "I know I should be happy now that I'm back here with everyone, but I'm not, I can't be as long as I know what's coming. But… if I'm able to forget about that, even for just a little while, maybe I finally can be."
"You won't be," Naminé warns earnestly. "Trust me, Sora; messing with memories only leads to trouble. It did the last time I was forced to do this, and it definitely would if I did it again. Think about it: if the others lose their memories about what's happening to you, then all of the progress they've made in trying to help you will be completely undone. We'd be no closer to saving you than we were from the very start."
"W-well… can't you just erase my memories then?" Sora pleads. "The rest of them don't have to forget, they could-"
"They do," Naminé shakes her head. "It's either all or nothing. That's just how my powers work, Sora. I can't just impact your memories alone. And even if I could… I wouldn't. I know you think that erasing your memories would erase all of the pain you're feeling, but… that pain would come back sooner or later, it always does. And once it does, it'd be even worse because you wouldn't even know where it's coming from. I want to help you, Sora, so much, but… I can't, not like this." She stands, a few tears finally slipping down her cheeks as she approaches him slowly, wanting to hug him, though of course, her own nerves hold her back, just as they always do. "The only thing I can do is just… be here to offer you a shoulder to cry on…"
Sora takes that shoulder almost immediately, catching Naminé off guard as he suddenly steps forward and pulls her into a tight, desperate embrace. For as surprised as she is, she gently returns it, doing what she can to provide him the comfort he's so clearly craving right now. "Sometimes… I wish I had power over time instead of just memories," she says quietly as she continues to let him pour his grief out. "Because if I did, then I'd go back and undo every horrible thing you've been through. What's happened to you, Sora… it isn't fair and it isn't right. I know you might think you've done something wrong and that you deserve all of this, but you don't. Someone as kind and brave and good as you should never have to suffer the way you have. But even if none of us can change the past… at least we can all try to give you a better future…"
"I don't have a future…" Sora almost says, a miserable thought that's been lingering at the back of his mind for quite some time now. Because by all accounts, his master has already decided his future for him, a future he doesn't want, but has no choice but to accept. A future that he's not even sure his friends, for as courageous and hopeful as they all might be, can do anything to change.
But instead of telling Naminé any of that, he pulls back, wiping a few of his tears away as he offers her a wavering, largely fake smile. "Thanks…" he says, deciding to accept her final verdict. Realizing that she's right, in many ways, that taking away his memories wouldn't do a thing to take away the pain that plagues him inside and out each day. Nothing can, at this point. "I'm sorry for asking."
"It's ok," Naminé says warmly, patiently. "I shouldn't have ever suggested it in the first place. I guess that's something you and I have in common: we both tend to make some… pretty reckless decisions when we're stressed."
"You can say that again," Sora says with a small, yet genuine chuckle, one that Naminé is more than happy to share with him.
Their laughter soon comes to an end when a knock sounds at the door. "Hi, you two," Kairi enters with Axel trailing behind her. "How are you getting along in here?"
"Pretty good," Sora grins, hanging his arms behind his head. It's a surprising, but welcome sight to Kairi and Naminé alike, a glimpse, however small, of the Sora he used to be. The Sora that's still somehow miraculously there even despite all of the agony and hardships he's endured.
"Glad to hear it," Axel smirks, crossing his arms. "Sorry to interrupt, but you've got company."
"I do?" Sora asks, confused and curious. "Uh… who is it?"
"Just a few friends who decided to travel all this way to see you," Kairi's smile widens as she opens the door again. "Come on in, everyone."
Before they're even all fully through the door, almost every member of the Radiant Garden Restoration Committee gasps the second they see Sora. A handful of them, namely Yuffie and Aerith, rush forward to get a better look while Cid and Merlin hang back with worried frowns on their faces. Even Leon, usually so calm and collected, is obviously shocked by just how much Sora has changed over the course of just a few short months alone.
For his part, Sora is largely overwhelmed by all of the sudden attention. Not that he really gets to say a word in edgewise between the fretful greetings his friends have to offer him. "Oh my gosh, Sora!" Yuffie exclaims, bewildered. "Kairi told us you'd look different, but I had no idea you'd look this different! You even have a pair of cute little antennas now!" Sora's sudden discomfort is all but lost on her as she reaches forward to gently flick one of those antennas. When he flinches back in alarm, however, Aerith is quick to intervene.
"Yuffie," she puts a hand on her friend's shoulder, shaking her head. Even so, she offers Sora a small, encouraging smile. "It's good to see you, Sora. When we heard that you'd come back, we all wanted to come check in on you to see how you're doing."
"Uh… I'm doing… ok, I guess," Sora partially lies, knowing he hasn't really been 'ok' for a long time now.
He jumps somewhat though, when Leon places a firm hand upon his shoulder. "Kairi and Lea told us all about what's happening to you," he explains solemnly. "If you need anything from any of us, Sora, don't hesitate to let us know."
"Yeah, we're more than willin' to go toe-to-toe with those Organization chumps for ya, kid," Cid volunteers, the others all readily nodding their unflinching agreement.
"Yes, my boy," Merlin proclaims with a daring grin. "We'll be sure to make that cowardly codger Xehanort sorry he ever laid eyes upon you!"
"W-wow…" Sora forces another smile as he rubs his arm. "I… I don't know what to say. Thank you, everyone. But… I can't ask any of you to risk your lives after everything else you all already did for me a few months ago…"
"You didn't ask," Yuffie points out. "But we still wanna!"
"Just like how we wanted to help you when you were poisoned," Aerith adds, just as supportively. "We know we didn't have to, and you didn't ask back then either. But you're important to us, Sora. Of course we'd do anything we can for you."
"You may rough it up with all them Heartless and No-ones or whatever they're called, but like it or not, at the end of the day, you are just a kid," Cid notes, his tone genuinely concerned. "Even if you like to act like you're all big n' tough with that Keyblade of yours, there's no shame in accepting a little help when someone offers it to you."
Sora tenses when Cid fondly ruffles his already messy hair. Thankfully, Leon steps in to coax him back so he can finally get to the heart of the matter. "What Cid is trying to say is… we're here for you, Sora, just like we were before. To give you whatever kind of help you might need."
For what feels like the millionth time since he returned, Sora finds himself baffled by the immense, unshakable kindness of his friends. The lights vowing to stand by him is one thing, but the Restoration Committee isn't even really involved in his plight, they have no obligation to help him get through it, to even be here to support him at all. But here they are all the same, offering him their care and comfort and courage. Offering him far too much, as far as he's concerned. But for as much as he might want to, as much as he knows he should, Sora doesn't have it in him to tell any of them no again. Not when every one of their minds is so clearly made up.
"Oh! Speaking of help," Merlin pipes up, conjuring his magical bag into existence. "I just so happened to bring something special for you, Sora. Now, where did I put the blasted thing…?" The wizard rummages through his bag, peering into its impossibly endless depths. And in the process, pulling out a wide assortment of other items, from pots to potions to even a full tea set.
"Yeesh, gramps, what did ya bring the whole house with you?" Axel asks as the others share an amused laugh.
"Oh hush!" Merlin scolds his former student. "I know exactly what I'm looking for. In fact, it's right–aha! Here we are!" He pulls a thick book out of his bag, holding it out to Sora.
"Oh… this is…" he trails off as he takes the tome, a wave of bittersweet nostalgia hitting him as he stares at its cover. With everything that's been happening lately, he hasn't thought about the Hundred Acre Wood or any of his friends there in quite some time. But now that he's holding the book that they all call home, he fondly recalls the last time he'd been there with them, a time long before he'd fallen so far from the hero he once was. Speaking of that hero, he catches a glimpse of himself on the book's cover, Pooh Bear sitting by his side. It's strange, seeing himself the way he used to be before he'd become the hideous shadow he is now, seeing a smile on his face when they're so rare to come by now. Seeing who he still longs to be, even though he knows he never can again.
"We've all heard about how rough of a time you had while you were…. on the lamb, so to speak," Merlin says with an encouraging smile. "So I figured a visit to a peaceful world might do you some good," Now, of course, you're not required to venture in there if you're not feeling up for it, but-"
"No," Sora interjects, gripping the book just a bit tighter. "I'm glad you brought this. I want to see them again. I… I want to tell them goodbye…"
"Goodbye?" Kairi questions. "Sora, what are you…" She trails off when he glances her way, unable to speak the thought that's been weighing so heavily on his mind lately. But she quickly understands it all the same. It's something none of the lights have even wanted to consider, the chance, however small, that the Organization might win, that Sora might truly end up forced onto their side, that he might all but lose himself completely in the process. And if that does happen… then there would be so many friends scattered across so many different worlds that he'll never get to bid a proper farewell to, so many loose ends left untied. So many special connections so cruelly stolen from him before he can even say goodbye to any of them.
"Do… you want someone to go with you?" Kairi asks, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "Naminé and I could, if you'd like us to."
"No, I should be ok," Sora assures with a grateful nod. "But… can you do me a favor, Kairi? I usually use my Keyblade to get into the book, but… with the way my magic is now, I… I'm worried I might… you know, damage it somehow. So… could you…?"
"Of course," Kairi smiles as she summons her Keyblade. Sora hands the book over to Merlin, who holds it open to allow Kairi to conjure a gateway into its pages.
As Sora approaches that gate, he offers the others a small, somewhat uncertain smile. "Uh… see you guys in a bit, I guess."
"See you in a bit," Kairi replies warmly. Naminé, Axel, and the Restoration Committee echo that sentiment with bright smiles and fond waves, yet another reminder to Sora that, for some reason or another, they all came together to support him, to be there for him whether he expected them to or not. And by all accounts, he never expected anything close to the kind of unconditional care he's been getting from them.
But as he ventures into the book, he wonders if he'll still get that same kind of care from some other friends of his as well.
The Hundred Acre Wood is as peaceful and picturesque as Sora remembers it, despite his last visit being well over a year ago. A soft, warm breeze tousles the lush leaves of the trees, the sky as blue and clear as can be as birds and bees and butterflies float freely through it. It's a calming, serene atmosphere that does a good enough job of settling Sora's long-frayed nerves as he takes in a deep breath of the fresh air. When he opens his eyes, just a bit further on the path ahead he spots a familiar house built out of a familiar tree. And a familiar pair sitting outside in front of it.
"Pooh Bear!" Sora calls, grinning as he picks up his pace a bit. "Piglet! It's good to see you two."
"Oh, hello there," Pooh greets with a cordial, yet largely oblivious smile. "And who might you be, Somebody-I-Don't-Know?"
"Oh no, not again…" Sora groans, feeling an unwelcome sense of deja vu. "Pooh, it's me–Sora!"
"Sora?!" Piglet gapes up at the boy. "W-what happened to you? You look so… so different!"
"Hm… yes, you do look rather different, Sora," Pooh notes, thankfully recognizing him. And considering how much he's changed since the last time the bear saw him, Sora can't exactly blame him for taking a moment or so to do that. "Your ears have gotten much longer."
"Um… yeah, I guess they have…" Sora frowns, skimming the tip of one of his now-pointed ears.
"Oh, I mean your other ears," Pooh corrects, pointing to the top of his head.
"My other-" Sora cuts himself off when he reaches up to feel one of his antennae. Despite how embarrassing and unsightly that new feature is, Sora can't help but let out a small snort of a laugh at the misunderstanding. "Oh, no, Pooh, these aren't-"
"Why, your ears are nearly as long as Rabbit's now!" Piglet agrees, just as out of the loop as Pooh is.
"But they're not-"
"Who's making all this racket out here?" The door's house swings open to reveal an initially annoyed Rabbit. Though he scowls at the sight of Pooh and Piglet loitering outside of his home, his mood quickly shifts the moment he notices Sora standing alongside them. "Goodness! Sora, is that you?"
"Yeah," Sora sighs, knowing he should have expected such a reaction. Even still, it reminds him of just how strange, just how monstrous he looks all the same. "I'm-"
"Sora!" An excited call cuts through the conversation. Before Sora can even turn to where it came from, he's suddenly knocked to the ground by a familiar stripey friend. "Heya, Sora! Back for more bouncin', are ya?"
"Oh, hi, Tigger," Sora chuckles as he begins picking himself up off the ground.
"Hm…" Tigger perches a hand to his chin as he hops back a bit. "Say, somethin' seems differ-ant about you… But I can't quite put my paw on it…"
"Oh! I know!" Roo pipes up as he bounces out from behind Tigger. "His ears are longer!"
"C'mon, you guys," Sora protests, half amused and half beleaguered. "I keep telling you, these aren't-"
"Nah, that ain't it…" Tigger muses before gasping in realization. "Oh! Oh! I got it! Ya lost your tail!"
"Um… I never had a tail," Sora corrects, raising an eyebrow.
"You're probably thinking of me…" Eeyore says as he slowly hobbles over to the group. He peers at his backside, bereft of his elusive tail once more. "Looks like I lost it again… Probably got tired of stickin' to me all the time…"
"Aw, Eeyore, that's a shame," Sora says sympathetically. "Tell you what, we'll help you find it again, ok?"
"I don't wanna bother you, Sora…" Eeyore heaves his usual gloomy sigh. "But if you have the time…"
"We ought to have plenty of time for a great many things now that you're home, Sora," Pooh says, offering Sora a warm, contented grin.
"I'm… huh?" Sora asks, wanting to press the bear for what he means by that. He doesn't get the chance however, as Owl suddenly swoops in to join the others.
"Aha!" he exclaims as he lands. "I had detected that you'd stopped by for a visit, Sora, and of course, I was correct! My keen senses have never failed me yet."
"Are you sure you didn't just overhear all of us saying hello to him while you were flying by?" Rabbit asks flatly, crossing his arms.
Owl clams up, nervously glancing away as he quickly clears his throat to rebound. "Er, well, um… Say, Sora! Something seems rather… off about you…. If I didn't know any better, I'd say your ears have gotten longer!"
"Ok, ok," Sora puts his hands up, though he's quick to lower them when he sees some of the group finally taking notice of his claws. "I guess I should explain why I look like this. Um…" he hesitates as he looks over the curious glances they're all sending his way. The denizens of the Hundred Acre Wood are innocent to a fault, something that Sora is well aware of after his numerous visits there. Their world is a perfectly peaceful one, the worst problems they have to worry about ranging from an abnormally blustery day to a hunt for honey to satisfy Pooh's endless hankering for it. So how can he possibly explain a concept like Organization XIII to them? How can he tell them about the darkness that's been poisoning his heart and body alike? How can he describe just how scared he is, how miserable he is, how he's only here in the first place to offer each of them one final goodbye?
However, in light of his apprehensive silence, the others are quick to jump upon the chance to exchange their theories behind his appearance in his stead. "D-did you spill paint on your hair?" Piglet guesses.
"And ink on your arms?" Rabbit adds quizzically.
"Are ya turnin' into a Jugular?" Tigger proposes dramatically.
"Or a Heffalump?" Owl asks with equal zeal.
"Or a Woozle?" Eeyore finishes with the exact opposite of zeal.
"Uh…" Sora rubs the back of his neck, absolutely lost. "I don't-"
"Are you sick?" Roo asks, and out of all of the other outlandish ideas the others have, that's the one Sora decides to jump on.
"Uh… yeah!" he exclaims, knowing it's something of a lie. And yet, strangely, in many ways, it isn't a lie at all. "I'm, um… sick, I guess. It's really not that big a deal though, I'm fine-"
"What are you sick with, Sora?" Pooh ponders, clearly worried.
"A cold?" Piglet asks.
"The measles?" Owl suggests. "The mumps?"
"The turkey-pox?" Tigger adds.
"Chicken pox," Rabbit corrects.
"Whuh? You're tellin' me chickens can get 'em too?"
"I don't have any of that," Sora interjects with a small, genuine chuckle. He quickly sobers up though, still struggling to explain his condition. Struggling to tell any of them just how much trouble he's truly in. "To be honest, it's… not that kind of sickness. It's more like-"
"Oh dear!" Owl suddenly gasps, apparently distraught. "It appears as though I lost my precious lucky feather! I'm simply not myself without it! I believe I dropped while flying above the glade over there; Sora, could you do this old bird a favor and search for it for me?"
"Oh, uh… ok?" Sora shrugs, not thinking much of such a request. After all, taking care of simple favors for his friends is something he's more than used to doing whenever he visits the Hundred Acre Wood. "I'll see if I can find it. What's it look like?" Owl doesn't answer outside of holding one of his wide wings out, nodding knowingly toward it. "Ah, right," Sora grins, somewhat embarrassed. "I'll be right back."
"I didn't know you had a lucky feather, Owl," Pooh notes as Sora walks off.
"You have so many other feathers," Roo adds, confused. "Couldn't you just pick one of those to be your new lucky feather?"
"There is no such thing as a lucky feather," Owl informs the group, dropping his voice down to a whisper as soon as Sora is out of earshot. "I just wanted to keep the lad busy so we could discuss the gravely serious matter at hand here!"
"And what matter might that be?" Rabbit asks dubiously.
"Didn't you hear what Sora said?" Owl asks as the group huddles in close. "He said he has 'Nothatkinda' sickness! While fortunately not contagious, it's a dreadful malady that ravages the body and the mind! And he has all of the symptoms of it too; longer ears, pale hair, sharp fingers–why, I'd say the boy is in the final stages of Nothatkinda!"
"Oh no!" Piglet exclaims, aghast.
"Poor Sora…" Roo frowns sympathetically.
"Now, hold on just a minute!" Rabbit interjects, eyeing Owl skeptically. "How exactly do you know so much about this so-called 'Nothatkinda' sickness, hm?"
"Well, my dear Uncle Antonio succumbed to it many years ago, of course!" Owl retorts pointedly. "Or was it my second cousin Gertrude…? Either way, we must do something to rid Sora of it, before it's too late!"
"So how does somebody get rid of this, uh… No-kindo-sickness?" Tigger asks, scratching his head.
"That's just the thing–there is no known cure," Owl explains. "But if we could discover one, then not only would we be able to help Sora, we'd make medical history!"
"I would very much like to help Sora feel better," Pooh is the first to volunteer.
"S-so would I!" Piglet pipes up.
"Yeah, me too!" Roo readily raises his hand.
"You don't even gotta ask me!" Tigger grins enthusiastically. "We'll get Sora healed up in no time!"
"I won't be much help, but I'll do what I can…" Eeyore mumbles.
"But where are we even supposed to start?" Rabbit asks, frowning.
"Finding some sort of remedy to Nothakinda will certainly take some time," Owl muses. "My recommendation is that we split up so that each of us can research a different cure. The more ideas we have to try out, the better, I say!"
"Oh! I think I have just the thing!" Rabbit exclaims, hopping out into his garden.
"I got a pretty snazzy idea too," Tigger smirks as he bounces toward the nearby woods.
"I'll go talk to Mama," Roo adds as he heads for home. "She always knows how to make me feel better when I'm sick–I bet she can help Sora too!"
"I'll stay here and try to think of something…" Eeyore plops down to take a seat on the ground. "It likely won't be a very good idea though…"
"What can we do to help Sora, Owl?" Piglet asks, curious.
"Perhaps a smackerel of honey would do the trick," Pooh suggests.
"No, no, no," Owl shakes his head. "We need real solutions here, Pooh–honey is not enough to cure something as severe as Nothakinda. But you and Piglet can certainly help by taking care of Sora in the meantime while the rest of us work on our remedies. Just–don't mention to him that we know about his illness. From what I've heard, Nothakinda patients can be quite… defensive."
"Oh, so we'll surprise him by helping him feel better!" Piglet infers, smiling.
"That sounds like a lovely surprise," Pooh cheerily agrees. "Almost as lovely as a full pot of honey."
"What does?"
The conversation grinds to a complete halt as the small group that's left turns to see Sora returning. Upon receiving only startled looks and no real answer to his question, he rubs his arm, awkwardly changing the subject. "Uh, sorry, Owl, I couldn't find your lucky feather."
"Lucky feath–oh yes, well," Owl clears his throat, waving his wing dismissively. "Never mind all that right now. I was just asking Pooh and Piglet here if they could help me with a certain… project I've been working on at home."
"No, you weren't," Piglet corrects obliviously. "You were asking us to take care of-"
He's abruptly silenced as Owl swoops in to cover his mouth just in the nick of time. "T-take care of that project! Would you care to join us, Sora?"
"Ok," Sora shrugs, always glad to help any of his friends here. "Oh, but wait, we were supposed to look for Eeyore's tail…"
"Don't worry about it…" Eeyore says, not moving from his spot on the ground. "I'd probably just end up losing it again anyway…"
"Precisely," Owl agrees as he hastily begins urging the others onward. "Now, come along, boys! There's work to be done!"
"And delicious honey to eat," Pooh adds, patting his stomach.
"Do you ever think about anything else other than honey, Pooh?" Sora asks, smirking down at the bear.
Pooh simply shakes his head, a contented grin on his face as they begin down the path through the woods. "What else is there to think about?"
"So what's this 'project' anyway?" Sora asks as he follows the others into Owl's treehouse. While he stays close to the entrance alongside Pooh and Piglet, Owl hurries into his kitchen, busying himself with rapidly rooting through his cupboards and pulling out a wide assortment of seemingly random items.
"A study in aromatherapy!" Owl exclaims excitedly.
"...Aroma-huh?" Sora frowns, exchanging a confused glance with Pooh and Piglet.
"Aromatherapy," Owl repeats, beckoning his guests over to the kitchen. "Or, simply put, healing through the use of scents."
"Y-you mean you can make somebody feel better just by having them smell something?" Piglet asks quizzically.
"Indeed," Owl nods, winking at Pooh and Piglet to imply that this is his plan to help Sora. Not that either of them are able to get his message from that alone. "Say, Sora, why don't you lend me a hand by testing a few of these items I've gathered here out?"
"Um, sure," Sora steps a bit closer. "So you just want me to smell all this stuff? Sounds easy enough…"
He starts with the first item he spots on the table, an orange, to be exact, giving it a small whiff while the others, particularly Owl, watch on expectantly. "Well?" he asks, eager for results.
"Well… it definitely smells like an orange," Sora replies, not really knowing what answer Owl was hoping for. He tries another one of the items, a loaf of bread, largely to get the same underwhelming result–nothing. "I'm sorry, I'm confused," Sora says after testing a largely scentless glass of water. "What are we trying to figure out with all this?"
"Owl wants us to find a cure," Pooh explains, not noticing Owl's panicked expression upon hearing this.
"A cure for what?" Sora asks, raising an eyebrow.
"A-A… a cure for just about anything, really!" Owl rebounds just in time. "You never know what could be the next miracle-remedy of the century, after all."
"But how is just smelling something supposed to-"
"There will be plenty of time for questions later," Owl rebuffs as he shoves a potato in Sora's face. "For now, smell this! I hear potatoes are natural healers! Or was that tomatoes…?"
Despite his continued confusion, Sora complies, more than a bit overwhelmed by all of the food he's being forced to smell for more reasons than one. Even after a few days back with the lights, back to having regular, healthy, filling meals on a daily basis, he still finds himself occasionally worried that those familiar hunger pangs will rise again. That something will happen and he'll be left without anything to eat, left to starve just as he did for so many miserable weeks on the run. And even now, in a place as idyllic as the Hundred Acre Wood, he can't help but fear the same thing, to the point that he essentially has to control himself when Owl presents him with a perfectly ripe apple or a bowl full of freshly-picked carrots. And yet, for as much restraint as Sora is forcing himself to have, another one of Owl's house guests isn't quite as disciplined when it comes to the allure of his favorite treat.
Pooh only glances away from the scene in the kitchen for a moment, but it's more than enough for him to spot the conspicuous pot sitting high atop Owl's bookshelf. A pot clearly labeled to be holding the most prized snack of them all: honey. Unable to resist getting just a nibble, the bear wanders over to the bookcase as the smelling-session in the kitchen continues, reaching for the pot, only to find that it's much too high up. Owl doesn't even notice as Pooh begins stacking books to create a makeshift ladder, in favor of presenting Sora with more random objects for his 'aromatherapy' experiment.
"Try this ginger root next, and this jar of olives!"
"Ah-" Sora draws in a sudden sharp breath, something that's all but lost on Owl as he almost hectically continues.
"How about these daisies? Lilac? Pansies?"
"Ah-ah-"
"Peaches! Plums! Persimmons!"
"Um… Owl?" Piglet pipes up, realizing what's about to happen here. Though as manic as Owl has gotten with his approach, he doesn't dare think of slowing down now. And neither does Pooh as he's nearly reached the coveted pot of honey, almost within reach.
"Parsnips! Paprika! Oh! I know! Black pepper-"
"ACHOO!"
Unable to hold it back any longer, Sora lets loose a large, loud sneeze. It not only sends several of the items Owl had gathered flying, but it also startles Pooh from his unsteady tower of books. That tower comes toppling over, taking most of the contents of the bookcase with it, including the pot of honey the bear had been after. As Pooh lands amidst the mess, the pot drops down squarely on top of his head, succinctly getting stuck there as he makes his initial observation.
"Oh bother… Owl, it appears that you're all out of honey…" he sighs, clearly disappointed by the empty pot.
"Oh no…" Sora frowns, admittedly guilty as he surveys the wreckage he's partially responsible for. "I'm so sorry, Owl. We can help you clean all this up if you-"
"Oh nonsense!" Owl exclaims as he suddenly starts pushing his guests toward the door. "There's no time for that. I've much more research to do! For now, off with the three of you while I continue my studies. I'll report whatever I find posthaste!"
And with that, Owl closes the door behind them, intent on furthering his bizarre aromatherapy research in solitude. While Pooh and Piglet don't think much of his odd behavior, Sora can't help but be more than a bit bewildered by what just happened. "Ok… that was… weird," he notes to the accompanying pair as he removes the pot still covering Pooh's head. "Does Owl usually get that… enthusiastic about his research?"
"Oh no," Pooh says. "Usually he's much more excited about it."
"...Wow," Sora blinks, unable to say much else on the matter.
"Oh, Sora!" A call from the ground catches the group's attention. They peer down from the treehouse to find Kanga waiting at the bottom, with Roo offering them a wave from his spot in her pouch. "Could you come down here please? I've got something for you."
"Hey, Kanga," Sora greets after descending the ladder, Pooh and Piglet not far behind. "What's up-" He's abruptly cut off as Kanga suddenly hops up to his level, shoving a spoonful of… something straight into his mouth. He gags at the bitter taste of the liquid, but swallows it all the same, even though he's not entirely sure he should. "Gah… what was that?" he asks as he tries to catch his breath.
"It was medicine!" Roo exclaims brightly.
"Roo told me you were feeling a bit under the weather," Kanga explains. "So I thought a bit of my home-made medicine would help. It cures colds and coughs and flus and fevers and aches and allergies, and well, just about everything!"
"Uh… thanks?" Sora says, still quite confused. "But I already told everyone else that I'm not that kind of sick."
"Don't worry, Sora," Pooh interjects. "We already know."
"Pooh!" Piglet scolds, glancing back up at Owl's house to issue the bear an unspoken reminder of what not to say.
"Oh, that's right," Pooh corrects himself, albeit far too late. "I mean–we don't know."
"Uh… huh," Sora muses, unsure of what to make of such an odd exchange. Or rather, of how strangely all of his friends here have been acting altogether.
"Hm… the medicine should be working by now…" Kanga notes, glancing between Sora and the bottle in her hand. "Maybe you need another dose-"
"Uh, n-no, thanks, Kanga," Sora quickly rejects her offer, not too keen on getting a second taste.
"Yowch!"
"What was that?" Sora asks, turning toward the nearby woods, where a stark, somewhat pained shout just echoed.
"I-it sounded like Tigger!" Piglet infers, worried.
"He sounds like he's in trouble," Sora says, already making a beeline for the woods. "We should go check on him. C'mon!"
"Be careful, boys!" Kanga calls as she and Roo see Sora, Pooh, and Piglet off. "I'll see if I have any other medicine at home. Try not to get any sicker in the meantime, Sora!"
"Um… you got it?" Sora sends her a befuddled thumbs-up, still largely at a loss for what she means. Even so, now isn't the time to press for answers as he hurries for the forest, Pooh and Piglet trailing after him as fast as their shorter legs can carry them. Fortunately, it doesn't take them too long to find Tigger, and when they do, they immediately notice that he's in a rather peculiar predicament.
"Whoa! Tigger, are you ok?" Sora asks as he hurries over to him. By all accounts, Tigger appears to be fine… save for the rather large stone resting squarely on top of his long tail.
"Tiggers are always a-ok," he assures with a smile that's quick to disappear. "But, uh… I'd be a little better if my bouncin' tail weren't inca-pacertated."
"Here, let's get that off of you," Sora doesn't hesitate to roll the rock away with a little help from Pooh and Piglet. "What are you doing out here anyway?"
"I was collectin' a whole bunch of rocks," Tigger explains, pointing the impressive pile of pebbles and stones he's accumulated.
"What for?" Pooh inquires.
"For touchin', of course!" Tigger hops to his feet as soon as Sora finishes pushing the stone off his tail. "They say if ya touch the right kinda rock, it can fix anything that ails ya. And I'm out here tryin' to find that special magicy stone."
"Well… maybe we can help you find it," Sora suggests with a small smile. "What's this rock supposed to look like?"
"I… dunno," Tigger replies honestly. "But I betcha it's one of these I found for sure! You wanna test 'em out for me, Sora?"
"Eh… I don't know if I should be testing anything else out after what happened back at Owl's place…" Sora winces, though Tigger places a small rock in his hands all the same.
"Hm, how's this one?" he asks, glancing Sora over. "Ya feelin' better yet?"
"I already feel fine," Sora says as he hands the rock back over to Tigger.
"Oof, Owl wasn't kidding about that whole de-nile thing…" he mutters before passing another stone over to Sora. "What about this one? I had a good feelin' about it from the moment I found it in the stream!"
"Um… still nothing, I guess," Sora shrugs, though he can't help but smile in amusement as Pooh hands him the next rock.
"Here you go, Sora," he says, lifting a rock that's large enough for Piglet to sit upon–complete with Piglet already perched upon it. "I prefer honey over rocks, but this one does look delectable. Perhaps a small taste might be just what you need."
"What?" Sora chuckles. "Pooh, you're so silly. I'm not gonna eat a rock; pretty sure my teeth wouldn't survive that, no matter how sharp they are now."
"Yeah! These ain't for eatin' anyway–they're for touchin'!" Tigger asserts as he turns back to his rock pile. "Now, lemme see what else we got here…"
Though he's still not sure what the purpose of this strange exercise is, Sora stands by patiently for another "magical" rock to inspect. However, for as willing as he is to play along with his easygoing, innocent friends, he soon notices something that all but makes him freeze stiff. Within the shadows of the woods, he spots a sinister silhouette, one that he recognizes all too well of someone in a tell-tale black coat. His throat closes up, his eyes go wide and his mind races as he tries to figure out how in the world they could have followed him here, how they could dare to come after him in the one real place of peace he had left. As he fearfully wonders what they might do to his dear friends here just to get to their final turncoat vessel.
He can't even get so much as a word of warning out as he takes a heavy step back, his entire body trembling. He's only brought back to reality however, when he hears Tigger gasp–not from the fear he should have over who's discreetly watching them all, but rather, from excitement. "Wowee! Now those are some rocks!"
"Huh?" Sora blinks, finally tearing his gaze away from the unknown Organization member. What he finds surrounding him, however, is something that's almost every bit as terrifying. He hadn't even noticed the array of shimmering black spikes rise up in response to his fear, but here they are all the same, as damming and dreadful as they always are. Not that any of his friends here seem to think so.
"Ooo, I-I've never seen rocks like this before…" Piglet stares up at one of them, fascinated as it towers high over him.
"They most certainly look magical," Pooh agrees, equally amazed.
"Boy, I'll say!" Tigger proclaims, abruptly grabbing Sora's hand. "Sora! You gotta touch one of these glowy rocks A-S-P-P!"
"W-wait!" Sora tries to pull away, stealing another anxious glance back at the woods. Only to find that the "Organization member" he thought he'd seen… is nothing more than a bizarrely shaped tree. "What…?" he mutters, bewildered. He's hardly comforted in being proven wrong, however, as Tigger places his hand against one of the spikes. He's touched them a handful of times before, but each instance has hardly been a pleasant one. He can feel the sheer, concentrated darkness they're composed of each time he so much as skims them, their power pulling through him, practically begging him to make more. Suffice to say, it achieves the exact opposite of the healing effect Tigger is looking for as he starkly pulls away, not just from the rocks, but from his friends.
"I-I…" he trails off as he stares back at the spikes. They look so incredibly out of place as they scar the scenic landscape of the Hundred Acre Wood, a place so completely untouched by darkness and destruction. By the very things he's come to carry with him everywhere he goes. And as he looks at them, he realizes how out of place he must look here in a world he'd once felt so at home in, surrounded by such kind, yet simple friends with such peaceful, simple lives. He's like a weed growing in a field of blooming buds, like a hurricane swelling amidst a perfectly sunny day. And just like he'd been when he returned to the lights a few days ago, he's nothing more than a stranger to anyone he'd once been so close to. To anyone who might have gotten to know whoever he used to be before, whoever he can barely even remember being at all now.
"Yeesh, this is worse than we thought…" Tigger mutters to Pooh and Piglet, aside.
"W-what should we do now?" Piglet asks fretfully.
"Eh… try takin' him over to Rabbit's," Tigger suggests. "He's bound to have some kinda re-mold-ey that could help."
Pooh is the first to follow through on this idea as he wanders over to Sora, not noticing the rising distress the boy is in as he tries and fails to send his hideous spikes away. "Sora, could you come with me and Piglet back to Rabbit's house? I'd like to see if he has any honey he could spare."
"Ooo, that's a good cover Pooh's got there," Tigger notes to Piglet.
"I-I don't think that's a cover," Piglet smirks. "Pooh is just hungry for some honey–he always is."
"Um… I'm sorry, Pooh," Sora turns away, gripping his arms loosely. "But I think I should get going…"
"You're leaving already?" Pooh asks, his usual soft smile disappearing. "I'd like it very much if you stayed instead."
Sora pauses upon hearing this, genuinely surprised as he looks back at Pooh. "You… you would?"
Pooh nods. "I tend to miss you too much when you go away. Whenever there's a rumbly in my tummy, I know that I'm missing honey. But when you're far from home, Sora, I feel like I'm missing something here instead," the bear points to his chest, or rather, to his heart. And all at once, Sora understands.
"Oh… that's what you meant when you said I was 'home'…" Sora infers, suddenly feeling quite selfish for wanting to leave. Selfish for always being the one who runs and hides whenever he can't handle something, selfish for always leaving someone he cares about behind when he does. "...Ok, I… I guess I can stay for a little longer…" he concedes, reaching down to take the hand Pooh offers him.
"Hooray!" Piglet cheers as he runs to join the pair as they begin down the path out of the woods. All the while, Pooh is beaming, a smile Sora can't help but share as he wonders if this is how his friends had felt when he returned to them. And at the same time, he wonders why he'd kept Pooh waiting for him anywhere near as long as he has.
When the trio arrives back at where they'd started, they're not surprised to find Rabbit hard at work in his garden. He puts the breaks on his harvest, however, as soon as he notices who's come to call upon him. "Ah! Sora! You're just in time!" he waves the group over. "I've just picked a handful of fresh herbs that I'd love for you to sample."
"You mean… test them out?" Sora asks, hesitant to try yet another test. "Uh… I would but… why don't you have Pooh do it instead?"
"Because he's already busy raiding the stash of honey I thought I'd hidden well enough this time…" Rabbit sighs, disgruntled as he peers over at his house. Sure enough, Pooh's tracked down a pot of honey stuffed into his mailbox, and has found a spot next to Eeyore to enjoy it from.
"Well… what about Piglet?" Sora asks, lightly nudging him forward.
"Oh, uh… w-well, I-"
"H-he's allergic! To all of them," Rabbit lies hastily when Piglet can't come up with anything. "And I can't do it because… well, I grew them. I need an impartial opinion. I need your opinion, Sora."
"...Well, ok," Sora relents, hoping that this 'test' will go better than the others. "So how should I 'test' them anyway?" he eyes the basket of leafy greens Rabbit has gathered dubiously. "Don't tell me you just want me to just eat them like that… do you?"
"Oh, gracious, no!" Rabbit laughs as he begins heading back over to his house. "I'm going to grind them up and brew them into a tea for you. In the meantime, could you please keep Pooh from making off with any more of my honey? It's getting harder and harder to keep it in stock with him around…"
"Now that I can do," Sora smirks as he and Piglet head over to the constantly hungry bear. "Hey, Pooh? Do you think maybe you could-"
"Oh, Sora," Pooh smiles as he shoves his already honey-covered hand back into the pot. "Would you care for a smackerel of delicious honey? I know it always helps me feel better when I'm not feeling my best."
"Uh… no, thanks, Pooh," Sora replies, a bit confused by how he'd presented that offer. "I know how much you like it–I don't want to take any of it from you. But after this pot, you can't take any more of it from Rabbit, ok?"
"Where can I get honey from then?" the bear inquires after another bite.
"Uh… I don't know, maybe an empty beehive?" Sora suggests, leaning down a bit to his level. "Here's an idea; after I try Rabbit's tea, we can go look for some. And we can look for Eeyore's lost tail while we're at it too."
"I don't want to trouble you while you aren't feeling well…" Eeyore says, all but forgetting what Owl had instructed them all to do earlier.
"Not feeling–why does everyone keep saying stuff like that?" Sora asks, determined to finally get some answers. "I keep telling you guys, I feel just fine!"
"But you said you were sick!" Tigger pipes up as he bounces over to join the group.
"I know I said that, but I didn't really-"
"Owl told us not to say anything," Roo says as he hops in after Tigger. "But we've been trying to help you feel better all day!"
"...Wait, is that what you all have been doing?" Sora asks, lost and slightly amused. "With the rocks, and the medicine, and-"
"Don't forget about aromatherapy!" Owl flies in, a large sack tied to his back. "I've brought plenty more scents for you to sample, Sora. And if these don't work, we can always find more; whatever it takes to heal you from that dreadful Nothakinda sickness!"
"...From what?" Sora blinks, even more lost than he'd been before.
"Ya know, Nothakinda sickness," Tigger repeats. "That's what ya said you had, didn't ya?"
"No?" Sora raises an eyebrow. "I said I… wasn't that kind of… ohhhhh." He facepalms, unable to stop himself from bursting into a sudden, heavy bout of genuine laughter. In fact, it's the most he's laughed in a very long time, born from a situation that's so silly, so utterly ridiculous that he can't help but find it hilarious. Even if the humor he finds in it is largely lost on his earnestly worried friends.
"W-what's so funny?" Piglet asks.
"You guys are!" Sora replies between bright chuckles. "This whole thing is just one huge misunderstanding. I'm not actually 'sick' at all."
Suddenly, the denizens of the Hundred Acre Woods are the ones who are lost as they all exchange a mutually baffled glance. "You're not?" Roo asks, struggling to understand as much as the others are. "But why'd you tell us that you were?"
Sora's laughter starts to slow down at this, turning a touch more awkward and apprehensive as he rubs the back of his neck. "Well, I-I… I just didn't really know how to tell you all that I'm-"
"Are you positive that you're not sick?" Owl presses, eyeing him critically. "It could be that perhaps even you don't know how ill you really are!"
"N-no, I… I definitely do know how bad off I am…" Sora admits, his laughter dead and gone. His smile has likewise shifted into returning woe, woe that slips into every word of what he has to say next. "And… I know that… that what's happening to me is… well, it's something that can't be cured…"
A ripple of concern passes over his friends, concern that's palpable enough to prompt Pooh to set his honey pot aside so he can step over to Sora. "Perhaps… we could still find a way to cure you all the same?" he suggests with a small, yet hopeful smile.
"Yeah!" Tigger bounces excitedly. "Even if the magic rocks didn't work, there's gotta be somethin' out there that can fix ya all up!"
"There isn't," Sora insists, remembering his master's devastating words well. "I've already tried everything I can. I know you all just want to help me, but… there's nothing you can do."
"Oh nonsense," Owl protests. "For any problem, there's always a solution for those hearty enough to look for it."
"Yeah, and we're as hearty as it gets!" Roo proclaims before whispering to Tigger, aside. "Uh, what does hearty mean anyway?"
"It means we're true-blue, ready-steady, sure-fire cure-finders!" Tigger exclaims confidently. "And that means that we're gonna be the ones to find a cure for ya, Sora!"
"But I already told you," Sora tries to counter. "You can't-"
"M-maybe the tea Rabbit is brewing will help," Piglet suggests.
"It won't-" Sora tries, but once again, he's drowned out. Once again, he's faced with a crowd that refuses to give up on him, even long after he already has.
"Or another spoonful of Mama's medicine!" Roo adds encouragingly.
"You guys-" For as kind as their intentions are, he can't help but be frustrated by them. Why won't he just take him at his word? They don't even know half of what's happening to him, how could they possibly think that anything any of them might do could have a chance at saving him? How could they possibly think he's even worth all this effort in the first place?
"I've got it!" Owl pipes up. "Instead of aromatherapy, we should try acupuncture! I'm sure to have a few knitting needles lying around we can use…"
"Just… hold on-" Everyone thinks they know how to help him, everyone thinks they know what he needs. From his friends here, to the guardians of light, to even the Organization in a twisted, backhanded way. They all have their own ways of trying to divert his course, trying to change his fate, to alter his future. To take any and all options out of his hands entirely.
"I'll try to come up with a good idea sooner or later…" Eeyore adds, far from as excitable as all of the others.
"You guys aren't listening to me-" They're not, the lights aren't, the Organization isn't, nobody is. Nobody cares about what he thinks or what he has to say. Nobody thinks he should have any kind of say, that he should make any sort of decisions for himself. And the worst part is, that he probably shouldn't have that right; because every time he makes a decision on his own–from stealing the oracle, to taking the rift, to even just running away from his friends–each and every last one of his decisions… has been wrong.
"I still think a good smackerel of honey would do wonders," Pooh points out as he reclaims his half-empty pot.
"Everyone, please-" It's too much, it's all too much. They all want to do too much for him, everyone either wants to help him or hurt him far more than they should. It's too much for his bruised and battered heart to take, too much for him to try and understand how he got here in the first place. Too much to come to terms with what's really happening to him, too much to realize how little time he truly has left.
"But whatever solution we find, one thing is certain," Owl concludes. And all the while, just about everyone is oblivious to the subject their conversation is centering on, none of them see Sora grip the sides of his head, his antennas curling tightly against his skull, his expression wrenched in rising distress. "We simply cannot rest until Sora is better-"
"Just STOP it already!" Sora's sharp, and sudden shout shatters the circulating suggestions altogether. As his angry voice hitches, several spikes shoot up all around him, an aura of visible darkness blooming around his entire body in response to his negative emotions. He lets himself stew in that anger for a moment or two, his eyes tightly shut, his hands curled into tight fists at his sides as he takes in several heavy breaths. When he opens his eyes, he briefly expects to find the guardians of light, expects that he'll have to apologize to them for yet another unexpected outburst, that he'll have to spend the next day or week or year or so wallowing in shame. But when he does open them… the lights aren't who he finds.
He finds himself standing in front of all of his friends in the Hundred Acre Wood instead.
He gasps, catching himself back in the present. They all stare at him with wide-eyed, questioning gazes, several of their jaws dropped, though none of them say a word. They don't seem to be afraid, but Sora harbors plenty of fear in their stead. Fear of what he's just done, how they might react, fear of himself that never seems to go away, fear that only gets worse with every last awful mistake he keeps on making.
And just like everything else he does on repeat, he keeps that same cycle going in what he does next. He doesn't apologize, mostly because his mouth refuses to move to let him speak. He doesn't explain himself, doesn't try to make any of this right. Instead, he does the only thing he's good at when he finds himself backed into a corner, when all eyes are resting solely on him, when all else fails.
He runs.
Sora turns on his heel and hurries off into the woods surrounding Rabbit's house. As stunned as the others all are, none of them follow him immediately, though one of them does take at least a few steps after him all the same. "...Sora?" Pooh calls softly, worry, or perhaps something far deeper than it, startling to settle over him for his friend.
At that same moment, Rabbit emerges from his house, a steaming hot cup of tea in his hands and a proud, oblivious grin upon his face. "Here you are, Sora! Some freshly-brewed herbal t-" He stops short upon noticing the shocked expressions of his friends, as well as the glaringly black spikes tearing up his pristine yard. Not to mention the sudden absence of someone very special to them all. "Um… what did I miss?"
He sits alone on a hill, his back pressed up against a tree, his knees pulled tight to his chest. Between his claws, he carefully holds a dandelion he'd picked, watching as the light breeze carries its seeds away. He can't help but feel a strange sense of solidarity with that dandelion as it eventually, inevitably loses all of its seeds. Just like he has eventually, inevitably lost everything he once held so tightly onto too.
He doesn't know why he keeps doing this, why he keeps putting himself into these kinds of situations. He can't control himself–he never can, and whenever he inevitably loses that control, of his emotions, of his powers, of his life, someone suffers. Sometimes, it's those around him, but usually, he's the one who's making himself suffer most of all. He's the one who slips up, who loses his temper, who refuses to let anyone help him when he so sorely needs it. He's the one who runs and hides instead of staying calm and communicating. He's the one who can't even spend a single day with old friends without ruining everything for everyone.
He should leave, he knows he should. He came to say goodbye to everyone here, but because of his outburst, now he won't even get a chance to do that much. After how he acted over each of them simply wanting to help him, he doesn't even feel worthy of showing his face in front of them. For all of the upheaval and chaos his very presence alone has brought such a sweet, serene world, he should never even be allowed to slip into the pages of this place ever again. He doesn't belong here anymore, he doesn't belong in this wood, in this world–
He doesn't belong in this story… or any other.
"Hello, Sora." He's startled out of his melancholy when he turns to see who's come to join him. He'd been so preoccupied with the dandelion that he hadn't even noticed Pooh approach. "Is this your thoughtful spot too?"
"W-what?" Sora asks weakly.
"This is where I go when I want to think," Pooh explains, taking a seat next to Sora. "Usually I come here to think about honey. But today, I wanted to come here to think about you."
Sora sighs, not needing to really wonder why Pooh would want to think about him after what he just did. "I'm sorry, Pooh," he mutters, hugging his knees just a bit tighter. "I shouldn't have yelled at all of you. I just… didn't know how to tell you what's going to happen to me…"
"What is going to happen to you?" Pooh inquires curiously.
Despite everything, Sora finds himself letting out a small, bitter laugh as he runs his claws through his pure white hair. "I wish I knew…" he admits softly. Because really, he has no idea how any of this will end. He has no clue which side will win, and which one of those sides he'll end up standing on by the time it's all over. He doesn't know what kind of future he might have, if he'll even get to have a future at all. The only thing he really does know now… is how scared he is of facing any of it.
"...Hey, Pooh?" he asks after a long stretch of silence. "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course you can, Sora," Pooh easily obliges.
Even so, Sora hesitates, lightly biting his lip as he stares off into the green fields below. "Do you remember when we first met? How you were trying to figure out how to… 'say goodbye' to yourself?"
"Hm… think, think, think…" the bear taps his head as he ponders that memory. "Yes, I believe I do remember that. Why do you ask?"
"...I…" Sora cuts himself off briefly as he presses a light hand over his heart. "Do you think you could help me learn how to say goodbye to myself too?"
"So you want to say goodbye to 'Sora'?" Pooh questions, as calm and patient as ever. "Why would you want to do that?"
Despite his best efforts, Sora isn't able to hold back the pressing tears as he grips his heart just a bit tighter, as if that'll keep whatever's left of it from slipping away. "I-I won't be around for much longer…" he says, his voice barely above a mournful whisper. "Or at least… I won't be myself for much longer…"
"Hm…" Pooh taps his chin thoughtfully. "Well if you won't be Sora, then whoever shall you be?"
Though asked in innocence, this question only serves to break Sora down even more. He chokes out a small sob, overwhelmed with sudden grief. "I… don't know…" he answers, even though he knows that's not entirely true.
In a strange sort of way, he feels like he's dying, even though he knows he isn't. He's been on the brink of death before, has even been pulled into it only to be pulled right out moments later. Even so, the feeling he has right now is different from any of those times. When he'd sacrificed himself for Kairi, when he'd set Roxas and Xion free… he knew he would die and he'd been at peace with it, he'd accepted his fate with grace and dignity and resolution. But now… now that an uncertain, unknown life awaits him, the exact opposite of death itself… he realizes that he's terrified of it. He doesn't want whatever that life might be, he doesn't want whatever future his foes have in store for him. He doesn't want to lose himself to the darkness he's been drowning in for well over a year now, he doesn't want to disappear into its cold, lonely, hateful depths.
He doesn't want to die… only to be forced to live.
Sora tries to wipe a few of his tears away when he realizes Pooh is watching him intently. Surprisingly, he doesn't comment on his crying as he says something surprising. "If you're going to say goodbye to Sora, then I will say goodbye to Pooh. So that if we both go away together, that means the two of us can stay together always."
"Aw, Pooh…" Sora offers him a frail smile between his lingering tears. "That's not… I didn't mean… y-you don't have to say goodbye to yourself too."
"But if I don't, then you'll go away again…" Pooh frowns. "I very much wish that you could stay here with me and all of our friends."
"I can't, I… I… huh," Sora stops himself short. There's a sudden strong appeal in what Pooh had just suggested, in the possibility that he could stay here. Here, in a world that's safe from the Heartless, safe from the Organization, safe from the darkness that's been nipping at his heels for months now. Here, in a world away from the guardians of light, away from the pressure of having to stay in their good graces, away from the fear that he might slip up and that their kindness toward him might somehow turn to hatred. Here, in a world where his friends are endlessly forgiving and understanding, here in a world where he can breathe easy and relax, here in a world where he feels like he can finally learn how to be himself again.
Here… in a world resting between pages, in a world of quiet, contented make-believe. A world he knows he shouldn't stay in… but wants to more than anything else. And after denying his own wants for such a long time now, it's only fair that he finally gives himself something for a change.
"You know what? Sure," he finally smiles in full, a smile that Pooh shares as they both rise to their feet and head down the hill together. "I'll stay."
And stay he does, long through the afternoon, all the way to the evening. After making amends with the rest of the gang, Sora spends the rest of the day with Pooh by his side. He makes good on his promise to help Eeyore find his tail, eventually locating it high up in the branches of a tree with a bit of help from Tigger and Roo. He also makes good on his word to try out Rabbit's tea, though he can't say he's fond of the rather intense flavor–but he pretends to bear it for his friend's sake as he successfully manages to convince Owl that he's not sick after all. He even helps Pooh and Piglet find an unguarded beehive, getting it down so the bear can snack on its fresh honey as much as he pleases.
And though he wears a gentle smile on his face all the while… Sora knows it isn't really a genuine one. He tries to let himself relax, to let himself have some fun, to let himself be happy. But for as much as he tries, for as content and carefree as all of his friends around him are… Sora struggles to share any of those feelings with them. To the point that as the day wears on toward night, he begins to wonder if he even remembers how to even be happy at all.
Not helping is what hangs over him in the place of that happiness. In the spaces between the trees, he continues to see what he thinks are the shadows of his fellow members, of the Organization that's been pursuing him relentlessly across every other world he's been to. Wouldn't it make perfect sense that they'd follow him here too? Even if none of those shadows turn out to be real, he worries that one of them might end up being true. That one among their ruthless number will emerge from the trees to take him away and tear this beautiful world he loves so much apart, page by page. And even if they're not here now, certainly his master must be watching his every move; he knows he's here, knows he's afraid of them coming for him, knows exactly how to rip everything he cares about, everything he holds dear right out of his hands just like he always does.
Those are the thoughts that plague him as he tries to fall asleep under the stars that night. The weather is warm and pleasant enough for everyone to camp out on top of the hill, and while everyone else is already fast asleep, only Sora remains wide awake. And the longer he remains awake, the more he starts to regret his spontaneous decision to stay here. The more he realizes that every second he hides away here is another second he's putting everyone who lives here at risk.
He came here for goodbyes, only to consider staying here for an escape. An escape from his foes, from his friends, from his fate. But he should have known better from the very start. He can't escape this, he can't escape any of this. His master has told him that much time and time again and the evidence that he's right is more than clear each time he simply looks at his own reflection. His destiny, no matter how dark it might be, will follow him wherever he goes. Which means there's only one thing he can do now; instead of continuing to run and hide and cower in the futile hope that it'll all go away someday… maybe it's time for him to finally stand and face it all.
Maybe it's time for him to face his fears… no matter how immense and awful those fears might be.
And in facing those fears… maybe it's time for him to put his last fleeting shreds of freedom to good use. To give whatever he can of his ruined life so that his dearest friends, his beloved family, might have a chance to live much better ones in his stead.
That's the thought that prompts him to sit up, glancing around at his snoozing friends surrounding him. He wants to bid each of them a sincere farewell, but doesn't have it in his heart to wake any of them from their peaceful slumber. So instead, he quietly gets up and begins to make his way down the hill, unaware that someone else has awakened and is following only a few steps behind him.
Sora summons his Keyblade when he's far enough away from the others. It's cracked beyond repair, condemned to the same kind of desolation ravaging his heart and body. But even for as damaged as it might be, he treasures it all the same, every bit as much as he treasures this world. After all, both are reminders of his past, of who he used to be, of how good his life had once been. He has nothing left to hold onto of that life other than his memories now, but he cherishes each and every one of them, even though he knows he has to leave them behind.
He holds his Keyblade aloft to do exactly that, though just before he can, he's stopped by a familiar call behind him. "Are you leaving, Sora?"
He isn't surprised when he turns to find Pooh standing there, a questioning, almost sad look on his face. He can't bear to lie to him, even after their conversation earlier. So he briefly puts his Keyblade away, heads over to the bear, and kneels down to his level to tell him the truth. "...Yes, I am…" he says quietly, dejectedly. "I'm sorry, Pooh… I know I said I'd stay, but… I have to go. There's something… important I have to do."
"Hm…" Pooh closes his eyes and ponders this for a moment. "Will you return once you're finished?"
Sora tears his gaze away from the bear, already knowing the answer to that question. It weighs heavy on his heart, the thought of never coming back to this world or any of the other worlds he's grown so fond of. Of never getting to see all of the wonderful friends he's made along the way. He'd promised so many of them that they'd meet again, but he knows that promise is one he won't be able to keep, no matter how much he wishes he could. "Pooh… I-I…" he stops himself, taking in a steadying breath as he takes a different angle entirely. "Even if… if I don't come back soon… we'll still be together. Don't forget, I'll always be right here," he smiles as he points at Pooh's heart. "No matter how far apart we might be."
Pooh is quick to share Sora's smile upon hearing this, believing it wholeheartedly. "Yes," he agrees happily. "If I think of you now and again, then it will be like you never left. For even if you're gone from my sight, you're never gone from my heart."
"Exactly," Sora nods as a few tears finally slip out. Overwhelmed with sudden emotion, he pulls Pooh into a tight embrace, one that the bear readily returns. "Goodbye, Pooh…" he whispers, torn between grief and fondness. "And thank you… for everything."
"Goodbye, Sora," Pooh returns as they slowly part, still smiling cheerfully all the while. "I still hope to see you again someday."
"...Yeah," Sora says, his tears falling a bit harder as he turns to leave. "I hope so too…"
A hope that's in vain… but still one that's worth holding on to all the same.
Pooh stands by, watching and waving as Sora summons a dark portal to leave through. Still, he turns back to his friend one final time, a weak smile on his face as he offers him one last wave, as he takes one final glance at a world he knows he'll never be able to return to. As he says goodbye to yet another part of his stolen, shattered childhood.
As he says farewell to the wood… and farewell to himself along with it.
With Sora spending most of the day inside of the book, the lights make the most of the opportunity to hold a lengthy meeting. Perhaps their most important meeting yet, really, meant to decide how their initial plan of attack against the Organization will go. They invite the Restoration Committee to weigh in, each of its members eager to do whatever they can to aid the cause. And even if they can't go to battle against Xehanort themselves, they're still ready to work behind the scenes to try and find a backup solution, just in case.
"So it's settled then," Merlin concludes at the tail end of the first half of their discussion. "We shall return to Radiant Garden and speak to Ienzo. With all of that heart-related research he and his colleagues have been conducting lately, they're bound to know something that can help Sora's condition."
"But if you need any backup on the battlefield," Leon offers, resolute. "Then we can be there at a moment's notice."
"Yeah! All you've gotta do is call us up and we'll be there to help you knock those black-coated freaks into next week!" Yuffie chimes in excitedly.
"It's the least we can do if it means it might set Sora free," Aerith adds just as supportively.
"Thanks," Riku says, glad to have so many loyal allies on their side. "But believe it or not, my plan is for us to bring a smaller group to confront the Organization. At least at first."
"A smaller group?" Axel pipes up, confused. "Uh… don't you think we'd be better off going in with everything we've got if we wanna win?"
"Not necessarily," Riku counters with a small, sly smile.
"It might sound a bit out there," Mickey says, grinning himself. "But Riku came up with a pretty clever idea. If it works, we might finally be able to get one step ahead of Xehanort!"
"But how?" Xion asks, frowning. "It seems like he's already planned for everything."
"He's planned for everything to go his way, yes," Riku nods. "He expects us all to come together at the Keyblade Graveyard and give him the clash of seven lights and thirteen darkness that he wants. But what he isn't expecting is for us to arrive shorthanded."
"The plan is simple," Aqua says, already in on it alongside Riku and Mickey. "Instead of seven of us, only six will go to face the Organization. Without Sora, they'll be missing a member too, which means the clash that Xehanort wants so badly won't be able to happen."
"Not unless he agrees to our terms for a change," Riku finishes confidently.
"And those terms are…?" Ventus asks.
Riku takes in a deep breath, his expression unflinching as he presents the lynchpin of his plan. A plan he can only hope will be enough to somehow save Sora after all. "Either he sets Sora's heart free… or that clash never happens."
Silence settles over the other lights as they all contemplate this idea, each of them finding pros and cons in it almost right away. And while most of them want to support their leader in this rather risky endeavor, at least one among them has no reservations about speaking up to give his thoughts on it. "You're going to try and reason with Xehanort?" Roxas scoffs, crossing his arms. "Good luck with that. If you think that'll be enough to convince him to let Sora go, then you don't know how stubborn he really is."
"Gawrsh, sounds like Sora and Xehanort have at least one thing in common then, huh?" Goofy jokes to Donald, aside.
"Not funny," Donald counters, though he's still smirking all the while.
"I never said it was a foolproof plan," Riku counters calmly. "But if nothing else, it'll buy us a little more time. And it'll keep as many of us as possible standing and ready to fight. If we all go in at once, then we might not all make it out alive. Xehanort only needs seven of us; if we go to him with six, then we'll be able to play it safe until we have no choice but to go all-in."
"What's the plan when he doesn't agree to our conditions?" Terra asks, knowing just as well as all of the others that he very likely won't.
Riku exchanges a glance with Kairi, already briefed on his backup plan. A plan that, while incredibly risky, might just be their best bet at ending this war before it can even begin. "While we barter with him, Kairi's going to be working on a powerful light spell to blind them all," Riku explains. "As soon as we're finished stalling and she unleashes it… that's when the six of us are going to make our move. And with little luck… we'll finish this. All of it."
"Well… I guess when you put it like that, it sounds pretty easy," Ven notes, scratching his head.
"Too easy, if you ask me," Axel says, raising a skeptical eyebrow.
"Rest assured, defeating Xehanort will indeed be a difficult task," Yen Sid interjects, his eyes closed in contemplation, his hands folded neatly on his desk. "But if you stay the course that Riku has suggested and fight together as one… then I have no doubts that you will succeed. In diminishing the Organization's dark designs, in rescuing the worlds from their twisted schemes, and above all else-"
"Saving Sora," Riku finishes solemnly, yet steadily. "No matter what happens, no matter how this all goes, there are no other options. That's how this has to end."
"And that's how it will end," Kairi assures as she takes Riku's hand. "He's given so much of himself for each of us before. It's time we gave all we have for him."
No one even thinks of protesting such a sentiment, each of them more than ready to repay all of the immense, selfless sacrifices Sora has made for them in the past. Ready to fight with everything they have, every ounce of strength that fills them, every beat of each of their hearts, to save someone who deserves it so very much. Someone who unquestionably matters to every one of them, no matter how they might have come to know him, no matter how different they might all seem. If the guardians of light are united in only one thing, it's this: in how much they care about, how much they all love Sora… and how every last one of them is willing to do whatever it takes to set his wounded, wayward heart free.
"If only six of us are going to the graveyard, then I need volunteers," Riku says to his team, his tone turning grave and serious. "There's no telling what could happen, even if everything goes according to plan. I don't want any of you feeling like you have to come if you don't want to, but-"
Riku stops himself when he notices each and every last one of the lights raising their hands to volunteer. He can't help but smile, appreciating their willingness to risk it all, knowing that if Sora were standing here with them right now, he'd certainly feel the same. "Ok, well… like I said, we only need six, and Kairi and I already make two, so-"
"I need to go," Roxas steps forward, glaring firmly in Riku's direction. "I already fought for him inside of his heart–it's time I fought for him outside of it too."
"Same here," Ventus volunteers with a daring smile. "He gave me a second chance all those years ago. It just wouldn't be right if I didn't return the favor."
"I'm coming too," Aqua says, a hand resting over her heart. "Sora pulled me up out of the darkness before; I want to do whatever I can to do the same for him."
"And with me coming along, I'd say that makes six," Mickey says, standing alongside Riku as he shoots him an encouraging grin. "Like I told ya before, Riku, I'm with you, every step of the way."
Riku offers the king a thankful nod before giving the same to each of his other noble volunteers. The other lights, despite wanting to come and help, gracefully concede, knowing that by not coming along, they'll still play an important part in helping Sora even still. "Uh, so what are the rest of us supposed to do while the rest of you are off saving the day?" Axel asks, a question the rest of the remaining lights largely share.
"Stay on standby," Riku instructs. "If things go wrong, that's when we'll need as many hands as we can get."
"And Sora?" Kairi asks, looking to Riku earnestly. "Where is he going to be during all of this?"
Riku hesitates, sighing as he thinks of the almost impossible task ahead of them. Of how difficult it will be to keep Sora away from a war his friends are all waging solely for his sake. Of how they absolutely have to if any of this is going to work. "...We're going to keep him as far away from this fight as we possibly can, until it's all finally over."
"Um, speaking of Sora…" Naminé interjects as she peeks her head into the chamber. "He just got back from the book."
Riku and Kairi exchange a glance at this, deciding that they should be the ones to greet him for more reasons than one. To tell him what they can of their plans without revealing too much… and to make sure that he's well after saying goodbye to so many of his treasured friends.
As soon as they leave the sorcerer's chamber, however, Kairi poses a curious question, one of many she's sure she'll have over the next several arduous days alone. "So… what exactly did you mean when you said we're keeping Sora away from the fight?" she asks, biting her lip. She's well aware of what Sora is afraid of, of being trapped and restrained and sequestered away. She knows that's likely not what Riku had meant, but still… she can't help but be at least a little worried all the same.
"I meant that we're going to take him somewhere we know he'll want to stay," Riku glances back at her. "With someone we know he'll listen to."
"Huh?" Kairi frowns, though she's quick to gather what he means a mere moment later. "Ohhh… But… he's been gone for so long. Do you think he'll even be… ok with going to see her after… after how much he's changed?"
"Even if he's not, I bet she wants to see him more than anything," Riku assures as they approach the room the book had been resting in. "And that'll be more than enough to convince Sora with how much he's always hated letting her down. Besides," a small, bittersweet smile fills his features as he stops short just outside the door. "Just in case things… don't turn out the way we want them to… I think we all deserve a chance to say goodbye to everyone who's been waiting for us, don't you?"
Kairi nods, her heart aching with longing at the very thought. The thought of seeing everyone she left behind again… and the thought that this could very well be the very last time she might get to see them at all. "How long do we have?"
"You and I will stay there three days to make sure he's settled," Riku tells her softly. "Then, once we leave, that's where he'll stay until…"
"Until he's free…" Kairi finishes for him, taking both of his hands in hers. "Until we're all free from this. Then we can finally go back and stay there right along with him…"
"Right where we used to be…" Riku closes his eyes, smiling fondly. There had been a time, not so many years ago, when he'd seen that distant shore as a prison, when he had craved nothing more than to break out from beyond its confining borders. But now… now the only thing he could ever want, the only thing he could ever hope for, is to finally sit in the warmth of its setting sun, with the two people he loves most right by his side for the rest of their days.
With one final nod, the pair open the door to find Sora standing with his back turned to them. He holds the Hundred Acre Wood book gently in his hands, staring at its cover as he skims it lightly with his thumb. Even from a distance, Riku and Kairi can tell that the image on that cover has changed to reflect how Sora looks now–white hair, red claws, black antennae and all. And yet he still sits on a log alongside Winnie the Pooh… and he still smiles on that cover all the same.
"Um… Sora?" Kairi speaks up, pulling him out of his daze. "Are you ok?"
He turns, slightly surprised as he rushes to wipe the lingering tears out of his eyes. Even so, his smile reflects the one on the cover, soft and sad, yet sincere as he places the book on the table beside him. "Y-yeah," he answers, though Riku and Kairi can both tell that's not entirely true. "I'm fine."
"How was your visit?" Riku asks carefully, not wanting to bring any unpleasant emotions to the surface.
And yet, Sora's smile widens a bit as he rests a tender hand atop the book, one final tear streaking down his cheek as he replies quietly. "It… it was nice…"
Kairi shares his smile, relieved as she takes a small step forward. "Riku and I came down here because we wanted to tell you what we plan on doing tomorrow."
"Oh?" Sora asks curiously as his grin turns a touch more playful. "Don't tell me it's another party; after that last one a few days ago, I… think I've had enough celebrating for a long while."
"It's not a party, silly," Kairi chuckles warmly.
"Sora," Riku places a hand on his shoulder, his remaining eye bright, his expression filled with care and kindness. "Tomorrow, you, Kairi, and I are going to the Destiny Islands," he says, and as he does, he pulls the ground right out from under Sora altogether as he realizes what that means. As he thinks about who he'll have to see after spending so many months away, after becoming a different person from the one who had left her entirely. And yet… he still manages a smile all the same when Riku reiterates their destination, a place he's been dreaming of for months now… finally within reach.
"We're going home."
So yeah I'm a little emotionally roughed up after this chapter and the next one certainly won't help matters. We're approaching our endgame, folks and I'm getting very excited bout it! But we do have one more "calm before the storm" sort of chapter before it all goes down. So be on the lookout for that hopefully... sometime soon (like I said, I'm moving soon so I'm gonna take a little time off to settle in). And until then don't forget to REVIEW! Until next time!
